Coming Home (Homeward Bound Series Book 1) (12 page)

Taking a tentative sip of my coffee, I scalded my tongue. It was better than the alternative. I didn’t know what to say. Everything Spencer was saying was true. I knew that, but I couldn’t deny the niggling in the back of my mind that kept doubting it.

We sat in silence and finished our drinks. By the time we were finished I was beyond restless. Sitting there in the quiet with a million and three thoughts bouncing around, I wanted to scream. I understood what Spencer was saying, I really did, but it still didn’t take away what happened. Sliding off my stool, I went to the sink and washed up. Anything to keep my hands busy. Once that was done I was still buzzing, so I wiped the counter tops. Then the inside of the microwave got a thorough clean. Before I knew it I was elbow deep in the oven, scratching at the baked on grease.

I felt him before I heard him, his breath on my neck. His arms wrapped around my waist, his head on my shoulder. “You’re very quiet.”

“Just thinking,” I dodged. I didn’t know how to explain what was buzzing about in my head. I couldn’t make sense of it, so how the hell was I supposed to explain it? Any of it.

“Care to share?”

“Not yet.”

“That’s okay. How can I help?”

“This helps,” I assured him, pulling him closer.

“M’kay,” he murmured.

I don’t know how long we stood there at the kitchen sink. I didn’t care. It felt good. Too good. I dropped my head back and we were left holding each other up. My heart rate slowed, my eyes drooped, and I gave in to the exhaustion. When my knees buckled beneath me, Spencer stepped backwards and swept me up in his arms before carrying me through the house and lying me in the centre of his bed.

I was surrounded by his scent. It was overpowering. And perfect. And comforting. “Thank you, Spence,” I whimpered as I rolled towards him.

Slowly he slumped on the side of the bed and reached for my hand. I watched as my fingers shook as he wrapped them in his own.

“For what, Pippi?” His voice was filled with wonder and bewilderment and I didn’t understand his disbelief.

“Everything, Spencer. I know since I stumbled back into your life I’ve been nothing but a walking, talking disaster. I mean, I’ve pretty much turned your world upside down…”

“Don’t give yourself too much credit, Zoe. I’m pretty damn good of making a mess of things all on my own.” He smiled a crooked smile.

“I know. You’ve taken care of me from the moment…well, you just have.” I tried to say the words but they stuck in my throat and I found myself choking. “And I’ve even kicked you out of your own bed.” An errant tear escaped and raced across my overheated cheek.

Wordlessly, Spencer swiped it away before pulling me into his lap. He wasn’t about to let me go. “Pippi,” his voice was thick with emotion and it cocooned me like a warm blanket. “You can kick me out of my bed anytime.”

“Well, isn’t this just fucking cosy…” a drunk slurred from the doorway.

Chapter 22

SPENCER

I wanted to rip his fucking head off. No, it was more than that. I want to rip his head off then sew it back on with a blunt needle just so I could rip it off all over again. He might have been my twin brother, but it didn’t mean I had to like him. Especially not right now.

“Kane,” I growled, not recognising my own voice.

In my arms, Zoe burrowed against me and tried to make herself as small as possible. My stomach clenched and my jaw locked. I didn’t need to look at her to know what was going on. I could feel it. She was terrified. The shaking that had been barely there moments ago, was undeniable. Her pulse was out of control. Her whole body was covered in tiny goose pimples and her breathing was coming out in forced, shallow gasps. Squeezing her even tighter, I heard the soft whimper that escaped her lips, and I knew I was holding on too tight, but I didn’t loosen my grip. I couldn’t.

“Kane. Get. Out,” I spat forcefully.

I could smell the alcohol rolling off him in waves. He stunk. He was wobbling on his feet, covered in dirt and grass, but it was the stale stench of cigarette smoke and hard liquor that overpowered everything. It made me want to gag.

“I live here too, remember?” Kane flashed a sinister smirk.

Taking another long look at the man hovering in the doorway, I was sad to realise that I didn’t know him. I didn’t recognise the man standing before me. From the sinister snarl on his face to the cocky attitude, right down to the way he’d spoken to Zoe earlier. Kane was my brother. My twin brother. My only brother. My business partner. My house mate. My best mate. Right now, I didn’t see any of those people. Tonight he was unrecognisable.

“Not tonight you don’t,” I countered, leaving no room for argument. Well, at least I thought I had.

“Huh,” he huffed, puffing out his chest. I knew what he was trying to do. He was trying to intimidate me. Trying to make me back down. It wouldn’t happen. Not tonight. Not over this. “Just ’cause you brought home some skank doesn’t mean I can’t sleep in my own bed.”

“Careful, Kane. Be very fucking careful.”

Rage was bubbling just below the surface. Out of the two of us, I’d always been the calm one. Ninety-nine percent of the time Kane would throw the first punch. I wasn’t a saint, I’d always swing back. Very rarely would I be the instigator. Tonight though, if he kept pushing, it wouldn’t take much for me to swing first.

“What? Don’t like the truth?” Kane smirked as he folded his arms across his chest.

I looked down at Zoe. She was trembling in my arms. Her face was an unhealthy shade of grey and I could see her recoiling into her shell. Tucking an errant curl behind her ear, I shifted her off my lap and nestled her amongst the pile of pillows. Turning my back on Kane, I pulled the blanket from the bottom of the bed and covered her up. If I was going to argue with Kane, I wasn’t going to make Zoe sit here and watch. Not with front row seats. Definitely not tonight.

I stepped back and looked down at her. She looked so small. So tired. So afraid. What was worse, was she didn’t look like the Zoe I knew and loved. My Zoe had vanished before my very eyes. Right now, I couldn’t blame her. Bending down, I placed a kiss on her forehead.

“I’ll be right back, Princess. It’ll be okay,” I assured her. I didn’t want to make her promises I couldn’t keep, but coming back to her side wasn’t one I’d break. Not for anyone. Not even my drunken idiot of a brother.

Turning away from her proved to be one of the hardest things I’d ever done. I could hear her soft whimpering, and with each strangled sob it cut a little deeper. Forcing my feet to take one step after the other, I covered the distance to the door in three strides.

“You’d let that piece of trash sleep in your bed?”

Kane’s words burnt through me with a white hot rage I’d never experienced before. Through gritted teeth I managed to spit, “Outside. Now.”

He smirked, then stumbled, but started shuffling towards the back door. I knew that this was going to end up bloody. Kane was itching for a fight. I don’t know who’d pushed his buttons, who’d riled him up like this, or what he was really pissed about, right now I didn’t give a flying fuck. I wanted to smack his head in. He deserved it. He more than deserved it.

Grabbing my phone from my pocket, I shot a quick text to Mum and followed him into the backyard. He was waiting. I’d been caught off in my own little world as I stepped through the door and hadn’t been expecting the left hook to the side of my head. Black spots danced in my vision and everything rocked back and forth, but somehow I kept my feet.

“Fuck, Kane!” I swore, spitting the metallic tasting blood from my mouth. If I wasn’t on the receiving end of that punch I’d have been impressed. “Seriously, what the fuck?” If he wanted to beat the shit out of me, well then, so be it. I’d be damned if I wasn’t going to find out what was stuck up his ass first.

“What? Now you want to talk? Pretend to be brothers? Pretend to give a fuck? You know what? Screw you, Spencer,” Kane exploded as he stormed off the deck and into the centre of the yard before turning back on me. “What the fuck makes you so damn special?”

Now I was lost. “What are you talking about? Seriously, Kane, what the fuck?”

If I thought for a minute that my words would diffuse this situation then I was an even bigger idiot than I thought. It was almost like the sound of my voice triggered him and out of nowhere Kane was charging at me as fast as he could. Bending at the waist, Kane drove his shoulder into my stomach and forced me backwards. He was drunk. Too drunk. Somehow I held my feet. I let him drive me backwards a couple of metres before planting my feet, halting his progress. It seemed to have drained him of most of his fight. Pushing off me, he dropped his grip and stepped away.

Once I was free I took a moment and gulped down a few deep breaths. I knew I was trying to be tough, but Kane had knocked the wind out of me. My head throbbed like a bitch. A couple of metres away, Kane was slumped over, hands on his knees, panting hard. He looked defeated, but I knew he was a stubborn ass. Hell, it was a trait we shared. A trait that served us well in business, but tonight I knew it would be his downfall. He wouldn’t let this go.

“You going to tell me?” I invited, hoping to end this sooner rather than later.

“Fuck you, Spencer,” he snarled, straightening his spine.

I could read the determination in his eyes, the pitfall of being a twin. It was late. I was tired. I had a beautiful girl in my bed I was desperate to check on. I didn’t want to be stuffing about being a dickhead.

“No! Fuck you, Kane. What’d I do to bring this on? Seriously? And don’t fucking blame Zoe. She did nothing and you know it.”

Then I found it. Kane’s trigger. The button to press to send him into a white hot rage. The spark to reignite the inferno that was Kane’s bitter and twisted thoughts. “You’re an even bigger dumb ass than I thought.” He grinned, wiping his mouth on his sleeve.

“How do you figure?”

“Zoe isn’t innocent. Ever since she stepped foot back in this town, you’ve become a pussy whipped asshole. You’ve dropped everything and everyone that’s important to you. Your whole fucking world revolves around that slut…”

I didn’t give him a chance to finish his tirade. I pounced on him, my fury uncontrollable. I swung blows left and right. Some landed. Some didn’t. I felt a knee collide with my ribs and I doubled over, but when Kane lifted his knee again I managed to knock him off balance before he broke my nose. We tumbled to the ground, a mass of limbs and obscenities. I was tiring and I couldn’t help but to hope Kane was too.

“Stop! Please stop,” a soft voice cried.

And as if it was the cure for cancer, world peace, and a ticket to the moon all rolled into one, all the fight left me. I felt Kane’s body slump beneath mine. I didn’t have to look at him to know he’d given up the fight just as quickly as I had.

Rolling off him, I sat on my butt on the wet grass and ran my hands through my hair. What a fucking mess. It took a moment before I found the strength to raise my tired, pounding head and look at Zoe. The truth was I was embarrassed. Sure, Kane had come home itching for a fight and acting like a douche, but I’d sunk to his level pretty quickly. He had an excuse, if there was such a thing. He was completely sloshed.

“Zoe,” I began. Her eyes were filled with unshed tears, her hair in disarray, and her clothes dishevelled. Shaking her head slowly, she wrapped her arms around her chest protectively. Stealing a glance at Kane, he didn’t look much better. He had a split lip, sunken eyes, and was covered in a thin layer of sweat, dirt, and grass. He needed a shower and he needed it now. Hopefully it would wash away the foul stench of whiskey while he was at it.

“Seriously, children!” a screech resounded, followed by a mop of brown hair.

As soon as I saw her I knew we were going to get our asses chewed for being such idiots. Part of me wished I’d never texted her. I just hadn’t been thinking about how I’d look when I’d done it. All I’d been thinking about was Zoe. Right now though, regret was hanging over my head like a fucking noose.

“Mum?” Kane garbled as he spat on the grass beside him.

“Don’t you dare Mum me!”

Glancing at Kane, I saw the same fear reflected in his eyes. Mum might be tiny, but she was still Mum, and she’d just walked in on us acting like idiot children.

“It’s okay…” I started, but when her hand flashed up I quickly shut up. It was safer that way.

“Don’t you dare sit there and tell me it’s okay. You two are grown men, for God’s sake. Why don’t you try acting like it? You’re both filthy, and Kane―you reek. Instead of acting like complete morons, shower up and sleep it off,” she commanded.

Climbing to my feet, I suddenly felt every single one of the blows that Kane had landed. And he’d landed some crackers. “Shit!” I groaned as I pulled myself upright.

“Zoe,” I tried to call out but my voice didn’t seem to be working. My throat was dry and when I saw fear in her eyes I hated myself. She’d already been through hell in the past forty-eight hours and I’d done nothing except make it worse by acting like a Neanderthal. The only thought in my mind was wondering how I could take it back. Undo the last ten minutes. Make it up to her. I had nothing.

“Spencer!” Mum snapped, shocking me from my remorse. “Zoe’s staying with me tonight. Honey, go grab a bag and we’ll get you home. You look like you could use a good night’s sleep,” Mum’s voice softened as she spoke to Zoe and I knew she cared. Not that I’d ever doubted it, but there it was.

“But―”

“No, Spencer! No but Mum. Zoe is coming with me. That way she can get a decent night’s sleep and you two can get your shit together. I don’t want to see either of you until you’re ready to act like adults. Don’t even bother coming near the house. That goes for both of you. So Kane, you can wipe that smirk off your face right now.”

She didn’t wait for protests. Honestly, I wasn’t surprised. Instead, she hitched her bag up higher on her shoulder and stalked back inside. I stood there, rooted to the spot until I heard the car pull away, stewing in my own stupidity.

A deep, dry chuckle broke the eerie silence, “Guess we fucked that up,” Kane offered as he wobbled to his feet.

“We?”

“Yeah, big brother. We. I wasn’t punching myself.”

“You started it,” I reminded him.

“And as usual, you fought back.” Kane shrugged carelessly as he headed towards the house. “I’m going to shower.”

“Fine. Save me some hot water,” I conceded, all the fight gone from me. I’d lost, and lost big. “Kane?”

He spun around as he held open the back screen door. “Yeah?”

“You going to tell me what that was all about?” I asked warily. I wasn’t ready for another round of fisticuffs. I really did want to know what had started that one. I needed to.

“You really want to know?”

Not trusting my voice, I just nodded. Truth be told, I wasn’t one hundred percent sure. I knew myself well enough to know that I wouldn’t get any sleep until I did.

“Zoe has turned you into someone else…”

“No, she hasn’t,” I denied quickly, ignoring the niggling in the back of my brain wondering if maybe Kane had a point.

“Yeah, she has, big brother. Since the moment she set foot in this God forsaken town, you’ve been at her beck and call. You’ve become some pussy whipped wimp. You’re not her boyfriend, Spence. You’re her bitch,” Kane added before ducking inside.

I watched him walk away as his words taunted me. I hadn’t changed. Maybe my priorities had shifted temporarily, but I hadn’t. Not really. Zoe needed my help. She needed me to look after her. To keep her safe. That’s all. When she went home tomorrow, things would go back to normal.