Bound (Bound Hearts #1) (22 page)

“Don’t you hear me talking to you little girl.” I cringed at the nasally, snake like timber of his voice. He spoke nothing
, but venom and hateful lies. “Sure don’t look like a little girl anymore. All curves. Looks like you sure filled out real nice.”

Inhale.

Exhale.

Count to three.

Don’t let it get it to you.

He’s only doing this to hurt you. I
thought. Either confront him, or walk out your ass out of this door and don’t stop until you’re home in Georgia.

“I could remember real well how good you feel. Now that-

“Don’t.” Heart racing. Nerves tingling. I only fought him once before.

∞ Ten years ago…

“Mom! For once! Please stand up for me! It’s a night where all seniors stay at the high school. Our last bye before adult hood! What
’s so wrong with that?”

I looked from my mother who was scared shitless of displeasing her husband, to my father whose face was beginning to get redder.

“She doesn’t make the decisions in this house, Adelaide Claudette. You wanna scamper around all night with boys? Playing a little tease and whore for them? If it’s an all-night affair? What do you plan to sleep in? You’re going to get naked, and change there?”

“It would be in the girl’s locker room. No boys are allowed. It’s only one night. I never get to do anything! Why can’t you be reasonable?!”

The next thing I knew, I was in the living room corner, holding my flaming red cheek.

“You dare
you talk back to me? Peggy, get dinner started. I need to speak to Adelaide alone.”

I looked
to where my mother stood, looking at me as if I was nothing. A pebble in her shoe. “Mother! Why can’t you love me, and protect me? You know what he’s been doing to me! Help me for once in your life!”

Void of
any emotion, she whispered, “You were a mistake.”

“NOW!” My father screamed and she scurried out of the room.

A mistake?

“Yes. You were a mistake. When your mother came here on that mission trip during that disaster almost thirty years ago, she wasn’t with me. She was seeing this chump from her home town. She got stupid enough to get herself knocked up. I felt sorry for her and thought she was pretty enough that if she wanted, being a preacher’s son, I would offer my hand so she wouldn’t go to hell, burning in fiery ash for being a whore and spreading her legs before she married. I would have preferred a son of course, but we got landed with you. You are beautiful
, just as she was at that age. You’ve been living in this house for free. Maybe that should change.”

“I don’t understand. Free? What you’ve been making me do to you? All those disgusting
, vile things? What has does that have to do anything with me going to project graduation? Every senior will be there. I just want to have some fun.”

“Fun? So
, you lust after the boys in school, just as your mother did with that chump?”

“NO! Of course not!”

“Are you so sure? You’re awfully adamant about going to this overnight party.”

“It’s at school. There’s nothing wrong with that. Teachers will be there. Parents! Even the principal. There’s gonna be games, prizes, food! I’m going! You can’t stop me. For once, let me have fun! You say you’re a man of God
, but all you do is bully and hurt and torture the ones you’re supposed to love and protect. You’re a monster. I hate you.”

I covered my f
ace as he tried punching it, and he ended up missing and landing the punch on my shoulder. He then starting kicking. He pulled me to stand-up by my hair, and shoved me against the wall as he got real close behind me.

“You really wanna go to this ‘party’? Hmm. You’re not my daughter, it really wouldn’t be the same as if you actually shared my blood. I should make sure you’re not going to give something to the little boys sniffing around you. We wouldn’t want you to end up like you’re whore mother, would we? I’m going to make sure you remember what your consequences will be.”

Oh. My. God. This isn’t happening to me, I thought.

He pressed his front against my back. My dress was long
, but the material was loose and thin. I felt his penis against my behind and he rubbed himself against me.

“Just like your mother. You’ll do as I say. When I say. No buts,” he leaned in close to my ear and whispered, “Unless I’m poking this one,” and his hand rubbed and squeezed my backside
, as his manhood rubbed against me. “No excuses. You understand? Oh, and you try telling anyone? I’ll make sure no one believes you. I’m a pastor remember? A man of faith and God. Everyone in this town looks up to me. You’re nothing, but a whore’s mistake.”

Then a palm pressed against my breast
, and he squeezed me roughly as his hand descended towards my pelvic area. No. This is happening to me. He already made me do shameful, vile things, I wasn’t going to let him take something that wasn’t his. I took a deep breath, quieted the sobs and reared back my head and slammed it into his head.

“Argh! You little bitch.” I started running towards the front when he grabbed ahold of my arm and I took what strength I had
, and whipped a punch to his face. My knuckles hurt something bad. When he let go, I grabbed my little purse and sweater from the table in the foyer, and I ran out the door.

The first part of that evening, I remembered walking around. Trying not to be noticed. The back hand to my face wasn’t so hard that it would leave a bruise. There was only a
little redness to my face but that could be excused for the sun shining so bright on a hot summer day.

∞

I turned back to face my every waking nightmare. “You don’t scare me. You’re nothing
, but a sick, perverted pedophile. You know what God does to men like that?” His face was getting redder. There was a sheen of sweat at the temple of his forehead. “He burns them. Straight to hell. But don’t worry. I forgive you, because I’m supposed to. I’m not afraid of you. Not anymore. You can’t hurt me.”

I turned and walked out that
back door. I didn’t need to justify my life to this man. He was nothing to me. Not my father. Not my pastor. Not anyone, but a bad memory. When I got the script ‘Never Forget’ on one wrist and ‘Always Forgive’ on the other, I got it in mind just for this. Never to forget my past, but learn to always forgive those who trespass against me.

I started walking towards the vehicles when I saw Courtland, JR, his mom and dad
, along with a few townsfolk talking around the BBQ pit, laughing and having a good time. Courtland looked up and our eyes caught, faltering my steps. I knew he saw the terror in my eyes and I knew my body was shaking uncontrollably. He started walking towards me when I shook my head ‘no’ frantically.

I needed to leave. Right this instant
, before I did something that would ruin the lives of every person in this town.

He froze, looking at me with concern and all the love I knew he felt for me. Why couldn’t I say it back? He told me he loved me. I knew he was waiting for me to say it back to him
the other night. I even opened my mouth to say it, but-something stopped me. I felt trapped. Instead of speaking a word, I broke down. In unconceivable sobs. Gut wrenching to the core, letting it all out sobs. I wrapped myself around Courtland in that moment. For that alone, I trusted him more than anyone else. Even more than Gram. (She never knew what Geoff did to me that summer, or that he beat and raped my mother whenever it pleased him to do so, she is she had? She would probably commit murder).

Courtland had opened up in a way I never thought he would. Telling me about his mother. About his youth before Joe, and how Joe basically rescued him from himself. It was that trust he gave me
, to see he trusted me with the worst of himself.

Could I do that? Could I tell him everything that happened to me and he still love me? Or was I too dirty? Too damaged? To unclean?

His back stood straight and that got JR’s attention. I saw JR asking Courtland something and they all looked my way. Gram was furiously making her way towards me. She saw I was at my limit. I never told her an ounce of my life before coming to Georgia. I had nightmares. Times where I woke up screaming and clawing at myself. She told me if I couldn’t tell her, to try and get help. I was seventeen and I wanted to lash out, but I did take her advice, eventually. She always said I could trust her. I knew I could. I did. But some things, weren’t meant for a good persons ears. Gram was everything kind and sweet in this world. A little New York rebel, wrapped up in a Georgia Peaches world.

Gram rubbed my shoulder and said, “Look there baby-girl.”

Even as JR, his family and Courtland were making their way towards me, they all faded when I knew what I was going to face. Publically. I turned and our eyes met. His with malicious hateful intent, mine with a strength that was fading.

I saw
him
standing outside the door with my mother. He was looking at me with controlled rage, but also with lust. I was sick to my stomach already.

“Baby-
girl? Do
not
let him get to you. Did you say your peace?”

“I think so.” I whispered.

“Did you get what you needed to say out?”

“Not really
, but I’ll be okay.”

“Shug, no you won’t. There might be dozens of people here
, but that man needs to know how badly he hurt you. Before I do something, like run him over with the car.”

“Gram?! How did-

“Those nightmares? One of the times I stayed in your bedroom, to see if I could calm you? You kept saying, ‘please daddy stop. That hurts daddy. Why me daddy? Please leave me alone tonight.’ And Adelaide? It took every ounce of strength I had, not to come here and kill that sick son of a bitch with my bare hands. You go tell him how wrong he was. You be strong. You are stronger than that man. God will take care of him when it’s his due. You did
nothing
wrong. You’re about to do,
nothing
wrong.”

Geoff was
walking towards a few townsfolk and something suddenly came over me. Gram was right. I didn’t deserve what happened to me. I didn’t do anything wrong. My nerves were shot and I was on my last bit of strength when I clinched my fists, let the mad take over and I marched right up to him.

“Pastor Hunter?”

He turned and smiled his fake ‘can I help you’ smile, when I swung back and let go with everything I had. I felt something crack in my hand, but seeing his nose bleed, gave me more pleasure than thinking about the pain in my hand.

“I’m turning you in.”

“How dare you Adelaide Claudette Hunter!” Someone in the background called out.

The town’s people were rallying against me and supporting my father. Uncle Chet came between us and looked from
him
to me with questions burning in his gaze.

I could feel the heat of Courtland standing behind me. He didn’t touch me and I was glad for that. I don’t think I could say what I was about to say
, if he was trying to give me comfort.

“Turn him in for what, Addy?”

I couldn’t look Uncle Chet in the eyes. Even though they had different colored eyes, their faces were the same and I just couldn’t bring myself to hate the face standing between my enemy, and me.

“Ten years ago, that night when I got arrested
for trespassing with Courtland? Actually before that-as a girl, he beat me. When I turned sixteen, he-,” I couldn’t say it. I already felt the vomit chasing my throat, ready to come up. I took a deep breath, swallowed and continued, “Made me do things to him. But that night, he told me I wasn’t his blood daughter and I should pay for living in his house for nothing. Not with money, or chores either.” I could hear Aunt Maggie’s gasp ringing out loud, along with several others. I didn’t know if they believed me or not, but I knew the truth. The way Uncle Chet’s eyes were hardening, I hoped he was believing me. JR scooted closer to my side. I knew could always count on him. “Then when he came and picked me up from the courthouse, he forced himself on me and almost every day for the rest of that summer. Remember he never wanted me to have a job, but I had to make money somehow. I had to get away. I paid for it every time I got home from work that summer. With my body. I don’t care if none of you believe me. I know what happened to me should have never happened. It’s the truth as I’m standing before you now.”

I looked at Aunt Maggie,
and she was sobbing into JR’s arms. “I am so sorry for ruining your birthday BBQ. It was rude and I know the timing of this is highly inappropriate, but it’s done. I apologize.” I shifted my eyes to my uncle, but I couldn’t look at him straight on. I focused on the house behind him when I spoke to him. “I never could look you straight in the eye, Uncle Chet. I am so sorry. I can’t. At least, not right now. You were very kind to me. Once since I turned sixteen, I just couldn’t look at you without seeing
him
and I was too ashamed to-“

“Don’t. You don’t ever apologize to me. Or anyone.”