Unbind (28 page)

I had no idea where we were, not really. Loud music came from every direction and as soon as I shut my door, Cai locked the vehicle and held out his arm. I slipped into his embrace, slotting against his body. He wore a dress shirt and pants and me, I wore a black jumpsuit with a halter neck and skyscraper heels that almost put me taller than him.

We sauntered from the alley out onto a more populated street and swiftly, he took me into a dark entranceway, then down below ground into some sort of dingy club.

We were welcomed in without a word so the doormen obviously knew Cai—and I just went with the flow. We were taken to a booth on an upper level and asked if we wanted drinks. I ordered a dirty martini and he asked for a light beer.

Everything was velvet; semicircular booths, walls, the stage even. The chandeliers made it seem more upmarket but for some reason, this seemed to be more a place for its entertainment or food. Some of the mahogany tables and chairs on the floor below were upholstered in gold, buttoned leather.

“Where are we?” I asked when we were alone.

“Someplace I knew you’d like,” he told me.

“Okay,” I smirked.

It was plush inside the establishment even though it seemed kind of underground. There was no awning out front like there was with most clubs.

We were given menus and a few seconds to order, after being told by a scantily dressed waitress, “Show starts in ten.”

I quickly found a gumbo dish and pointed to that, asking they forget the side of dipping bread. Cai ordered a 16oz steak with all the trimmings and smiled at the waitress with his white teeth shining. He tipped his head when she asked if he wanted the drinks to keep coming.

I didn’t have time to speak to him again before the lights were dimmed and the show began. It dawned then.

Burlesque.

Oh my.

Two ladies sashayed from the dark recesses of the stage, silk robes tied lazily at the waist and feather boas draped around their necks. They wore their hair in pretty ringlets framing their faces, braids and swirls at the back. The music was sultry and seductive, and Cai moved to my side so our thighs touched. I felt him curl his hand around mine on my lap but I was so engrossed in the show, so expectant.

The ladies produced canes to dance around and did so in their cute little kitten heels, gradually removing their clothes piece by piece to continue the seduction. I was astonished to realise there were as many men in the audience as women, and some were pretty beautiful themselves.

I wanted to turn and kiss Cai but that’s when our food arrived. We separated a touch so we wouldn’t knock elbows and while he carved his steak like a pro, I took a spoon and fed myself the gumbo. I was totally engrossed as the duo up front were joined by another four ladies, all dressed in little more than stockings, heels, thongs and nipple tassels. Their hair and make-up was a work of art in itself. Many other couples like us were eating, not put off at all by the display of naked flesh only yards away.

The women onstage really got into it, throwing each other backward and forward in a display of continual frisson. Never kissing or caressing, just mimicking what they might do if alone. Their bodies… so unashamed and free. They simultaneously cat-walked that bad-boy stage and I was in awe. A Madam came out at the end and spanked them all for their bad behaviour, and then, she stripped off to reveal the most beautiful, enormous breasts I had ever seen. Men and women in the crowd wolf-whistled to her tune as she let the other ladies know who was boss.

The show finished before we had polished off our food and I looked sideways to see Cai, still feasting. When the music went down, I turned and asked, “You like this place?”

“Got great food.” He winked and swept a kiss over my cheek.

I raised an eyebrow, wishing I had asked for the bread. There was a ton of gorgeous sauce at the bottom of my dish, waiting for my tongue.

“Why else?” I pressed him.

“I dunno… just wanted to see your reaction.” His brow raised and he pulled both lips inside his mouth.

I sank in my seat and was pleased when the MC switched on some ordinary tunes to drown out our conversation.

He seemed to be alluding to the games Klaus and I used to play, because everyone knew Klaus liked the kinkier side of tricks. Including taking his women to burlesque, just like this.

“You could’ve just asked me.”

“You said you were just friends,” he argued. “Clearly… you weren’t.”

“He… okay. We never had sex. We
were
just friends. Still are. We did fool around. That was all. I swear.”

I couldn’t take it if Cai turned out to be the horrible, jealous type. It wasn’t for me—always having to answer for myself.

Cai appeared as though he wanted to hit something, really hard! I’d seen a punch bag lurking in the corner of his ‘gallery’ and was about to suggest he braced his fists until we got home.

“He didn’t have his fucking cock in you?” He ground out.

“Never,” I replied instantly. “I swear. Anyway you’re the only man I ever let come in me. You’re the only man for me, Cai.”

He took several deep breaths. “Okay.”

“Look, I didn’t like whipping him. I tried it… only once. I don’t really go for it, not really. I mean this… those women on stage… I appreciate that they enjoy it, you know? I used to be up for new things… I tried new things because nothing really worked for me, but that was before—” I shut myself off.

He turned to me, eyeing me closely, still breathing harshly. “Before what?”

“Before… I didn’t know that this kind of thing existed. What we have, I mean. It must have been a moment of weakness that I let you in… I never knew I was lonely, not until you showed me I had been.”

He studied me, trying to gauge whether he could trust my words. I waited for a response, but it never came.

He nodded to the waitress and she dropped off the bill, even though our second round of drinks was barely done with. I tried to guzzle some more but he was already standing, holding out his hand for me to take.

He helped me out of the booth and held his arm around my waist while we waited for his credit card to be put through at the desk. He walked me away and out of there, back down the street and toward the alley we’d hidden the car on.

He opened my door and waited for me to get in but I didn’t. A thought occurred to me that made me stop and think.

“This is my last night and you,” I hesitated, looking anywhere but at him, “you take me to that fucking club. As what? A test?”

He leaned back against the car. His jaw ticked and he pressed his lips together as if he couldn’t physically say what was on the tip of his tongue.

“Cai! This isn’t fair and you know it. I don’t ask you about your sexual history. If I did I’m sure I’d find out the real reason why you propagate that gay rumour.”

He folded his arms, avoiding my wrath. He was ticked off alright.

“You think I’m a slut?” I poked his shoulder and scowled, almost slapping him. Heat rose in my cheeks as I burned with anger. He did, didn’t he? I tapped my feet on the sidewalk and stood waiting for an explanation.

“I do not think you’re a slut,” he said, his eyes still down. “I have a self-esteem problem, okay? How do I know I’m any good for you?”

“What?” I narrowed my eyes. Hadn’t we been over that?

“You took my virginity, Chloe,” he spat out, grunting with self-disgust.

“You’re really good… I meant it when I said I… how has this happened? I don’t—” I stopped myself babbling.

He hid behind his hands before revealing, “I’m like a fucking chick… I just read like a ton of mucky books to try and understand and I—”

“Oh my god, I love you,” I giggled and he managed a smile.

“You make it so easy, Chloe. The way you hold me… it’s so easy being with you. How do I know… how do I know if I haven’t…”

“…got anything to compare it with?”

“Yeah.”

“At any point, has any of this felt wrong or uncomfortable or anything less than right?”

“No,” he admitted, his arms wrapped around his head. “Never.”

“Then there’s your answer because believe me, nine times out of ten I felt like that when I was with other guys. Like I knew in the back of my mind I wasn’t seeking something worthy of me and I knew it.”

The way he looked up at me under his slumped shoulders made me move. His eyes and the way they sparkled… got me bad.

Our bodies crashed and my arms wrapped tightly around his head. He was pressed up against the Mustang, his hands on my back, on my arse, and he raised my thigh to rest up around his body. I rocked into his groin and pulled on his hair. Our hot tongues pressed and swirled and I pulled back from him, breathless and high. I was panting and so was he.

“I think you need to take me home.”

I stared at his moist, pink lips and yearned for more, for us to be intimate in several different ways. He was an incredible kisser—not one of those guys who overpowered a woman or slobbered. Cai stroked and licked gently.

He moved back into my body to stroke his tongue against my throat. I couldn’t help but moan and throw my head back. The bastard went right on and Frenched my throat all over, stopping himself when his tongue reached the very top of my cleavage.

“Jesus. You were the hottest woman in there tonight. Of any night. I mean it—’

“I want you—’

“Tell me we can make this work,” he begged.

“I sat on a plane for you. Damn it.” I glared and he smirked.

IN BED SOMETIME later, as we laid side by side staring at one another, I told Cai all about my sexual conquests. I lost my virginity when I was 19, the year a lot of bad stuff happened to me. I’d been saving myself for a guy I’d been seeing since Sixth Form but we lost touch after what happened with Amanda (something about the whole situation being too heavy for him). So I chose some random for my first time, a guy I didn’t care about and I only did it with because I wanted to lose my virginity. It didn’t hurt like everyone warned me, I didn’t feel the earth move, and I didn’t have a single orgasm nor anything relating to that. I think my first orgasm was when I was 24 and it was self-administered. I told Cai I’d gotten addicted to battery-operated devices but it had made me so unyielding that I couldn’t have an orgasm with a man so I stopped using them.

I wasn’t entirely certain if the number of lovers I’d had was 33 or 34. There was one night where I was too drunk to remember. Anyway, I knew someone had slept in my bed with me because I could smell him on the pillow when I woke up. I couldn’t remember if we’d even had sex or if he had used a condom. I went and got myself checked out a few days later—it was one of the worst times of my life and I never got so wasted ever again. Thankfully I hadn’t gotten pregnant or caught an STD.

I told Cai that I didn’t class Klaus in that bracket. He was just someone I let pleasure me. I also mentioned the thing at the Belgravia house, just so that it was out there and not hanging over us. I made sure Cai knew that I had categorically turned down Klaus and kicked him out after he walked in on me in the bath. Cai seemed angry but he let it slide for some reason. I sensed this man was used to being all cloak and dagger, hiding behind mysteries to keep from revealing his true self.

In Sheffield I often used to take my exercise at the ski village. Since I was too afraid to fly, it was the closest I would allow myself to get to the piste. I’d always loved skating and I was good at skiing too. I met a couple of guys there, I admitted. Cai laughed with me as I told him about the snowboarder who threw his back out while fucking me. That was funny—on his knees behind me with not a chance of being able to move or dress himself. The paramedics lifted him onto a stretcher with a sheet wrapped around his hips! Cai called me badass as I admitted I laughed my head off, even as the guy was being carried off out of my flat!

There was one guy I picked up on a night out, only for him to pass out in my bathroom. I called a friend of his to come and pick him up after I scrolled through his phone, only for this friend to turn up and turn out to be a babe. We locked the drunken ass in my bathroom and me and the other guy had some fun that night, all night in fact. Pity he admitted in the morning that he had a girlfriend, otherwise he’d really be interested in seeing me. That didn’t exactly make me feel great but he’d never mentioned a girlfriend until after the deed was done.

I’d never mixed business with pleasure, not until Klaus, not until Cai. A lot of the guys at the
Telegraph
had tried it on. I’d be worried if they didn’t, really. I just couldn’t be bothered with anyone I’d have to see again.

I told Cai I’d been with guys who were big, small, medium. I said some of the smaller ones tried harder and were better lovers. I told him the longest I’d kept anything going with anyone was six months. That was the sandwich guy down the road from the Sheffield office. I met him round the back alley nearly every lunchtime, until he said he was going back home to Cornwall to work on the fishing boats instead. It wasn’t a pity, just a shame. He was really adept at making me come within just a few minutes. Cai asked me if there had ever been any girls and the look on his face was hopeful, but I had to disappoint him. I did however admit that I’d once watched Rob screwing Kay from behind. That was once when I was visiting her flat and he turned up in the middle of the night, despite knowing full well I’d be there. She made him promise to be quiet because I was only feet away but he’d made a bit of a racket and I’d woken up. I know he saw me watching and it disgusted me a little. Still, I told Cai about the size of his cock and wondered whether that was all that kept Kay coming back for more.