Whisper Through The Pain (A Novella) (9 page)

Chapter Thirteen

Melissa slid into the back seat of the chauffeured SUV and rested her eyes. She was exhausted. For the past two months, she’d zigzagged across the United States, not staying long in one spot.

Jake betrayed her. The memory of what transpired that night in his hotel room was still fresh. She inhaled deeply, waiting for the ache to subside. It didn’t. The hollowness still held her in its grip. Thinking about Jake caused such ravaging pain in her chest she couldn’t breathe.

Was fool stamped on her forehead? Why was she drawn to men who couldn’t or wouldn’t commit?

After checking into a modest hotel in New York, she’d stayed in the city for two days, hiding from Jake. She knew he would immediately think she’d returned to L.A. 

When she left New York, she went to Vermont, stayed in a cozy cabin sat in the window seat and watched the snow fall. Then she flew into Los Angeles long enough to file the divorce papers and leave. A few weeks ago, she landed in Miami and rented a small beach house. She found she liked the city with its hustle and bright nightlife, beaches and sunshine

Being in Miami gave her time to reflect, especially about her parents. She hadn’t spoken to them in five years. Whenever she did think about them, she pushed the thoughts away. Examining the pros and cons, she decided it was time she confronted the demons of her past.

An hour ago, she’d landed in Dallas, where it all began. 

The car slowed when the driver turned onto a long road leading to her parent’s palatial estate. Melissa looked out the window at the passing scenery and felt an array of emotions—sadness—fear, joy and rejection.

This was the place where she grew up and loved—and hated. When she left Dallas, she’d left everything behind—memories, good and bad—and her parents.

For a moment, the thought of leaving consumed her. Finally she took a deep breath, her l heart still racing, she squared her shoulders and stepped out. She stood beside the car and observed the familiar grounds; four hundred acres of prime Texas real estate. There were over two thousand trees on the property.

She remembered her mother stating if Oprah Winfrey could have that many trees on her property, so could she.

Many rose bushes, several displaying different colored buds, flanked the front of the house, giving it a very rich and whimsical atmosphere.

The house itself was a statement.  It was an impressive 10,000 square-foot mansion. With seven bedrooms and six and a half baths, it was featured in
Architectural Digest
two years straight. No one would ever say her mother wasn’t pretentious. She wore it like a crown of glory.

She turned and spoke to the driver. “I don’t know how long I’ll be. I’ll call when I’m ready to leave this place.”

He nodded. “Yes, ma’am.”

He got into the SUV and left. Melissa watched the vehicle until it was out of sight.

She rang the doorbell. The door was immediately opened as if she had been expected.

“Oh, my Lord,” the tall gray-haired woman said, a hand flying to her chest. Her dark brown face was weathered but still strong. She hadn’t changed much since Melissa last saw her. Only her hair showed whiter than she remembered. The woman’s eyes filled with tears. “Missy? I can’t believe it’s you. You’ve come home to me.”

“Hello, Miss Sarah.”  Melissa offered a genuine smile at the nickname only Sarah called her. Her mother hated the name, which only caused her to love it more. She stepped through the doorway into the huge foyer.

It never sat well with her mother that she called a member of the staff “miss.” She’d told her many times it wasn’t proper etiquette and not done in their social circle. But Melissa had stuck to her guns, giving the old woman the respect due to an elder well advanced in age.

She grabbed Melissa in a big hug, squeezing so hard she struggled for air. Melissa eased away so she could breathe, but Sarah held her hands. This lady had been with the family since well before she was born.

She’d treated her like a cherished granddaughter. Sarah had been there during her childhood, teenage years, giving her an abundance of love and support, something she never received from her own parents. More importantly, she’d been a rock to lean on when her marriage to Brent was ending. She felt remorse she hadn’t kept in touch with the older woman but, at the time, it’d been too hard.

Melissa continued to smile. “It’s good to see you.”

“You don’t know how much you’ve made this old woman happy today.” She took a clean white handkerchief from the pocket of her apron and wiped her eyes.

“I’m glad.”

“Come on in, child.” She pulled Melissa through the door. “You must be weary.”

“I’m fine. Are my parents at home?”

“They’re havin’ afternoon tea in the drawing room.”

Melissa glanced at her watch. “It’s a little late for that, isn’t it?”

Sarah laughed heartily. “Indeed it is. But Mr. Delaney was late comin’ in from his golf game. You know your mama, she likes tradition.”

Melissa frowned. “How well I know.”

An uncomfortable silence followed.

The housekeeper cleared her throat. “Come on, let me walk you back.”

“No need. I remember where it is.”

“Of course you do, honey.” She patted Melissa’s hand. “I’m just so glad to see ya. I’m beside myself. I’ll just go and finish fixin’ the supper.”

Melissa patted her hand. “I’ll see you before I leave.”

Sarah’s eyes widened. “Leave? You ain’t staying?”

“No, I’m not.”

“Well, at least stay for a bite to eat. We’re having rosemary-roasted chicken and a big old T-bone steak for your daddy.”

Melissa smiled. “I’m surprised Mother hasn’t made Daddy give up red meat.”

Sarah chuckled. “She tried, honey. But, Mr. Delaney, being a true Texan, put his foot down on that one.”

“And mother caved in?”

“Not without a fight. But your daddy held his ground.”

“Things have changed.”

“In some ways,” she said softly. “Missy, I promise I’ll prepare one of your favorites to go along with supper. Glazed carrots with sweet cream butter, cinnamon sticks, vanilla bean and fresh basil,” she said, eagerly. “How’s that sound?”

“Oh, Miss Sarah. It sounds wonderful. I haven’t had that since I left Dallas. But, I can’t promise I’ll stay.

Sadness showed on the old lady’s face.

Contrite, Melissa said, “Why don’t you fix me a small container to go?”

A bright smile broke out on Sarah, creating creases around her mouth. “Okay. Now go on, so I can get done.”

Melissa laughed, kissed her on the check and walked the rest of the way through the foyer. When she reached the double doors, the voices of her parents were low, but she heard clearly her mother chastising her father for delaying their afternoon tea. As usual he said nothing. He hated tea but did anything to appease her mother.

She entered through the opened door unnoticed. The elegant décor, although different from the last time she was in the room, still conveyed the flavor of an English countryside mansion.  No one could say her mother didn’t have style or class.

“Hello,” she said, softly.

Both parents looked toward the door, shock riveted on their faces. No one moved as they looked at each other in silence. She walked toward them. Her father was the first to come out of his stupor and rose to his feet. He met her halfway and engulfed her into his arms.

“Oh my God, Melissa!” He murmured her name over and over again. She squeezed her eyes, holding back the tears, savoring the peace and warmth of being in her father’s arms. No matter what had happened in the past, she loved him unconditionally. She realized at that moment how much she’d missed him.

She tried to pull back but he held her closer and she let him. Finally, he loosened his grip and created a small space between them. Tears in his eyes escaped down his cheeks. 

She swallowed hard. “Hi Daddy,” she said, breathlessly. “It’s good to see you.”

“You too, honey.”

Jasper John Delaney was a handsome man. Golfing, horseback riding and those ski trips to Aspen every winter kept his tall frame lean through the years. At fifty-eight, his blond-hair showed speckles of gray throughout but it didn’t take anything away from him. He was the same man she had idolized from afar all of her life.    

He pulled back. “Let me take a good look at you.”

She tried not to squirm as he examined her.

“You’re still my beautiful baby girl.”

She smiled. “I’m no longer a baby or a girl, Daddy.”

“You’ll always be my baby.”  He put his arm around her and walked with her toward her mother. “Elizabeth, our girl has come home.”

Her mother remained seated. “I see.” Her tone held no welcome. She looked her up and down without expression. “It’s good you kept your weight off. You have a tendency to fluctuate between five to ten pounds.”

“Elizabeth!” Her father’s voice ricocheted throughout the room. “You haven’t seen our daughter in five years. Is that all you can do is to make a disparaging remark about her weight?”

Melissa flinched when her mother’s features tightened into a hard mask. She backed up a step. But her father held her steady and rubbed her arm with a reassuring gesture. After all of these years, Elizabeth Delaney still had the ability to wound her. She took a deep breath, determined not to let her mother see how much her words hurt her.

She’d built up confidence through the years and she would be damned if she’d let her mother destroy it.

“What the hell has gotten into you woman?” Her father continued his tone, now cold and forbidding. “I know you can be snobbish, abrupt and a borderline bitch, but I’ve never known you to be cruel, especially to your own child.”

“Daddy!”

Melissa was shocked. She’d never heard her father talk like that to her mother.

Her mother’s very light skin paled at her father’s reprimand. Her lips pursed tightly together, creating wrinkles around her mouth. She glared at her husband and then at her, rose slowly from her chair, and smoothed down her silk Carolina Herrera dress.

She folded her hands together and remained erect. She stood poised as if she was getting ready to deliver an important speech to a large stadium of people.

“What’s
gotten
into you, Jasper to make you think you can speak to me like that? I won’t tolerate it.”

Her father released Melissa and now stood facing her mother. “You won’t tolerate?” He laughed humorlessly. “I have tolerated more than any man when it comes to you. I stood on the sidelines and watched you isolate our daughter from this family. When she married Brent you were finally a mother, not great, but d
ecent
, which isn’t saying a lot. But that didn’t last long.”

“Daddy! Don’t.”

“No, baby, this needs to be said.”

“If you stood back and watched, what does that say about you?” Elizabeth said sarcastically.

“I admit I was a shitty father. When it came to you, I had no backbone—”

“And you have some now?” she sneered. “Do you want me to offer congratulations?”

“Stop it! Both of you. I didn’t come back to tear you apart—”

“Then why did you come!” Her mother’s frigid tone caused her to catch her breath.

A chill ran the length of her spine. Melissa wouldn’t back down now. She couldn’t. This was too important. “Why do you hate me so much?”

Elizabeth gasped. Her eyes quickly widened with hurt but it disappeared as quickly as it came. She was now the mistress of her emotions. Melissa felt her eyes were playing tricks on her. Pain was what her mother gave other people, not something she felt.

“What are you talking about?” Elizabeth asked.

She heard surprise in those curt words. This proud woman, whom she’d always tried to please and couldn’t, looked confused at her words.

“You heard me, Mother. All my life I’ve tried to be exactly what you wanted—studious—accommodating—and appreciative to be the daughter of Elizabeth and Jasper Delaney. But it was never enough for you.”

Elizabeth blinked as if she was in a fog. She shook her head in bewilderment. “I’ve always wanted what was best for you.”

“No,
you wanted
what was best for you—your image—your house, and your friends. Those were the important things in your life.”

Helplessly she looked at her husband. “Jasper… Are you going to let your daughter talk to me like that?”

Her father didn’t say a word. Elizabeth Delaney took a long and deep breath, her hand going to the genuine fresh-water pearls at her neck. In a quick movement she twisted them through her manicured fingers. 

“I don’t need Daddy to fight my battles, Mother. I stopped scratching and digging for the crumbs you carelessly drop along the way a
long
time ago.”

Her mother flinched but ironically it didn’t faze Melissa. She was tired of being the one who begged for acceptance. If her own mother never loved her. She now accepted it. She’d lost too much in her life, Brent, their friendship, and Jake. Distress gripped her as her mind skimmed on the last encounter with her husband. She shook her head. No more dwelling on what could’ve been. It was over.