As I Close My Eyes (26 page)

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Authors: Sarah DiCello

BOOK: As I Close My Eyes
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What the hell? Your family is like the royalty of Scotch Plains.”

He let out a sigh, “I know, it’s excessive, but they’re really down-to- earth, I swear.”


Um, you could have told me sooner that you came from money. I mean, this is a bit ridiculous.”


I didn’t want to. I thought it would create a misperception about my upbringing and I wanted to start fresh.”


A misperception? I don’t think it’s a misperception at all. It’s like a slap in the face to see it firsthand. What does your father do again?”


He works for the government. I don’t know ... he never talks about it. I thought you would think I was some sort of snob,” responded Ben while taking in a deep breath, as if he was glad his dirty little wealthy secret was finally revealed.

Ben’s father arrived seconds later so there wasn’t any more time to question him about the polo matches and private tennis lessons that I was sure he enjoyed as a child. Maybe even as an adult.


So, Danielle. Ben tells me that you are a student at Gainesville State College,” said Ben’s father while he poured each of us a glass of Cabernet Sauvignon.


Yes. I’ll be going into my sophomore year there in the fall.”


How wonderful. What are you studying?”


Dad, enough with the twenty questions.” I was happy he interrupted because I wasn’t sure how to respond. I just wanted to figure out what was going on in my life this summer, let alone the agony of career decisions once I graduated.


Fine. You know your mom won’t be home until Sunday morning, but I thought maybe we could show Danielle the town tomorrow. We could go to breakfast at The Shack, then have Maryann make us lunch, and possibly invite some of your friends over for dinner.”


That sounds like a great idea,” I said, excited to finally meet some of the people Ben had spoken so fondly of. “Maryann?” I whispered to Ben, wondering who she was. Instantly, I had a picture in my mind of Ben as a 10-year-old playing in the backyard with Maryann announcing that it was lunchtime from the patio. What a privileged life he led.


No one knows I’m back, Dad,” said Ben.


Why, son?”


I just haven’t gotten around to calling anyone. Maybe I should go inside and see if they’re available tomorrow night.”


Use the phone in the kitchen. The one in the library isn’t working for some reason.”


Ok, Dad,” Ben said as he went inside to plan an impromptu party for the following day.

Ben’s father took a sip of his wine and continued to ask more questions. “Ben told me you met in his bookstore in Tallulah.”


Sort of. I saw him first at a restaurant there while I was vacationing with a friend of mine for the weekend. I came up the following weekend on my own and ran into him again.” I wasn’t about to explain to his father the infatuation I felt for his son the moment I saw him. I’d come off as a complete psycho and I was certain he’d make one phone call to someone named Vinny who’d have me whacked instantly.


Well, isn’t that exceptional?” said his dad as he stared up at the stars.

He was a strange person. Ben had never told me how socially awkward his father was. He didn’t make eye contact with me while he spoke and seemed uninterested, almost distant.


Your son is amazing and I feel very lucky to know him.”


I’m sure he feels the same way about you,” responded his father, gazing at the sky again. “You know, I felt these same feelings for Ben’s mother when I first saw her. Be careful about that kind of love, Danielle. It can get you into a lot of trouble.”


Oh, I’m not worried about that. Ben and I were meant to be together. I love him, Mr. Sheffield, and I hope that we’re together for a long time.”


That’s fabulous. I know he feels the same way about you,” said his father as he grabbed my hand in a gesture of acceptance. I wasn’t sure if my initial feelings about Ben’s dad were justified. He was hard to read.


It’s settled, everyone’s coming over tomorrow,” said Ben as he emerged from the kitchen.


How’d you plan that so fast?” I asked.


Word travels like lightning around here. Mama must have made a few phone calls because everyone I talked to already knew I was in town.”

We turned in for the night about an hour after finalizing the menu for tomorrow’s dinner and I felt butterflies again about meeting Ben’s mom for the first time.


Relax, everyone is going to love you. My father likes you more than he likes his own son, so you have nothing to worry about,” said Ben as he pulled up the covers of our bed and sank his body into the pillow-top mattress, wrapping his arms around my chest and his legs around mine.

I brought
Pride and Prejudice
with me and I thought I should read a few more chapters to help me fall asleep. I didn't get very far.

 

*  *  *

 

I was being carried out on a stretcher of some sort towards a horse and buggy with a faded red cross painted on the side. The steady bounce of those who carried me sent shock waves through my already depleted body. The carriage was parked just beyond the boardwalk where Robert and I walked that same afternoon and we couldn’t get there fast enough. I felt delirious, confused, and just plain sick.

Robert held something wrapped in a light yellow towel and I thought I saw a small hand emerge from the folds. Three men loaded me into the back of the carriage while Robert and the towel climbed into the front. I heard mumbling, but couldn’t make out the words.

It felt like I was back on the boat again, hearing the voices all around me, but not being able to make out what anyone was saying.

I looked down at the blankets placed on my body and saw blood - a lot of blood. I went in and out of consciousness, each time trying desperately to stay awake. Then, there was a cry. A baby’s cry from the front of the carriage. We stopped outside the doctor’s office and Robert rushed in before the horses came to a halt. As we entered, Robert ran one way and I was carried in another, then it all started to come back to me. He was holding our baby. Our baby girl. I felt the anxiety of Caroline and I wished I could somehow relay to her that everything was going to be okay. I desperately wanted to reach out and hold my baby. I wanted to see her face and look into her big eyes. I let the physical weight of the day take over me as I fell into a deep sleep.

 

 

Chapter 25

 

The cool New Jersey air floated through our bedroom in the giant house Ben called home. Three open windows in the back of the house overlooking the massive yard let in a breeze that gently floated across my face and told me I should open my eyes and start the day. Ben was just waking up.


You know, we won’t be able to sleep in the same room tonight. When my mother comes home tomorrow morning and sees us sleeping in the same bed, my father and I will have to answer to her, and that’s something we just don’t do,” said Ben as he rolled over, placed his arm around my waist, and kissed my neck.

I let out a laugh. “I wouldn’t want to offend the ruler of the house, so I’ll sleep wherever your father tells me to sleep.”


We could just set an alarm for about three in the morning and you could always sneak out of my room and go into yours,” Ben suggested with a devilish look on his face.

With that, he rolled on top of me and started a tickle fight I knew I’d lose.


Hey in there,” yelled a female voice in the hallway. “Get a room!”


We have one,” Ben yelled back.

I shot up out of the bed like a scared cat with my hair standing straight up, nervous that his mama decided to make an early arrival. In doing so, I proceeded to take all of the fluffy white covers off the bed with me in an attempt to hang on to something while falling onto the floor.


You must be Danielle,” said a woman who had to have been his sister since she held the hand of a small girl.


Um, yeah,” I replied as I carefully stood up so as to not lose the sheets I called clothes at the moment. “Sorry.”


Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me. If mom found out, you would both be dead and then I’d never have the hope of marrying Ben off so I’d have another woman in the Sheffield family beside her Royal Highness.”


Danielle, this is my sister, Sharon.” Ben dramatically motioned with a wide swing of his arm and a bow as he introduced each of us.


Nice to meet you,” I responded. “And you must be Leah,” I said to the small blonde girl who stood next to her mother.


Hmmm Mmmm,” Leah replied, shyly ducking behind her mother’s legs.


We’ll let you two get - ehem - dressed,” said Sharon. “See you downstairs, idiot.”


First I have to take care of something,” said Ben while he crawled under my pile of blankets, which caused me to let out a few giggles even though I was mortified at what he was doing in front of his sister and niece.


Time to leave, Shar,” Ben said as I hit him to get him to stop.


Close your eyes, sweetie,” said Sharon to her horrified daughter as they turned and quickly made their way into the hallway.

Ben finally crawled out from under the layers of cotton and we quickly got dressed, although I couldn’t quite seem to get my bra on since he kept taking it off every time I finally got it latched. “Knock it off, your family is waiting for us. I don’t want to look like the hired whore.”


I’m sorry, I just can’t keep my hands off you. Please don’t wear anything low cut today, I’m not sure I can stand it,” Ben said as he grabbed me once again and swung me onto the bed.


Benjamin,” I shrieked and pushed him back while I went to find the lowest cut shirt in my suitcase just to make him completely mad all day long.

Instead of a shirt, I decided on a white v-neck dress with an eyelet pattern so delicate you had to hold it up close to see. It was a gift my mama had bought for me and left in the bottom of my bag with a note that said:

 

Dear Dani Bear,

 

Since you may be meeting your future in-laws, I thought you should have something to make you stand out.

 

Love,

 

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