Dare (Finding Love Book 1) (10 page)

BOOK: Dare (Finding Love Book 1)
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~Sixteen~

 

“Dare,” I breath out in shock.

His arms tighten around me, and I lean back into him, my head against the crook of his neck. He doesn’t say anything else, but his head tilts to the side and I feel his warm breath hitting my neck, causing me to shiver in excitement. We dance slowly, our hips twisting together in harmony. The song playing is harsh and fast, but we don’t care. We take it slow, a sensual dance that we can’t break apart from.

“Come with me,” he says a few minutes later.

I nod and grab onto his hand as he pulls me off the dance floor and over to an empty alcove near the back exit. It’s quiet back here, a small light bulb is the only escape from the dark club. I lean against the wall after making sure it’s clean-ish and look up at him with undisguised curiosity.

“What are you doing here?” I finally ask the question that’s been plaguing me since he arrived.

He frowns at me, squinting a little in confusion. “How many drinks did you have?”

I arch a brow at his tone. Or I try to anyway. How many drinks
did
I have? I lost count somewhere after the fourth one. I straighten up but stumble into him, releasing a giggle. “Oops. Guess I had a few,” I shrug unapologetically.

He grabs my arm, his warm fingers causing my skin to heat. “Let’s sit down, Jennifer. I’ll get you some water.” He starts to pull me, concern in his eyes.

But I pull away and fall back against the wall. “No, I’m gonna stay here,” I slur. Everything seems to be moving, and I wish it would stop.

He sighs in resignation, squeezing the bridge of his nose. I want to laugh; he looks funny. “Okay, just stay here? I mean it, Jennifer. Stay,” he growls out before turning around and heading to the bar.

Closing my eyes, I lean against the wall and grab onto my head. It’s pounding so hard, I just want to lie down and sleep forever. Then I find myself crying. I don’t know why it started, but I can’t stop the tears from gliding down my face. Maybe it’s because thoughts of Mo, Steven, and Mom are appearing. I’m not sure why though. Nothing seems to make sense right now.

Feeling my phone buzz in my purse, I dig through to find it. “Ah! Here you are,” I smile in victory. Slowly unlocking my phone, my eyes narrow on the text.

Don’t you look unwell? Too many drinks?

Frowning, I reply:

Stop, Steven.
Leave me alone.

I’ve never answered before, too scared to see his response to me. I start to slide my phone back into my purse when it vibrates again.

This isn’t Steven.

My eyes dart around the room, knowing that I won’t find whoever this is. If it’s not Steven, who is it? Memories of him are blurry, as I’ve tried to block them out. Could it be one of his friends? Possibly someone I met? If not, then why?

Okay, calm down. He - whoever
he
is - can’t hurt me here. This is a public place.
Shivers rack my spine as I shakily put my phone back in my bag. My happiness evaporates, dragging away my drunk high with it. My thoughts clear up, and I know my night is over. I need to get out of here.

“Here. Drink this.” I jump at his voice before turning. Dare’s eyebrows are pulled together in a V, his eyes showing his concern for me. “Are you okay?”

Looking over his shoulder, I nod. “Fine. Hey, can we get out of here? I’m not feeling up to this anymore,” I ask. The urge to bolt is intensifying, the place becoming tight and hot. Sweat drips down my back. I just want to get out of here, the place becoming tight and hot.

He looks as if he wants to ask why, but thankfully he chooses not to. He grabs my hand, and I blindly follow after him. Though odd, I know he’ll take care of me if need be. Right now, I’ll go anywhere and I’ll think about my trust in him later.

He has me drink some water before helping me on the motorcycle, cursing at himself for letting this happen. I want to ask why he’s mad at himself, but I have a hunch that he blames himself for my drinking. I’ll have to change that. It’s nobody’s fault but mine.

 

 

_*_*_*_

 

 

When he pulls up to the familiar gate, I finally relax. Looking up, the hill casts off a peaceful vice. This is my new favorite place, mostly because I’m with Dare. Slowly I get off, my legs still wobbling. Dare grasps my arm, holding onto me. I can’t help but lean into him, his chest both hard and soft, his heart beat fast. I count the beats with closed eyes, falling into a hazy spell. I can’t move; my feet are plastered to the floor. His familiar smell calms me down, putting me into a comfortable spot that I never want to leave.

All too soon, I step away from him. I don’t want to, but I have to. Standing here with him, I lose all sense of time. Anything can happen, and I wouldn’t even realize it. He’s grown special to me, and I’m not sure if I want that or not. I love having this safe feeling when I’m with him, but will that always be there? Seeing Mom fall in love with
nice
or
sweet
guys really makes me cynical since they never worked out. They faked being nice in the beginning, and once they got her, they turned into psychotic bastards. How do I know this isn’t him faking it?

That’s the problem with life. You never know what’s real.

Dare picks the lock, and we climb up the dry grassy hill, thankful that it isn’t muddy. Above us, the starts twinkle bright against the cloudless sky. The gentle wind caresses my heated skin. Slowly, I turn to Dare. silently, he lies on the ground once we reach the top, arms bent under his head. I know he’s waiting for me to say something, to explain what’s happening, but I find it hard to do so. The question is can I tell him? Taking a deep breath, I decide there is no time like the present.

“It started before my dad died. My mom was into drinking, though it didn’t get bad until after I was born. There never seemed to be a time when she
wasn’t
drinking. It seemed like her wine glass was permanently stuck to her hand.” My voice is shaky as I tell him the story. I think about leaving it vague, but really, what do I have to lose? Dare doesn’t interrupt, just keeps his gaze on the stars, but I know he’s listening. “Eventually my dad stopped coming home, and Mom lost it. She got into drugs,” I finally admit. I’ve never said it aloud before. It was always the elephant in the room between Mo and me.

I look over at Dare, who is still and tense. Before I can decide to continue or not, Dare says, “You don’t need to keep going if you don’t want to. I understand.”

And I believe him, but I need to tell him the rest. It feels amazing to get if off my chest, if a bit scary. “No, I need to. Well, Dad stopped giving her money for her drugs so she went out herself. Soon she couldn’t pay her dealer and…” I trail off. My dream flashes before my eyes, and I wince. I feel Dare next to me, a silent supporter. Without much thinking, I seek his hand, grabbing on tight. I
need
his touch.

I hear his jacket rustle, the air shift around us as he scoots closer to me. He wraps arms around me, and I shift so my head lies on his chest. “I’m here for you,” he whispers, his breath warm against my ear.

Rubbing his arm with my thumbs, I continue, thankful for his reassurance. One night, while ironically Dad was home, I knew something was wrong. Mom was more strung out than usual and Dad was angry, throwing things around and cursing - stuff he never did in front of me. Next thing I know, some guy barges into our house and shoots my dad. I was hiding around the corner, and the guy turned to me.” I shake my head. “I thought for sure I was as good as dead, but he walked out with the biggest grin. Like he was smug,” I spit out.

“I’m sorry you had to go through that, Jennifer. If I may ask, why did you freak out tonight? It didn’t have anything to do about what you told me, did it?” he questions as he props himself up on his hand. He looks down at me in concern, as if waiting for me to break into a million pieces. I want to snort. I’ve been through too much to just break from a simple conversation.

If I tell him why I freaked out tonight, that means I have to tell him about Steven and Mo.
That
I’m not ready for. So instead, I ask, “Will you kiss me?”

His eyebrows rise in surprise, and he tilts his head to the side. “I know you asked that so you didn’t have to answer me. A simple maybe later would have sufficed. Don’t ask me to kiss you until you really want it,” he tells me, his voice deeper and smoother than normal. It makes my heart pound in excitement.

Confidently, I turn to him. Like the switch has flipped, I know I want
him.
I want his touch, a gentle caress that heats me up. His words, reassuring and supportive, or his smile, that, embarrassingly, makes me happy. Especially when pointed at me.

Finally, I want his lips. Pressed against mine in every way.

“Don’t think I don’t want it, Dare. I wouldn’t have asked in the first place.” I sit up and grab onto the back of his neck. “Kiss me. I
dare
you.” I grin.

He chuckles with a shake of his head before turning serious. “I thought about this moment for a long time, Jennifer.”

Gently, he leans in and presses his warm lips onto my mine.

Our kiss starts off slow and chaste, our lips barely touching. It’s like a game between us, a battle of dominance. Who will break first and go for the kill? Apparently Dare, because a few seconds later, I feel his hands on me, one around the back of my neck and the other around my waist. I groan as our kiss turns hotter, our lips parting and entering a new and foreign world. The feel of him against me, his hands on my fiery skin, make me nearly combustible.

Shifting onto my knees, he follows, our hands moving, feeling each other’s bodies for familiarity. When I feel like I’m about to run out of air, I pull away. His lips move down to my throat, placing small kisses against my skin. Tilting my head to the side, I smile and grab his hair.

“You’re lovely, Jennifer.” Dare pulls away and looks at me, absently brushing my hair out from my eyes. “Strong, beautiful, smart, and the most caring girl I know. I
really
like you.”

With my heart beating fast, I bite my lip and slowly grin. “I like you too, Dare. A lot.”

His face breaks into a large smile and I lean in and kiss one of his dimples. “Thank God,” he breaths out in relief, and we both laugh.

We spend the rest of the night laughing and talking about anything and everything -except for our pasts. Those secrets are still buried, but as I spend more time with him, they might just slowly reveal themselves.

 

 

_*_*_*_

 

 

The next morning, as I’m getting out of bed, my phone starts to ring. A smile emerges across my face. My heart is beating out of my chest. “Hey,” I greet Dare.

“Hey you. So, since you’re getting off early tonight, how about I take you out?”

Speechless, I tell myself to breathe. “Uh, yeah. Sure. When?”

“How about seven? That sound good to you?”

I nod before remembering that he can’t see me. “Yes, that’s great. I’ll see you then.”

“I will see you then, Jennifer.” We stay on the phone for a few more seconds, words neither of us are ready to say but we feel them there. “Bye,” he finally says and we both hang up at the same time.

Chuckling, I go and get ready for the day. Looks like I have a date tonight!

~Seventeen~

 

Slipping on my green and purple fuzzy socks, I walk into the living room and smile. Jaclyn is eating her ice cream, eyes glued to the TV. “I see you’re just chillin’ today,” I say as I sit down next to her. The Bachelor is on, her binge show for the week.

“Yeah, I finally have a day off. Today has been good, and it’s only ten.”

We sit and watch the show for a while before Hayley comes out. In jeans. “How are you wearing those?” I ask incredulously. It’s nearing 80 out, and it’s only morning.

Jaclyn snorts. “Do you even own a pair shorts? Besides pajamas, which I don’t really count as shorts because they stop at your knees?”

Hayley flushes, and I almost apologize. It’s true though. She doesn’t have shorts - besides a few dresses and her almost-but not nearly there pajamas. “Honestly? I just don’t like my legs,” she says with a shrug.

I almost want to gawk. She thinks her legs are bad? They look better than mine, that’s for sure. Jaclyn speaks before I can. “Hayley, you have perfect legs. Better than Jen’s.”

I hit her arm, and she laughs. “Kidding. But seriously, you look beautiful. You have no need to hide.” That has to be the nicest thing I’ve heard from her. Hayley smiles at Jaclyn, obviously not sure how to take the compliment.

She sits cross legged on the recliner. “So what are you two up to tonight?”

Jaclyn nods to me. “You go.”

“Well,” I slowly smile. “Dare is taking me out tonight.”

Jaclyn giggles around the spoon in her mouth. “Again? So you really like this guy?”

“Yeah, I do. I didn’t think I would, honestly, but he’s just so…” I trail off, at a loss for words. So instead, I fill them in on everything. When I get to the hill part, I hesitate. I can trust these two, I know, but the jitters are still around when I think about telling someone. Thinking how they are going to react makes me nervous. But if I can tell Dare, then I can tell them. So I continue on, slowly telling them about the rest of my night. My words come out haltingly, and I wince.

Finally, I finish and watch them take everything in. Picking at my sleeves, I wait for someone to speak. “I want to paint the walls blue,” Jaclyn’s words break the silence, and I look over at her in surprise. That’s not what I expected. She shrugs. “What? I do.”

Hayley interrupts. “I think what she’s
trying
to convey is that we aren’t judging you or your past.” Shadows appear in her eyes as she slowly continues. “We all have something about our past. It’s just you were brave enough to tell us first.”

“Yeah. She’s right. You got guts, mi amigo.” Jaclyn punches my shoulder.

Relief sweeps through me at their acceptance. Their kind words are reassuring, especially when I need to hear them. These two are the best. “Blue? Really?” I ask.

They laugh, and I smile.
This will be good.
“Okay, wait. Another date? Where is he taking you?” Jaclyn asks curiously.

“Whoa, hold on. Tell us more about this guy. What’s he like? His family, are you going to meet them?” Hayley’s blue eyes hold cold suspicion.

I’m not entirely sure why Hayley is always so tense when I talk about Dare, but I hope it won’t come between us. I really need Hayley and Dare in my lives. As I’m about to tell her about Dare, I remember: I don’t know anything. His past, family and friends are a complete white area to me. I wish he would tell me more, but then I remember that I’ve barely told him everything about myself. Hypocritical of me but I can’t help but wonder.

“Just tell us what you
do
know, Jennifer. You have only had two dates. Meeting the family isn’t important right now.” Jaclyn comes to my rescue.

“Dare is smart. He wants to be an Astronomer,” I smile at their surprised looks. “Yeah, I know. He’s strong and caring, very handsome of course. He’s a complete gentlemen with a sense of humor, but he can also be serious sometimes. It’s those moments that I see he carries the weight of the world on his shoulders, and that like me, he has demons too.” I look at the two sheepishly. “Sorry. I just really like this guy.”

Jaclyn squeals and I wince, rubbing my now ringing ear. “That’s great! I’m glad you found someone you really like. You deserve it, ya know?”

“Thanks. You two are the best!”

Though Hayley is reluctant to approve Dare anyway, she seems to have cooled down with her general dislike of him. She has to know I’m serious about this guy. How that came to be? I’m not entirely sure, but I may as well roll with it.

Just then my phone chimes from my room. Jumping off the couch, I head down the hall and flop down on my bed to answer. “Yes?” I ask breathlessly.

“Really? Jennifer, if you’re busy
don’t
answer the phone.”

I roll my eyes before glaring at my blanket. “Hello to you too, Mom. And I’m not doing anything; I was in the living room.”

She sighs in annoyance. “Anyways, I called for a reason. I can’t recall now,” she mutters absently.

Glancing at my nails, I frown at a chipped on. “You can always call me back when you do remember.”

“No! Hold on a second, it was important. Now let me see.” She hums.

Flipping over, I stare at the off-white, almost ivory ceiling, visualizing it blue.
Maybe a light blue. Like the sky.
Or maybe a darker hue with white stars, just like staring up from the hill.

“Oh, I remember now! Steven is back in jail.”

Bolting upright, my previous thoughts diminish. “What? How can you forget
that
detail?”

“Well, it didn’t seem important.”

Sighing, I close my eyes and stare at the wall, envisioning the scenario.
She’s back on narcotics.
She’s always enjoyed toying with my emotions and laughing at me about it. Mother of the year award goes to: not my mom, that’s for sure. “Why is he back in jail?” I ask bluntly.

“Who knows? I’m just letting you know he’s not out anymore.”

Though I take great relief in knowing that, I have second thoughts about whoever is texting me. It has to be someone he knows. But who?

“Look, I gotta go. I have errands to run today. I’ll talk to you later.” She hiccups before hanging up.

Shaking my head, I think about trying to get her back into rehab. On second thought, I doubt it can help her this time. It’s nearly damaging to see her this way, which breaks my heart.

Sighing, I stand up and get ready for my date.

 

 

_*_*_*_

 

 

 

At seven on the dot, the doorbell rings. With excitement I beat Hayley to the door. Jaclyn is out on a date with some man named Slade. We’re not entirely sure about that, but Jaclyn vouched that he’s perfectly fine. Opening the door, I smile up at Dare. Unlike the other times we’ve seen each other, he isn’t wearing his leather jacket. Instead, he has a dark blue T-shirt with Rolling Stones on it, a light blue jean jacket with the sleeves rolled up his arms and dark distressed jeans. Black converse complete his look, and I almost find myself drooling.

“Hey.” He slowly smiles, the one that’s become my favorite. “Guess we had the same idea,” he says with amusement.

Grinning, I glance down at what I’m wearing. My favorite dark skinny jeans, a simple white top and my red converse. I’m glad it gets cooler in the evening, otherwise I wouldn’t be wearing these jeans. “Guess we did.” I laugh.

He holds out his arm. “You ready to go then?” Looking over my shoulder, he waves at Hayley, who still hasn’t moved. “I’ll bring her back safe and sound, Hayley.”

Waving goodbye, I follow Dare down the stairs and out the entrance doors. Curiously, I look around for the bike, running into his back.
Ouch. That’s hard.
I almost giggle at myself but hold back as Dare sends me a curious look. Shaking my head, I look at the truck in front of me.

“Why aren’t we taking the motorcycle? Wait, I thought you didn’t have a truck?” I ask suspiciously. A pang of disappointment settles in as I stare at the rusty black Ford pickup. I’ve grown to love riding the motorcycle.

He walks around the side and opens the door for me. I hop in and buckle up. “I never said I
didn’t
have something other than my motorcycle. To be honest,” he leans in, and I look at him, my heart sputtering at how close he is, “I just wanted you on the back of my bike.”

Smirking, he leans back and closes the door. I release a gust of air, my body going lax as I watch him round the truck. It’s like he’s a magnet and the more I resist, the bigger the pull I feel toward him.

I watch as he sits down, his long fingers curling around the steering wheel. His essence grabs my full attention. I’m a puddle of melted ice cream, and he’s the hot sun.
I sound like a swooning girl.

“So where are we going?” I break the tense silence between us. The intense heat between us is electrifying and I consider rolling down the window.

His brows furrow as he reads his phone. He quickly types something back and glances over at me. Huh. “That’s a surprise, Jennifer. My lips are sealed.” Like magic, my gaze zeroes in on his lips. A slightly fuller bottom lip that’s perfect to bite. “So you feeling better after last night?” He starts up the truck and pulls out of the parking spot.

I force myself to face the window, looking out as the world passes by. “Much better. Sorry about all of that. I didn’t intend to dump that on you.”

He’s already shaking his head. “No, don’t be sorry. I’m glad you told me.” He looks over at me. “I get to really know you that way.” At a stop-light, his phone vibrates. Another glance at it has him angry now.
Who is that?
My first reaction is jealousy. Then again, it could be anyone, I rationalize.

“I’ve kept that close to me for a long time. It felt good to talk about it but also frightening. Don’t know why but it did.”

I hear rustling before I feel his hand on mine. “Come over here. You’re too far away,” he gruffly demands.

I refuse to think about what his gruff voice does to me. Scooting over, I sit as close to him as I can, his arm laying over my shoulder. “It scared you because letting something like that go changes you. You become freer, almost weightless as the wrongs leave you.”

Peeking up at him, I see his jaw is clenched tight, and his eyes are narrow slits. I rub my thumb over the top of his hand, hoping to calm him somehow. “Sounds like you have experience.”

He nods once and for the rest of the ride, we sit in silence. Not as tense as before, this time it’s comfortable. Real. And for the time being, I push the mysterious texts away.

A few minutes later, he pulls up to a large dull brown building. In the middle is a dome shape with colorful glass shapes interwoven into it. “Where are we?”

Dare chuckles and gets out, holding his hand out for me to grab as I scoot along the seat. Hopping out, I wipe my hands on my jeans and walk to the entrance. “Nope, this way.”

I turn around to see Dare heading around the building. I catch up with him as he waits for me near a locked gate. Arching a brow, I purse my lips to stop myself from laughing. “Do you pick this lock too?”

He shakes his head at me. “Be quiet, you.” His mock glare makes me lose it, and I start laughing - noiselessly though. I don’t want to get caught. He pushes the gate open, and we make our way through. Behind the building is a large, green field, a few picnic tables in random spots. Some trees are in the distance, no doubt offering a cool sanctuary in the summer.

Another building is farther away from the main one. It’s smaller but also has a dome shape. “That is where we are going.” He smiles down at me, barely containing his excitement. Now I’m even more curious.

We trek through the field, taking in the orange hue from the sky as the sun starts to descend, a beautiful backdrop to the green field. When we reach the building, I read the plaque.
Planetarium.
Dare opens the door, and I’m surprised to see it unlocked. It’s completely dark inside, and I huddle close to Dare as he walks around, intent on finding a light switch. He must come here a lot though, because he finds it fairly fast.

He flips it on and I look around in amazement. The dome part of the building
is
space. Planets hang down from the ceiling, the Milky Way and constellations making up most of the ceiling. As he turns on another switch, the stars light up and I look on in awe.

“This is incredible!”

Behind me, I flush as I feel his arms wrap around my middle, tugging me back against his chest. “Yeah, it is. I come here all the time. It’s another spot of mine where I can de-stress. Here.” He brings me over to a stage I hadn’t seen, a large backdrop behind it. “This is where they do showings. Lie down and look up.”

I do as he says, and it’s like the view from the top of our hill. Yes,
our
hill as I’ve started calling it. Seems fitting now.

“Secrets have a way of festering deep down inside of us. The darkness clings to your heart, creating nothing but a space of emptiness where only goodness should be,” he says, startling me out of my reverence. I look over at him, seeing him frowning down at his phone again. I want to demand he tell me who he’s talking to, but I don’t.

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