Two Days in Biarritz (30 page)

“Then you should let him stay. I want dad to live here with us.”

Annabel ran her slender fingers through her long blonde hair in desperation. She sat down on the bed forcing her son to see her face.

“Sam, I realise how difficult this must be for you, and the girls.”

“No you do not,” he said moving his gaze up until his eye’s met hers. “You have no idea what it’s like for me. I don’t want to live here. I want to be with Dad.”

Annabel felt as if she had been stabbed. She was upset by Sam’s reaction. He had never been outwardly affectionate with his father and neither had Colin been with him. She wasn’t prepared for this outburst.

Sam’s young eyes widened until trickles of tears became visible at the edges. He was a vulnerable small boy and for an instant Annabel saw her son as a four-year-old rather than an eleven-year-old. She felt like she had really let him down. It was only natural that he wanted his father to live at home. It was where he should be. But Annabel wondered if she would have been able to live with herself if she had let Colin stay.

“Sam, you will still be able to see Daddy whenever you want.”

“Well I want to live with him and he said I could.”

This was bizarre. She knew that Colin was staying in the Jury’s Hotel next to the IFSC. It was certainly not suitable for a young boy. Even though it was only temporary Colin had said that he would take an apartment in the city centre until he decided what he was going to do and it was absolutely unfair of him to give the lad a false hope that he could go and live with him. Sam’s school and life was in Howth and his home should be with his mother and sisters. The girls had sobbed and cried themselves to sleep for the past two nights but both were clear that they wanted to stay at home with their mother.

“I don’t know what to say Sam,” Annabel said gently.

“It’s nothing to do with you. This is between me and dad.”

He was his father’s son alright. Maybe she had sent him to too many rugby camps. The thought of losing her son was a huge price to pay for her freedom and something she hadn’t thought about.

“We can discuss this again when daddy gets somewhere permanent to live.”

Sam shrugged. “Okay, but I’ve made my mind up.”

There was no point talking to him. He was a confused little eleven-year-old boy.

She leaned forward and kissed his forehead but he showed no reaction.

“Girls are you ready?”

Her daughters appeared from their bedrooms, they were pleased to be spending the day with Meave Jenkins and her family.

“Well be back by
four o’clock,” she called to Sam, as she closed the front door but he didn’t reply.

* * *

Dee reached Greenfield Close more quickly than Kate anticipated. She felt relief as her aunt’s smiling face appeared at the front door – her resemblance to her mother soothed her.

“Thanks for coming
Dee.”

“Sweet Kate, how are you doing?” she said leaning forward to give her niece a kiss on the cheek.

“I’ve been better. Do you want a cup of tea?”

“I’ve given it up but I’ll have a cup of boiled water.”

Kate ushered her aunt into the kitchen and put the kettle on. Dee took a seat and watched Kate as she buzzed around like Betty used to.

“How’s Damien?”

“He’s doing fine. Even though we had some time to prepare for mum’s death we are still in shock and miss her terribly now that she’s actually gone.”

Dee
nodded her head sympathetically. “How is the clean out going?”

Kate paused. She felt deceitful talking about her mother’s private life but she had left her with no choice. She filled a mug with boiling water and placed it down in front of her aunt then made herself a mug of coffee.

“It’s something you never imagine doing in your wildest dreams, even though I secretly looked in her wardrobe as a child I felt as if she would pounce upon me at any moment. Now that I have to sort them out it feels like a terrible invasion of privacy.”

Dee
nodded her head – her offers of help had been rightly turned down. This was a job only Kate could do alone.

“
Dee, have you ever heard of someone called Liam?”

Dee
gazed into her mug of water. She hadn’t heard him mentioned in years.

“Why do you ask?”

“I found a pile of letters that he wrote to mum. They were writing to each other for over fifteen years. I think they had an affair.”

Dee
gulped bag the piping hot water– burning her mouth. “But he went to live in Australia.”

“He came home at least once and she met up with him. Did you know him well?”

“If it’s the same Liam, and I’m sure it is, Betty went out with him for a year or more when she was in college. I was still in school at the time but remember him visiting our house. I thought he was gorgeous – I think all little sisters feel that way about their older sister’s boyfriends.”

Kate’s face lightened. Maybe now she would get the answers that she wanted. “Were they very much in love?”

Dee took a sip from her cup and nodded her head frantically. “Oh, very much. He was always in our house and my mother was convinced that they would get engaged. The whole family was shocked when they broke up.”

“Why did they break up?” Kate asked urgently.

Dee paused for a moment on realising this story might come as a shock to her niece. It was a pity that her sister had never confided in her daughter before this.

“This shouldn’t be coming from me, love…” she hesitated. “I guess you need to know though.”

“Tell me Dee, I need to know.”

Dee
looked down at her cup. “You’re mum got pregnant by his best friend.”

The penny dropped. “Dad?”

Dee nodded.

Kate shook her head in amazement. “That must have been a scandal back then.”

“You’d better believe it. It would still be a scandal today!”

“So Liam ran off to
Australia with a broken heart?”

“As far as I am aware. I had no idea that he got back in touch with your mum.”

Kate rubbed her index finger over her right eyebrow comfortingly. She was truly beginning to regret giving her father such a harsh time while her mother was ill. Her father’s relationship with Annabel had been less scandalous in many ways than her mother’s with Liam.

“It’s strange to think of her having this lover all this time.”

“Well, he was really more of fantasy don’t you think?” Dee tilted her head. “I’m surprised myself that she carried out a long distance romance. When did the letters stop?”

“
1996.”

“I wonder why!”
Dee drained the last drop from her cup.

Kate nodded. “I read a few of them but I feel like I’m invading her privacy when I open them. I was hoping you would be able to tell me more.”

“I’m sorry,” Dee said with a shake of her head. “I wish I could be more help. I’m as surprised as you were to find out she got back in touch with him.”

“I guess it’s a secret she’ll take with her.”

“I wonder why she didn’t destroy them. She must have known that you would find them.”

“Yes and what is more, she was insistent that I cleaned her drawers out.”

Dee nodded slowly. “So, she wanted you to read them, Kate. She wanted you to know the story but probably hadn’t the courage to tell you herself.”

Kate nodded silently.

Dee glanced at her watch. “Now I really must go and take this old boot to the hairdressers.”

Kate stood up and cleared the mugs from the table.

“I’m going back to France tomorrow. Maybe you will come visit me before the year is out.”

“I’d love that. I might come on my own and we can have a nice girlie time. You’ve been through the mill with your divorce and everything else – you deserve a run of good luck now.”

Kate trusted her aunt and she longed to tell her about the baby growing inside her.

“I …”

“Yes, Kate?”

“Nothing, I’m doing fine
Dee.”

“Well, just don’t be too brave and remember to call me if you need anything at all!”

Kate hugged her aunt warmly then showed her to the hall door.

“Thanks again for coming.”

“If you like I can do a bit of detective work for you – see if my brothers know anything about Liam.”

“Maybe, but don’t make it too obvious.”

Dee nodded. “Whatever you think.”

Kate waved goodbye vigorously to her aunt as she drove away. She would have one last look at the letters and then decide whether to destroy them or not. She ran up to the bottom drawer again and took out the second and larger bundle. She settled down on the floor resting her back against the side of the bed. The last letter he wrote to her was dog-eared and grubby. It looked as though it had been read and reread several times.

Dear Beth

I am missing you so much. I thought it would be enough just knowing that you are there and thinking of me but it isn’t anymore. I am so unhappy.

I made the biggest mistake of my life leaving you and you know how much I’ve regretted it but we are not getting any younger. I have told Carrie that I am leaving her. I never really loved her the way a husband should love his wife. Please Betty I am begging you to consider leaving Damien. I will come back to
Ireland or you can come to Australia. I will be happy anywhere as long as we are together. Time is running out for us Betty. Please let me know your answer when I ring on Sunday.

All my love always

Liam x

Betty’s reply was sealed and stamped with return to sender all over the front of it. With trembling fingers she started to tear at the gummed envelope. The paper inside was pristine as if it had been written only the day before.

My Love

I didn’t answer your call on Sunday because I need to write these words down. You know how I feel about you, how I’ve always felt about you
, but your life is in Australia. I can’t leave Damien now. He was the one who stood by me and has given me and the children a good life. Don’t think I haven’t thought seriously about your proposition – in my heart you are the one I truly want to be with. But I think we would upset too many people. I don’t think I could tell Kate the truth and she would find out if we were to be together. Please believe me when I tell you how much it hurts to tell you my decision. Don’t stop writing or phoning. I need to know that we can still be in touch

Forever yours

Beth xxx

Kate felt a salty tear trickle down her cheek and stop at the corner of her mouth. What secret did her mother want to keep from her? She desperately wanted to know what happened next. Betty had betrayed her husband for so long. She had been living a double life with her heart on the other side of the world.

“What are they?” a voice asked from behind, making Kate jump.

Kate felt like a rabbit looking down the barrel of a shot gun.

“Dad, I eh, it’s just some stuff of mums.”

Kate floundered around, fixing the letters back into a neat pile.

Damien spotted the Australian stamp. He knew they could only be from one person. It was careless of Betty to leave letters around but they were probably not high on her agenda for the last few weeks. He was surprised to see so many. Surely they weren’t all from Liam. He had suspected that they may have been in touch once or twice but this looked suspect.

“Are they all from the same person?” He was anxious to find out how much she knew.

“I don’t know, I haven’t read them,” she lied. “I think it’s probably best to burn them,”

Damien said nothing. He certainly didn’t want to read their contents but wanted to know what Kate had learned from reading them.

“Kate.” Damien braced himself before continuing. “Are they from someone called Liam?”

Kate was startled. “Yes,” slipped meekly out from between her lips.

Damien sat down on the double bed that he had shared with his wife for the best part of forty years. He put his elbows on his knees and sunk his head into his hands. There was no right time to tell Kate the truth. Now was as good as any.

“Kate, there’s something you should know.”

“I know already Dad,” she interrupted.

“What do you know?” He lifted his head in surprise.

Kate moved forward on her hunkers and held her hand out until it rested on her father’s knee. There was no easy way to tell him that she knew.

“That you got mum pregnant before you were married. She was on the rebound from your best friend.”

Damien froze. This wasn’t close to what he had to say to her.

“Who told you that?”

“
Dee.”