Too Busy for Your Own Good (34 page)

Examine the negativity closely. “What's the worst that can happen?”

Reprogram them if you have the energy and love. Meet with them in private and say, “I've noticed you've hit a rough patch, and you might not be aware of how negative you've become. I don't think that this is who you really are.” Frequently, when they are made aware of how they've slipped into being a “no person,” they take it upon themselves to improve.

First cousins to a “no person,” indecisives and stallers avoid making decisions. They drive you crazy by wasting so much time researching something to death, looking at all the options, and wanting a perfect result. These folks can stall a sale and limit your productivity if you let them.

If you want an answer or decision from those over-aiming lions:

Give them no more than two or three alternatives and your opinion as to which one is best and why you think so. “We can go with one of these three logos. I think the middle one most suits all our needs for clarity, color, and professionalism.”

Give them a deadline and the decision or action you will take if they pass that time limit. “If I don't hear from you by tomorrow afternoon, I will proceed with my choice.”

Make a pro and con list with them. “In situations like this, I like to look at both sides to this decision. You've mentioned 1, 2, and 3 as reasons for going ahead (write under pro). What else might we consider?”

Make a decision with their help. “It seems like there are more reasons to go forward. I'll draw up the paperwork this afternoon and return for your approval.”

Silence is powerful. When silent, unresponsive or passive people use it to manipulate you, wiggle out of a hot seat, or blow you off—you need to be clever and persistent. The Silent Clam is staring at you; your major task is to get him to talk.

Set an appropriate time limit for how long you're going to wait until dealing with them.

Ask for their opinion, “What do you think is the best way to proceed?”

Give them your friendly silent stare—you're looking at them expectantly, with a pleasant expression, raising your eyebrows, nodding your head, smiling slightly, or waving them on with your hand. “OK, go on.”

You can figuratively step to the side. “I'm expecting you to comment, and you're not. What does that indicate?”

You can counter their “I don't know” with “What else?” to engage them further.

As your last resort, check your interpretation of their silent response. “You look angry (frustrated, annoyed, etc.), am I right?”