Wish I May (26 page)

“Goddammit, Cally.” My eyes close, and I have to grit my teeth. “You’re so wet I can feel it, and I haven’t even taken off my shorts yet.”

“What are you waiting for?” She slides her fingers into my hair and tugs my mouth down to hers.

I growl against her and curl my fingers into her hips. “Do you have any idea how much I’ve thought about this sweet body of yours? Do you have any idea how crazy it made me to have you sleeping upstairs, so fucking close but off limits?”

I peel the robe from her shoulders and let it drop to the floor. “You are so insanely beautiful.” I drop my head to open my mouth against her breasts. One at a time, I draw the taut peaks into my mouth, between my teeth, until she cries out and arches closer.

“William,” she whimpers. “Please.”

I lift my head, my fingers picking up where my mouth left off and rolling a perfect pink nipple between my fingers. “What, baby? Please what?”

She shudders and presses her breast further into my hand. “Please, can you?”

I need to hear her say it, to hear the words from her lips, but I can’t resist another taste and have to lower my head to her breasts again and roll a nipple against my tongue.

“God, you taste good.”

Her hands thread through my hair and tug, and when I close my mouth over her and suck, the cry that rips through her is almost enough to make me go off in my shorts.

“William,” she whimpers, and I love the way she says my full name. “Inside me. Please.”

My breath leaves me in a rush. There they are. The words I’ve been waiting for. But I’m not ready.

Sliding my hands under her ass to support her, I swing around and take four long strides to the bed. I slowly slide her down my body until she’s sitting on the bed. Grabbing her hips, I tug her forward until she’s leaning back on her elbows and her hips are at the edge of the bed. Then I kiss my way down her body—across her collarbone, between her breasts, down her belly.

I scrape my teeth over one hip then trail my mouth across her stomach. Stopping at her navel, I circle the little jeweled piercing with my tongue before opening my mouth against the soft flesh and sucking.

She bucks her hips, and I cup her, hot and wet, between her legs.

“God, you’re amazing,” I murmur. She gasps at the touch of my hand.

I position her feet back on the bed so her knees are bent and she’s open to me. Then I sink to my haunches and look at her.

She reaches for me. “What are you doing?”

A smile curls my lips, and I press lightly against her inner thighs until her legs fall open and she’s completely exposed to my gaze.

“William,” she whimpers as I trace my finger down her swollen, sensitive sex.

Her legs come together, and I press them open again and lower my head and taste her. She arches against me, crying out again until the sound of her moans, the feel of her fingers tangling in my hair, and the taste of her against my tongue has my cock aching impatiently in my shorts.

But I won’t be rushed. I circle her clit with my tongue, and she trembles under me.

Lifting my head, I lock my eyes with hers. “Don’t hold back, Cally. Let me make you come.”

I sink two fingers inside her. She pulses around me. So damn close. Taking her clit between my lips, I suck the same moment I cover her mouth with my free hand. She trembles under my mouth, until she’s pulsing around my fingers and her cry is muffled against my hand.

“
G
OD, YOU’RE
beautiful when you come.” His eyes are hot on mine as he works his way back up my body, one hand still cupping me between my legs. My limbs are limp, my body relaxed, but just the heat in his eyes reignites something in me.

Just like that, I need more.

William climbs on top of me, and I wrap my legs around his hips. I’m greeted with the long, thick shaft of his cock pressing against my clit through his cotton shorts. Just that contact and I’m whimpering—with that dangerous cocktail of pleasure, need, and nostalgia.

“I made so many damn mistakes when you were out of my life. When I you left, I lost more than my girlfriend. I lost myself.” He traces my lips with his thumb, and the tenderness in his eyes nearly undoes me. “Be with me, Cally. You’re my compass. My north star.”

My throat is thick, and his words have tears pushing at the back of my eyes.

“I love you,” he murmurs. He kisses the corner of my mouth, my ear, then my cheeks, where his lips press the wet heat of my tears into my skin. “I’ve always loved you.”

I shake my head, needing him to understand. “You don’t love me. You love the girl I used to be.”

“Do you have any idea how amazing you are
now
?” His eyes lock with mine as he whispers the words. “Everything you’ve done for the girls and your father…the way you just picked up and left your old life? Not many people your age would do that. You work nonstop, and you’re always doing for them. I don’t need my memories to be head over heels in love with you, Cally. All I have to do is know you.”

My heart is full and broken all at once, and I can’t allow myself to return his words. I’ve said
I love you
so many times since leaving William, and every time it was a lie. I won’t let the words be tainted by my lips. “Make love to me, William.”

Something flashes over his face. My choice of words doesn’t escape his notice. But that’s what this is. That’s what it will be between Will and me. Some people have sex or intercourse. Some people fuck
.
But with Will, no matter how fast or slow, tender or rough, after all these years of waiting, I know it will be making love. And that’s what I need now. More than anything.

In seconds, he’s off me, standing beside the bed and shucking his shorts. He slides on a condom from his end table, and I swallow hard at the sight of him—long and thick, and a little intimidating.

He lies back on the bed, his head propped against a pillow, and crooks his finger at me.

Placing a knee on either side of his hips, I straddle him. He guides me until he’s pressing against my entrance.

My eyes close in anticipation of the pain-laced pleasure I know his size will bring.

“Look at me,” he commands, fingers digging into my hips.

I open my eyes and lock them on his as he slowly slides inside me. My body has to stretch to accommodate his size, but he’s patient and lets me adjust to him. Just having him inside me brings me close again. He stretches me and presses deep, and his eyes don’t leave my face until I start moving over him, creating a rhythm for our bodies as he slides deep again and again. Pressure building, my body tightening.

He pulls me forward and cradles my ass in his hands. When his mouth latches onto one of my nipples and draws it tight, I come apart again, and he tightens his hold on my hips and rocks into me with three hard strokes before coming with me.

“Why did you keep resisting this?” We’re lying in bed nude, our sweaty skin drying under the soft breeze of the ceiling fan. He took care of the condom in the bathroom and then came back to bed and drew my body against his.

“Maybe I wanted you to beg,” I tease.

He grunts. “If I thought that would do it, I would have.”

The humor leaves me suddenly. He deserves a real answer. “Because I’m not staying. Leaving you once almost killed me. I don’t know if I can survive leaving you a second time.”

He hooks his foot behind my knee and rolls us over so he’s above me, his hands framing my face. “So don’t leave. You have a job here. A place to live. What are you so anxious to get back to?”

My heart squeezes in my chest. Because I want what he’s offering. I want to be the girl who believes in happily-ever-after again. I want to trust that everything happens for a reason.

But I’m not that girl I used to be, and Will deserves more than for me to pretend I am.

“It’s not that simple.”

“It can be.” He presses a kiss to my collarbone. “Are you really so desperate to get back to something there, or are you running away from something here?”

My throat grows thick. I can hardly speak because I can’t swallow my own lies when he’s looking at me with so much love.

“Stay.” He presses a kiss to the corner of my mouth. “There’s nothing you need to run from. I’ve got you. No matter what.” He kisses me again, this time right between my breasts. Right over my heart.

He settles next to me and pulls my body against his to sleep. “Hello, Cally,” he whispers, and seconds later, I feel his breathing change against my neck as he relaxes in his sleep.

I lie there, wide awake, wishing it were all as simple as he believes it to be.