Forever and Almost Always (18 page)

Taylor and I exchanged glances. It was bad. Trevor’s entire face was swelling up, and all Taylor and I could think to do was laugh.

“This isn’t fucking funny you guys.”

The entire car was filled with laughter as Trevor sat back and freaked the fuck out. Dax tried to calm him down as much as he could, but it wasn’t working. Just as Trevor reached for the door handle, I made the quick decision to pull over. I’m lucky I pulled over when I did, because Trevor jumped out of the car as it slowed, and immediately started vomiting all over the side of the highway. I looked back at Dax wondering what we should do.

“He’ll be fine, baby. Don’t even worry about it.”

“His face is bad, Dax.”

“I know. We will just give it some time and see if it goes away. If not, we will take him to the hospital when we get to Vegas.”

I wasn’t sure if it was the right thing to do, but I was trusting Dax when it came to his friend. “Okay.” I could see Taylor’s face out of the corner of my eye and saw that she was busting up. “Taylor, be nice.” I warned.

“I will be, but did you see his face? What the hell is wrong with it?”

I shrugged my shoulders and quietly laughed along with her. Trevor got back into the car a little while later and quickly passed out in the back seat. I had Dax checking on him every so often to make sure the swelling was going down, and luckily it was.

When we rolled onto the strip, I woke everyone up so that we could figure out what hotel to stay at. It was almost midnight, and I wasn’t sure if we would even get a room, but luckily the Motel 8 had two rooms left. It wasn’t glamorous by any means, but I was so exhausted I really didn’t care where we slept.

“You two okay with sharing a room?” I looked at Taylor when I asked to see if she would give me a face.

“Yeah, that’s totally fine with me. Are you okay with that, Trevor?”

“Yeah, now that my face looks normal. No thanks to you assholes.”

We all burst into a fit of laughter, but quickly shut up when the desk clerk showed up. We got our room keys and headed outside to find our rooms. We were staying right next to each other, which I guess was a good thing, but Taylor was starting to look aggravated, so I pulled her aside.

“Hey, are you sure you’re okay with this?”

“I guess I really don’t have a choice now, do I?”

“Hey, I don’t know why you’re pissed at me. I didn’t plan this little impromptu trip, you all did. I’m sorry.”

“Whatever. I’m just bored and tired. Are we just going to bed?”

Given the fact that Trevor and myself were the only ones that were twenty-one, there really wasn’t much else for us to do. “What do you want to do?”

“Let’s walk down the strip for a little bit.”

“Okay, go get dressed and I’ll get Dax moving.”

I went into our room and closed the door quietly behind me. “Hey, Taylor wants to go walk the strip for a little bit.”

“Seriously? It’s midnight and I’m tired. Can’t we just go to bed?” He was saying go to bed, but what he meant was, can we have sex and then go to bed, and I wasn’t really in the mood.

“Just for a little bit, babe?”

“Fine. Let’s go.”

Twenty minutes into our walk, Taylor started bitching about how her feet hurt and that this trip was pointless because her and Dax weren’t twenty-one. That was my cue to get everyone back to the hotel.

“Guys, let’s just go to sleep.”

The minute my head hit the pillow on the bed, I was out. I was completely exhausted and was in no mood to have sex with Dax. I could barely move my limbs, that’s how tired I was. The next morning, I woke up happy and refreshed. I couldn’t wait to become Dax’s wife, and start our lives as a married couple. There was just one hiccup in his little plan. Dax had brought zero money, and we were down to our last thirty dollars in our account.

“You seriously didn’t bring any money? Was this all just a big joke to you?”

“Of course not, Charlee. Why would you even think that?”

“Because Dax, if you really wanted to marry me, you would’ve thought to bring money or something. Did you really think we could just get married for free?”

“Of course not, I guess I just spaced it out.”

“How are we even going to get home?”

Before he could answer, there was a knock at our door. I was busy shoving all of my clothes back in my bag to answer it, so Dax made his way over to do it. I knew it was Trevor and Taylor, but I was fuming, and there was no way in hell I wanted to deal with their shit this morning.

“Hey guys, we have to head home, like now.”

Taylor’s voice struck me as odd, and then it dawned on me. “Dean knows your here, huh?”

“Yeah and he’s livid. He says if I don’t have
his
car back to him before he has to go to work at four, that he’s going to call the cops.”

“That’s an awesome boyfriend you got there, Tay.” Trevor was being a dick, a big dick and I was having a hard time understanding those two.

“Well, we’re not getting married anyway. Dax didn’t bring any money and there is no money in our account. Honestly, I don’t even know how we are going to get home.” I gave Dax the death stare as I walked past him, bag in hand. Taylor and Trevor exchanged a weird glance, and then followed me down to the car. “What happened between you two last night that is making you guys all weird?”

“Nothing happened. Let’s just go.” Taylor was definitely pissed about something.

I don’t know why I stopped at the gas station, given that we had no gas money, but I did. That’s when Trevor saved the day, kind of.

“I’ll pay. Don’t even worry about it.”

We all looked at one another confused by how Trevor even had money, but we shrugged it off and let him pay. The entire car ride back home was awkward and unsettling. The tension between Dax and I was thick and whatever did or didn’t happen with Taylor and Trevor was hanging in the air as well.

As I pulled up to the apartment, I said good-bye to Taylor, quickly grabbed my bag and then headed to our place. We didn’t speak the rest of the day, and I knew from this moment on, things would be different.

Chapter Twenty-Nine

Dax

Charlee and I had been
off
since we got back from Vegas. I understood how she felt to a point, but I honestly didn’t understand why it was that big of a deal. Things had died down. We started talking again, but our sex life was slowly circling the drain, and to add insult to injury, her mom just told her that she was moving to Utah to be closer to Charlee’s brother and his kids.

Charlee hadn’t said much about it since she found out, but I knew the decision she was faced with, was hard for her. I never doubted the way Charlee felt about me, but when it came to her family, she just couldn’t let go. I didn’t expect her to stay with me, and I knew that’s what she was struggling with. Of course I
wanted
her to stay, but I would never ask Charlee to choose, but her mom did.

When Charlee came home later that afternoon, I was elated to see her. I had made us a nice dinner and even set up our small coffee table with candles and everything. I popped up from the floor with a bright smile and planted a kiss right on her mouth. It wasn’t anything romantic, but it was my way of showing her that I loved her, regardless of how this all turned out.

“I made us dinner. You hungry?”

“Starving actually. It’s beautiful, Dax. Thanks.”

“Anything for my girl. Come sit by me and we’ll eat. So how did it go with your mom?”

“She’s leaving in a week. She already packed all my stuff for me and told me she needed to know whether or not to take it with her or drop it off here.”

“Seriously?”

“Dax, I told her to take it with her.”

My heart stopped. Literally, for about five seconds I swear my heart stopped. The girl I had every intention on making my wife, was leaving me. “Wait! What?”

She reached out for my hand, and I let her take it. “Dax, you know how close I am with my family. If they leave, I have nothing left here.”

“You have me.” I muttered.

“You know what I mean. Look at us Dax. For the last two months we’ve barely had sex. We barely talk to each other. Hell, we can’t even agree on what shows to watch at night. Everything changed that night. Everything. And I can honestly say, that if we would’ve gotten married in Vegas, I wouldn’t be leaving. I want you to come with me, Dax.”

“You know I can’t. My friends are here. My life is here.”

“Dax, you don’t even speak to your father who used to live right up the street from you. Your mom lives in Florida, and the only people you even really hang out with, is Trevor. You seriously would rather stay here in our tiny ass apartment, in the middle of the ghetto, just to stay close to him?”

With every word that crossed her lips, a little piece of me broke. I knew our apartment wasn't anything fancy, but it was ours. And yeah we may live in a shitty neighborhood, but at least we were together, and I would always protect her from anything bad. I knew the day I met her, that I wasn’t good enough for her. I tried to convince myself over the course of our relationship, that it didn’t matter. That she loved me for me, but right now, in this moment, she was proving me right.

“I’ve tried to give you everything, Charlee. I’ve tried to provide a life for us, one that you loved at one point. I’ve tried to be the man you need and want me to be, but if I was, if I was that man, you wouldn't be choosing your family. You’d be choosing me.”

I stood up from the table and cleared my plate. I had completely lost my appetite and this conversation was about to take a turn for the worse. I was about to push her so far away, that she would never want to come back. But I had to. I had to preserve what was left of my heart and me. I couldn’t show her that it was tearing me apart inside to hear her say she wanted to leave.

“Maybe you’re right, Charlee. Maybe our relationship has ran its course. You should go. Go be with your family.”

“What are you saying?”

“I’m saying, I don't love you enough to go with you.”

“You’re so full of shit, and you know it. You’re just scared.”

“No Charlee, I’m not. We’re done.”

She quickly stood up and walked towards me, “Tell me we can still at least talk. Tell me we can try to work this out.”

“I can’t, and I don’t stay friends with my exes. I just don’t do it. If we break up now, you won’t ever hear from me again.”

I reached out and caught the stray tear that had fallen down her cheek. I would miss everything about this girl. I would miss her smile, her laugh; I would even miss how god damned stubborn she was about everything. I stood there, memorizing her face, so that I could always see her. We stood in silence, just staring at one another. Not touching or making any movement, we just stood there and stared. And when she finally looked away, I knew her choice had been made.

I sat in the living room while Charlee packed. It hurt to see her doing it far too much for me to stay in the same room with her. Eventually, it became too much for me to handle all together. I walked into our room, grabbed my jacket and keys and started heading towards the door. I knew I was about to cry for the first time in forever, and I couldn’t let her see me like that. I needed her to choose me because she loved me, not because she felt sorry for me.

“Dax, wait. Where are you going?”

I didn’t turn around. My hand stayed tight around the doorknob as I spoke around the lump in my throat. “I have stuff to do. I can’t watch you leave me. Oh, and you can’t take the cat.”

“I’m sorry, Dax.”

“No you’re not.” I grumbled as I slammed the door behind me. I called Trevor to have him come get me, but I waited outside of the small walkway for him. I didn’t know how I was going to get through this, or even if I would, but she needed to be set free. Who knows, maybe one day she would come back.

Chapter Thirty

Charlee

I had been gone for about three months now, and not a second went by that I didn’t think about him. Everywhere I went, I swear I could find his face in any crowd. Every night before I went to bed, I silently prayed that he would come for me, but he never did. I made sure to keep my same number when I moved, just in case he wanted to get a hold of me, but he never did that either. He really was over me. I talked to Taylor every single day, and every day she would say the same thing.

“I don’t know where he is, or what he’s doing. All I know is that he still lives in the apartment.”

It broke my heart, knowing that I had broken his. My heart ached on a constant basis and no matter what I did, I couldn’t make the pain go away. I knew what would fix it. I knew if I went back, that we could have a real chance at being together, but I was scared. I was afraid that no matter how hard I tried, or no matter what I did, he would reject me.

When month four came, I was starting to get extremely depressed and my mom started to get really worried. “Mom, I’m fine. Just leave it alone. I have to get to work.”

“Okay honey, but can we talk when you get home?”

“Sure. I’ll see you later.”

I was lucky to have found the job that I did, when I first moved here. I made really good money being the receptionist at one of the biggest homebuilders in Utah. The people were nice enough and I didn’t mind the long hours, because it kept my mind busy. I got paid every week, and every week I would drink my paycheck away. It wasn’t any way to live, but for now, this was how I was coping.

It was right around lunchtime, when I got the call from Taylor that would forever change my life. “Hey Taylor, what’s going on?”

“So much. Well, you know how I’ve been seeing Trevor still, and I’m sorry for that, but he just told me that Dax misses you like crazy and wants you back. The only thing is, well…”

“Just tell me Taylor.”

“He won’t go there to get you back. He says that if you really love him, that you would call him.”

“So?”

“So call him, you dumb ass. Honestly, I don’t even know why I try with you two.”

“Have you seen him lately?”