Doira'Liim (The Beautiful Whisper of the Goddess Saga) (27 page)

     "I have to go...things to do...matters to attend. There is much to do...yes, much to do and not nearly enough time."

     Talyn raised an eyebrow at Cynra's odd words and looked around the room she stood in. Animal hides and teeth and bones were set around the circular space, while rocks and gems and animal feathers, which normally would have been in the pouches Cynra had dumped in the floor, lay huddled in a heap in complete disarray. Sticks of sage laid on a table with bowls and writing implements, and tattered and worn pages of parchment were strewn about the leaves of the older woman's bed.

     Cynra appeared agitated and preoccupied with whatever issue was causing her to act so. "Age is such a fickle foe, is it not? I have been granted more years than could be counted and now, when I have need of time and haste, I find that the very years that were once a gift to me are now a slow moving poison."

     Talyn had no idea what Cynra was rambling on about. Nothing the Dream Speaker was saying made any amount of sense to her. Stepping in front of the shorter woman, she placed a hand on her frail looking shoulder and stilled her movements. "Stop, Honored One," she said in a strong and deliberate voice. "What has you so beside yourself and why were you not at
Raekir
?"

     Cynra blinked and the hazy look in her eyes seemed to fade away. She looked around her home and sighed. "Oh, pity. What a mess! It will take a great many nights to organize all of this again." Stepping back once more, Talyn refused to point out that the mess in question had been Cynra's own doing. "Cynra, what is the matter?"

     Cynra looked up at her and for the first time, Talyn noticed a small traveling pack strapped over her shoulder. Sparing a quick glance behind her, she took in the walking stick Cynra used when she meant to set out on some trek resting against the wall.

     "You mean to leave as well?" she asked. Arizira had departed nearly two weeks ago and her absence was still greatly felt. If Cynra also meant to leave, then Talyn feared that an even greater sense of loss would overtake the tribe.

     "Yes. I have so much to do. One would think all these years enough time to put my affairs in order, but alas, here I am and the task my life has awaited is here." Cynra moved around Talyn and grabbed her walking stick. Bending down, she went about placing various items into her pack and paid no more attention to her guest.

     "What are you on about? What task? You cannot leave! Not now and not with the winter keeping the land in place!"

     "The matter at hand can not be discussed openly with present company. You would not understand. Questions...questions -- you have always asked so many of them, Talyn."

     Starting at the brusque tone, Talyn squared her shoulders and took a strong stance. "You forget to whom you speak. Despite my respect for you and our friendship, I am still your Elder, your leader." Chuckling, Cynra stood and turned to face Talyn. "Elder. You are young, Talyn. By my reckoning, the whole of the tribe is naught by children. I have seen ages pass and fade away while loved ones have both come and parted this world. My own child I see no more..."

     Talyn took notice -- extreme notice -- of Cynra's last words. Her eyes narrowed and she took a cautious step forward. "What child, Cynra? There are none here who recall you being blessed by Aitla."

     Purple eyes flared brightly before Cynra shuffled around Talyn once again and lowered herself slowly to her bed. She did not have time for such frivolous questions, but she knew she had to at least impart some of her history to the
Nai'iris
if she hoped to leave at once without any chance of pursuit.

     "What I am about to tell you, Talyn, you must swear before Aitla not to repeat. There are events being set into motion that are, even now, guiding the fates of all here. Whispers of ages long ago now echo in this time and set the melody for the music to be sung in the future. You must understand that you can not interfere once I tell you these matters. Aitla has long spoken to me and it is She alone who guides these old legs."

     Talyn took in a deep breath and looked on Cynra with new eyes. A gravity she could not place seemed to settle around her and she knew Cynra was not about to speak lightly or in rhymes or riddles.

     "Do you promise before the Moon Mother?" Talyn nodded silently. To make a promise before Aitla was not something any Arniran would take in jest or without understanding.

     "There is much the tribe does not recall about me, just as there is much the tribe does not know of me. I have been here for as long as any of you can remember and yet, none of you ever thought to question matters. I knew your mothers and your grandmothers, Talyn. My own daughter was a friend to your nurture mother. By the time you became
Nai'iris
, my daughter had left to follow her heart. Many, as the years continued to grow, forgot her existence as she was not around to remind them of it. But, she returned twenty-seven years ago and had need of my aid."

     Talyn tried to make sense of what was being told to her. She could not recall a child belonging to Cynra, nor could she recall that child ever returning to the tribe and requesting aid from anyone. "I met with her in secret," Cynra said, noticing the confusion etched across Talyn's flawless features. "When I returned to the tribe, I was not alone. A newborn child of Aitla I carried with me."

     Realization washed over Talyn immediately and she felt her mouth hang open while her eyes widened. "Arizira," she whispered. Nodding, Cynra leaned forward and rested her hands on her staff. "Yes, the Child of Whispers is my grand-daughter. Her nurture mother was my daughter."

     Talyn stood up and rubbed her fingers across her temples as she began to pace. She remembered the night Cynra spoke of. The older woman had said Aitla had spoken to her about a child soon to be born. The mother of the child, according to Cynra, was a member of the tribe who had left long ago. The other women had not questioned Cynra, taking her words as absolute truth, and later raised Arizira in their community.

     "Does she know?" Cynra shook her head sadly, "No," she replied.

     "How...how does Ma'nolira not recall your daughter? How do any of us not remember? Young by our count I was, but still the years should be remembered by me," Talyn asked, still pacing.

     Cynra watched the woman pace and smiled to herself. "Because Aitla required such secrecy. Only I was to remember the truth. I and one other, but we will not speak of her."

     "Why?"

     "Because Arizira is more than the Child of Whispers, young one. She is the key to everything. Her nurture mother, Iolirthas, was my daughter. What none of you know is who her other mother is. That is the important issue and for that, Aitla needed time for matters to ripen."

     Stopping her pacing and turning to look Cynra directly in the eyes, Talyn exhaled sharply before, "You are telling me that Arizira's fate, her purpose in life, has finally come before her?"

     "Yes."

     "And what does that purpose include, Cynra?"

     Cynra stood up and took a moment for her bones to stop protesting. Rolling her shoulders, she took a slow step forward. "Love, Talyn. Arizira's purpose in life, the great plan Aitla ensured she would be a part of, is love."

     Scoffing and looking rather annoyed, Talyn retorted, "Love? What love? How could something so personal touch so many? What plan is there in allowing Arizira to find love? We all have done so."

     Cynra walked over to the ladder that would lead her down to the forest floor below. Securing her pack and staff over her back, she rested a hand on the wooden ladder before answering. "Arizira's love is not some trifle. The kind of love she will experience will be unlike anything any one of us has ever felt. She will find the mate her spirit has searched for. This love will unlock the past and secure our future!"

     Talyn stopped Cynra from descending the ladder with a quick hand to her shoulder again. "You told us Arizira's nurture mother passed to Aitla and that her other mother had returned to her own tribe. Was any of that true?"

     Cynra looked up at her and Talyn saw, for the first time, her great age reflected in her eyes. "Perhaps. Perhaps not. There is no time for your questions, Talyn. I am leaving and I do not expect you to try to follow me. Keep a close eye on your hunters, child. Anger always lets loose the first volley."

     Swallowing nervously at Cynra's tone, Talyn asked, "Who is this woman that Arizira will love so? Who will be a part of her destiny and shape the lives of so many?" Cynra lowered herself halfway down the ladder. Looking back up, she smirked in amusement and replied, "An Esu woman. Arizira's
Doira'Liim
is a follower of Esuval and a day walker."

     As her feet connected with the earth below, the only sound from high above was that of Talyn's heavy and sharp gasp.

                                                        Chapter 19: The Test

     Talliea sighed in frustration as she bent down to inspect a slight depression in the dirt before her. "This is absurd!" she said to herself.

     A cold and stiff wind kept her back company and it only proved to increase her frustration. Arizira had left earlier in the morning, stating that she planned to head deeper into the forest and wished for Talliea to use the skills she'd been taught to find her. Talliea, naturally, had protested, saying that two weeks of being shown how to track and navigate the landscape was not nearly enough time to use those skills in a search for an Arniran under a roof of trees.

     Arizira had only smiled, placing her bow across her back and her sabres at her hips, before leaving a stunned and rather put out Talliea.

     Now, an hour and a half later, with the sun having reached its highest point in the sky, Talliea felt again the futility of her current endeavor. How did Arizira honestly expect her to find her? The Arniran woman barely made a sound when she walked and never had Talliea noticed even a leaf broken in the wake of her steps! The forest around them, despite their distant location, was still Arizira's home.

     Talliea studied the slight disturbance in the earth and was surprised to notice that, though it had not been made by her companion, it was a print and she had been aware of it! Placing her hand in the dirt, she felt around the edges and counted the width with her fingers like Arizira had taught her. Possibly a deer? she guessed.

     Standing up, she looked around again and hoped for another sign of Arizira's whereabouts. She started off again and easily walked through fallen leaves and pine needles, thick also with pine cones, and around low hanging branches. As she walked, she tried to take in every leaf, every dip in the ground, and every sound that came to her ears. For several minutes, she continued without any true direction. Her mind wandered inside itself and she found herself thinking of Arizira.

     She thought over the past several weeks and then even further back to when she'd first encountered the enchanting woman. She remembered leaving her camp after having another argument with her mother and making her way into the forest. She'd been so angry at her mother that night. Long her people had been on the open plains and no sooner did they make camp, then her mother was on her again about joining with Markahn.

     It had upset her and before she'd been aware she'd found herself in a glade, the likes of which she'd never seen. The setting had calmed her immediately but that feeling had not lasted long. Arizira had come upon her soon after and with her chance appearance, Talliea's life had been changed forever.

     She recalled the way Arizira had looked at her, the way she'd knelt before her and gestured her intent as best as she could. Talliea remembered thinking that beauty would have been envious to have looked upon one as remarkable as Arizira.

     Walking down a small slope, she noticed the leaves on a branch next to her were tattered, as if they had been rushed through or pushed aside in haste. Her heart jumped and she took a moment to study her next clue. Before long, she was back on the trail, though she knew not whether she was truly following Arizira or if she was only succeeding in getting herself lost.

     Her mind once again returned to Arizira and she let herself remember the first time she'd heard the woman speak Esulan. The words had been broken and hard to understand, but despite that she had thought Arizira's voice both soothing and beautiful. The way her eyes had brightly glowed under the obscured moon had been the most magical and awe-inducing sight she had ever witnessed. To this day, she still found herself looking forward to the night. With its return came also one of her most beloved sights.

     What was it that caused her mind to continuously think upon Arizira? What was it about the other woman that caused her body to yearn for her touch and her heart to seek the sound of her voice? Everything about Arizira held her enchanted and she could no longer call the fascination just a curiosity.

     She knew it was more than that. She had feelings for Arizira and that frightened her. Never in her life had she felt for someone what she felt for Arizira. Even being unable to put a name on her feelings did not diminish the knowledge that they were unique.

     The wind at her back ceased to blow after a time and she found another branch with the same ruffling of leaves. Elated at the possibility that she, in fact, was on Arizira's trail, Talliea continued through the woods as quickly and quietly as she could. Though she was not nearly as agile or stealthy as her Arniran companion, she had developed a more silent approach when it came to moving through the forest.

     Secure in the knowledge that Arizira had made matters far too easy, Talliea walked without a care or worry. She leaped easily over a small creek and even stopped to marvel at the color of the rocks under the shallow water's surface. Birds and squirrels moved far above her and the sounds of peace, if peace could produce a note of music, were melodic to her ears.

     Again, her thoughts came to settle on Arizira. Her mind moved from one memory to the next as she experienced again every moment the two of them had shared. She recalled the way Arizira had felt pressed so tightly against her body when they had been in the cave hiding from Markahn. She remembered the way Arizira's hands had felt when they had applied the
dohethra
and she felt her body tense at the memory of the dreams she'd been having recently.

     A smile formed on her lips while her mind replayed all her time with Arizira. From laughter and games, to storytelling and the confiding of secrets, to myths and beliefs, everything about Arizira seemed to take her over as she walked through the trees.

    
I love your smile and the way you laugh
, she thought to herself in regard to her friend.
I love how gentle you are with me, but I also admire your strength. I adore your curiosity and your ideals. I appreciate your beliefs and look forward to your humor and mischief. I love the way you look at me and my body comes alive under your touch. I love everything about yo--

     Her internal thoughts and declarations were cut short when an arrow flew within an inch of her face and landed in a tree to her left. Instinctively, she dived to the ground and rolled over until her back was behind a tree and facing away from the location of the shooter. The sound of her heart beating sounded loudly inside her head and she felt a nervous sensation in the pit of her stomach. Her hand reached for the jeweled dagger Arizira had given her, but she sighed when she realized how useless the weapon was.

     Who was shooting at her and why? Had Lao'dahn come looking for her? Had he come upon Arizira? Was the other woman safe? Please...please let her be safe, she pleaded to herself.

     The sudden thought that some harm could have befallen Arizira panicked her beyond reason. She tried to imagine never talking to the other woman again or never getting to look into her eyes at night, but the ideas were too unfathomable for her and she shook her head in an attempt to clear it.
No...you are safe from harm, Ahmanae. You have to be
.

     Keeping her back against the base of the tree, Talliea took a deep breath before angling her body so that she could peer around the corner. No arrows flew and all remained silent. She turned away again and settled her back to the tree once more. Swallowing her anxiety, she squeezed her eyes shut and tried to calm herself. Her mind was a chaotic jumble as she tried to focus her thoughts and decide on what to do next.

     She stood up, all the while keeping her back to the tree and took a deep breath. Looking to her right, she saw another tall tree with several low branches still heavy with leaves. The tree looked more defensible than her current one. Peering around the opposite side of the tree, she was relieved when it rendered the same results as the other side.

     No more arrows flew her way. Once back against the tree, she tried to judge how far the distance was between it and the tree she was currently using as protection. Ten, perhaps fifteen feet.

     With the blanket of pine needles between the two trees, Talliea knew she would have to move with all the skill she possessed. One misstep and she could fall and the shooter would have her out in the open. She tried again to calm the uneasy feeling in the pit of her stomach. Despite her own danger, her thoughts were not on herself or her safety.

     They were focused on Arizira and the fervent hope that she was safe and without any injury. Taking one last breath, she turned quickly to her right and made for the cover of the next tree. Her feet, surprisingly to her, moved swiftly and without fail. Before she was aware, she was safely squatting near a low hanging branch. Sighing, she felt some of the tension leave her body and was about to laugh to herself at her own fortune when she realized something was amiss.

     The shadows on the ground were not how they were supposed to be. Looking up quickly, she came face to face with the very sharp point of an arrowhead. The sun shined down brightly behind the person wielding the bow and she squinted as she tried to make out who the marksman was.

     "I win," the person said and Talliea gasped loudly before quickly pushing the arrowhead aside. The arrow itself fell to the ground and the person in question turned so that the sun no longer hindered them from view. Arizira's amused and smirking face came into Talliea's sight and she found herself confused as to whether she should be happy or angry. The bow in Arizira's hand and the arrow on the ground told Talliea that she had been the one who shot at her.

     "You almost killed me!" she yelled, her tumultuous emotions finding an outlet, before snatching Arizira's bow from her hand. Arizira appeared unperturbed by her display and only smiled again. "I did no such thing, Tah-li. I tested you."

     Fuming now and feeling the day's events finally catch up to her, Talliea ran her hand through her hair and opened her mouth several times before finally saying, "Test? That was no test! That arrow nearly took off my nose!"

     Arizira reached up and patted Talliea's nose playfully with two of her fingers. "Your nose is safe. I am a remarkable shot, Tah-li. Your life was never in any danger."

     Slapping away her friend's fingers, Talliea shook her head and started to pace. She had thought Arizira lost to some evil deed! She had been under the fear that Lao'dahn had found her, or worse, brought harm to Arizira! Her entire world -- her hopes, her dreams, her unresolved feelings for Arizira, had all weighed heavily on her and the whole thing had been...a...test?

     "I thought you were in danger! I thought...I thought I would never see you again! You could have been in pain, injured by some malice, and I feared you were lost to me!"

     Arizira's easy smile faltered and she took a step forward in an effort to comfort Talliea. "I-I did not wish for any such thoughts for you, Tah-li. Arnira training includes something close to this and..I-I would never hurt you. I wished for you to use your skills in a real setting."

     Talliea took a shaky breath and sighed. Looking into Arizira's bluish eyes, she felt all of her unnamed feelings rush to the surface. "I thought Lao'dahn had found me. I feared he had..." Brown eyes closed as the fear she had experienced overcame her. Arizira closed the distance between them and took her bow from her hand. Tossing it to the ground, she placed her hands on either side of Talliea's face until her eyes opened again.

     Despite her resolve to keep her physical desires repressed, Arizira knew that Talliea needed to be comforted in this moment. The two of them looked into each other's eyes and Arizira smoothed her thumbs over Talliea's cheeks. "I am sorry. This was only a test. Never would I have done so if I thought the act would bring you pain."

     Talliea released another breath and let herself get lost in the feeling of Arizira's touch. The other woman did not touch her as frequently as she once had and Talliea missed that. Often, she had desired to ask why the change had taken place, but the thought of what the answer could be seemed always to keep her from doing so. She could nor recall Arizira ever speaking of a mate, but then she also could not recall her ever
not
speaking of a mate.

     The idea that Arizira had someone, someone who was not her, upset Talliea and so she never expressed the loss she felt with the absence of their physicality. Now, however, that loss was a distant memory and she could do nothing more but stare into the eyes of the person she...

     What are these feelings I have for you? she questioned inside the confines of her own thoughts. What are these feelings that leave me breathless?

     "...be happy. The experience may have been frightening, but you passed," Arizira was saying.  Blinking, and attempting to shake her own thoughts and focus on Arizira's words, Talliea blurted out, "What?"