Unsettled (Chosen #1) (10 page)

Fifteen

Hurl

When we made it to the game, we
were already late. Of course, there was a pub on the sidelines so Teagan and I headed in alone and sat at a table for two. He watched the game from the window while I checked out the rest of the pub. There were hardly any women and I felt completely out of place. It was like Ireland suddenly transported itself to a place in Boston. So many of the patrons had thick Irish accents, like Teagan, but I could tell they weren’t from the same location in Ireland. I recalled how everyone commented on my accent in Oregon at first.

I looked at Teagan and saw him smiling out the window. I relaxed back into my chair
, and as I sipped my beer, I took in his rugby shirt and the fine lines of his face. He was at peace. I saw joy. I stared at him for a long moment, and when he glanced up, I looked at him questioningly.

“What is it, babe?”
he asked.

“I want to know if you have a large family. I mean, I know you talk to your mom every week and I think I
’ve heard you talk to your sister, but how many kids are in your family?” I asked.

Teagan clearly tensed. I d
idn’t know why. It was a common question that most people asked on their first date, not almost six weeks into a friendship or whatever the hell we had.

He cleared his throat
. “I have three brothers and two sisters. We aren’t very close. I have a sister that is close in age, so she’s great but my brother, William, is my favorite,” he said with a smile.

I sat there
, not saying anything, but nodding at his answer. I waited for him to say more but he didn’t. He just looked back out to the field, and obviously someone had done something exciting because the whole pub erupted in cheers and slaps. I stayed in my chair and fingered the top of my bottle. When it quieted down, Teagan went to get us more drinks and we headed out to the bleachers to sit with his friends. There were beautiful men everywhere. The bleachers were filled with so much testosterone, I couldn’t think straight. I couldn’t even watch the game. I just watched the gorgeous men as they reacted to the game. I offered to become the gopher girl for drinks. Teagan handed me a bunch of bills and I shot off to the pub to grab a few more pints. When I made it to the bartender, he looked at me with a smile.

“Well, you
’re a sight for sore eyes,” he said.

“Because I
’m the only female in this entire place?” I asked, laughing. I ordered two beers and he handed me a shot of something too.

I eyed hi
m quizzically, and I nodded a thank you before taking the shot.

Every time I went to the bleachers, it became obvious that someone else needed a beer so I happily
went back and forth to the pub. Every single time, the bartender gave me a free shot. The hair of the dog was making the previous night’s hangover go away. I loved two day benders. Two hours later, I was so drunk, and the last shot he gave me had a napkin with his number on it. A hand came up behind me and took the napkin from my grasp.

I turned around and saw
a very angry Teagan. Again. I smiled at him and took the napkin and tossed it back to the bartender.

“Sorry,” I said
. “I have a date tonight.” The bartender pouted out his lip and I laughed.

Teagan grabbed my hand and led me out to the parking lot, plopping me in the back seat of the car. When he got in the car, he looked over at me with an amused smile. “Had a good time, baby?” he asked.

“The best hurling game I’ve ever watched!” I laughed.  I was so wasted that when the other guys in the car laughed about something, I only rolled my eyes over in a haze, trying to catch up with what they were saying. It wasn’t any use. My head felt heavy so I laid it down in Teagan’s lap and he immediately combed his fingers through my hair while he continued to talk to his friends.

“Are you gonna fuck me when we get home?” I asked seriously.

He immediately looked down at me and his jaw dropped. Then, the laughter began. They were laughing so hard, I had to pull my head out of his lap because the shaking was making me sick. He pulled me tightly against him and kissed my forehead.

“Yes, love. You
’ll have whatever you want,” he whispered in my ear.

Love? Did he just call me love? What a solid endearment for a summer fling. I smiled up to him and snuggled into his neck. At that point, I knew I loved Teagan. I loved him. But fuck it all to hell. Th
at wasn’t supposed to happen. But was it? We did start off casual, but now he was being possessive and caring. He was even calling me love. Maybe it wasn’t so casual. Pushing the thought to the back of my head, I closed my eyes and blackness swept over me.

I woke up in a dark room with Teagan’s hands wrapped around me. Saliva was pouring out of my mouth and I had to move. But I was stuck. My stomach started to come up my throat and I instantly pushed myself up, despite the dizziness
, and stumbled frantically to the bathroom. The lid wasn’t even up before everything came out. I could feel Teagan behind me, kneeling down, and then his hand started to rub up and down my back.

“No. Go. Away
,” I cried. Tears were streaming down my face and mixing in with the vomit coming out of my mouth. I couldn’t let him see me like that. I was so embarrassed.

“No, baby, you
’re sick. Let me take care of you,” he said in the softest voice.

He got up
for a minute to get a warm washcloth and put it on the back of my neck. He continued to rub my back with one hand while he held my hair back with the other. When I turned to look at him, I could see he already had vomit on one of his hands. He smiled at me and gave me an endearing nod. That is when I got violently sick again. Good God. I thought I was going to die in that bathroom. I purged everything out and immediately put my face on the toilet, not caring that five guys put their asses there every single day. I laid there until I was consumed by sleep. I awoke to Teagan stripping off my clothes and gently putting me in the tub.

He had already drawn a bath for me and even put bubbles in it. He took off his boxers and got in behind me. He immediately
rubbed the washcloth over me, cleaning every part of my body. He washed my hair with a cup and whispered sweet things to me about feeling better. He said everything would be better in the morning. When he was done, he put his hands around my waist and we stayed there until the water got cold. He dried me off and put me in one of his shirts then led me back to the bed where he caressed my wet hair until I finally fell asleep for the last time that night.

When I woke up, I heard noises coming from the kitchen. I looked over at the alarm clock and saw that it was
ten thirty. Fuck. I missed my English class. Again. As I sat there and tried to figure out how many classes I’d missed, Teagan came through the door with a tray of eggs and toast.

“What are you doing here?” I asked
, startled.

“I called in
sick to work today. I was really worried about you, Lizzie. You were so drunk last night and I didn’t want to leave you alone today,” he said with concern.

I looked at him with a surprised smile. He placed the tray on my lap and told me to eat. I watched him as he sat at the end of the bed with a worn blue t
-shirt and jeans. I took in my appearance. As I started to eat, he pulled my feet from underneath the covers and started to massage them. I groaned in delight and my head fell back to the wall.

“You didn’t have to do this, Te
ag,” I said. “Work is more important and you could have just called to check on me.”

“I know
but I needed to do this. I didn’t realize how much you drank at the game,” he said with a slight smile.

“I know, I know. I missed school this morning. I never should have taken so many shots.
God, I’m so embarrassed. I feel like an asshole,” I said.

“Don’t say that
, babe. We’re going to take it easy this week. Maybe catch up on some sleep, eat a lot, and not go drinking. That way we can enjoy our trip to Maine this weekend,” he said with a big grin.

“Yeah. I guess that sounds like a good idea. I just don’t want to hold you back from having fun. This is your summer
abroad and me getting drunk yesterday shouldn’t affect you like this,” I said sympathetically.

He shook his head. “No, I need this, too. We
’ve done a lot over the past weeks, and a week without any drinking will be good. We can do things that regular couples do. I want to try out that Mexican restaurant you talked about and maybe go to the science museum. I’ll pamper you and make you feel like a queen. Then, when we go to Maine, we can relax and enjoy ourselves with no dark circles under those beautiful eyes.”

I smiled at him and took his hand into mine, intertwining our fingers.

“Now, finish your breakfast so I can climb back in bed with my American girl,” he said with a squeeze. I placed the tray down on the floor and held my arms out for him.

Sixteen

Maine

By the time we packed my car on Friday afternoon, we had a great sobering week. We went to museums, movies, new restaurants, and hikes around the city. We held hands and cuddled when we stopped by coffee shops. We always stayed within a foot
of each other when we were together. Teagan was doing well at work and I was able to catch up on my classes after only a few days and some long conversations with my professors.

Throughout the week, Teagan asked me questions about my friends who were getting married. I told him that
when I was growing up, I always had a large crowd of friends, but after high school, everyone went their separate ways. One night over ice cream, Teagan asked me about Chase. I had mentioned him every once in a while but never went into the details of our relationship.

“Well, it
’s kind of a long story,” I said. “Maybe I’ll tell you about it on the ride up to Maine.”

He smile
d and simply nodded. I could tell he was looking forward to the upcoming weekend. I gave him a knowing smile, letting him know that I was also looking forward to our trip alone. Not to mention that we’d have my family’s island cabin for two whole nights.

When we get outside to head out on the road, he start
ed tickling me at the bottom of his steps. I started laughing out of control and he pulled my car keys out of my hand.

“Hey! What are you doing?” I asked aghast.

“Driving.” he said with confidence.

“You don’t even have a driver’s license!” I squeal
ed.

“Yes, I do
.”

“
Humph.” I offered no more protests. I felt much better sitting wingman, since I’d be able to enjoy the view. The view of Teagan.

We
weren’t even on the exit to North 95 when he glanced at me and asked, “So… Chase?”

“You remembered?” I asked in surprise.

“Yes, I want to know about your previous boyfriends. He must have been important if you were with him for a few years and moved across the country for him.”

“Um. Ok
ay. Well, Chase and I have known each other since my freshman year in high school. He is two years older than me. I actually was dating his friend, EJ, but that didn’t last long, and Chase was kind of an asshole when EJ and I dated, like I wasn’t good enough for his friend. It was really weird. So, I was a sophomore when I first went to a party and he came up to me and acted like he never hated me. It was so confusing. One minute, he hated me and then the next, he liked me. One minute, he looked at me like I was disgusting and then the next minute his eyes were looking me up and down like he wanted to swallow me whole.”

“I can understand that need… to eat you up, I mean
.” He smiled at me.

“Nice
.” I laughed. “Well, anyway, that night, he made sure I got his pager number and told me to call him if I ever wanted a ride to school. I took the bus but my house was on his way to our high school. So, that Sunday, I paged him and he called me right away. He’s friends with my brother and Conner loves him. So, that week, he started picking me up every day. He always had hard rock blaring through the radio so I could hear his truck coming down the road before he honked his horn.”

“We remained friends and I started dating another guy
, and even though I could tell he wasn’t pleased, he still gave me a ride every day. After that, well, he graduated. He started going to a local college, and one night at a keg party, he and I sat in the back of his truck and reacquainted ourselves. He kissed me that night for the first time. It was nice,” I said with a soft smile.

“After that, it was
a full on relationship. We saw each other every day, and about a year later, he told me he accepted a job in Portland, Oregon. At first, I was a little panicked because I was going to lose him. I did want to travel. I had so many mixed thoughts about what I should do. I was scared to be alone and I loved him. I really did. After he watched me for a few minutes, he took my hands and said he wanted me to go with him.”

“I wanted to get away and he talked about his apartment and the different things I could see there
. He had me convinced that it wouldn’t just be a temporary move but a life move,” I said. “I didn’t get very good grades in school because we partied. A lot. My parents were concerned about me not going to college and I could see the disappointment in their eyes. I couldn’t bear it anymore, so when I told them I was moving to Oregon, they perked up like I was going to do something with my life,” I said, air quoting the word “do.” I laughed.

“We moved six weeks later and he was right. He was a whole different
person. We met a lot of people, and a few of our friends even picked up and moved out there to be with us. We partied more than I ever had in my life. We both celebrated our 21
st
birthdays there and we were out of sight from our families and our neighborhood. I got a good job and did really well. I was an administrative assistant for three years at a good company, and I think my parents were proud of me. They came out to visit and I took them to the local waterfalls and hot springs. They left me there, very satisfied that I was living a good life.”

“One night, after Chase graduated from college, we decided to stay. Neither one of us saw a reason to move home. I had a
decent job and he was able to get a really good job so we got a nicer apartment. It turns out that an apartment and a good job won’t make a relationship work. One night, I brought up marriage and he flipped out. I think I noticed we had grown apart. At parties, we hardly hung out with each other. At the beginning, we couldn’t keep our hands off each other, but it changed sometime. I don’t know,” I said as I looked out the window at the passing cars. I started to think about that fateful night when it all ended.

I would never
tell Teagan about it. I didn’t tell many people that didn’t already know. I will never forget the look that Chase gave me when he found me out back, making out with one of his co-workers. Chase started calling me every name in the book. I will never forget the hurt in his voice. I will never forget when he threw all my stuff out of our apartment and onto the front steps. I will never forget living in my car for two weeks while I found a place to live.

“He and I went our separate ways and I decided that Oregon was the place that he wanted to be
, not me. I didn’t feel like I belonged there anymore so one day, about five months after we broke up, I decided to start my life over again and move back to Boston. You met me weeks after I returned,” I said with finality.

He squeezed my hand over the clutch of the car and smiled. “He was a stupid guy to let you go
,” he said sweetly.

I pulled my hand away, feeling guilty
, and put David Gray in the CD player. I immediately switched it to “This Year’s Love” on purpose. His face went solemn and I quietly sang alone.

As we drove onto the ferry to the island, we locked up the car and went up to the passenger deck. It was a beautiful summer day.
I loved the glistening ocean and the songs of the birds, hunting for their prey, and the great salted breeze. I leaned back and my whole body relaxed. Teagan could see the change in me.

“This place suits you,” he said
, smiling over at me. He drew close and we kissed. It got deeper, and by the time it ended, we were nearly at the island. I drew back and watched as the boat started to turn around to unload. I stood up and grabbed his hand. Everyone around us started whistling and clapping at our obvious public display of affection. He kissed the back of my hand lightly and we headed down to the car. I took the keys and gave him a funny look then stuck my tongue out at him. He chuckled and we got into the car.

“So, Te
ag, who was your girlfriend in high school? There must be a good story there,” I said with a laugh.

“I dated someone for a while but things in Ireland are much different than in America. We went to the movies and occasionally kissed, but we never partied hard. I would walk her home from class and we held hands in school
,” he said with a smile.

“That sounds so tame. It doesn’t seem like the Teagan I know
.” I laughed.

“Yeah, it wasn’t cool to do what we just did on the deck at home. My mother and father would not be happy. And her parents?
God, I don’t even want to think about it,” he said.

“So what happened?” I asked.

“Umm…we’re still friends but we just grew apart, I guess. Kind of like you and Chase.” He looked over at me, gauging my reaction.

I pa
tted his knee, reassuring him that I understood.

“I
’m glad you’re here, Teag. You’re about to enter island partying. It can kind of become insane, so watch out.”

“I
’ll only be watching you.” He smiled at me.

I gave him a cheeky smile and started the car out onto the ramp. Teagan
was immediately rapt by the island and the people milling around, either getting off the ferry or people who were waiting for others. I drove up to the local store and turned off the car.

“Food. We need food. Then we
’ll head down to the docks to get some fresh lobsters,” I said.

We grab
bed burgers, hot dogs, chips, beer and water. Teagan threw down his credit card and I blushed.

“Why do you always pay for everything?” I asked
, perplexed.

“Because you’re my girl and no respectable guy lets his girl pay,” he stated.

“Okay, then.” The clerk smiled at Teagan and asked him where he was from. He smiled back to her and said he lives outside of Cork in Ireland. He grabbed the bags and my hand and we headed out the door. When I looked back at the young woman, she was entranced by watching Teagan. I couldn’t blame her.

After we pick
ed up the lobsters, we head towards the small cabin. It was painted blue and had a sun room set off to the right. Both the front door and the back door had beautiful window archways above them. Teagan looked at the cabin and then back to me.

“This is amazing,” he sa
id slowly under his breath.

I gave him a quick kiss on the cheek and leap
ed out of the car. I ran up to it and threw open the door to the familiar smell of summers lost to a younger version of me. Memories of the summers my family spent there came to life, and as I looked at the kitchen, I saw my dad in his jeans and t-shirt, reading a newspaper, while my mother hummed over breakfast. Teagan put his arms around my waist and he immediately started to kiss my neck.

“Let’s get the groceries out of the car then I
’ll give you the ten cent tour,” I said with a bounce in my step.

Teagan ignore
d me and started to look around the space while I brought in some bags. He turned to look at me and told me to stop. He flew out the door and grabbed the rest of our bags out of the trunk.

When he put down the bags and the food
was put away, I leaned into him and wrapped my arms around his neck. His eyes locked on mine and he dipped down to kiss me. I turned my face and let him kiss my neck.

“That drives me crazy,” I sa
id, amused.

He chuckle
d.

“What do we do now?” he ask
ed.

I pull
ed back and stared at him in earnest. “Well, we can rent bikes, go for a walk, or go down to the bar. We have kayaks and there’s a baseball diamond down through the woods. We can play one on one,” I said.

He cock
ed his eyebrow and I fake punched him in the stomach. One on one. God, his mind was always in the gutter. I started laughing and wiggled out of his arms and started out the back door. He chased after me and I headed for the forest behind the cabin. It took a quarter of a mile of dodging fallen trunks and the grassy dips through the forest until I came to the baseball diamond clearing. There were two small deer hiding out in the shadows. I stopped and gazed at them. Teagan laughed as he came up behind me.

I put my finger over my mouth to tell him to be silent. His eyes dart
ed around the clearing and I saw when he finally registered the deer. His whole face lit up and he took my hand. He led me to the pitcher’s mound and sat down with me in his lap. Flowers were blooming behind the diamond and I peered over Teagan’s shoulder to see some people horseback riding on the nearby trails.

“Lizzie, what are you thinking about?” Teagan ask
ed.

I put my head back to his shoulder and sigh
ed.

“This is my peaceful respite
,” I said. “I’m whole here, and with you with me, it just feels so good.”

“I know what you mean,” he sa
id as he placed a kiss on my temple.

I looked up at him with surprise. How could he possibly know what this place mean
t to me? He’d only been there for less than an hour and he loved this place as much as I did?

“No, it isn’t about the place, Lizzie. It’s you
,” he said. He ran his hand over his head then down his face, seeming to struggle with an internal battle.