Read Code Name: Kayla's Fire Online
Authors: Natasza Waters
“They’re just scars, Thane.” He wasn’t groping her with lust. He held
her weighted breast, but more so her heart. He’d always held it in his hands,
but he’d squeezed the life out of it when he made love to Zara. No matter the
reason, she felt abandoned. Hope had vacated the premises of her heart when the
princess told her she and Thane had been intimate.
Kissing her shoulder, her skin rippled like a horse when a fly lands
on its back. Thane turned her, and without pausing, his lips were on hers. It
wasn’t a gentle kiss, it held heat and need. His fingers threaded through her
hair, deepening the kiss. Her heart twisted, demanding his strength, but unable
to release the bitterness. She pulled away, trying to steady a spiking
heartbeat.
“I love you, Kayla. That isn’t going to change. Nothing will change
that.”
“Thane, we have an agreement.”
“That agreement didn’t include how I feel.” He paused, his eyes racing
across her face. “We’re having a son. One we made making love.”
“I know, I was there, remember.”
A smile curved his lips. “I do remember. I remember how important that
moment was to me,” he whispered. “And then I screwed it up by saying something
stupid.” He shook his head. “I never make mistakes, but I’ve made one after
another with you. For some reason I can’t think straight when I look in your
eyes.”
“Or any other woman’s,” she shot back, feeling the bite of deception.
Up until now, she’d mostly had regret, but anger bucked both back legs. She was
a rational woman, and she accepted the circumstances pushing him and Zara
together, so why was she angry?
“Kayla, look at me.”
She stared up at him, hoping her resistance shone clearly in them, and
tightened her fists against her sides. She wanted to hit him—hard.
“You’re the only woman I’ve made love to.” Before she could back away,
he kissed her again, and then backed away himself. “Are you all right with a
boy?” he gazed at her worriedly.
“Do I have a choice?” she asked, the sourness not totally gone.
He cleared his throat. “Guess not.”
The fact was she did feel differently. Would he grow up to look like
Thane? Would he want to be like his father? Of course, he would, and he would
cause no end of worry for her. Her thoughts stilled, realizing she was
projecting a future with her in it.
Dr. Plymouth stuck his head around the door. “Would you mind joining
me in my office?”
That didn’t sound good. “Doctor would you please have a look at…Sid’s
back. He was hurt and there’s some infection.”
Dr. Plymouth nodded.
Thane stalled. “It’s not a problem, Doc. No need.”
“There’s three people in this room and one of us has gone to med
school,” he said, motioning to the examination table.
Thane sighed and pulled his shirt over his head. This time it was she
who read the doctor’s eyes. His brows quirked. “Yes it’s badly infected.” He
scribbled on a pad. “Fill this. Pharmacy is two doors down,” he said, laying
the paper beside Thane. The doctor treated the wound and then bandaged it
again. Now the grimace on his face wasn’t hard to miss.
Chapter Twenty-Three
When they settled in his office, Dr. Plymouth gave them both a lengthy
gaze. “Who are you people? Those are gunshot wounds on your back, Mr. Adams, or
are you going to share your real names with me?”
Thane grazed his bottom lip. “Sid Adams is good.”
“Sid,” he said, obviously not believing him. “Your wife has, although
healed for many years, knife wounds littering
her
back.” He landed a look on her. “There’s also scarring in your
womb, Marie. That would come from abuse—a lot of it. Years of it from the
amount I can see. That tells me that it was forced entry. Repeated rape.” He
stared at her, but his sternness altered to empathy. “I’ve seen this in severe
cases of sexual child abuse.”
Thane actually flinched and breathed out deeply through his nose.
“Delivery is going to be difficult and might call for a C-section.
There’s also another problem.”
Thane sat bolt upright. “What problem?”
“Marie, if that’s your name,” he paused waiting to see if she would
correct him. When she didn’t he said, “Are you even married?”
She shook her head.
“Are you a couple?”
She began to shake her head again when Thane said, “Of course we are,
and I’m the father. Now tell us what’s wrong.”
Doctor Plymouth turned one of the pictures in his hand to face them,
pointing at a fuzzy line. “The umbilical cord didn’t form correctly, probably
due to the scar tissue. There could be a host of issues associated with that,
but I’m not seeing any signs of them yet. I need to see you monthly, Marie,
until the baby comes to term. Now I’m being honest with you, and I would hope
you would do the same for me.”
Thane looked for acquiescence. She nodded.
In short order, Thane explained who they were, how they got the scars,
and why they weren’t being honest. With as few words as possible, the doc had
the whole picture. Thane ended by saying, “We’re not married, but she’s my…he
ground his molars together. “We’re…she’s…” Thane let his gaze crawl across the
ceiling. “She’s my girlfriend.” His gaze landed on the doctor with a hard
thump, daring him to question a thing, which he didn’t.
“I see. Kayla, you’re thirty-seven, which is fine, but you do have to
take more care. Not carrying a child to term before has its own issues. You
will have to be diligent about diet. Exercise and Lamaze will be imperative for
you. If you don’t want to join in with a class and I can understand why, then
take this,” He reached in a drawer and brought out a disc. “Practice with her.
I assume you will be there when the baby is born?” he said to Thane.
“Of course I will.”
“Not necessarily,” she said at the same time.
Thane’s eyes burned hot, when he took the DVD the doc held out to him.
“Thanks, Doc.”
“I want to see Kayla next month and you next week.”
“Me?”
“If I don’t see an improvement, I have to give you a stronger
antibiotic. That infection is bad. If you were a horse I’d shoot ya.” He
finally allowed a small grin.
“Yeah, all right, I get it,” Thane said.
“You should. That must be god-awful painful. Do you want any
painkillers?”
“Nope.”
“Not surprised.” The two men looked at each other. “My cousin is Dean
Witherby.”
“Team Seven,” Thane said before Dr. Plymouth could explain further.
“That’s right. He’s a hard-ass too. Haven’t seen him since the last
family reunion.”
“If you do, don’t mention us.”
“No, I won’t.” Dr. Plymouth rose and extended a hand. “See you next
week.”
“Thanks for your help, doc.”
“Kayla, you need to do that Lamaze training, no exceptions.”
“She will,” Thane answered for her.
Dr. Plymouth walked them to the door. “I’m curious Kayla, did you
receive any treatment other than physical after your child abuse or your
attack?”
She paused at the door. “No, I’m handling it.”
“No, she’s not,” Thane said on top of her. “She’s supposed to be
seeing someone at the base, but we can’t go back there. She hasn’t had PT
episodes for a while, but….”
The doctor landed a softened look on her. “I’m licensed in psychology as
well. Will you see me next week? I’d like to speak with you about what
happened.”
“Maybe,” she said and walked out the door.
“She’ll be here, doc, and so will I.”
* * * *
After picking up a few groceries, filling Thane’s prescription and depositing
them in the car, he closed the trunk and slid his fingers through hers. Taking
another scan around the town, he said, “Let’s take a walk.”
Without her agreement, he pulled on her hand, almost playfully, and
guided her toward a tiny park. Shade trees spaced evenly apart, bordered a
large grassy field. A few toddlers played on the slide while their moms talked
and watched at the same time. The swing set sat empty and Thane drew her in
that direction. Holding the chains, he beckoned with his eyes for her to sit.
“You want me to fit my behind in that little canvas strap?”
“Yes, and I’ll be right back.”
She watched him stride across the field with his easy gait. The women
weren’t watching their children any longer, but her captain instead. Thane
disappeared into a little café and returned a few minutes later, a boyish grin
on his face, and his hands filled with two tall styrofoam cups.
“Chocolate for you,” he said giving her a charming smile.
“What is it?” She sucked on the straw. Milkshake? “Mmmm.” Nope it
wasn’t a milkshake, it was heaven in the form of a milkshake.
When the children saw what they had, they started harping at their
mothers in unison, who gathered their children to take them for dessert. “You
did that on purpose, didn’t you?”
“What’s that?” he said with a grin, and circled behind her, giving her
a little push on the swing, and then another, until she raised her feet. “We’re
going to be spending a lot of time in places like this. Just thought we’d test
it out.”
“Give it up,
Sid
,” she drawled,
hanging onto the chain with one hand, and having another glorious sip of the
cool, thick drink.
“My mom used to bring us to the park all the time. We loved it. Dad
built us a fort in the backyard, and my brother and I helped him. Having time
with Dad was important to us when he was home.”
“Mine didn’t.”
Thane caught her around the bottom bringing her to a stop. “I bet you
wished he did, and I think,” he swallowed. “I think you want to hold your son’s
hand and bring him to the park. I want to see that. I want all those pictures
in an album, his first steps, his first smile. I want us to take him to the
beach, and teach him to swim.”
When she tried to get up, he stopped her.
“What are you really afraid of, Kayla?”
“I’m not afraid of anything,” she said staring at an old Ford passing
by, smoke puffing from its exhaust like an old timer wheezing out air. “You
were sitting right beside me. Did you miss the part when the doctor said the
umbilical cord is damaged?”
“He also said there was no sign of problems, and there won’t be.
Kayla, stop painting gray strokes on our future.”
Her attention shot to him. “Nothing is ever fine. You bump into a
wall, change direction, bump into another. I just have to keep putting one foot
in front of the other until it’s over.”
Thane’s expression saddened, and he stared down at the ground, then
knelt before her. “Is that how you’ve lived your life?” He grasped her hand and
brushed her fingers. “Sweetheart, there’s more, and even though, up until now,
you had big hurdles to jump over, you landed on your feet. This isn’t a hurdle,
this is a second chance.”
“Thane, you’re dreaming if you think he’s going to survive. Come on,”
she said standing up. Talking about this was ridiculous, and she wasn’t in the
mood for stupid dreams.
“You still don’t trust me, do you? So you’re trying to beat me to it,
and make this end in failure.” A swell of anger stiffened his shoulders. “You
think I’m not committed to you.”
“Oh, I know you’re committed—to the head between your legs, and we
already know where that’s been, Captain.” She dumped her milkshake into the
green garbage bin sitting cockeyed on the dirt beside the swing, and she wished
she could dump him there as well. “Next time, I’ll drive myself to the
appointment.”
Tensing, he said, “I was thinking I should be there for the session.”
“Says who?”
“Me,” he said sharply. “The doc knows enough about us, he doesn’t need
to know the whole story, especially one that’s not over.”
There it was. Thane was about as transparent as a twenty-foot sheet of
glass. “Are you jealous of Dr. Plymouth?”
His expression curled. “Of course not, why would I be jealous? He’s
your physician. He’s going to monitor you and our son, and then talk to
you…it’s not a date.” Thane swallowed and his Adam’s apple bounced hard.
“You’re jealous?”
“Did I miss something? Just cause he’s a fairly decent-lookin’ guy
doesn’t…why the hell did you smile at him like that?” he blurted.
“Like what?”
“You damn well know like what. When you smile at a guy it lights up
the room. You can bring a man to his knees with that smile of yours.”
“Look who’s talkin’ Mr. Two-faced, back-stabbing, son of a bitch.”
Thane took two strides to stop her from walking away. “Get it out,
Kayla. Say it. There isn’t anything you can call me I haven’t called myself already.”
“How about forked tongue, lying bastard,” she yelled at him.
Holy shit where did that come from?
Thane’s eyes sparked with anger. “I didn’t want to do it. There is a
difference. I know the difference, but you can’t seem to accept that. You’ve
never had faith in me. Why the hell is that?”
“I had faith—for about two days, and then you were making love to
another woman. You’ll have a great excuse for the next woman with six-foot-long
legs that comes along too.” The children and their mothers sauntered down the
sidewalk, hands filled with their treats. She’d never have that. She’d never
have normal, and she’d come so close. Why did fate decide at the last minute to
rip it away from her? “I hope it felt good. I hope you came so hard your head
blew off.”
“I didn’t make love to her, Kayla. I didn’t finish…”
Cutting him off before he could go into detail she didn’t need, she
said, “What happened, did you get bored after screwin’ her three times or did
you get caught crawling through the silk curtains of the maid’s quarters?”
Thane’s jaw clenched tighter than a bear trap.
“Sphinx got your tongue.”
Finally, he craned his head. His blue eyes darkened to a turbulent
sea. With measured words, he said, “I told you I came home a day after I woke
up.”
“I don’t want my son anywhere near your pompous princess.”
“I did what I had to do to keep us alive. The mission is over. That’s
all it was to me, a mission.” Thane concentrated on the road holding his
emotions in check. “What about Lapierre? You made love to him. I have to live
with that, and I hate it. It’s all I can see in my head when he’s around you.”
“I didn’t even know you then.”
“No, but you didn’t do a damn thing when he showed up in the camp, and
had his hands all over you. You didn’t stop him from pawing you every chance he
got when he was here.”
“You ended that pretty quickly, didn’t you?”
“Damn straight, and I’d do it again. I’m not going to back down while
he tries to lure you away from me. Why didn’t you tell Zara to hit the fucking
trail when she was spouting her bullshit?”
She folded her arms. “You want me to fight for someone like you. Me?”
She pointed at herself. “This is a mistake.”
“Our child is not a mistake, dammit! I fucked up, all right? I fucked
up royally in Syria, but our son is not a mistake. Making love to you was never
a mistake. I could have worn protection, but I didn’t, because I wanted forever
with you. When we made love the first time, there was no doubt in my mind I wanted
you, and a baby if we made one. Crazy, I know, what guy in his right mind would
want that, right? Me, I wanted that, with you.”
Setting her eyes on the scenery, she refused to listen.
“Get it out, Kayla. Tell me how much it hurts. Tell me you hate me.
Wipe the slate clean.”
“I don’t hate you,” she said, her bladder beginning to twinge. “I want
you to get on with your life, and I’ll get on with mine. That’s how we’ll wipe
the slate clean.”
“My life is with you.” He folded his hand over hers. “Kayla, I’ve
never strayed from that.”
That was it.
“Are we playing word games now? What do you call it when you have sex
with another woman, Captain? No—you didn’t stray, you had an intermission.
Would that be a better word? Save your bullshit for someone else.” She snatched
her hand away from his. “Shut up about forever. You’re a man-whore and you
always will be.”