With Every Breath (4 page)

There was an old brick library she had spent a lot of time reading, doing homework—anything to stay away from home as long as possible. The librarian hadn’t minded Jaden loitering until it closed if she had no place to go or nothing else to do. She’d spent hours poring over travel magazines, imagining a life far, far away from River Bend and Ellie.

“A festival, huh? Do they have rides too?” Jaden dug inside her purse for her cell phone. It was dead, and there was no reason to reach for it, but feeling it with her fingertips was a comfort. There would be a million missed messages when she finally got the phone charged.

“Yup, the works. And the Fourth of July parade, of course.” His smile went sideways again, and she fought to ignore the internal sigh. “I just go for the car show.”

Jaden’s lips teased into a smile. “So much like your dad.”

They both went silent, thinking of Jeremiah. He’d been a good man. Jaden hadn’t known her own father, not his name nor where he was from—nothing. She looked nothing like Ellie, which made it an easy assumption she’d gotten her looks from a man she never met. When all the other kids in her first grade class brought their dads to school for donuts, she’d wondered, though. Ellie never spoke of him, and Jaden had sensed it was best not to ask. As she got older, Jaden stopped wondering.

Jeremiah had become the father figure in her life. He was the one to teach her to bait a hook, how to drive on the gravel roads around town, how to check the oil and change a tire on Ellie’s beater car. Not all of her memories of River Bend were bad; there just hadn’t been enough good ones to make her stick around.

Cole drove the car around a hill and from here she could see the river wending through the valley below—it was breathtaking. How odd—she didn’t have any photographs of this view. Not one. Photographs became a big part of her life only after she left River Bend. There hadn’t been much she wanted to capture of her life before leaving.

“So, how have you been?” Jaden asked in the silence. She only now realized the radio wasn’t on.

“I’m good.” He shifted the car into second and it rumbled beneath them. “You?”

“I’m good.” Then she laughed, and smoothed an errant lock of hair out of her eyes. “Well, except for recent events, anyway. I’ll be better after a cool shower.”

“A cool shower; that sounds nice.” His gaze drifted down to the clinging romper she wore, then back to the road ahead.

Jaden’s mouth dropped open. She wasn’t okay with him undressing her with his eyes. What the hell was wrong with him? Him doing so shouldn’t make her pulse race, either. And what the hell is wrong with me?

Because she didn’t trust herself not to bask in the glow of his distasteful behavior, she chose to ignore him. Plus, she was conscious of smelling like a three-hour car ride, and a sweatbox from her stint on the side of the road. She didn’t want to think about Cole—a married Cole—and her body odor at the same time.

“Now Mia will have an excuse to go shopping until your luggage arrives.”

Despite her resolve to not encourage conversation, she laughed. “Does she need an excuse?”

“No.” He laughed and switched on the radio. The car filled with metal, and he turned the volume on low.

“I’m sure she’s too busy to drive me to Sterling for a shopping trip.”

“There are a few women’s stores in town.”

“Really? Like a boutique?” She kept her gaze averted. Wasn’t it almost like ignoring him if she didn’t make eye contact when they spoke?

“If that’s what you call it.” He sounded amused, and she struggled not to glance his way.

“We even have a lingerie store.”

She whipped her head toward him. “Huh?”

“Lingerie.” His smile was devilish, and it hit her deep in the gut.

She sucked in a breath. This guy was out of control!

She swallowed. Hard. “Mia said your business is doing well.” She looked straight ahead. They’d just passed the Welcome to River Bend sign.

“It is.”

“That’s great.” She could feel his gaze on her like a hot iron. Shouldn’t he keep his eyes on the road?

“So how often do you ask Mia about me?”

She jerked again to shower him with an incredulous stare. “What? I don’t ask about you.”

“Mm?” He was back to safe driving, his eyes on the road, but she felt as if his full attention was zeroed in on her like a bullseye.

She straightened in her seat. “Honestly, I haven’t thought of you in years.”

Liar, the pesky voice in her head whispered on echo-mode.

“Not even once?” He didn’t sound as if he believed her, and he shouldn’t.

But still. A married man shouldn’t care if an old fling thought about him, ever. What they had together had never been fully realized. It had been a small moment in time, their chance, and over in a blink of an eye. Kensie appeared with a belly full of baby—a shock she hadn’t been prepared for. Without a backward glance, Jaden stepped on a plane and hadn’t been back since. Later, she found out Cole hadn’t known about Kensie’s pregnancy; it hadn’t changed anything. Whatever they had was over.

She tried her best to sound indifferent. “Nope, not once.”

They were now driving through town on a side street, passing a subdivision of new homes.

“Guess I was worried for nothing then,” he said, a resigned note to his voice.

“You were worried?” She swung her gaze back. Before this ride was over, she’d have whiplash. “I mean, it wasn’t necessary. Water under the bridge.”

“I’m relieved.” He pulled into the driveway of a gray two-story house with a large wood swing hanging from the porch.

“Me too,” she said, and she was. Six years was a long time. Long enough for this all to be behind them.

Cole shifted the car into park then placed his arm over the back of the seat. “So you’ll go to dinner with me?”

Jaden’s eyes bulged. “Are you serious?”

His brows quirked with confusion. “Yes. Is that not okay?”

Holy-what-the-hell was in this town’s water?

“No, it’s not okay. And definitely not a good idea. In fact, it’s the worst idea I’ve ever heard.” She opened the car door and set one foot onto the driveway. “Ever.”

He cocked his head like a bird inspecting a worm with two heads. “Okay?”

Why did she need to explain to him all the reasons dinner was a bad idea, immoral even? What is wrong with this guy? She jumped from the car, and tugged her bag and purse out after her. She shut the door and winced; she hadn’t meant to slam it.

“Not on your life, Cole Brooks. I don’t mess around with married men.” She snapped the case’s handle into place then stomped away, rolling her bag behind her.

She made it to the porch steps before he said, “Jaden.”

She spun around to glare at him. “Cole?”

He stood between the car and the open door, an arm on the roof. An amused smile turned his lips into a work of art. “She keeps a key under the creepy little statue.” He lifted a finger in gesture.

The garden gnome in the flower bed wasn’t Mia’s style, and not something she imagined Mia would purchase to display.

“What is that?” She bent for a closer look. It was hideous. Scary. Like it might come to life and assault someone with the miniature shovel in its gloved hands.

Cole laughed as he climbed back into his car. “Gift from her mother-in-law.”

“Oh, wow,” was all she could think to say. She tilted the gnome and retrieved the key underneath. By the time she stood, Cole was backed out of the driveway and on the street.

He lifted his fingers from the steering wheel in a wave. “See you around, Jelly Bean.”

He took off down the street before she could throw something at him, like the garden gnome. She’d been twelve and an idiot, and had gotten it in her head to prove she could hang with the boys. No dare was too big for her, so she’d eaten half a jar of jelly beans—then proceeded to throw them all up. Apparently, she’d never live it down.

When his car disappeared around the block, she turned to climb the porch steps. A cold shower and Jesus, that’s what she needed.

She unlocked the front door with a huff. There was nothing special about Cole.

True, over the years, curiosity had gotten the best of her. She’d scrolled through Mia’s pictures on social media, knowing she’d see Cole’s face there. She had no clue what possessed her to linger on his image, a man who was better left in her past. Every time she clicked off his image there was a small ache in her chest. He had a little boy who was a spitting image of him, with a mop of dark brown hair and a smile cute enough to make a woman’s biological clock tick in overdrive. Cole and his wife, the little boy—the three of them were a gorgeous family.

A long time ago, she fantasized about being the woman on his arm in pictures like those. Growing up, all she saw were stars when she looked at him; he was perfect. She couldn’t help it, even when he didn’t know she existed as anything other than his little sister’s best friend. She’d been head over heels for a guy who had a trail of heartbroken girls in his wake, making him all the more desirable to a teenage girl. Despite the trouble her feelings for Cole had caused her over the years, she could smile about it now. She’d been so ridiculous in her youth, scribbling their names inside of hearts in her notebooks, going to bed at night wondering if tomorrow would be the day he’d smile at her. So long ago.

None of it mattered—not their spotty history, nor how long it’d taken her to get over him. He was off limits, and she was dead set on avoiding him for the next two weeks. And since Cole, she’d built a life around simplicity. Her gypsy soul was untethered and happy.

At least she wouldn’t run into Ellie on this visit. The last voice message she received from her mother had been to tell Jaden she was going to rehab. Again. Not a surprise. She hadn’t spoken with Ellie in three years. Jaden ignored every single call, sending it to voicemail. Most of those voicemails were deleted without being played. What was the point?

Ellie’s words from their last conversation all those years ago still stung: “YOU did this to me! I’m like this because of YOU. You owe me your LIFE. I would never abandon you like this, you little bitch!” She’d been coming down off of drugs when she’d called, wanting money for an attorney. Jaden hadn’t even asked what she’d needed an attorney for. A DUI? Drug paraphernalia? It wouldn’t matter. Ellie would never change. The last thing she spat into the phone before Jaden hung up was how she hoped Jaden got pregnant and that the “little brat” ruined Jaden’s life as she’d ruined Ellie’s. Three years was a long time to go without talking to one’s mother, but that had been the last straw—she’d had enough.

Jaden forced Ellie from her mind. She wasn’t here for her, and she didn’t have to worry about an uncomfortable or embarrassing reunion with her mother. She’d be long gone before Ellie returned from her stint at rehab.

CHAPTER THREE

Trey was still at the shop when Cole returned. He sat on a blue cooler beside his GTO, his ball cap perched sideways on his head as though he’d lifted it to cool his hair line. A bottle of beer was pressed to his lips.

When he finished swallowing, Trey said, “No black eye. That’s good.”

“No black eye.” But she’d made it clear she wasn’t interested; a huge disappointment.

Trey stood and lifted the lid of the cooler. He took out a beer and handed it to Cole. Ice water dripped down the bottle and onto the cement floor. “So, how does she look?”

Cole pictured Jaden, and his pulse picked up. “The same. Better. I don’t know. Good.”

“The one who got away.” Trey shook his head. “Made a mistake with that one. Should mean she’s fair game, right?”

“Forget it, man.” He sounded like a jealous ex, and supposed he was, in a way. There was so much regret when it came to Jaden—a past he couldn’t change; decisions he couldn’t come back from. And in the end, would he have made a different choice? Probably not. His dad had taught him that being a man meant accepting responsibility for your actions. Trying with Kensie had been the right thing to do.

He remembered the moment Micky was born; he cried as he held his baby in his arms. He was perfect, with his tiny pink fingers and button nose. He proposed to Kensie before they left the hospital. Being there for Micky had been the only option, and something he’d never regret. He hadn’t stopped trying, not until Kensie left town.

“Joking, man, you know that.” Trey cut into Cole’s thoughts. His friend was right—he was a moody fucker these days.

“Doesn’t matter. She’s not interested.” Despite that truth, he smiled. “She’s something else.”

Trey cocked his head and rolled the beer bottle between his hands. “You two have a thing, always have. If I were you, I wouldn’t let that go.” He raised his brows in critical regard. “Again.”

“She’s not staying long. A week or two.”

“Life’s a bitch, bro.” Trey knocked back another drink of beer. He lowered the bottle then said, “Speaking of bitches, your ex called while you were gone.”

Cole raised his brows, but didn’t argue. Kensie wasn’t the easiest person to get along with, especially the last couple of months. He knew why he’d dated her—rockin’ body, big breasts, and a pretty face. And she’d liked to party. Back then, so had he. They met after his dad died, and booze had been a big part of his life. Turned out he didn’t make the best judgment calls when he was drunker than piss, and having unprotected sex was on that list.