Ultimate Baseball Road Trip (100 page)
Read Ultimate Baseball Road Trip Online
Authors: Josh Pahigian,Kevin O’Connell
SEATING TIP
On a per game basis, the Premium Infield seats sell for between $80 and $90, depending on the quality of the Rangers’ opponent. For us, that’s bumping into the upper range of our feasibility range. However, season-ticket holders purchase tickets at a steeply discounted rate in Texas. For example, Premium Infield seats only cost $50 apiece for those ten-gallon hat wearing Texans willing to sign up for all eighty-one games. As a result, if you can find a season-ticket holder selling his seat on eBay or Craigslist, chances are he’ll be asking considerably less than the box office’s price for a comparable seat.
Josh:
I don’t care if he’s a season-ticket holder or not, if some clown sits in front of me wearing a ten-gallon hat, I’m asking him to take it off.
Kevin:
Because you wouldn’t be able to see the game?
Josh:
No, because this is a
baseball game,
not a rodeo. And because I wouldn’t be able to see.
The full bench bleachers were brought over from Arlington Stadium (they had plenty) and put to use at Rangers Ballpark. If you can get into the lower rows you may be mildly satisfied as upper seats don’t allow a view of the outfield corners.
CLUB INFIELD (SECTIONS 222–230)
Sure these are great just-above-the-plate seats. But do you really need to be pampered, coddled, and have your hand held? We’ve said it before and we’ll say it again: real fans sit down near the field, not up where people have one eye on the game and the other on the price of oil futures.
Overheard in this section: “The firm who ‘comped’ me these seats can’t afford the Club Infield.” Also overheard in Sections 217 and 235: “Did anyone else notice the seats one section over are half the price?”
Josh:
You made that up about the guy in the suit complaining.
Kevin:
Maybe, but if I was a corporate shmuck and they stuck me out here, that’s what I’d say.
Josh:
Trust me, you’ll never be a corporate shmuck.
Kevin:
Hey, thanks!
The seats in the Club Terrace are closer to the field of play than the Club Infield seats, even if they’re down the lines, while the Club Infield seats are, well, on the infield. This can be attributed to the design of the decks. But that still doesn’t make these great seats. Sections 213–216 on the left side are the pick of this somewhat attractive litter. Sections 201–209 in deep left-field home run territory are the worst.
Almost every seat will have some kind of obstruction from the poles, which support the roof. But then again, you get to shout “incoming” when Josh Hamilton launches his latest torpedo. And, really, the support poles are relatively narrow. If you lean a little you can see any play. These seats are far better than anything on the Upper Level even if a large part of the right-field wall is lost to the underhang. As an added attraction, and so they can charge more for these seats than they used to, the Rangers have made this part of the park an all-you-can-eat section. Here’s the menu, direct from the Rangers’ website:
“Each ticket includes all you can eat grilled chicken sandwiches, hot dogs, nachos, peanuts, popcorn, and soft drinks, served in the air-conditioned grill behind Upper HomeRun Porch. Food service begins when the ballpark gates open and ends two hours after the scheduled game time.”
UPPER BOX (SECTIONS 316–335) AND UPPER RESERVED (SECTIONS 301–338)
The lower seats in Sections 316 to 335 are the Upper Boxes. These are okay, but not great. As for the Upper Reserved, we don’t know who they would be reserved for, as they are fairly horrible. These seats are distant and windblown. The Rangers have done a few crazy things with the upper deck to make it one of the farthest from the action in baseball. The Club deck is hung a bit over the first-level bowl, but the third deck is pushed back behind the second deck. And with the Press level also in between, these seats are in the upper stratosphere. The sky at night sure is big and bright (deep in the heart of Texas) from this level. We found the nearest outfield corner obscured from view by the faulty design in many of these sections too. In Section 301 you can’t see the left-field wall or corner at all, and a huge chunk of center field is blocked by the white steel facade of the building. Sitting in Sections 302 to 305 (unless you’re in the first three rows) will also prevent you from seeing the wall and corner. In Sections 306 to 312 the wall becomes visible but the corner is still blocked. Sit in the lower seats of Sections 316 and 317 for the best value in the upper deck.
There’s no way around it: These seats stink. To qualify the level of sucky-ness, we would only pay Confederate money for these seats. Only Section 339 is clear of the underhang issues that plague this deep-right-field portion of the upper deck.
Rangers Ballpark is surrounded by plenty of parking in the stadium lots. Whether your pregame ritual includes a picnic by a man-made lake, or a ride on a roller coaster at Six Flags, the baseball game still takes center stage to anything you might do beforehand. This isn’t Wrigleyville or even a tailgate-friendly scene, but at least it isn’t a giant field of concrete and asphalt deep in the heart of Texas. The Rangers obviously made a priority of creating around their park a lush green oasis and the effort they went to should be applauded.
Most Rangers fans drive to the game owing to the lack of a centralized mass transit system in Arlington. That said, the no-fare trolley, which stops at many of the hotels in town, does service Rangers Ballpark. And did we mention it’s free? If you’re staying at the Days Inn Six Flags, you’ll be within walking distance of the ballpark, but otherwise look for a hotel that boasts a trolley stop on its grounds. For those swooping into Arlington and then swooping out—perhaps staying overnight in the livelier hub of Dallas—driving is pretty easy owing to the park’s placement right off Interstate 30. From Fort Worth take Interstate 30 east to the Nolan Ryan Expressway exit. Follow the Ryan Express to Randol Mill Road and turn left. From Dallas take Interstate 30 west and exit at Ballpark Way south. The different parking areas are lettered, with each letter representing a famous Texan. For example, the “A” lot is called the “Stephen F. Austin” lot, while the “H” lot belongs to Sam Houston. A parking spot in these team lots cost $10.
Arlington Trolley:
www.arlingtontrolley.com/ATTRACTIONS/tabid/56/Default.aspx
RANGERS WALK OF FAME
Along the north and west sides of Rangers Ballpark brick panels are laid into the walkway featuring the rosters of each Rangers club since 1972, the year the Senators moved to Texas. There are special markers for Gold Glove Award winners like Ivan Rodriguez and MVPs like Juan Gonzalez, and for other various award winners. We were amazed to learn that the second-winningest Rangers edition ever didn’t even make the playoffs. That’s right, the 1977 team overcame a slow start to finish a franchise-best 94-68 but finished in second place. They missed the playoffs by eight games, owing to the Kansas City Royals’ stellar 102-60 campaign. That Texas team caught lightning in a bottle after skipper Frank Lucchesi was supplanted by Billy Hunter. Under Hunter, the team went 60-33 but it wasn’t enough to catch the Royals. By way of comparison, the World Series Rangers of 2010 only won ninety regular season games and the World Series team of 2011 only won ninety-six.
For a price, fans can have their names etched in brick too, beside the year of their choosing. Each panel is made of 2,600 bricks. Josh counted, while Kevin fibbed to passersby, asking them to steer clear of the walkway so Josh could find his “contact lens.”
Kevin:
Why don’t you just multiply the number of bricks in the length by the width?
Josh:
Trust me, my method is
way
more accurate.
A kid-sized ballpark resides north of the big league stadium, on the far side of a little lake. A replica of Rangers Ballpark, this little yard is available for rental. Complete with a P.A. system, lights, decorative steel, and a scoreboard, it is also used for Rangers instructional camps and baseball clinics. The little guys’ yard closes an hour prior to each home game. Not far away, the North Lawn provides a great spot for a picnic.
Baseball Vernacular
One thing we learned while visiting Arlington was the origin of the term “Texas Leaguer.” A Texas Leaguer, of course, is baseball-speak for a blooper that lands out of reach of the infielders, but too shallow for the outfielders to catch. Because the sun-baked fields of the Texas League were very fast (to borrow a golf term), outfielders would play deeper than normal throughout the minor league circuit so as to prevent balls from shooting up the gaps. As a result, many lightly-struck balls fell in for singles. Today the idiosyncratic term has become common baseball lingo, as familiar as “Baltimore Chop” or “Can of Corn.”
Follow Randol Mill Road two Texas-sized blocks west of the park and before you know it you’ll be standing in the shadows of the most immense dome known to North American sports fans, or fans on any continent, for that matter.
Josh:
It kind of looks like a giant football.
Kevin:
I think that’s by design.
Josh:
You see it too?
Kevin:
Well, now that you mention it.
The Cowboys offer fans the opportunity to partake in a variety of different tour options, ranging from a self-guided
tour to an audio-device directed tour to a tour focused on the facility’s rich collection of art (and you probably thought Jerry Jones didn’t have much interest in art!). To learn more, visit:
http://stadium.dallascowboys.com/tours/tourInfo.cfm
.
www.sixflags.com/overTexas/index.aspx
What can we say about this expansive amusement park that hasn’t been said before. Really, what can we say? We have no idea. We’re ballpark buffs, not roller coaster experts. Given the proximity of the amusement park to the ballpark, though, it would seem like a good side-destination for those road tripping with the kiddoes in tow.
While the pregame eating and drinking options offer little in the way of local character, on the plus side there are several chain restaurants within a mile or so of the baseball and football complex. So at least you know what you’re getting. If you do a loop around the ballpark and Cowboys Stadium you will likely find an acceptable but not-too-exciting spot for a pregame lunch or beverage. We will stop short of “reviewing” all of these familiar chains, but we will list them here so you won’t settle for your fourth-least favorite chain, when you might have enjoyed a burger at your third-least favorite instead if you’d driven a block farther.
Just west of the park, a drive down North Collins will reveal Chili’s, Hooters, TGI Fridays, Chik-fil-A, Country Kitchen, Panera, Buffalo Wild Wings, Arby’s, Taco Bell, Panda Express, Subway, Popeye’s Chicken, and plenty of other quickie spots. For our money, Buffalo Wild Wings is the pick of this litter.
Josh:
“Chains on North Collins Street” would be an apropos name for a bike shop.
Kevin:
Yeah, or a kinky sex club.
700 Six Flags Dr.
www.humperdinks.com/locations/arlington/
This local chain tries to be all things to all people. A sports bar with many TVs, a brew pub with its own handcrafted brews on tap, and a family restaurant. In a land where chain restaurants are king, we think Humperdinks succeeds. Being only eight blocks from the park, this may be your one-stop-shopping place for pregame and postgame entertainment. The menu features everything from burgers to calzones to seafood and steak to Tex-Mex and Cajun. A full list of national beer and wines is available, plus a selection of home brewed micros. Josh sampled a Texas Blonde, while Kevin enjoyed a Total Disorder Porter. Humperdinks boasts the tallest barroom ceiling in Texas, which we guess is worth something.
812 Six Flags Drive
www.3rdbasesportsbarandgrill.com/index.html
This sports bar boasts good food and a roster of attractive young ladies who like to dress up in kinky little outfits for the pleasure of their male guests. Kevin likened it to Hooters without the corporate consideration that requires some semblance of political correctness and decorum. Check out the PG-13 rated photo gallery on their website and you’ll see what we mean.