True (17 page)

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The next morning, I awoke to the sounds of the girls running into the room.

“Mommy! We're hungry!” Olivia shouts.

“Can we have pancakes?” Jordyn chimes in.

I glance at the clock to see that it is nine in the morning. Alex and I had only fallen asleep at six. My muscles were deliciously sore as a result of his stellar performance last night. I looked over to see that he wasn't in bed. I sat up and looked at my phone to see if there was a message from him, but there was nothing.

“Hurry, Mama! I hungry!”

“Okay, okay. You girls go make your beds, and I'll be down in a second.” They both scurried away to do as I'd asked. I walked on shaky thighs to use the restroom and then I went to grab my robe from the closet door. That's when I noticed on the nightstand that there were papers with little red tabs attached to the side of several sheets. There was also a big yellow sticky note stuck to the front. I instantly recognized the handwriting on the note as Alex's.

Last night, I tried. I love you, but I can't do this anymore. Please sign.

It was as if everything around me was moving in slow motion. I numbly set the note aside, and I read the top of the stack of papers.

Petition for Dissolution of Marriage

Alexander P. Turner

Vs.

Courtney P. Turner
.

A baseball bat to the face would have hurt less at that moment. I sank to my knees as I held the papers in one hand and my chest in the other. Is this really happening? My body began to shake violently with sobs as the tears rolled down my cheeks. Divorce? He wants a divorce? No counseling, no second chances. I always thought foolishly that I could always convince Alex to stay with me. Like I held some sort of ultimate power over his heart and that he would never willingly choose to be without me.

Now, staring down at the papers already signed by him, I knew I was wrong. So wrong.

As I lie back on the floor ready to let the emptiness and despair consume my body, I hear,

“Mama! Pancakes!” Jordyn's voice manages to pull me back to reality. That's when I decide that I have to keep it together. My girls need me. Thank God for that otherwise I didn't think I could survive this alone.

Chapter Seventeen

Past- 9 years ago.

It was a beautiful evening in July and the sun was setting. The sounds of waves crashing, and the smell of the ocean calmed my senses. I was about to marry Alex, my one and only true love.

It had been two months since he proposed. As soon as I told my mom about our engagement, she immediately got to work planning my wedding as if she’s been waiting to do it my whole life. I thought Alex and I would have a longer engagement because don't most people wait a year or something to make things official? The venue needed to be booked, caterers to decide on, and dresses to be ordered. I seemed to be the only person with this thought because when I mentioned my mom’s ideas to Alex he said:

“Baby, I’d marry you today. I don’t give a damn how it’s supposed to be done as long as you’re my wife as soon as possible.”

So, after a whirlwind of resourceful wedding planning, my mother very craftily pulled together a beautiful event at my Aunt Maggie's beach house, which was only a thirty-minute drive for everyone. I was able to find a dress in a vintage clothing shop and had a seamstress make slight alterations to create my very own one of a kind dress. Dee and Macy were my bridesmaids, and I let them choose what they wanted to wear; both opted for blue knee length dresses. Alex’s favorite color.

I was just finishing up my makeup when my mom, Macy and Dee all came into the room.

“It’s almost time, dear heart!” Mom singsongs as she crosses the room to prep my dress for me to put on. After slipping into it, I am speechless at the sight in front of me. My hair is pulled back into a bun that rests on the left side with small white and blue flowers tucked in it. I am wearing a beautiful, strapless lace dress that hugs my figure perfectly and flows in a short train behind. The gown used to have sleeves, but I had them removed and I couldn’t be happier with the results.

“Oh, Court. You look beautiful.” Dee sighs as she walks around me in a circle taking in all the details of the dress. “I can’t believe this is the same thing you showed me that day in the shop. I didn’t think it was going to work, and I tried my best to talk you out of buying it, remember?”

“Oh, I remember.” I laughed as I smoothed my hand against the material.

“I’m so glad you didn’t listen.” Dee smiles and winks.

I pulled her to stand next to me while my mom chatters and fusses over Macy’s hair.

“Can you believe that we are both going to be married women after today?” I whisper excitedly.

“I know and I’m so happy for us!” Dee answers wistfully.

Dee and Cole flew to Vegas alone and got married six months ago. Since Dee was already pregnant she didn't want to wait until her belly was showing in her wedding picture.

My eyes fell right to her large baby bump and watched her glowing face as she gently rubs a hand over it, her diamond wedding rings sparkling in the mirror as she gives me a glowing smile.

A lot can happen in a year.
Cole worships the ground she walks on, and she deserves it.

“You're not just my best friend, Court, you’re my sister. I love you. Alex is an amazing guy, and I know he’ll make you happy.”

We both hug and quickly wipe away the tears before our makeup is ruined.

“Ok, it’s time to go!” I hear my mom say, and we all exit the room together; the three women in my life who give me strength escort me to my future.

My eyes immediately find his as he waits for me at the end of the path of flowers. I can see the joy, contentment and love shining on his face. I’m sure my face mirrors the same. My heart feels like it’s going to explode with happiness, and it takes all I have to not sprint to Alex and throw myself in his arms.

When I finally reach him, he places my hand in his and rubs soothing circles on them with his thumbs as we face each other and recite our vows. We choose to stick with the traditional words since neither one of us wanted to go all poetic in front of everyone. Some
things are for us alone
.
There was a slight break in his voice as he spoke his words of love to me, and a single tear rolled down his face as I repeated the same promise to him.

I wanted to smile, laugh out loud and ball my eyes out all at once.

“I now pronounce you husband and wife.” His lips were on mine instantly, and he stole my breath away with our first kiss as Mr. and Mrs. Alex Turner. “I love you so much.” He whispered as he pulled back to rest his forehead on mine.

“I love you, too. More than I can ever say with words.”

I was in a haze of happiness and total bliss the entire day. I couldn’t believe it was all happening and that I married my Alex.

When the song for our first dance began to play, I looked at him with a sassy grin.

“Since we’re each other’s true and all...” I shrugged playfully as the band started the beginning chords of “True” by Spandau Ballet.

“Baby, it’s perfect.” Alex smiled down at me. “From now on, this is our song.”

We held each other close and swayed to the music, letting the words fill our hearts.

This is the sound of my soul. This is the sound.

I am his and he is mine.

Forever.

Chapter Eighteen

Present
.

“Mr. Turner has agreed to Mrs. Turner keeping the family home…”

I feel completely numb sitting here at the mediation table across from a blank-faced Alex as our marital assets are being discussed and divided. It has been six weeks since the morning I woke to find the divorce papers. While he has been over to see the girls and take them out for day trips, he was careful to not be alone with me. He has refused to talk to me about anything that didn’t involve the girls or household bills. I even went to his office to confront him, feeling like he couldn’t avoid me forever. I knew he would be there and I planned to make him talk to me. I have never been made to feel so foolish and unwanted in my life.

*****

Four weeks ago.

I pulled open the doors to the office building and stopped at the reception desk where Mina greeted me with her usual bubbly manner.

“Hi, Courtney! Cute blouse.”

I absently looked down to see that I had chosen one of my favorite pale pink tops, not even aware that I was wearing it, in fact, I had no recollection of even getting dressed this morning. I've been on autopilot for the past few weeks.

“Hello Mina, um thanks. Is Alex in?” Getting right to the point and not caring to make usual small talk.

Mina glanced over at the massive phone operation center in front of her.

“He’s on a conference call right now. Should I send him an email to let him know that you are here?”

I battled with indecision for a moment. Would he see me? It was one thing to barge in and speak to him right away; it was another to sit and wait.

“Um, sure.” I replied weakly. Mina gave me a puzzled look before she typed out a quick email to Alex and hit send. After several agonizing minutes, there was a ding, indicating that he had responded back to her. Mina read the message and frowned up at me.

“Sorry, Courtney. He says that the meeting just started and won’t be over for a couple of hours. He doesn’t want to be disturbed.”

“Oh.” I replied. Then I felt my phone buzz. I pulled it out to see that it was a text from Alex.

Alex: Stop. Don’t bring this to my work.

His words knocked the wind out of my lungs, and it took everything in me to not crumple into a pathetic heap on the floor. I suddenly felt like a crazy bunny boiler.

With as much dignity as I could muster, I pasted a fake smile on my face and spoke to Mina.

“It’s okay. He just sent me a text and told me he’d call me later.” Lie. “So much for surprising him, right?” Truth. I hoped she didn’t notice the shakiness in my voice as I willed myself not to cry.

“Is everything alright, Courtney?” The loo
k of sympathy she gave me was too much, all I could do was quickly nod, throw a quick wave and force myself to walk instead of run out of the office.

“Is that agreeable to both parties?” Wade Morrison asked. Yes, Morrison. Alex’s old pothead roommate was a lawyer now. I was shocked to see him and nearly didn’t recognize him when I first stepped into the conference room. It had been at least eight or nine years since I last saw him. I knew that Alex kept in touch but never really offered updates, and I didn’t care enough to ask. His shaggy blond hair was now worn in a proper short, professional cut. He went from grungy and lazy
to it should be illegal to wear that suit as well as he is. His blue eyes, however, still had a hint of lazy mischief I remembered about him, but the rest of his face said he was all business. Apparently there is no waiting period on divorce in the state of Florida and having a lawyer for a friend clearly helped Alex speed things up.

“Mrs. Turner?” I felt my own lawyer nudge me. Dion Drake was an older African-American man who I connected with instantly after consulting with a few attorneys. I always thought if I ever got divorced that I would pick a real ball-buster for a lawyer but what sold me on Dion was his
kindness. I could see compassion in his eyes when he smiled at me as I told him my story. No judgment, just the willingness to help get me through it. I realized that I needed that. It was a welcome change from the looks of disappointment and pity I have been getting from my friends and family lately.

“Yes. I agree.” I quickly answer. Honestly, I couldn’t care less about any of the crap we’ve accumulated over the years as long as I had a home for the girls and financial support to help me provide for them. Morrison checks off a few items on the list in front of him.

“Now, the matter of custody.” My head snaps up immediately. “Mr. Turner has proposed a weekly rotation schedule. He retrieves the children from Mrs. Turner’s home at five in the afternoon on Fridays and Mrs. Turner retrieves them from Mr. Turner’s residence at five in the afternoon the following Friday and so on.”

“What? Wait,” I finally speak up, “Alex travels for work a lot. Who will look after the girls during the time he’s away?”

Morrison and Alex exchanged glances.

“Mr. Turner has accepted another position within his company that no longer requires travel.” I let my gaze travel to Alex’s face in disbelief. For years, he’s known how much I hated that he had to travel, and he’d always made it seem like it was his only option. I mean, shit,
it’s part of the reason for our marital problems. And now, he manages to secure a position where he doesn’t have to travel.

Unfuckingbelievable
!

Alex’s face reddens and he presses his lips together, that’s when I realize I just said all that out loud.

“Alex don’t do this. Don’t make them sleep away from their home. Please. You can see them anytime you want.”