Authors: Shelley Shepard Gray
Both York and Melissa were staring at her, stunned. Though tears were streaming down her face, Hannah knew they deserved some kind of explanation. Still, she had never felt more unsure or afraid of what to do or say. “Aaron Kurtz grabbed me . . . because I wouldn't listen to him.”
“We need to get her inside,” Rob said. “And she needs some ice on her cheek. And maybe her arm. Melissa, could you look at her shoulder, too, before you leave?”
Melissa shuttled her inside. “Of course. Come on in, everyone. Yes, Rose, you too. Oh, Hannah! You poor thing.”
When the door closed, Rob told Rose to go lie down. Then the three of them escorted Hannah into the living room.
After Melissa motioned her to the couch, York crouched down in front of Hannah. “Do you need to go home?”
She shook her head. “I'm fine. You need to work and I don't want to be any troubleâ”
“Hannah, you're a part of our family! Caring about you isn't any trouble. Now, do you want to rest here for a few minutes, or can Melissa take you to our bedroom and look at your arm?”
Hannah glanced up at Rob. “Rob, you have gotten everyone spun up.”
Ignoring her comment, he asked softly, “What do you want to do? Rest or get looked at?”
When she realized that none of them was going to back down, she sighed. “We can go look at my arm.”
In no time, she was guided into the master bedroom. After Melissa closed the door, she said, “Where did that man grip you?”
“High on my left arm. Near my shoulder.”
After helping Hannah take off her sweater, Melissa looked at the row of pins holding her dress together. “Do you want to slip your arm out, then call for me, or do you want help?”
Hannah knew she would forever wonder what had possessed her to say what she did, but instead of seeking privacy, she simply said, “You can help me, if you don't mind.”
“Not at all.” Looking intently at her dress, Melissa slipped out the first pin, then the second. After Hannah helped her with the third, Melissa said, “This might be enough.” Then she helped Hannah ease the dress over her shoulder so only the cotton shift she wore underneath was visible.
Then she inhaled sharply. “Oh my goodness. You are quite bruised, Hannah. You've got several marks. They are going to be black and blue within an hour.” Gazing at her face, she said, “I'm afraid your eye's going to look worse, too.”
“I'll be okay.” But still she walked to the mirror and examined herself. There she saw what Melissa had. A full set of angry bruises marked her skin.
“Thank goodness Rob came along.”
“Jah.”
“Is she okay?” York asked from outside the door. “We're going crazy out here.”
“She's okay.”
“How bad is it?”
Melissa glanced at Hannah. “You are covered up, but we can put a throw on you, too, so only your arm is visible. You can let my husband see or not, it's up to you. But if you wouldn't mind, it would make him feel better. He's worried about you.”
“I don't mind. It's just my arm. Plus, he is a doctor.”
Melissa smiled. “He is, indeed.” But when she went to open the door, both Rob and York entered.
The moment Rob saw her state of undress, he stopped. “Sorry, Hannah. I'll wait outside.”
She wasn't shy, and well, it was just her arm. It was actually kind of humorous the way everyone wanted to inspect her but not be offensive. Holding out her arm, she said, “I don't mind if you want to see, too.”
He looked as if he was debating with himself, but eventually he stepped in behind York and glared at her bruises. “I'm so sorry, Hannah.”
“There is nothing to be sorry about. You didn't do anything,” she said as York passed Christopher to Melissa before carefully touching her bruises, then asked her to move her arm around.
Feeling self-conscious, she did as he asked. “See, I am going to be fine.”
York stepped back toward the door. “I think you're going to be sore. We should probably put a cold compress on your arm and your cheek. And give you a couple of pain relievers. I'll go take care of that.” He left down the hall, his footsteps sounding sure.
“We're going to take care of you,” Melissa said, jiggling the baby against her hip. “Come along, Rob. Let's let Hannah get put back together. Take your time, dear.”
When Hannah was alone, she closed her eyes. She felt anxious and exhausted. After giving into a bit of self-pity, she set her dress to rights, then went to the master bathroom and splashed water on her face.
Then, knowing the three of them were waiting for her, she opened the door.
Rob was leaning against the wall in the hallway.
“You didn't have to wait.”
“I wanted to.” Dark concern was etched in his expression. “I can't stop wanting to simply stare at you. To make sure you are all right.”
“He rattled me, but I'm fine, Rob,” she said gently as they walked into the living room where York and Melissa were waiting on her. Christopher was lying on his favorite quilt in the middle of the room.
“I wish I would have gotten there earlier.”
“This is as much my fault as anyone else's,” York said from his position on the couch. “I knew we should have been driving you back and forth from your house. From now on, we'll do that.”
Melissa nodded. “Hannah, why don't you take the rocking chair? I know how much you like to sit there.”
Hannah did as Melissa bid. The moment she sat down, Melissa handed her a soft, cold fabric packet. “Put this on your arm.”
Rob sat down across from her, his elbows braced on his knees. “Where can I find this guy?”
“Why?”
“I'm going to go talk to him.”
She could only imagine the commotion that would cause! “
Nee
. You canna do that.”
“I'm not going to hurt him, Hannah. But he needs to know that you are not alone.”
As his words sank in, she blinked. She wasn't alone, was she? She had Mr. and Mrs. Ross and Rob and her family. Paul was
gone but she had moved on, and she'd filled the hole he'd left with good, caring people.
Tears sprang to her eyes as she looked from Melissa to York and at last to Rob, who was so tense, it looked as if he was ready to spring into action to save her all over again. “I'm so blessed to have each of you,” she said.
Then, to her distress and dismay, she promptly started crying. Again.
Immediately, Rob rushed to her side. He practically picked her up and carried her to the couch, then curled his arms around her, enveloping her in the best of hugs. As Melissa sat on her other side and patted her back, Rob murmured, “You cry all you want. We're here, Hannah. We're here and we're not going anywhere.”
And so she did. Tears had never felt so cleansing.
A
aron felt as if his body belonged to a different person. Every time he looked at his hands, he remembered them hurting Hannah Eicher. And with that vision came a shame like he'd never experienced, overwhelming him.
Yet again, his temper had overpowered what he knew to be right. Because of that, he'd hurt a woman, this time in front of half the town.
He could only imagine the rumors that would fly after his outburst today. People would no doubt avoid him. It was no less than he deserved. No, he deserved far more than that. He should be shunned.
With deep regret in his heart, he walked down the quiet street toward Hope's house. He remembered that today was her day off and he was thankful for that. Otherwise she might have witnessed his horrible behavior, too.
Now he only had to tell her about it.
Her mother answered the door with her usual smile. “Aaron,
gut matin
! What a nice surprise. Hope will be so happy to see you.”
Taking off his hat, he glanced down the hall. “I need to speak with her, if I may.”
“Of course you may talk with her,” she said, concern clouding her eyes. “You know you never need to ask about that.”
“Danke.”
“Well, come in. Would you like a slice of pie? I know it's still morning, but it's apple and it's warm. I just made it.”
“I think it would be best if I talked with Hope out here, if she doesn't mind. I won't be staying long.”
“Of course.” She stepped back. “I'll go get her.”
Aron turned and took a seat in one of the white wicker chairs that decorated their wide front porch.
When Hope joined him, it was obvious that her mother had mentioned that he seemed agitated. Without a word, she closed the front door and sat in the love seat next to him. As usual, he couldn't get over how pretty she was. Today she had on a yellow dress. She was barefoot, too. She looked like a young girl. Actually, she looked like the girl he'd fallen in love with back when they were in school together.
For most of his life, he'd simply assumed that she would be his one day. His wife. The mother of his children. To his shame, he'd taken that for granted.
No longer, though, because now she was likely going to exist only in his dreams.
“Aaron, what's come over you?” she asked. “You're staring at me as if we were strangers.”
“I, uh . . . I was just remembering what you looked like when you were eleven.”
She wrinkled her nose. “I was gangly. All arms and legs. Please don't think of me like that.”
He smiled. “I liked you then, too.”
She smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes. “Why did you come over here?”
“I did something today that I need to tell you about.” Knowing there was no good way to be gentle about what he was about to say, he blurted, “I . . . I hit Hannah Eicher. On Main.”
She blinked. “What?” she whispered. “I'm . . . I'm afraid I don't understand.”
Unable to see the confusion and disappointment in her eyes any longer, he looked down at his hands, which were folded between his knees. “Ever since my father died, I've been having a difficult time with my temper. I start out the day all right, but then, little by little, I feel an anger I've hidden deep inside me break free. Before long, it's taken ahold of me.”
“I've never noticed that.”
“I've kept it hidden from you.” He forced himself to meet her gaze. She deserved to be spoken to directly and he deserved to observe her pain. “But, Hope, even though I've kept the worst of it from you, I haven't done the same with my family. I've lashed out at my sisters. At my brothers. Darla has gotten the worst of it. I've grabbed her too tightly. Bruised her. Said terrible things, hurtful things to her.”
Hope shook her head. “Aaron, that ain't you. I bet you are making it worse than it is.”
“
Nee
. I've been pretending I am better than I am.” As he at
last spied the dismay in her eyes, the sadness he had expected to see, he continued. “I've also been giving Hannah Eicher a difficult time.”
“Why?”
“Because she was doing better, I guess. She loved Paul, but she got a new job. She seemed happy. She was coping, while I wasn't. Today, when I was badgering her yet again, she told me that she didn't want to be near me anymore.” He took a calming breath. He didn't want to remember what had happened but he needed to be completely honest with someone. He knew it should be her. “When she pushed me away, when she rejected me, something snapped. I was so hurt. Frustrated. And then, before I quite knew what I was doing, I slapped her.”
Hope released a ragged sigh. “Oh, Aaron.”
Swallowing hard, he pushed on. “She has an English friend. He came to her rescue. He, well, I think if she hadn't been standing there, he probably would have slugged me. I would have deserved it, too.”
Hope closed her eyes for a long moment before gazing at him in concern again.
He saw everything he'd ever wished to see in her eyes. Compassion, care. Love. But instead of making him feel better, that sweetness made him realize how undeserving he was. He needed to earn her love and compassion again.
“Hope, I need to break our engagement.”
“Is that what you want?”
It wasn't what he wanted, but it was what needed to be done. There was no way he was going to risk hurting her. If he ever did that, he didn't know if he could live with himself. “I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I can't be the person you need me to be.”
Aaron got to his feet. Now that he'd done what he had to do, he needed to get away from her. Needed to get away from everyone and figure out how to make things right.
As he turned away and started down her front steps, he didn't look back.
But he couldn't help but notice her silence.
He tried to find comfort in the fact that she wasn't calling him back. He knew he needed time and he wanted to be glad that she was giving that time to him. But right then, he had never felt more alone in his life.
L
UKAS HAD JUST
finished reviewing a new contract to install cherry flooring in a Columbus office building when his door blew open.
“Lukas, you'll never guess what happened,” Rebecca announced as she rushed in.
Leaning back in his chair, he said, “How about I know that you entered my office yet again without knocking?”
It was a sure sign of how agitated she was that she didn't rise to the bait. “Aaron Kurtz grabbed Hannah Eicher on the street,” she said in a rush of words. “And then guess what? He slapped her! Just as me and Anne Miller and Jody Yoder were about to step in, some Englisher came running up with his big dog and came to her aid.”
Lukas blinked, sure he hadn't heard that correctly. “Say again?”
“You heard me. Aaron Kurtz hit Hannah Eicher.”
He was torn between throwing his head back in a sigh and pounding his fist on his desk. He settled for attempting to keep his emotions in check. He needed to think clearly. “This is
awful. Last time we talked, I thought he was going to attempt to change.”
“Well, he didn't,” she said as she plopped down on the couch.
“What happened?”
“I guess Aaron was yet again ranting about the fire and who knows what else and Hannah didn't want to hear it. Then, next thing she knew, he grabbed ahold of her arm, jerked her hard, and then slapped her cheek.”
Lukas felt physically ill. Pushing back from his desk, he stumbled to his feet. He knew Hannah; they all did. There wasn't a sweeter girl in Charm. His buddy Paul had been smitten with her for the past two years. Now, though it didn't really make any sense, Lukas felt like she was partly his responsibility since Paul had passed away. He felt like everyone who was suffering the consequences of the accident was his responsibility. Someone had to take ownership, and now that he ran the company, it might as well be him.
Oh, but he should have walked Aaron right over to the bishop. He'd been a fool to think that his threats had meant a single thing to Aaron.
“Is she okay?” he asked. “Where is she? Does she need me to call the doctor?”
Rebecca waved a hand, brushing off his concerns. “Don't worry, Lukas. If I was worried about her, I wouldn't be here in your office. I'd be at her side.”
“So she's okay?”
“I think so. Like I said, this Englisher friend of hers seemed to take care of things.” With a shake of her head, she continued. “You should have seen him, Luke. He was right in Aaron's face.
I thought he was going to hit him.” She sighed. “Anyway, once Aaron walked away, the man escorted her to Plum Street.”
Englishers lived on Plum Street. It was full of fancy brick houses, each on two-acre lots.
“Why there? He should have brought her home to her mother.”
“I thought the same thing, but Jody told me that Hannah works as a nanny for a doctor and a banker.”
Yet again, he was amazed by Rebecca's detective skills. “I can't believe you know so much.”
“It ain't anything, Lukas. Anyway, as soon as she went down Plum with that man, I had to come tell you.” She shook her head. “Poor Hannah, right?”
“
Jah
. For sure.” Crossing his arms across his chest, he thought about Aaron, thought about everything he'd tried that hadn't worked. “I wonder what I should do about Aaron now. If he's hitting poor Hannah, his violence has gone far enough.”
“He has really become unpredictable.”
He was just about to ask Rebecca to help him brainstorm some ideas when he saw Darla standing at the door. It was something of a shock. She hadn't been at the mill since the fire. Concerned, he took a step to greet her. “Hey.”
“Hi.” She looked from him to Rebecca, her eyes sad. “I guess you can imagine why I'm here.”
“Jah.”
“I'm sorry about Aaron,” Rebecca said. “I don't know what's gotten into him.”
“Where is he?” Lukas asked.
She shrugged. “I am not sure. Home, most likely.”
“I don't want you seeing him right now.” Lukas couldn't be
lieve he was saying it, but he was truly afraid for what might happen if Darla got in her brother's way.
“I know you are busy, but that's why I came,” Darla said. “I need someone to come with me when I go talk to him. He needs some help but I'm not sure how he's going to react to it.”
Rebecca stared at her. “I'll go with you.”
“Absolutely not,” Lukas said. “I'll go.”
After a moment's hesitation, Darla said, “You know, a year ago, I would have never imagined Aaron would act like this. We've always been different, but I never used to fear him. Now, I'm not only afraid of what he will do to me when he's angry, but who else he's going to hurt.” Her last words had come out in a tremor. “This . . . This is so awful,” she said as tears started to flow. “I feel like this is my fault even though I know it's not.”
“It's not,” Rebecca whispered. “This is Aaron's burden.”
As if Rebecca's comforting words had unlocked a dam, Darla started crying harder. “I'm sorry. I didn't come over here to fall apart on your couch, but I don't know what to do.”
Rebecca wrapped her arms around Darla, giving her a reassuring hug. When Darla pulled away, looking much resigned, Lukas crouched in front of her.
“I'll go over with you.” After sharing a meaningful look with Rebecca, Lukas added, “I'll get a couple other men, too.”
Darla's eyes widened in alarm. “Do you think that is necessary?”
“Maybe. I'm not afraid of being hurt but I don't want Aaron saying that I coerced him or threatened him in some way. We also need to meet with the bishop as soon as possible. If our church can't handle things, I fear the police are going to get involved.”
Darla closed her eyes. “This is so awful. My father wouldn't recognize Aaron right now.”
“I agree that he's not himself,” Lukas said as he got to his feet. “But the time to worry about overreacting has passed.” He was pretty certain he was going to do just about anything he could to put a stop to Aaron's behavior now.
Darla sighed. “I guess you are right.” As she edged back to the doorway, she added, “I feel like I've inadvertently put you in the middle of this. I'm so sorry.”
“I'm not. I don't want you facing anything by yourself ever again.”
Rebecca hugged Darla once more. “Don't worry about Lukas. This is what friends do. We help each other, through thick and thin.”
Steeling her shoulders, Darla nodded. “I hope we get to the thick part again real soon.”
Lukas reached out and brushed a finger along her soft cheek. “We will, I promise,” he said gently. “Now, you sit tight with Rebecca. I'm going to go get some help.”
“
Danke
, Lukas,” she mumbled.
Unable to help himself, he bent down and pressed his lips to her temple. “Never thank me for helping you.” Straightening, he winked, hoping to draw out a smile from her. “Don't forget, one of these days I'm counting on you to say yes when I ask you to marry me.”
When she smiled, he felt like he'd just done something pretty special.
He kept his smile in place until he was out of the room, down the hall, and out of her sight. Only then did he clench his fists
and lean his head against the wall in a mixture of frustration and anger. After allowing himself those few seconds, he forced himself to let it go. Anger would solve nothing.
Instead, he prayed to the one who could always be counted on. “Lord, I'm going to need You. Actually, I think a whole bunch of us are going to need Your help for the next couple of hours. Be with Darla and Hannah and Aaron and me, wouldja? We're going to need Your guidance in order to get through this day without making things worse.”