Forever and Almost Always (16 page)

“Dax, do you hear me?”

“Charlee, please. Please don’t leave right now. I’m afraid if you walk out that door, you won’t come back.”

“I’ll always come back, Dax, but I can’t guarantee that I will stay. I just need some time to sort all of this out. I’ll be back later.”

I reached out for her, to kiss her, hug her, to show her that I was still the same guy she fell in love with, but she was gone. She didn’t stop to say good-bye, she just left. Without even thinking, I called Trevor and asked him to come get me. I couldn’t stay in that apartment without her there. She was everywhere, and it was making it hard to think.

I knew what I had to do before Charlee got back, and I was dreading going to Rachael’s house more than anything in this world. As I stood at her front door, ready to knock, all I could think about was wanting to go back in time and fix this fucked up mistake.

When Rachael answered the door, the anger started to seep into me. I had no compassion for this girl, and no sympathy for her either. Rachael was a bad person to her very core. I don’t say that because of what happened, I say that because it’s true. I wasn’t the first guy to apparently get her pregnant, and I’m sure I wouldn’t be the last. But, I needed answers and I wasn’t willing to wait any longer.

“We need to talk.” I held my anger back, trying to get her to be as cooperative as possible.

“Well it’s about time you came to your senses.”

The minute the words left her mouth, I wanted to punch something. In all honestly, I
wanted
to punch her, but I would never hit a girl. Not even a girl as manipulative as this bitch standing in front of me.

Chapter Twenty-Six

Charlee

There were no words left for me to say to him. Not until he had answers for me. It hurt my heart to see the look on his face when I told him that I was leaving. I knew he would automatically assume the worst, but he deserved to squirm a bit. I knew all of this happened before him and I even got together, but I was having the hardest time trying to understand it all. I would never leave him because he had a child with someone else, but it was tearing me up inside trying to imagine how our lives would be, having to deal with that revolting, spiteful bitch.

I didn’t really go to my mom’s. My mom’s house was actually the last place I wanted to be. I needed to feel a sense of peace. I needed tranquility and there was no way I was going to find that anywhere around here. So I found myself sitting at the dock, the very dock where Dax and I shared our first kiss. And I found myself wondering how we got here? How did we get to this place? And most of all, how do we get back to where we were just a day ago?”

As the sun started to set, I realized it was probably time for me to head home. I couldn’t stand being away from Dax, no matter how pissed off I was at him, and we needed to figure this out. After I parked in the apartment parking lot, I sat there for a few minutes trying to regain my composure. I wasn’t sure what waited for me when I walked through that door, but I couldn’t put off the inevitable.

I took in a deep breath as I pushed open our door, and was shocked when I didn’t see Dax anywhere. We lived in a studio apartment. Our bedroom was our living room. You could see our kitchen and bathroom from every angle, and he was nowhere to be found. What the fuck was wrong with him?

I threw my purse and keys across the room and grabbed a pair of pajamas to change into. I didn’t care at this point if it was only eight o’clock at night. I was so ready for this day to be over. When I came out of the bathroom, Dax still hadn’t showed up, furthering my rage. I yanked back the covers, climbed in to bed, and faced away from the front door. Even if he did come home tonight, there was no way in hell I was going to give him the time of day. Not after this.

I must’ve fallen asleep, because the next thing I remember hearing is Dax stumbling through the door. I knew Dax well enough to know when he was drunk, and he was definitely drunk tonight. When Dax climbed into bed a few minutes later, the mattress dipped and I squeezed my eyes tightly shut so he wouldn’t even try to talk to me.

His hand slipped around my waist, as he pulled me back into his chest, hard. The aroma of booze floated through the air assaulting my nostrils, and I had to hold back the vomit that was rising in my throat.

“Charlee? Charlee, are you awake?”

I didn’t move a muscle. My body sat perfectly still as Dax continued to try and hold me against him, hoping and wishing I would turn around in his arms and forgive him.

“Baby, please talk to me. I
need
you to talk to me.”

“Dax, shut up and go to sleep. We will talk in the morning.”

“But Charlee-“

“NO DAX! Go to sleep, now. And stop touching me, you smell like a distillery.”

His hands slowly released my body, and I felt him move away from me. After that, his light snoring let me know it was safe to finally fall asleep.

Morning came all too soon. The smell of bacon and eggs filled the entire apartment, and I knew that it was going to be a long day. I didn’t get out of bed after I woke up. I sat up and leaned against the wall, waiting for Dax to start his groveling.

“Oh good you’re awake. How did you sleep?”

I rolled my eyes, but still answered him. “Not so good. My boyfriend apparently knocked up a girl, then took off, and then when I told him I would be back to talk to him, he showed up at who knows what time, drunk as all hell. Yeah, I slept peachy.”

“Baby, I’m really sorry about last night. For all of it. But I have answers for you now. We can get through this.”

“Dax, that’s great that you have answers for me now, but I was ready to hear them last night, and you apparently had better things to do.”

Dax brought me over a plate of food and sat it on the nightstand next to me. “I made you breakfast.”

“Thanks.” I muttered.

“Do you want to hear the answers now?”

“Sure.”

“Well, I went to see Rachael after you left. Charlee, I can’t lose you and I knew if I didn’t have answers for you, that I would. So I went and got them for you. She’s not pregnant anymore. Her mom even confirmed it. She’s not pregnant anymore.”

I could hear the excitement and relief in his voice, but I was finding it hard to feel the same way he was. Of course I was over the moon to hear that our lives could go back to normal, but all the hiding of things and the lying, and then leaving me? I wasn’t sure if I was going to be able to get over that.

“Did you hear me, Charlee? She’s not pregnant.”

“I heard you, Dax. And that’s fantastic that she’s not pregnant, but that doesn’t make up for the lying and the deceit. That doesn’t make up for you walking out on me, twice.”

“I know baby, and I’m so sorry. I promise it will never happen again. If you could just forgive me. Just give me a chance to show you how much I absolutely love and adore you. Please, Charlee.”

With every word he spoke, my heart broke a little more. I wasn’t willing to let go of him, of us. What we have is something I never felt before and I wasn’t willing to let it all go, because I was too damn stubborn to let
this
go.

My fingers slipped through his and I pulled him closer to me. My arms wrapped around his neck and I held onto him as though I would never see him again. “I forgive you, Dax. I forgive you.” And just like that, we were us again. Before I could say anything more, Dax was pulling back from me and holding me at arms length.

“There’s something else I need to tell you.”

Great. Just when I thought everything was going to be fine, then he goes and says the one little sentence that held the power to change my entire world.

“I got us the one bedroom. I got it. I went to the landlord this morning, and there is one available. It’s right downstairs by the pool. It’s the corner unit and it’s ready for us whenever we’re ready.”

I sat there shaking my head, “Seriously? You had that look on your face, because of an apartment? You can’t do that, Dax.” I was completely caught off guard when he started laughing.

“I’m so sorry, baby. Did you think it was something bad?”

“Well yeah.” I giggled under my breath, and Dax continued to fall into hysterics. “You suck!” I pushed against him, but he grabbed my arms and pulled me underneath him, pinning me to the bed.

“Can we get to the make up part now?”

Before I could get my answer out, his lips were crushed against mine. His tongue slid across my lower lip, but there was no way I was going to allow him to skip past the me being upset part.

“Dax, stop.”

He flung himself back on the bed and let out a loud sigh. “I thought we were okay now?”

“We are, Dax, but you have to give me a little bit of time to get over it.”

“Well how much time, Charlee? This is bullshit. I fixed the situation, isn’t that what you wanted?”

My brows pulled together as confusion settled in. “What do you mean, you fixed the situation?”

Dax jumped up off of the bed and started getting dressed. “I’m going to go tell the landlord that we’re going to move today. Work for you? Good. I’ll grab some boxes from him also.”

“DAX, WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU FIXED THE SITUATION?” I was now screaming at a closed door and ten times more frustrated than I already was. I threw the covers off of me and started grabbing everything out of the closet. I didn’t waste my time folding anything, seems how we were literally moving only twenty feet away.

Once I had the closet cleared out, then I started pulling all of the dishes, pots, pans, and utensils out of all of the cupboards. When Dax walked in a little while later, I didn’t expect him to walk in laughing. Or for there to be another person with him. I turned around and faced Dax and Trevor in nothing but my underwear. I leaned back against the kitchen counter with my hands on either side of me, holding me up. I watched as Dax’s face turned every shade of red you could imagine. Trevor just stood there next to Dax, mouth dropped open, eyes firmly fixed on my bare breasts.

“Dude, stop looking.” Dax punched Trevor so hard in the arm that he quickly turned and walked out the door.

“Charlee, what the fuck do you think you’re doing?” He was rummaging through my drawers, trying to find something to cover me up with.

“This, I pointed at my half naked body, is not my fault. I didn’t know you were bringing Trevor back with you. I was just packing like you asked me to.”

“That’s bullshit and you know it.” He was now standing firmly in front of me, his hands on mine as he leaned in towards my face. “But you do look, damn good packing like that.”

“Ah, flattery will get you nowhere right now.”

He pushed back from the counter and started walking towards the door. “Then could you at least put a shirt on? My friends don’t need to see any part of
my
girl.” The door clicked behind him and I knew that he was giving me a minute to put something on, but I wasn’t so sure that he would be happy with my choice of outfit.

When him and Trevor walked in a couple minutes later, I was back in the kitchen finishing what I had started.

“You call that covering up? Charlee, I don’t know what the fuck your problem is today, but could you please, put on some decent clothes?”

I looked down at the sheer tank top and matching shorts I had pulled on, and laughed. I laughed loud and strong and damn it, it felt great to laugh. When I couldn’t get myself under control, Dax made is way over to me. He pulled me tightly into his chest and hugged me with more love and understanding, than I thought possible for him. He knew what I was doing. He knew I was trying to get his attention. He knew I needed time to process everything, and most of all, he knew that I wasn’t backing down from something he owed me.

When I finally caught my breath, I hugged him back and placed a chaste kiss to his cheek. “I’ll get dressed.”

“Thank you.” He sighed as he released me.

~ ~ ~ ~

It only took the three of us, about an hour to move all of our stuff down to the other apartment. It wasn’t much more spacious than the other one, but at least our bedroom wasn’t in our living room. My mom even gave us part of her sectional couch, so we would have living room furniture. It wasn’t much, but it was our home. It was the place I felt the safest with the man I loved more than anything.

Trevor was lounging on the couch watching TV, when Dax came up behind me, wrapping his strong arms around my tiny waist. I closed my eyes and breathed him in as he tenderly placed his chin on my shoulder.

“You know I love you, right?”

I nodded, not ready to speak about the incident that happened this morning. I was determined to make this the best thing for the both of us.

“Charlee, I would do anything for you. I hope you know that.”

“I know that, Dax. I do. Hey good news, Smokey is moving in with us.”

“What?”

Smokey was my cat. I had gotten him when I was eighteen. It was the one thing I had always wanted when I first moved out of my mom’s house, and lucky for me she let me bring him with me, when I had to move back in. He was an orange tabby with absolutely no neck and a personality exactly like mine. Needless to say, I didn’t bestow him his name. When I had first gotten him, I needed someone to watch him while I went to work. I was dating one of the guys that worked at the sandwich place next to the dry cleaners I worked at, and his friend offered to watch him for me. It was his second day with me and I was having a hard time trying to name him. When I went to pick him up that night, the guy who had been watching him had gotten him high and said he liked it. He named him Smokey, and I guess it stuck, unlike the relationship. That ended that night, and I never looked back.

“My mom can’t take care of him, he’s not hers. I told her I would go get him tonight. He’s my cat, Dax. I can’t just get rid of him.”

“I know, baby. It’s fine. I like him. We can be our own little family now.”

I smiled a wide genuine smile at the thought of us being a family. I knew I was nowhere near ready to get married, let alone start a family, but one thing I did know, was that I wanted it with Dax.