Don’t Ever Wonder (14 page)

“What’s up? You got only five minutes in there with him so get a move on.” I noticed a stupid look on his face. “What?” I asked as he stood to head back.

“You know Renée is getting married?” he asked.

“Yeah, I know.”

“Well, I didn’t want to break it to her…”

“What?” I asked.

Shue twisted his lips, “While you were in there she told me all about her life in Houston…she’s doing all right for herself…”

“Yeah, yeah, get to the point.”

“Well, she showed me a couple pictures of her fiancé and her and I had the strangest feeling.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, I think I know the guy she is marrying.”

“From where?” I asked.

Shue twisted his lips and tilted his head, setting up the delivery for his own drama. “From the back.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“You sure?”

“If I’m lying I’m flying.”

I couldn’t and wouldn’t believe that Shue would make a joke out of something so serious. “Please tell me you’re playing. From what Renée tells me, he is such a great guy and really into her. On top of that, why would he want to marry her? Maybe you have him mixed up.”

“If that nigga ain’t on the down low, then Oprah’s ass is broke and you know that ain’t possible. I even remembered the Negro’s name. You tend to remember a black man named Tamarick. I met him at the Bayou Classic one year. He was bragging about how much he had going on. He had it going on all right. All night.”

“Damn,” I yelled. “This is all I need. She has to know.” I shook my head. “So, you’re positive.”

“A hundred and fifty percent.”

“Just when I thought I’d seen and heard it all.” I shook my head in both anger and disgust.

“When it rains…” Shue said.

“It pours.” I finished.

“No offense, Shue, but why can’t these switch-hitters pick a team. I mean I know that you went through a state where you were a little confused, but all the confusion in the world doesn’t make it right. They’re killing our sistahs with that sick, selfish behavior.”

“I agree one hundred percent.”

“Do me a favor.”

“What’s that?” Shue asked.

“Pass the word on to the gay community to out these down-low brothers at every opportunity.”

He burst into laughter. “Yeah, that’s a good idea.”

“I’m serious.”

“I didn’t think you weren’t serious, not for a second.” He paused. “So are you going to tell Renée?”

I stood silent playing the scenario out in my mind. “I don’t really see where I have a choice.”

“No, you don’t.”

I had a sick feeling in my stomach as I prepared to leave. Not much was going right and I had a sense that some of it was actually the calm before the storm. I extended my hand to Shue and said, “Peace.”

He returned, “If we’re lucky my man. If we’re lucky.”

Anita and Nate
sat on the floor drinking iced tea and vanilla crèmes that he had gotten from a rest stop on the drive north. He’d been trying to keep her mind off of what was bothering her and to cheer her up. He didn’t so much as utter a word about what was going on between Anita and her husband. She had turned her cell phone off because she didn’t want to be bugged. It was obvious that she was in shut-down mode.

At the door Nate only noticed her face but once inside there was no way to ignore how sexy she looked. She was braless under a faded Arden B tank top and her cheeks jiggled as she moved about in a pair of women’s boxers from Vickie’s.

“So, honestly, Nate, why would you drive all the way up here? And please don’t tell me you were worried about me.”

“It’s funny because that’s exactly what I was about to say.” He stared into her eyes. “I don’t know, Nita, there’s something about you. Getting to know you the past few weeks has made me feel something. I’m coming to know God and trying to learn how to rely on him. Even still, there’s nothing that can compare to the feeling that I have when I’m around you.”

She was still and leaned her head back. “What kind of feelings?” she said almost in a whisper, feeling afraid of what would come next.

Nate leaned into her and placed his hands on her cheeks. “It’s like I want to see you happier than you already are. Every time I think of you I can’t bear the thought of you not being appreciated to the utmost. From the moment I saw you in the kitchen I felt a connection to you. I felt like you were put on this earth to be with me.”

Anita softly said, “Noooo,” while shaking her head. Her hands were trembling.

Nate moved closer toward her and kissed her gently on the lips. She only imagined resisting as his tongue parted her lips. While kissing her, he eased toward her until his weight caused her to lean back onto the floor. All Nate’s instincts began to surface as he prepared to put down the loving of a lifetime. He was on top of her. Anita’s hands were wrapped around his neck and she was beginning to breathe heavily as his hands began to explore her body.

She felt Nate lift her from the floor and place her on the bed. Her mind began to race with thoughts of what he would do to her. “Take them off,” Nate commanded as he pointed to her clothes.

As if she were in a trance she grabbed the bottom of her shirt and lifted it off over her head. Nate hadn’t had sex in over two months. It was the longest stretch he had ever gone with no pussy, and his dick was harder than a lead pipe. He had beaten her to taking off his shirt but when he dropped his underwear, Anita let out a sigh. She figured that there were at least nine or ten inches staring at her. But after dealing with the four and a half her husband had, almost anything would have looked humongous.

“Do you have protection?” she asked as Nate joined her on the bed. Then she said, “I can’t believe I asked you that. We can’t do this, Nate. Please don’t—” Just then she felt his tongue press against her rock-hard nipples. “Ohhhhh,” she cried out.

Nate danced his tongue all over her chest, taking time to squeeze and caress each breast. She’d forgotten what it was like to have her body freaked before making love. “Turn over,” he commanded.

The way he spoke to her made her weak and inflamed her with passion. She did as told and in seconds she found herself being bathed in kisses from Nate. Anita shivered when he swirled his tongue into the small of her back. He could smell the scent of her perfume filling his head even on her lower back. With a cheek in each hand he spread her bottom and continued to kiss and lick. It was perfect and he tried unsuccessfully to calm himself down and hold back but he was too swept away. Seconds later, Anita jumped as his tongue brushed her hole on the way to her pussy. He gave her more of his sweet torture until he finally pulled away. He flipped her over and dived into her center, face first.

Smooth like a Maxwell cut, he licked her out. All of her passion raced to her middle and exploded as Nate used his tongue to take her mind and body to another place. Anita sang like a bird through her first orgasm. “Sssssooooooo goooooood, yes, Nate. It’s beeen sssssoooo lllllooong since…since…oh damn…I’m about ta’…’bout ta’…” Her body shook, shoulders lifted off the bed, she grabbed her own breasts and rode the wave down to her toes.

Nate moved up and with his face glistening from her juices, he kissed her full on the mouth.

Her head was in the clouds. It was like an out-of-body experience for Anita as she’d just realized that she had never had an orgasm before that moment. She wanted another. “Do it again. Please do it again,” she mumbled as she stretched and cracked the bones in her feet and toes.

“We’ve got all night,” Nate answered. Anita’s eyes were closed and when she opened them slightly she noticed Nate’s dick on her lips. She may not have been getting the best sex from her husband but she had become very adept at giving head. Some nights it saved her from being bothered with Lloyd trying to climb on top of her.

Anita caught Nate by surprise when she gripped him and took the head into her mouth. She teased him unmercifully and Nate was totally shocked when he felt his orgasm coming so quickly. Her hands were coated with saliva as she jacked him up and down while teasing the head. “You like that?” she asked.

Nate didn’t answer; instead his face tightened and he locked into a grimace as he began shooting all over her. That part she normally hated but for Nate she allowed him to have his way. She continued sucking until he was spent only to notice that he was still hard.

Nate crisscrossed between the motions of making love to Anita and flat out banging her. It had been a while, and even though he was enamored with her, there was a lot pent up inside of him. He never realized how much of a release sex had been for him. Anita didn’t know or care what was running through his mind. What he was doing to her was a dream come true. One minute she felt as if her body was being caressed and cared for as if she was a queen and a few minutes later her hair was being pulled as he slammed into her from the back.

Feeling sticky from the sex, she attempted to shower, only to be taken again by Nate on the bathroom countertop. When Anita finally finished in the shower and made it to the bed, she nearly collapsed. Her body felt as if she had been electrocuted, but in a good way. She barely had enough time to notice that Nate was already sleeping soundly before she curled up behind him and drifted off to sleep.

Trying to do
something a little different, I took Nina to the Bar Nun. On Monday nights there was open-mike poetry. We arrived early and took a seat on the couches on the side of the stage. The decor in the basement where the performances took place reminded me of the spot in
love jones
where Darius Lovehall and company spit their prose in the movie. I loved poetry and had made attempts to get Nina involved before we broke up.

The atmosphere was relaxing and just what I needed. My mind was still heavy with all that was going on. I’d tried to check on Shelly, but my calls went unanswered. I assumed that she was still too angry with my leaving to deal with me and I had to respect her feelings. I was worn out from working all night and spending nearly every free moment at the hospital with Brendan. I hadn’t confided in anyone but I honestly was beginning to fear the worst. He’d been unconscious for ten days and his condition was stabilizing but not improving. Though I tried not to think about it, I was trying to brace myself for life without Brendan.

The first few acts were okay but when the fourth went up to perform I was blown away. The sistah looked too young to be so damned deep. She went by the name Shaketa, and she performed her poetry over the soft rhythms of congas and a keyboard. I couldn’t say if it was her words or the way that she delivered them with such obvious passion. It was obvious that her verse spoke of her own life and she seemed almost drained by the time she concluded.

When she finished she placed the microphone back on the stand and wiped tears from her cheeks. I looked over at Nina and saw that her eyes were watering. “You all right, baby?” I asked.

She nodded. We sat there and sipped our wine while the next poets went up. At the intermission Nina asked if we could leave, said she was feeling drained. As we made our way back to the car, a Hispanic man selling roses walked up on me. “Flowers for the lady, señor?”

Nina wave her hand to the man. “I’ll take one.” She handed him a five, took a rose, and handed it to me.

“Gracias, senorita,”
he said.

“De nada,”
she replied.

I smiled at her. “Thank you.”

“You’re very welcome.”

We were in
the car listening to Justine Love’s
Love Talk and Slow Jams
on WPGC as we cruised toward Nina’s house. She had recently purchased a town house in Wheaton. “So are you definitely getting a divorce?” she asked.

“Yes.”

“When are you filing?” she asked as we exited the car and headed toward the house.

“Well, we have to be separated for a year before we can file, then it will take six months at the most after that.”

She was quiet for a few seconds. “So what am I supposed to do until then, run around with my sister’s husband?”

“I don’t really know, Nina. I can’t make that choice for you. All I can say is that I love you and I know that I made a terrible mistake. I’m trying to straighten it all out now.”

“You know, I need to be honest with you. It bothers me. I mean…you really messed things up. You come across as this together brother, and don’t get me wrong, you do have it going on, but this is some crazy shit. You married my sister and now here you are, literally back at my doorstep,” she said, turning the key and entering. She shut door and turned off the alarm. “Are you planning on spending the night?”

“If it’s okay with you,” I replied.

“Oh it’s fine, but just know that you won’t be getting any of
this
until you’re divorced.” She looked at the expression on my face. I really wanted to make love to her. Having sex with Terri a few days back had only made me hornier. If Nina wanted to play games, it wouldn’t be anything for me to make a quick trip back up to Harlem.

True to her word we climbed into her bed and went to sleep without so much as a kiss good night.

At two o’clock
in the morning we were both stirred awake by a banging at Nina’s door. “What the fuck?” I said, being jarred from my sleep.

She jumped out of the bed and went to the window. Another series of bangs came at the door. “Oh no, this fool didn’t,” she grumbled. Instead of putting on a robe she slipped on a pair of jeans. “Be right back,” she said.

I wandered to the window and looked out to see a police car double-parked in front of her home blocking her car in. I walked over to her door and went to the top of the steps. I heard her at the front door. “What the hell are you doing here? I’m sleeping.”

Then I heard a male voice. “You’ve got company, don’t you?”

“Listen, Felton. I don’t have time for this. You ain’t no jack-in-the-box so you shouldn’t be popping up like you are one. Please don’t make me call your superiors.”

“What?”

“You heard me. I don’t play this bullshit, comin’ over here in the middle of the night harassing me, on duty at that. I’ll call you tomorrow.”

“Just tell me. Do you have company?”

“Leave now. I really don’t appreciate you questioning me like this. Excuse me.”

Then in a voice loud enough for me, or anyone who might be in the house to hear, he yelled out, “I better not catch anyone coming out of here.” When he said that I walked down the steps in my underwear and without a shirt on.

When he saw me his eyes bugged out of his head. “Aha, I knew it.”

“Aha, my ass. Felton, you are not my man.” Then the Spanish kicked in and she began to curse him out.

“Not your man? Not your man?” He looked like he was about to throw a temper tantrum. “You didn’t say that when I was buying all the furniture for this place.”

“Go home, go tell it to your wife,” Nina said.

I was shocked when she said that. I couldn’t believe that she was dating a married man. He came back with, “You didn’t say that when you were sucking my dick the other night.”

I looked at Nina and saw rage in her eyes.
“Punta!”
she yelled. She said a few more words then grabbed a vase and hurled it at him. It hit the wall next to the door. Shards of glass went everywhere and he grabbed his face. “Geeeet the fuck out.” He saw her looking for something else to throw and turned to take off.

Once he was out the door he yelled back, “Good luck, man, you can have the bitch.”

“Your mama’s a bitch,” she shouted back.

I grabbed her and pulled her away from the door before she stepped on the glass. “Calm down, he’s gone, and I don’t think he’s coming back.”

She broke down in tears and ran up the steps. After I cleaned the glass up I joined her. She started trying to explain when I interrupted. “Hey, you don’t owe me any explanations. None of that matters…all that matters is that I love you and I’m here. I’m going to make everything right and I don’t care how long it takes. Your love is the energy that keeps my heart beating.”

When I said that she stopped and stared at me. She stood up in front of me and undressed. “Please forgive me.”

“I said you don’t owe me any apologies.”

“I wasn’t talking to you,” she whispered as she moved toward me. I wondered if it was hard for her, breaking her word and once again giving me her everything.