When Parents Worry
Read When Parents Worry Online
Authors: Henry Anderson
WHEN
PARENTS
WORRY
The Real Calls Doctors Receive … from Moles
That Seem to Move to Funny‑Smelling Poo
HENRY ANDERSON, MD
My one-year-old can’t say, “Mama.” Instead, she calls me “Dada.” Is that a problem?
My mother said my son has a skinny penis. Please call ASAP.
A bird pooped in my daughter’s mouth yesterday. Do we need to worry about anything?
My daughter bobs her head in her high chair while she’s listening to rap music. Please call.
Betty ate cheese from a mousetrap from which the mouse also ate. Is that anything to worry about?
My child is on amoxicillin, and since he began the medication his poop doesn’t smell.
My two-and-a-half-year-old son keeps saying he’s a girl. Should he know that he’s a boy?
Our Gymboree teacher feels Ray has poor upper arm strength.
Can you please check Jimmy’s ears? Because he’s afraid of the wind.
Can I take my child to the zoo?
Diaper is dry. Blanket is soaked. Please advise.
My son is humping everything and he will not stop. Please call to advise.
We want to introduce new foods to our baby. When can we start with caviar?
I think my daughter’s having night terrors. She’s kind of flying out of her crib.
Introduction
If there’s one thing I know for certain, it’s that children do not come with instruction manuals. As a pediatrician, I’ve seen it all—kids stuffing M&M’s up their noses, kissing live frogs, and even drinking toilet water. Nothing can compare to some of the things I’ve heard from sleep-deprived parents with the best intentions.
Over the years, I’ve received hundreds of distressed phone calls from well-meaning moms and dads concerned about everything from their child’s eating habits to the risks of sitting on Santa’s lap. Sure, sometimes their concerns and requests are a little bizarre, baffling even, but then again, so is the wild adventure we call parenthood. This book celebrates that chaotic world of stomachaches, bumps and bruises, and unnecessary pangs of worry with real phone messages from concerned parents whose kid just …
Gilligan’s Island
reruns during her 4:30
A.M.
feeding. Is that okay?
I was changing my child’s diaper, and he peed in his own eye. I’m panicking. Is he going to go blind?
 | A toilet bowl lid fell on our son’s penis. Please call when you get a chance. |
I have a question regarding which mattress to buy for Harry. Please call because the sale is ending today.
 | We’re concerned because our three-year-old son Mikey is getting excited about girls. |
I left my grocery list in your office at my visit an hour ago, and now I don’t know what to buy at the store.
| My daughter has become a real monster. Do you think that the “threes” have become the new “twos”? |
My cat has cancer and I’m worried it’s contagious, especially if Jane swallows some of the cat’s hair.
The school nurse keeps sending our son home and saying he’s sick. We told her that he saw the doctor and everything’s fine, but we didn’t really come in to the office. Now she wants a note from you. What should we do?
 | My son has a cough. Can I put Vicks VapoRub on his feet and cover them with socks? |
| My son sucks his thumb so much, I think it’s falling off. |
My son was seen in your office for a cold. I need a note stating that he can return to swim class.
(This call was received on December 22nd … I saw him on November 28th.)
| My son has been biting some kids in preschool. Do you think he’ll be violent later in life? |
Vicky’s shoulder has been hurting after she plays Wii.
My husband wants to take our three-year-old daughter skiing. I don’t think it’s safe. Who’s right?
| I’m concerned because Jane’s foot hasn’t grown in a year. |
| I would like to see a chiropractor because our three-month-old is colicky. Do you have any recommendations? |
Bobby’s vitamins are making him hyper. Is there anything we can do?
| My child was running around a lot, and now her heart is beating really fast. |