Double Heat [Twin Ties: 3] (35 page)

Evan asked him quietly, “Think we can switch shirts without Luka noticing?”

“I heard that and that was very mean!”

Brennan burst out laughing. Evan helplessly joined in with him and pulled the blanket over their heads as they both rolled over.

“That’s very mean, Evan! Or Brennan. Fuck, they sound the same too.”

There was a small pile of empty beer bottles next to the cooler. Evan had drank most of them. When he finished yet another one and moved to reach for the cooler’s lid again, Alek held him back with a hand and said, “Hey, slow down a little, okay? Have some water instead.”

Luka fished out a bottle of water and passed it to Alek, who passed it to Evan. Unscrewing the cap, Evan gazed down at the plastic crinkling a little inside his grip. Brennan didn’t like the look on his brother’s face. It hinted at reminiscences better left alone and not dredged up. The look on Evan’s face reminded Brennan of all of the times he’d scrolled through Tommy’s messages on his phone without telling anyone, keeping it all inside.

“You okay?” Brennan asked Evan with some obvious subtext woven into his tone.

Evan craned his neck back, looking up at the stars, seeming weighed down by everything running through his head. It made Brennan resolve to get Evan to try meditating. He needed to get some perspective on it all and learn how to stop carrying things he couldn’t change; things that wouldn't stop haunting him, even under the stars with those he loved the most.

“Are you?” Evan shot back, finally. He frowned a little. “I know you guys think I’m fucked up, but you don’t get it. You don’t understand what it was like. Alek and Luka, you had each other. Bren, you had Mom. I had no one. Charlie was fucking
gone
all the time.”

“Ev,” Luka said, “we get that. We do.”

“No!” Evan slurred. “You don’t. You can’t know what it was like to be a kid with no one around, even for the normal, boring shit.” He drank some of the water. Brennan was glad.

Getting up from where he’d been sitting next to Luka, across from Evan and Alek on the other side of the fire, Brennan walked around to him. He sat by Evan’s side, sandwiching him between himself and Alek. He nudged Evan’s shoulder and said, “Hey, we’re not the enemy here. Don’t think about that stuff if it’s bringing you down.”

“I know. But...” Evan sighed heavily. His frown eased and his tone softened. “It wasn’t all bad, you know? That’s what I’m trying to say. I
think
that’s what I’m trying to say.”

“What do you mean?” Alek asked.

Evan ran a hand through his hair, his eyes unfocused. Brennan rubbed Evan’s arm, trying to pull him back to the here and now.

“There was this one time. I’d been looking forward to it for a while. It was our date night and we watched the game together, ordered in pizza with everything.” Brennan shot a look over at Luka, who was clearly horrified already, though trying to hide his reaction for Evan’s sake. Catching Brennan’s gaze, Luka rubbed a hand over his mouth, then looked away, bowing his head. “It was great. It wasn’t any more than I could handle and it was really nice to have someone who liked me enough to hang out with on a Saturday night. I always felt like such a loser to never have any plans on the weekends.” Evan’s voice dropped even lower, though it still managed to fill the night. Brennan caught Alek’s gaze next, seeing his barely contained anger, directed only at Drew. “Near the end of the game,” Evan explained, “I started to feel awful. I was burning up and my stomach was... not good. I told Drew he should take off, that I didn’t want to be a hassle. But...” Evan smiled. He fucking smiled,
fondly
. “He stuck around, all goddamned night. I was puking and shivering and just a mess. The flu was hitting me really hard. He stayed with me; kept giving me water, making sure I had a cool washcloth for my forehead. He was really amazing. He was a good guy. I nearly passed out at one point, and I just kept thanking God that Drew was there so I wasn’t alone. It would have been really scary, if I had been.”

Brennan couldn’t breathe. He wouldn’t. He held his breath as a pair of tears spilled over his eyelids. Turning his head away, toward the night, he felt a hand – larger than his own – give it a strengthening squeeze where it was resting on the mattress behind Evan. Brennan pivoted his wrist and took Alek’s hand, holding on as tightly as he dared, trying to keep Evan from seeing him cry.

“Ev,” Luka sputtered, after a silence that had stretched too long. “That’s, uh....”

Brennan’s sob broke free. He clapped a hand over his mouth and saw Evan turn to look at him with shock.

“Why are you crying?” he asked, concerned, confused. “Bren....”

Brennan curled forward, hiding his face against his knees, gripping Alek’s hand. After a moment, Luka was there, too, drawing Brennan into a hug.

What was there to say? They all felt it—how very far Evan still had to go before he could see what he’d been through as clearly as the rest of them did. Drew had done an excellent job in selecting and grooming his victim. He’d preyed on someone defenseless and utterly vulnerable. They couldn’t take it back. They couldn’t undo Evan’s feelings, or force him to see Drew as the monster he was. They could only be patient and wait for him to get there on his own.

“Bren?” Evan asked meekly, gently touching his tear-damp cheek.

Suddenly, Brennan was letting go of Luka and embracing Evan instead, saying fiercely to him, “He didn’t deserve you, Ev. You deserved to be protected, not used. You deserved
so much better
.”

“Wishing I’d had you and Mom back then won’t change anything.”

“I know,” Brennan cried. “
I’m so sorry
.”

One of the twins caressed Brennan’s hair. He reached out, pulled Luka close and just tried to hope they could get through this, together.

Chapter 29
Scheming

Fairly early on Sunday morning, just as Luka and Evan were getting back from a run, they saw Jimmy’s car parked in front of their building. Cooling down and stretching out, they took a few minutes before heading inside to see what was up. Evan knew Jimmy had been talking to Luka whenever Evan and Brennan started dodging his calls, and it definitely fit the circumstances.

Unzipping his sweatshirt and pushing the hood back off of his head; Evan glanced up at Luka’s passable attempt to give nothing away. Evan wiped his brow and said, “You told him everything, didn’t you?”

“Not everything,” Luka countered a little defensively.

“What’s not everything?”

“I didn’t tell him anything you wouldn’t have told him yourself,” Luka clarified.

Evan leaned back against the brick wall by their front door. A cute redheaded woman walked past with a bulldog on a bright pink leash and said good morning to them, which he said in return before shifting his focus back to Luka. “That doesn’t help me much. There’s a lot I might tell Jimmy. There’s also a lot I specifically haven’t told Jimmy. Why’s he here? To get my side of the story?”

He felt really sweaty and wanted a shower, not a heart-to-heart with a well-meaning but nosy father figure over what had happened with Drew.

“Actually,” Luka said slowly, looking pretty guilty all of a sudden, “he’s probably here to talk about Brennan.”

“You’ve been scheming, haven’t you?”

“No,” Luka scoffed, tossing his hair back. “Well, maybe. But I have good intentions!”

“Do you know how many good intentions have seen me get well and truly fucked over? Do you?” Evan replied calmly.

Luka deflated a little, glancing away, toward the sunrise. “Yeah, I do. Look, if you don’t approve, you have full veto power. I promise.”

There had been a call, early that morning, from the local precinct. They’d issued a warrant for Drew’s arrest after finding incriminating evidence at his apartment. Drew hadn’t been there when they’d searched the place, and they hadn’t found him yet, as far as Evan knew. Drew had slipped away. Obviously, he had his hiding places. The warehouse proved as much. They hadn’t elaborated on what the incriminating evidence was, but Evan could guess.

“There’s no avoiding it now, anyway. Let’s just go in and talk it over.” Evan clapped Luka on the back, smiling bravely, then went inside. Luka came in behind and Evan saw him scan the sidewalks first, like the good bodyguard he was. It made Evan smile, to see Luka making an honest effort to safeguard them, even if it was kind of too little, too late. Nothing could happen to Evan that was worse than what he’d already faced. It was reassuring, actually, to know he was learning to survive all sorts of twisted shit, and beat the odds. He just hoped it kept up instead of turning around to bite him in the ass.

They got to the top of the steps and found Brennan, Alek, and Jimmy sitting in the living room, waiting for them.

“Good. You’re here,” Jimmy smiled. “They’ve been eager to hear what I have to say, but I told them it was better to wait, so....” He let out a heavy breath and seem to steel himself. “Evan, how are you?”

Covered in a thin layer of sweat from head to toe, Evan sighed and shrugged. “Same as ever, really. I’m fine. How are you?”

Jimmy frowned at that, looking so much like a concerned dad that Evan had to roll his eyes, which only seemed to make things worse as Jimmy’s frown deepened.

“Don’t do that,” Evan argued. “I’m not a kid. I’m fine. Believe the words coming out of my mouth, please.”

“But, you’ve been through a lot.”

Evan laughed, still a little winded from the run. They were all looking at him like they didn’t know what to say. He knew the feeling.

“Like I said, same as ever. But I’m here. I’m breathing, no open wounds or broken bones. Couldn’t ask for more, really. Plus I’ve got some extra support now, for the bad days.”

Luka came over, handing him a towel. Evan smiled in thanks before mopping his face dry. Luka gave him a kiss on the head and lingered there, at his side.

“I, um,” Evan added, dropping his gaze as the attention grew to be too much for him. “I kind of quit my job. Leave of absence or something. Gonna stick around here, help chauffeur Brennan for a while, maybe take up naked yoga.”

“I would
totally
teach you naked yoga,” Brennan smiled.

“Oh, I know,” Evan assured him. “I’m sure everyone appreciates the mental images we just gave them, too. Especially Jimmy.”

“If Drew found you through Mike’s then it’s a great idea to stay away from there for now,” Jimmy told him. “Can I just say one thing?”

Evan sighed, bracing himself.

“Next time, don’t let him get you in the car,” Jimmy said. “With crazy people like him, as soon as they get you to a deserted location, the odds of you surviving are slim. He could have done
anything
to you and no one would have been able—”

“Got it!” Evan shouted, talking over him to make him stop. “Got it. Thank you. Yes, I know. The cops said something similar, so yes. I understand now.”

“You haven’t told Charlie, have you?” Jimmy asked softly, like he knew the answer.

“Nope,” Evan said simply.

“Well, I’m sure the police will be verifying Charlie’s knowledge of Drew, so maybe expect a phone call or at least warn him not to go telling people of your whereabouts without asking you first.”

Evan bit his lip and grunted to show he understood, but his patience had worn thin.

“I thought you were here to talk about Brennan?” Evan asked, wanting more than anything for everyone’s focus to be on anything other than him and all of the ways he knew he’d fucked up.

“Why are you here to talk about me?” Brennan asked, wide-eyed. He glanced around at Evan, then Luka and Alek before settling on Jimmy.

Jimmy took a deep breath and pulled an envelope from his inside jacket pocket. Holding it in his hands, glancing first at Luka, who gave him a nod, Jimmy then looked Brennan in the eye.

“This is a gift, from me. Three tickets to Monroe, roundtrip. Two days, one night. Just long enough for a visit to the police station and maybe a nice dinner afterward to celebrate and relax a little. I also reserved two hotel rooms downtown. Luka and I will be accompanying you, if you agree to go with us. It won’t really work without you, so what do you say?”

Evan rubbed a hand over his mouth; feeling overwhelmed by the display of Jimmy’s care for Evan’s other half. After everything they’d been through with Charlie, it was almost too good to be true to witness not only Jimmy’s acceptance of Brennan, but willingness to make such a grand gesture, just to help keep Brennan from harm. Maybe sensing his reaction to Jimmy’s offer, Luka slung an arm around Evan and drew him in for a sweaty sideways hug.

Alek had his arm around Brennan and Brennan looked at him then, as if trying to see if Alek had known about this ahead of time or not. That he appeared just as dumbstruck as Brennan seemed to help set him at ease. Alek rubbed Brennan’s back and Brennan leaned in, as if needing the comfort of Alek to get through.

“Yeah, okay,” Brennan said softly. He seemed very small, then, and very scared. Alek gathered him up in a hug that mirrored Luka and Evan’s.

“You can do this,” Alek told him tenderly. “This’ll be so good for you. I know it’s scary, and I know it feels futile sometimes to hope the system will come through and work, but you’re not doing this alone, okay?”