We Are Not Good People (Ustari Cycle) (28 page)

I let go and felt drained, as if listening took physical energy. Instantly, I wanted to put my hand back on it, find out what else it was trying to tell me. “This way,” I croaked, turning left.

At the end of the alley was the back of Happy Garden, a Chinese joint I’d never eaten at. The back door was open, a greasy screen door the only barrier. The smell was simultaneously good and sickening. We stepped through a tiny tiled room with two mops and slop buckets sitting on the damp, muddy floor, and then we were in the kitchen. Three men in stained white smocks stared at us as we moved through the steam. I stared at the big bowl of fried rice as we passed it.

No one paid us any attention in the restaurant proper. We emerged from the kitchen, walked through the largely empty dining room, and were out on the street in seconds.

I started to clasp my hand around the
Udug
again and then snatched it back. Turned left on impulse and started walking, Mags panting beside me, tongue out, tail wagging.

“Where are we going?”

I didn’t know. I wanted the
Udug
to give me information, but I thought back on my experience reliving the Skinny Fuck’s life and realized the
Udug
was difficult to steer. To control. It told you things, addressing pressing needs first, but it gave you a lot of unrelated information along the way. Information that might be useful, but you
had to pick out the immediate stuff from the stream. I didn’t want to have the demon whispering in my ear all that time, giving me directions. The whispering was horrible, like having an ant in my brain, tunneling. But I wanted to listen. It was terrible, and I wanted it.

But I had no time.

I closed my fist around the
Udug
. It was slimy against my skin. It was warm and comforting. I almost imagined it moved.

they are waiting word is out Rue’s Morgue your name is on their lips they are waiting waiting the warehouse on the left left left second floor green bag forgotten fifteen thousand in diamonds Harry Miller will kill his daughter tonight many worlds many versions but she is unique now the last of them the last of them all a man in Topeka hates you goes to sleep thinking of you she is waiting she regrets letting the night go without touching you, your father is

I snapped my hand open.

“Jesus,” I croaked. My heart was pounding. I wanted to clutch the
Udug
against my chest, listen to everything it had to say. I wanted to throw it into the fucking river, watch it sink. Let it whisper its secrets to the fish.

“Lem?”

I looked at Mags. I hadn’t realized I’d stopped dead in the middle of the sidewalk. People stepped around us, staring. I put my hand out and found Mags’s shoulder.

“Rue’s,” I said. “Let’s get another goddamn drink.”

WE STEPPED INTO THE
familiar smoke-filled front room of Rue’s Morgue and there were people around us immediately. Hands on my shoulders. Gently pushing. I was guided to a table and lowered into one of their unstable old wooden chairs. A tumbler of whiskey was set in front of me. Old Neilsson sat down across from me as Mags was dropped into the chair next to me.

I blinked at the old bastard. Anxiety ate up my stomach and I looked around carefully. Thought about my blade, about Mags. Wondered
whether we’d be able to get some gas going if the old fuck wanted revenge.

I looked back at him and smiled. Spread my hands. “Neilsson!”

Letting my mouth shut with a click, I realized I had nothing else. No plan, no golden words.

Neilsson leaned forward. He was a thin, ancient fuck, with thick, bushy white hair turning yellow on the edges. Yellow fingers from years and years of cigarettes. Scars on his face, on his arms, hands—everywhere, I knew. When Neilsson finally kicked off, the coroner was going to have one for the books. A big nose that hooked down. A wide, wet mouth. Bright blue eyes that had lost nothing in clarity and power. When he was sober, Neilsson could cast a Glamour better than anyone. Could con the balls off a bull.

When he was sober. I looked him in the eye. He was sober now.

“Is it true?” he asked.

I blinked at him. “What?”

“Jesus! ‘What?’ he asks!” Neilsson said as someone placed another tumbler of whiskey in front of him. He ignored it. This told me that this was a serious meeting. This was important business, if Neilsson was going to let a drink sit in front of him. There was a rumble of noise through the crowd.

Neilsson reached up and produced a cigarette from his ear, where I would have sworn none had been. Held it between two gnarled, stained fingers. “Renar, kid. Mika Renar and her pet, fucking Cal Amir. The
Biludha-tah-namus
. Is it
true
? Jesus, we been
looking
for you two bastards.”

I blinked. “You heard about—”

He pounded one fist on the table. “It’s everywhere. There’s panic in the streets. Shit, boy, look around—every mage in the goddamn
city
is here. War council.”

I twisted around. He was right. I didn’t know all the names, but I knew most of the faces. Men and women, Tricksters, all of us on the hustle. Some had
gasams
, some were solo. Some bled others, some were like me—or like I had been—and only worked their own gas.

Turning back to Neilsson, I reached for the glass. No one of consequence. No
saganustari, no enustari
. Just Tricksters.

I drained the glass and placed it carefully back on the table. Without looking up, I nodded. “It’s true.”

The room exploded into noise. Everyone talking at once. They knew what it meant. The end of the world, the end of the
living
world, so that Renar would live forever. The end of
them,
which was the real point.

Neilsson shouted them down with an old drunk’s authority, waving his arms. When he had quiet, he looked back at me. “What’s being done, kid? Why aren’t the big shots on the march? Jesus, this crazy bitch is going to kill us all, and there ain’t a
saganustari
anywhere in the fucking city, far as I can tell. Where’s the fucking cavalry?”

I told them. I told them about Gottschalk. About the meeting in Texas while we were locked in the basement, a deal being made. The goddamn Illuminati dealt in, Renar cutting them in on the ritual so they could all live forever. I told them no one was coming.

Neilsson took it in. The room fell silent like it was all part of the old man’s brain, ruminating. Then he nodded once, decisively, and leaned forward.

“We’re in.”

I blinked. “In what?”

“You’re going up there, right? You’re going to throw a wrench into the business? We’re in. We’re
all
in. This is our fight as much as it’s yours. Fucking mages looking to put us all in the ground . . . We got to put them in the ground
first
.”

I stared. Looked around. Grim faces. Serious faces. Even Mags looked moved, wise, like a man who had seen death peeking around the corner but had opted to not alter course. I understood why they thought this mattered, why they thought a room full of fucking small-time grifters with a spark could go up against Mika Renar and Cal Amir and every other
ustari
of any caliber. Because I had the same feeling. We had nothing to fucking
lose
.

“Is this it?” I said by way of due diligence. By way of making them feel it, understand it. “Not a single
ustari,
huh? Anyone with a whiff of power, sitting at home tonight, blue balls waiting for immortality to light them up? Just us freaks, then.”

A soft ripple of laughter swept through the crowd. Then a tall old man shouldered his way from the rear. He looked like he’d been in a fight and lost. His lined face was purple and yellow. His hands, long fingers and big, gnarly knuckles, were scabbed all over. One front tooth was just a bloody shard.

“There’s me,” Ev Fallon said softly.

23.
WE WERE FORMING AN ARMY
of Assholes. The
Udug
reminded me of this every time I touched it.

In a fit of collective insanity, I was the general of the operation. By virtue of being the only one of us aside from Fallon to have any direct experience with Renar or her house. And because all of a sudden everyone thought I had ability. Everyone quoted Hiram. Hiram telling everyone, apparently, that I was a bitter disappointment to him because I had a gift. I had a way with the Words. I could whittle any spell down to a quickness. But I wouldn’t bleed people.

Only now I was bleeding people.

I sat in the back room of Rue’s. A bottle of single malt, a thick glass tumbler, and an ashtray on the table in front of me. Pitr Mags overflowed a chair, leaning against the wall behind me. Asleep, it seemed. Mags had a talent for looking asleep. It was part of the protective coloring that had kept him alive this long despite his congenital idiocy.

Ketterly had floated in with Daryl. All the grifters had taken pity on Daryl, who was still pining for Claire with the adolescent kind of stoicism that inspired soft looks and affectionate petting. Me, I was keeping my eye on the boy. The glyphs on Claire were one possible explanation
for his ongoing devotion, but I was beginning to wonder if Daryl was the sort who naturally fell in love with tall, leggy girls with short dark hair and a few homicides under their belt. Hell, I thought, that described me, and no one had Charmed me into anything. I didn’t know exactly why the thought bothered me—that if we took the Charm off, he’d still be mooning about with a bouquet of fucking flowers in one callused hand—but it did. I kept reminding myself that just because I could cast an anti-Charm on him without having to bleed for it didn’t mean I
should
.

It was getting harder and harder to remember that.

They came one after the other, offering up their services. I was dividing them into Bleeders and folks who had some skill, some tricks that would be useful. When I needed a little help, I pushed my hand into my pocket, where the
Udug
was strangely warm, and touched it for a second or two. It told me something about the person in front of me, then kept trying to say something about Mags.

she has forgotten a spell you will find useful yes you must push her hard to remember the horses remember the horses the penthouse in Shanghai the tiny boxes with people inside them Pitr Mags is

I removed my hand every time. I didn’t want to know. I didn’t care if the end of the sentence was
going to stab you in the face
—I didn’t want to know.

Every time I touched the
Udug,
my heart pounded in my chest, my hands shook. I hated it. But it was getting easier to tolerate and easier to guide. It was all about willpower. You had to concentrate. You could force it to stay on subject. But the second you slipped, the second you lost focus, it veered off and started whispering about something else. It told me where fifty thousand dollars was buried out in Queens. It told me which women I knew would sleep with me if I asked. It told me about women I
didn’t
know who would sleep with me. It told me Neilsson was already halfway to drunk and would be passed out within two hours, and that I could not trust him. It told me that the winning lottery numbers tomorrow would be 34-5-7-19-23-1 in the state of Rhode
Island. It told me the winnings would be six and a half million dollars. It circled back around and told me where my father was. It told me he hadn’t thought of me in six years. Not even a thought.

I nodded at the woman sitting across from me. The
Udug
hadn’t told me what, exactly, her spell was. “You’re in,” I said, reaching for the bottle. “Remember the horses.”

She froze, halfway out of the wooden chair. She was a beat-up old battle-ax. Bleached, wiry hair. A layer of makeup that would defy most modern tools. She was wearing too many coats, though the precise number was mysterious. Her mouth had the perpetually wet look of badly fitted dentures. But the
Udug
had told me she had at least one useful spell, so she could keep her sleeves rolled down.

She stared at me for a moment, startled, then turned and shuffled back to the main part of the bar.

As she left the room, a kid was sauntering in. I hated him on sight. Sixteen, seventeen, all pimples and swagger. He smirked at me as he dropped into the chair across from me, and it made me feel mean.

I put my hand on the
Udug
.

jimmy marbles they called him jimmy marbles he masturbates three times a day thinks no one knows everyone knows all the people in his building he forgets to close the shades ask him about the dog ask him about Boogie where’s Boogie where’s Boogie

I lifted my hand. I didn’t want it to tell me he knew some amazing old spell, time travel or nuclear holocaust or something. I smirked back at him, feeling mean.

“Tell me about Boogie,” I said. “The dog.”

The transformation was instant. His smirk dripped away, leaving a hollowed-out stare. He sat there, visibly shaking, then stood up and, without a word, turned and left the room. I watched him go, triumph souring into anger and regret. What the fuck had that accomplished?

But it had felt good.

This was becoming a mythmaking session. No one but Mags knew about the
Udug
. To everyone else, I was becoming more messiah-like
with each passing moment. I could see the long con: Using the
Udug
, I would know things. Just
know
things. Combine that with a few easy tricks, a couple of
mu
that were more flash than substance, and I could build up a following. A cult. Throw in a few dedicated Bleeders, I’d be rich. An
ustari
—maybe even
saganustari
if I learned a few big spells. And I could learn big spells. Hell, I could
write
big spells.

I wouldn’t be some fat asshole like Gottschalk or a fancy dandy like Amir. I’d bring everyone with me. A rising ship and all that. All these Tricksters, I’d bring the circus along for the ride. My court. I saw myself, hotel to hotel, first-class everything. Me and Mags and Claire and room service and limousines and one day Renar sends a note, asks for an audience. Invites me to a meeting of the Illuminati, wants my input on how