Bittersweet Hate (9 page)

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Authors: J. L. Beck

Tags: #Literature & Fiction, #Genre Fiction, #Coming of Age, #Romance, #Contemporary, #New Adult & College, #Two Hours or More (65-100 Pages)

BOOK: Bittersweet Hate
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“You’re going to be fine Mimi. I have your back, and I’ll be here for you.” She says softly.

“You’re my best friend Jenna, not my baby daddy. You didn’t get me knocked up.” I laugh harshly at my own pitiful excuse of a joke.

“Don’t do anything crazy Mimi. Don’t run, or make an irrational choice.”
A smile creeps onto my face pulling me from my thoughts. She knows me too well.

“You know me well
, but it doesn’t help the fact that all I want to do is run. I want to run away from these emotions I’m feeling.”

“Well you can’t… Plus why the hell were you not using condoms?” I roll my eyes at her comment. Since when did she get to act like my mom?

“Well Mom…” I reply my words heavily laced with sarcasm. “It wasn’t an initial thought at that, particular moment. I didn’t expect to have sex with him and then once we did have sex it just kept happening. Neither of us thought to stop and do something. I take responsibility for my actions and believe that everything happens for a reason, I just wish God would have waited till after college to drop a baby in my lap.”

“Yeah well you didn’t exactly inhibit him from doing so.” Jenna laughs gruffly at me.

“Whatever… I’m still scared Jenna.” The words leave my mouth, just as I hear the lock on the door clicking into the unlock position.

“I have to go.” I whisper fast, hanging up and cutting off whatever Jenna was going to say next. The door opens, and Corey walks in except he’s not alone, and I can’t help the complete look of disgust on my face when I take in Chelsea’s hideous smile.

“You didn’t tell me she would be here?” She purrs at him. Corey’s eyes never leave mine as he closes the door behind him.

“Go get your shit and leave Chelsea.” He grits out not even looking at her.

I glare at him as he advances on me causing me to step back and trap myself into a corner of the kitchen.

“If you touched that Corey I’m done.” He smiles, a full blown panty dropping smile, which would have me dropping mine right this moment if I wasn’t so full of emotions.

“Are you jealous?” He asks, his finger skimming across my bottom lip. I gaze up at him pissed off with myself for the response my body had to him and then even more pissed that, that bitch is here.

“Nothing to be jealous of, she comes nowhere near to the type of woman I am.” My voice is strong but inside I’m dying. I’m completely jealous, and scared. I’m afraid that she could pull the one thing that is a weakness to me away.

“I got my stuff, will you walk me back down stairs.” Chelsea says, coming out of his room with a bag. I cringe as her eyes eat up his body. The way she looks at him is the same way I look at him. Like he’s the world, like everything revolves around one singular thing.

“Nah. I need to talk to my girl here, you can show yourself out.” He responds, his eyes never looking away from me even though I’m watching her. Her face morphs from shock to disgust as she shoots daggers at me.

I hear her heels click across the floor and the door click closed before I raise my eyes back up to his.

“What was that about?” I ask ready to accuse him of just about anything. Every relationship needs trust. Clearly that is something Corey and I need to work on.

“I had some of her shit, I wanted it gone. I wanted her
gone; now she has absolutely no reason to talk to me.” He mumbles picking me up and placing me on the edge of the counter. I can see how fast this is going to go from talking, to kissing, to touching, and before you know it all that will be heard are his grunts and my muffled cries. As amazing as that sounds we need to be focusing on something else: The itty bitty thing in between us that he’s not yet aware of.

His lips find mine, as he
coaxes them open allowing himself inside. I try and pull back but he holds me in place nibbling on my bottom lip.

“I love it when you get a jealous and pull out the claws.” He whispers against my skin.

“We need to talk…” I try and say, but all
that comes out is, a moan mixed with words. His tongue swirls around just under my ear; his teeth gently nip at my earlobe. Even though I’m trying my hardest to fight against him I can feel my inside turning into a puddle. I can feel my core igniting into a fiery inferno waiting for its release.

“Corey…” I whimper as he pulls away to remove my pants and his. When he pulls his pants down I look down taking notice of the fact that one he’s not wearing undies
, and two, he’s fully erect and definitely waiting for me.

“You like what you see?” He asks, pulling my ass to the edge of the counter. My hands instinctively reach out to his chest to balance myself.
We stare into one another’s eyes. Watching one another’s emotions swirl with the others, reading each other as if we’ve been lovers for years. Our bodies call to one another’s and for one moment I allow my hands to explore his body. There’s no urgency to be done, and I know this will be as far from fucking as Corey will ever get. He wants slow and steady, passion and love. He wants to show me how much he loves me. With his hands, tongue, and well you know…

He prods at my wet entrance, pushing in so slow that it burns me… Our eyes never leave one another’s a
s we gaze deeply into each other. With each slow torturous stroke I feel the love, the peacefulness that I bring him.

“I…” Stroke. “Love…” Stroke. “You…” Stroke. “Mimi.” Stroke. “Jones.” Stroke. He continues with his pace and I lean my head against his shoulder my teeth biting into his flesh. He makes me feel
raw and gritty like a wound that keeps opening because it’s continually rubbed.

“I’ll always…” Stroke. He pulls out... and rubs me gently between my folds. I let out a loud screech my lady bits feeling way over sensitized. I sit back confused as to why we’re stopping and then I remember nothing.
The confusion, sadness, and being scared is all forgotten, and all that remains is the things that Corey can do with his teeth and tongue on my clit.

I scream out, my release hitting me hard. I come not once, not twice, but three times on his face. He feast
s on me, as if I’m an ice cream cone. It’s sensual, his tongue scraping against me as his fingers dig into my thigh, as he holds my legs into place. He keeps pushing me over the edge. I reach out trying to pull myself from his hold, the pleasure almost turning to pain.

“No… I can’t handle anymore.” I pant, trying to close my legs. He nips hard on m
y clit and my legs instinctively come apart. I can almost see the smile on his face.

He gives me a
thorough lick and comes back up holding me firmly against his chest.

“Did you
come?” I ask yawning.

“Shh...” He says putting his finger to my lips. My eyes fall closed as I feel him lay me on the bed. All I can think about is if he’s this gentle with me how would he with a baby, our baby?

             

Baby Got Back

 

When I awake the next morning I’m surrounded by enormous warmth, and Corey’s loud snoring. I roll over into his body, and muffle my laughter as I take in his open mouth, and drool dangling from his lips. Even in his most dishelmed manner he still looks like a million bucks.

I take this time to look him over, drinking in every curve of his body. Looking at him is something I could do every day all day long. He’s an edible master piece with his mangled brown locks, and deep brown eyes. He’s built like a house, and has the muscles to prove it. Once my eyes reach his face, I see two brown orbs staring back at me.

Automatically I blush, because one I have been caught and two how long has he been watching me. Jesus.

“Hey, don’t be shy about it. I love it when you admire what’s yours.”
I smile; knowing that all of this will be short lived. Worry must show in my eyes because he pulls me in closer to his body.

“I need to tell you something.” I say, pulling back from his warm embrace.

“Go ahead.” He retorts, a worry wrinkle forms on his forehead and I know after I tell him what I’m going to that there is just absolutely no way he won’t have more of those.

I take a deep breath, telling myself that I can do this.

“Don’t freak out, but…” I take a deep breath. “I’m pregnant.” I softly say, it’s almost so soft that it isn’t heard. However from the bulging eyes and mouth dropping Corey is doing I know he’s heard me.

“Are you sure? I mean how does that even happen?” His mind looks blown, and his voice is panicky. I can see
it; I know what he’s going to do. He’s going to run, just like I was.

“Well… you stick your thing in me, we go to down without protection I might add, and then abracadabra you have a baby.” Sarcasm drips heavily from my words.

He looks up at me then back down at his hands. When his eyes land on mine again, it seems as if he’s looking right through me. I’m losing him, I just know it. I reach out to hold him in place hoping that my touch will make him stay.

“We can do this Corey. We love each other, I mean we have done some pretty bad shit to one another but this is a blessing. Our blessing.” I grab his hand putting it on my midsection. Praying he can see through it all.

He pulls his hand back as if he’s been stung. A look of disgust mares his face. “I don’t want a baby Mimi. I don’t want anything. I can’t… I can’t be a dad. I can’t do any of this with you.” He pulls away, rolling out of bed.

“You got me pregnant. This is your responsibility too. If you think for one fucking second you can leave me and walk out on us you
better pray I don’t find your ass. Step up Corey. I tried to take it easy on you, but this is real. This baby is yours.”

He laughs, not the kind that would cause butterflies to flutter in my stomach, but the kind that makes me feel like acid rain is washing over me.

“I’m not cut out to do this with you. How do you even know if you’re…?” He hesitates obviously not knowing how to approach the world ‘pregnant’. “How do you even know you’re pregnant?” He spits out.

I roll my eyes at him, because seriously if he has to question that… I feel myself wanting to lurch out and punch him.

“Well, my period never showed, so I went and bought a test, peed on it and it said congratu-fucking-lations you’re going to be a mommy. However, I wish it would have come with a damn manual on how to tell men.” I know I’m not being very serious about the situation, or the fact that it seems as if he’s shocked, but come on what do you expect when you have sex without a condom?

“I get that… but this… it can’t be real.” He mumbles slipping into his pants.

“Well it is… very real. In roughly nine months a baby is going to be here.”

He shakes his head as if trying to make the situation go away. As much as I know he would like it to it’s not going to go away, it’s never going to be the same now. I can feel him piecing the walls around his heart back together. He’s shutting me out and there isn’t anything I can do about it.

Tears prick to the surface as I try my hardest not to let them fall. “Don’t shut me out Corey. I can’t do this alone.” I try to make my words sound strong but can’t with so much weighing on me.

I look up at him and see the contemplation going on. I see the unsureness and fear in his eyes. He opens his mouth to say something and then closes it again.

“You can do this
Corey; you’re not your father. I believe in you.” I try and say anything that I can to make him stay to be with me. He’s the glue to us, to everything.

The suddenly, it’s as if a mask has been pulled over his face. The Corey I had grown to know over the months is replaced by someone I don’t know.

“That baby isn’t mine; you and I both know it. Secondly, I am my father. I’m not a one man relationship kind of guy…” His voice is so stern and filled with so much anger and venom.

The tears stream down my face. Anger surges through me, who the fuck does he think he is. This is what people do when they’re fearful they spit words in an attempt to get the others to leave.

“I know you’re afraid, but so am I.” There’s a moment of silence as I wipe the tears from my face.

“That’s fine
, but you can be afraid alone. I’m afraid of nothing, and most definitely not some girl I had a fling with.”

Some girl? Everything he has said up to this point has hurt yes, but to call me some girl? I’m not some girl, I’m Mimi fucking Jones and I will make sure he never forgets it.

“I’m not some fucking girl, Corey.”

“Yes you
are. We fucked, it was hot, it was great, you’re an awesome lay, but that’s all you’ll ever be to me.”

He pulls his shirt on before
I can even mutter another word, to in shock by his admission to really say anything. Does he really expect me to believe him? His words?

“Leave. Get out.” I scream not wanting to have a fucking thing to do with him right now.

“I will and I won’t be back. I don’t want to hear a fucking word about that baby, or about you. I don’t want to be a part of your life. The person you thought you knew isn’t me. This is me.” He yells, down the hall. I hear the front door slam and three things sink in:

1.
              I’m going to be a mother.

2.
              Cory never truly loved me.

3.
              I’m completely and utterly alone.

 

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