Trust Me (Beggar's Choice #2) (15 page)

“Well, nothing’s going to come of
it so please keep it to yourself,” I say briskly. “I’m sure we’ll slot back
into the friendship we’ve been building without any awkwardness.” Ignoring her
dubious look I kiss her goodnight but all the time I’m aware of Sid’s brooding
stare that follows me as I say my goodbyes, and I can’t help but think that I
might be wrong and that we might have started a fire tonight that won’t burn
out cleanly.

Back at the bus I can’t settle.
My skin feels tight like I’m trying to come out of it and I can feel myself
throbbing. My cheeks grow hot and I press my hands to them recalling the events
of earlier in flashes: his skin against mine; the sight of the dark pubic hair
growing around his long, thick cock; the sounds we made; the feel of him and
the look on his face of pleasure and agony. What are we going to do now because
it’s impossible to ignore this, especially now that it’s happened twice? Just
the thought of it makes me squirm and I pace a few steps forward and backward.
It’s lucky that there’s nobody on the bus with me because I must look like a
complete maniac at the moment. Everyone else has stopped at the party helping
Charlie and Mabe to celebrate and the silence is making my thoughts close in
around me.

A thought occurs to me and at
once I move to my wardrobe to get my running clothes out. What I need right now
is to run with nothing but the music from my iPod in my head. That will clear
my brain and give me a chance to think, because I do my best thinking when I’m
running. Decided, I pull out my black running shorts with my black and orange
striped tank, pull them on and then bang my feet into my old running shoes. I
pull my hair back into a stubby ponytail and push my iPod into the holder on my
arm and then move down the bus to the door.

“Where you going?” asks Dave
appearing from the front of the bus.

“I’m just going for a quick run,”
I say, smiling at him.

“At this time of night?” he
protests, looking out of the window.

“It’s not that late. I’ve run a
lot later than this. Don’t worry about it Dave, I’ll be fine.”

“I don’t think Sid’s going to
like it. You know what a fuss he made when you walked back on your own in
Paris.” I do remember. It had been loud and had ended up with one of the
security guards taken off them and put on me instead.

“Never mind Sid,” I say,
coaxingly.

“What about Simon?” he asks,
referencing my burly security guard.

“He dropped me back at the bus
and he’s gone back to the party. He obviously thinks that I’ve gone to bed.
Don’t worry about it Dave. I’ll be fine. I’m only running round the park. I’ll
stick to the best lit areas and I’ll be back before you know it.”

“I’ll come with you.”

“I thought you had to stay with
the buses.” He sags in defeat and I smile at him and move past him
determinedly. He’s not my dad and as much as I appreciate the concern I’ve got
along just fine on my own for years. “See you later.”

“I’m timing you Nell,” he shouts.
“If you’re not back in thirty minutes I’m calling Sid.”

I wave my hand in agreement
because I’ll be back long before that, and then push myself into some stretches
to warm up and then I set off. At first it’s hard because after coming like I
did with Sid the only thing my body really wants to do is crash out, but after
a few minutes my body relaxes into the familiar rhythm and I settle into my
strides, feeling the air clean and cold in my lungs and the movement of my
muscles. I don’t put on my music after all because I’m not stupid, and I know
the dangers of running alone while deaf and insensible to the surroundings. I
also keep a keen eye on my environment. There’s quite a lot of people milling
about after the concert and even a few joggers so I feel fairly safe, and none
of them notice me, not equating the singer on stage to the female jogger.

As I run I think about the events
of tonight. The almost sex had pushed the fact that I’d been front of stage for
the first time in three years to the back of my mind, and now I allow it to
come forward. I remember the familiar feelings of power and elation that I’d
always felt, but to my surprise, although I dig deep, I can’t feel any of the
old urges to do it again, and I realise that I don’t need that at this point in
my life.

Being with Sid and the band,
playing music with them and sharing the rhythms of the day satisfies me in a
way that I haven’t felt before. It’s a life full of music but without any of
the huge responsibilities that I used to shoulder as the front person. I’d
always been so focused on keeping the band and Sam together and worried about
how everyone was that I’d never relaxed and enjoyed it like I’m doing now. The
sheer fact that the band disintegrated so quickly when I took my eye off it
proves how easily that happens.

I don’t want to be constantly
vigilant and I realise that all along Sid has been taking these burdens off
everyone, leaving them free. I don’t think that’s entirely altruistic on his
behalf either. I think he does it because he’s good at it and he enjoys the
control and the details, maybe because he lived in a world of chaos for so
long.

I take care to remind myself that
I won’t have this for long for about the millionth time, but for the first time
I consider doing this more often. I know backing jobs are scarcer now than they
used to be, but with recommendations from Beggar’s Choice I could surely get
more work. Cameron’s job offer also comes to mind and I know that I could do
that too. Still the hope of new horizons doesn’t stem the sadness at not seeing
everyone anymore. I push this aside as I do thoughts of him. I can’t think
about that tonight, not when I’m still sore.

I pace myself but the park is
bigger than I thought and it’s a good fifty minutes later that I jog into the
coach park, but luckily there’s no sign of a welcoming party in the form of a
hot guitarist breathing fire. In fact there’s no one about and both buses are
dark. Coming to a stop I bend over, breathing deeply and stretching my legs out
to avoid cramps. I’m running my hand through my hair and thinking of taking a
shower when I hear a voice behind me.

“You’re that’s singer from the
Beggar’s Choice concert tonight aren’t you?”

I jump and hold a hand to my
chest in shock and look at the two men who appear from the shadows of a parked
bus. They’re fairly young but even at this distance I can smell the booze on
them and I see that one is swaying quite badly.

“I am,” I say cautiously because
I don’t like the look of them. “Are you waiting for autographs from the boys?”

“We were,” says the one that
isn’t swaying, with very strongly accented English. He takes a step towards me
and then looks quickly around the park. It’s the look that worries me because
it says that he’s up to no good and I quickly break into speech.

“Well, I just spoke to them and
they’re on the way back. They should be here any minute. Why don’t you wait
near the bus and Dave will get you a drink.”

“That’s the driver?” I nod. “He
walked off about ten minutes ago. Reckon there’s nobody around.” His look
sharpens. “Where are you going?” I’ve been taking stealthy steps to the side of
them hoping to edge my way to the bus and safety, but I stop instantly.

“Nowhere,” I say innocently.” I
just need to get on the bus now because I’m getting cold.”

“Reckon you must be - your
nipples are rock hard.” I gasp in shock at his comment and go to march past but
he grabs me and swings me back towards him. “Hey now, I’m just having a little
bit of fun aren’t I Bruno?” His friend seems to be sobering up quickly and is
staring at the man holding me in shock.

“Let me go.” I twist and try to
free my arm but then cry out in pain when he suddenly twists it viciously back
and slams me into him. Up close the alcohol fumes are blinding as is the stench
of cigarettes and body odour. “Let me go,” I shout again and look imploringly
at his friend.

“Rolf, I’m not sure about this.
What are you doing?” his friend slurs hesitantly.

“I’m just having some fun. Relax
you idiot. I just want to let this pretty thing know how much we appreciated
her show tonight. All those tits and legs on show, it’s a shame for her not to
know how appreciated she is.”

“Fuck off,” I shout and getting a
bit of traction I pull my arm out of his ignoring the pain, and raise my knee
attempting to knee him in the balls but hitting him high on his thigh instead.
Letting out a cry of pain he slaps me hard on the face. I’m still reeling from
the pain when he shoves me hard and I cry out as I fall to the ground hitting
my head and feeling the sting of the gravel on my elbows. He moves towards me
and I make a crab scuttle on my back trying to get away but the next minute I
hear a familiar voice.

“What the fuck are you doing?”
roars Sid and then all hell breaks loose as a dark shadow speeds past me
tackling the man to the ground. Sitting up and straddling him Sid pulls him up
by his shirt to face him. “Did you just put your hands on her? Did you just
touch her?
Her
of all people, you fucking wanker. I’m going to fucking
kill you.”

The man is so drunk he smirks.
“Fucking bitch was asking for it,” and then he groans as Sid punches him really
hard. He tries to hit him back but he’s up against 6’ 4” of outraged man and
doesn’t stand a chance, and the air fills with grunts and groans as they strain
against each other and Sid gets in three or four more hard punches to the man’s
kidneys.

“Sid,” I shout and then shriek as
warm arms enclose me from behind.

“Relax,” a warm Irish voice says
in my ear. “It’s just me honey. Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” I say breathlessly.
“It’s Sid I’m worried about. He’s going to kill him.”

“Good.” Bram holds me so that I
can’t get in the way, and watches Sid hit the man with ghoulish fascination.

“Aren’t you going to stop him?”

“Aye in a minute,” he says
calmly. “I can’t stand fucking wankers like him, think they can put their hands
on a fucking girl on her own, against her will. Cunt deserves a good fucking
battering.” His accent is stronger now but I shove him.

“Stop him,” I say wildly, as the
man groans and blood splatters on the pavement. Somewhat reluctantly he moves
forwards.

“Sid, stop now,” he says firmly,
and when Sid pays no attention he reaches in and grasps his closed fist which
is raised to hit the man again. “Mate stop now. Your girl needs you.” Sid
stares over at me, his eyes almost red with rage and panting heavily. “Nell
needs you now mate. Go and comfort her and leave this fucker to me.” Distantly
I notice that the other man, Bruno appears to have run off but then Sid is
rising and coming to me with great strides, his face a mask of anxiety. It’s
only when his arms enclose me and I feel all his wonderful strength and the
smell of him that I realise that I’m crying.

“Ssh, ssh now lovey,” he
whispers. “I’m here now. Everything’s alright. You’re safe.” I cling to him
feeling ridiculous but unable to stop sobbing, and he sways me back and forwards
rubbing his face hard against my hair. We stay like that for a minute and in
the distance I hear Bram talking to the man.

“You piece of shit,” he says
thickly.” I fucking hate cunts like you. Now are you listening to me?” The man
rolls slightly and looks at him. “I’m going to call the police now and report
this but if you say one word about how you got hurt I will find you and finish
it do you understand me?” The man nods and I can see fear in his eyes which to
be honest I can totally understand because Bram at the moment looks a
completely different man from the easy going charmer that he normally is. His
accent is very thick and I hear him say. “If I don’t do it I know men that
will, do you understand?” The man nods painfully and huddles into himself as
Bram walks away. “Get her onto the bus mate,” he says to Sid. “I’ll handle
this.”

Sid nods and then he bends and
swings me into his arms as he strides to the bus. I open my mouth to tell him
that Dave isn’t there but then I hear Dave’s voice and the whoosh of the door
as the bus opens. Leaping up the steps he barks out some sharp voiced commands.

“Get a blanket please Dave and
make her some tea but make sure that you put loads of sugar in it. Then get
Scott to call a doctor. I want one here to look at her immediately. You’d
better get Scott to ring our lawyer as well because the police will be here in
a minute.”

“I’m sorry Sid,” Dave stutters.
“I went looking for her. I didn’t want her running on her own so I thought I’d
keep her in sight but I lost her.”

“It’s okay mate,” Sid says
calmly. “I know what she’s like if you tell her what to do. It’d take a bigger
man than you or I to get her to be sensible.” I want to open my mouth and dispute
this but I’m shaking hard now as shock sets in. We ease into what I see as I
raise my head is a bedroom with a large bed covered in a brown suede comforter.
He lowers me onto the bed and I make a noise protesting the loss of his warmth.
“Ssh, ssh baby,” he whispers. “I just want to have a look at you.”

“Later,” I say in a whisper.
“Please just hold me for a little bit longer.”

“As long as you want brave girl.”
He lowers himself onto the bed drawing me onto his lap and, taking the blanket
that he’s offered by Dave, he wraps it round both of us until we’re in a cocoon
of warmth. I mutter gratefully nestling into his hard body and letting his
scent calm me while people come and go, having murmured conversations with him.
We stay like that for a bit with his hand stroking my hair while he whispers
comforting words of nonsense until eventually the shaking stops. Feeling it he
lowers the blanket revealing my face. “Hey you,” he says with great tenderness.
“There you are. Are you ready to come out because the doctor’s here?”

I’m covered in embarrassment but
he’s brisk now and somehow it melts away my shyness. He moves me into my own
spot on the bed and pushes a mug of tea into my hand and when I make a face at
the sweetness he demurs. “Drink it love. It’s sweet for the shock.” Getting up
he opens the door to the bedroom. “You can come in now. Thanks for seeing her,”
he says and a little man with a huge moustache and a very rumpled suit edges
in. Over his shoulder I see the boys and Mabe all looking worried and then the
door swings shut again. The bedroom’s not huge and with the three of us in here
it’s rather cramped.