Unsettled (Chosen #1) (5 page)

Seven

Walk

When I pulled up to Teagan’s place on Commonwealth
Avenue, it was clear that all the residents were still going about their lazy Sunday. There was absolutely no parking. With a dreadful sigh, I double parked outside his place and ran up the stairs only to find that I didn’t actually remember the apartment number. I hit all the first floor apartment buzzers.

I looked d
own to my dark Dickies jeans and Counting Crows tee and wondered how different I looked in my normal attire. Would Teagan notice I wasn’t wearing expensive clothes and jewelry? My hair was naturally pulled back in a wet, messy bun. Long hair was usually my preference but I always pulled it back to keep the front locks out of my eyes. I loathed my thick red hair when it got in my face. Cian answered the door and smiled brightly at me.

“Come on.
Nice to see you again, Lizzie,” he said.

I gave him a
n affectionate smile and started up the steps behind him. “You too.”

When
I entered the apartment, it was quiet. There was no TV, no noisy boys, no nothing. “So, is Teagan here?” I asked, feeling uncomfortable. I didn’t know if I wanted to see him now that I was actually there. The apartment felt familiar yet I was still a stranger. I couldn’t help wondering what I had signed up for when I agreed to this outing. Evidently, I did want to see him since I was in his apartment, ready to spend a few hours with him, sober nonetheless.

The memory of his touch and his smile cooled my nerves a little. Then, I thought of Freddie’s smile and that gave my stomach a jolt, too. Maybe, subconsciously, I wanted to see Freddie again, too. Fuck, my mind was playing games. You can’t want them both, Lizzie. Focus on Teagan. Freddie wasn’t the one who called.

“Yea
h, he’s getting dressed. He’ll be out in a minute,” he replied and nodded his head to the couch. It was the same couch Teagan and I spent hours talking, laughing, and kissing on and, God help me, I quickly scattered to sit on the opposite couch. Cian sat down next to me and pulled a sports magazine off the circular table. I sat perched on the edge then realized I was too nervous. Relax, Lizzie. Teagan is just a friend.

Teagan came out wearing a black shirt, black jeans and Adidas sneakers. He came right up to my knees and looked down at me
, smiling so bright, I was momentarily stunned. His look was so powerful and full of depth, there weren’t any words. He was such a bright light after the last two dismal days I had.

“Hey
,” I said, answering his smile.

“Hi
, Lizzie,” he said and sat down on the opposite couch. The couch.
Our couch.
I looked at it slowly from side to side and Teagan caught my look. He smirked, knowing that I was thinking of being in his arms.

I pretended to play with
the side loops on my Dickies as he put both arms up around the top of the couch and looked at me. Looking back at him with a half smile, I took in his looks. His piercing blue eyes, dark, full eyebrows, slim lips, long jaw and broad shoulders. Guys always looked better in your memories but oh, those blue eyes. I could swim and get lost in those eyes. I snapped myself out of my thoughts as I heard Teagan say something to Cian about a bar and a game. I couldn’t care less what he was saying as long as he kept talking because that sexy, fucking accent had me feeling a tightening in my panties. I needed to move. “So, you want to go? I’m double parked, and even though it’s Sunday, I shouldn’t risk getting a ticket.”

“Sure
,” he replied as he started off the couch. He grabbed his light coat and winked at me as he pulled it on. I smiled shyly and immediately felt ridiculous. I had this guy’s tongue in my mouth for hours. It was more than acceptable to wink at me.

We stood together and said our goodbyes to Cian
, who didn’t move his eyes from his magazine but offered up a goodbye as we headed out. Teagan opened both apartment doors for me and as we walked down the stairs to the car, he brushed his hand over the small of my back. I motioned to my car and we got inside. I turned to him.

“We can go to the Charles
River and walk the path or we can head a little further out of town to a nature trail I know about,” I said.

He shrugged and
put his seat belt on. “It’s up to you since you’re from here. However, take me someplace where we can be alone,” he replied. His accent was so thick it made me smile. I paused to stare at him, acting like I was trying to decide on our destination when in fact the butterflies came back in a rush. He was extremely fascinating and he was in my car. All mine and all alone. He smiled and motioned his hands to the road. “Get on. We don’t want a ticket.”

As Teagan looked through my CD
case, we talked about music. He slid David Gray’s CD in and turned the track to “This Year’s Love.” I glanced at him and told him it was one of my favorites. He gleamed back at me and said David Gray had played it the night before and mentioned how he swayed his head the whole time while he was singing. I laughed and as I went to put the gear into fifth. Teagan put his hand over mine and gently rubbed the top of my fingers with his. It sent shivers up my spine and I just couldn’t look at him. Not once. The whole ride, I left my hand there and my face remained focused on the road. I softly sang along to David’s deep voice, taking in the words and wondering if this was about Teagan and I.
“This year’s love had better last. Heaven knows it’s high time. I’ve been waiting on my own too long.”

Large oak trees lined the road and the leaves were in full bloom. It was so green and such a perfect day
. I felt like my soul was being lifted with every second. I parked in the small area to the left of the nature trail and stared out the windshield to see if there were other people walking. I turned off the car and looked over to Teagan.

“
I think we have the whole place to ourselves. Are you ready?” I asked with a big smile.

“
Let’s wait a few minutes in here. I want to talk to you,” Teagan replied. I turned myself in the seat and waited for his next words.

“Well
, I know you aren’t as happy as you were when we were talking on the couch on Friday night,” he said. “I want to know what happened to you since then.”

I sat there looking at him, trying to understand
how a complete stranger would notice a change in my demeanor. People in the past had told me I wear my emotions on my sleeve but those people were friends. I didn’t discuss problems with complete strangers. Hell, when I had issues, I holed up in my room and didn’t let anyone in. I always wanted people to see that nothing got to me. But for some reason, I was comfortable with Teagan. His piercing blue eyes made me relax and I felt the truth being pulled out of my mouth.

“
Darcy got into a car accident Friday night. She totaled her car, was arrested, and then taken to the hospital. I know that she isn’t hurt…badly, but that’s all I know because Conner, my brother, hates me right now. When I called to talk with her, her mother insinuated that I never call her house again. I’m a bad influence on everyone I come in contact with,” I said that last part softly. It was like I was finally admitting to someone, and probably myself, that trouble followed me everywhere I went instead of deluding myself into thinking I followed trouble.

“Jesus Christ
,” he muttered while lowering his shaking head. He looked up to me with a serious look on his face that I couldn’t decipher. Was he upset that I said I was a bad influence or just that Darcy was in deep shit?

“Listen,
” he said, “I don’t know what to say other than I know for a fact that you tried very hard to stop her from driving that night. I know you demanded you wait to take her home after we bought you those drinks. You’re blaming yourself and I can tell you’re upset about that.”

“Yes,
” I murmured, looking at the top hem of his black shirt and his straight chin.

He pulled his hand off the seat and tucked it under my chin to set his softened eyes on me. “You are not to blame. You are beautiful
, inside and out. I have never seen a girl so determined to help out a friend. You were fierce. You are a good friend, no matter what anyone else says.”

“Yeah, well, tell that to everyone
that claims they love me,” I said deferentially.

“I
’m only in America for the summer. On August 17
th
, I head back to Ireland to finish my senior year at university. But, Lizzie, I like you a lot. I’ve thought about nothing but you over the last day and I was upset when I thought I might never see you again after Friday night. I like the way I feel when I’m around you. We didn’t even talk on the ride here and it was more fun than I’ve had with a girl in a long time.” He laughed. “I want to spend as much time with you as I can during this summer. However, I am leaving and I don’t see myself coming back after I graduate. So, if you want, I would like us to be friends and get to know each other. Most girls want a relationship, and if I was an American, you would be my girlfriend. But, I’m not so that wouldn’t be fair to either of us. Am I scaring you away?”

I was stunned. Nobody had ever been this forthright about
a relationship, or in this case, lack thereof. What happened to one day at a time? I thought about the summer camps I used to go to and the boys I would kiss at the lake or in the dancehall. Shit, I never saw those guys again and they probably lived an hour away.

Teagan
brushed his thumb across my cheek as he continued. “I understand if that… is not what you want. But I would like to hold you and hold your hand. I just want us to get to know each other in the next few months.”

I thought about all the
promises to call from one night stands that never came. I thought about the guys that I royally fucked over that actually wanted to have relationships with me and I just couldn’t find a reason for a long term commitment. I thought about Chase telling me that he didn’t see us ever getting married. I thought about this beautiful man in front of me, telling me that I would be, only could be his summer fling. An American girl. His American girl for a short period of time. For some reason, that flattered me. I felt special and yes, it would be the fun summer I was looking for. A nice memory for him of his time in America. He wouldn’t or couldn’t ever forget me. I would show him my feisty self, and besides, I always made a point to leave the guy with some sort of memory.

“Okay
, just for fun,” I said as I looked up to the clouds in the blue sky. I tried to process what I had just agreed to but decided it didn’t matter. It was such a beautiful day and I wanted, no needed, to stay in the moment. I couldn’t live in my past regrets and I didn’t even want to think about the future. Teagan would be fun. 

He smiled the widest smile
I’d seen from him yet and opened his door to get out. When I met him at the back of the car, he took my hand with a firm grasp and we headed towards the trail.
So, the summer romance began.

Teagan and I walked up the path towards the lookout point
. The large green field stretched across to an amazing view of Massachusetts Bay Community College. We found a ledge of rocks to sit on and I motioned for him to join me as I plopped down. I pulled a Marlboro Red out of my pocket and lit it.

“Can I get one of th
ose?” he asked.

I nodded and handed him
a cigarette. After we stared at the green field in silence for a while, I pointed to the big brick building and said, “I’m starting school there in two weeks for summer courses. It’s just two classes but I should start on my degree while I’m still young, right?” I smiled.

“Do you work?” he asked.

“No, not yet. I just got back into town. I have a few interviews this week for administrative stuff. I did some of that when I lived in Portland, so I’m sure I’ll find something.” I nodded with certainty. I really only had one interview with a small financial firm close to my house that paid minimum wage and looked like a data entry position. Boring data entry. It was a bit embarrassing, but Teagan didn’t need to know that. I also didn’t want to tell him.

I was taking the pre
requisites for the actual accredited courses because I blew my SATs and all other gauging tests. Those important tests just weren’t my thing. They measured how smart people were, and as far as I was concerned, I was average. Street smart was a whole different story, or so I thought.

I sat straight up and flicked my cigarette to the ground, half finished
, and crossed my arms against my chest. I couldn’t help feeling inadequate in that moment. Teagan would see there was nothing special in me eventually.

“Are you cold?
” he asked in concern.

“Maybe a little. Oregon is
milder than here. Even when it rains, there isn’t a drop in the temperature. When it’s blazing hot, then it drops 5 degrees, people notice in Boston. Plus, we’re sitting in the shade,” I replied, nudging him.

“Come here
.” He pulled himself back from the ledge, opened his arms to me then put me in between his legs. We sat quietly for a moment and a jolt of electricity went through my body when he nuzzled my neck, giving little tickles and licks. When he licked the back of my ear, I started laughing.