Give Me a Reason (47 page)

“Yes,” Laura said, playfully pushing Toni away. “Fine, tell
your stories, show your pictures—”

“Oh, my God, I should get the scrapbooks!” Eleanor said.

“
No
!” Laura said, stomping
her foot. “We’re supposed to be decorating the tree tonight. If you pull those
out, we’ll never get finished.”

Sending a wink in Toni’s direction, Eleanor returned to the
storage box, and over the next quarter hour she uncovered ornaments displaying
fire trucks, dogs, starships and princesses, and they all found their way to
the tree. Pulling the last one from the box, she handed it to Toni and then
watched as confusion swept over her face as she stared at the dull black bauble
in her hand.

“It was her goth year,” Eleanor said flatly.

“Goth year?” Toni asked. Raising an eyebrow, she turned to
stare at Laura. “
You
had a
goth
year?”

“No, I think it lasted about two weeks,” Laura said,
snatching the ornament from Toni’s hand. “And I also wanted to dye my hair
black and get my lip pierced, but Mum refused to allow it.”

“Good woman,” Bill chimed in, smiling at Eleanor as she
opened the last box.

“These are more mementos than tree decorations, I’m afraid,”
Eleanor said as she pushed aside the crumpled tissue paper. “Oh, wait, here are
a few more.”

Pointing to a stack of papers tied in ribbon, Bill asked,
“What are those?”

“Oh, they’re some cards Laura drew when she was a child
before buying became the norm.”

“Can I see them?”

“Of course,” Eleanor said, handing the stack to Bill.

Returning to the box, she uncovered a few more vintage
ornaments, the last of which was a heavy crystal pendant with the words
First Christmas
engraved on the glass. Handing it to
Laura, Eleanor said, “Your father gave me that…years and years ago. Please be
careful with it.”

“Sure, Mum,” Laura said, glancing briefly at the leaded glass
ornament before finding a strong branch to hold its weight.

After placing a few of the antique metal angels and sleighs
that had been buried in the boxes around the room, they gathered the discarded
tissue paper and straightened the lounge. About to close the storage box,
Eleanor looked up to ask Bill for the cards, but the words died in her throat.

Pulling away the ribbon, he had in his hands memories shared
by two. Folded paper decorated with crayons showed trees of red and dogs of
blue, lopsided suns and crooked houses, and a family of three that soon became
two as the tall stick figure standing next to the curly-headed one disappeared.
Letters too difficult for a child of three or four to tackle were written every
which way across the pages. Some were large and others were small and sometimes
backward, but their message repeated in every card...
I
love you, Mum
. Reading the words, Bill’s eyes filled with tears, and as
emotions rose in his throat, his hands began to shake.

“Why don’t you girls go to the kitchen and put some biscuits
on a plate?”

“In a minute, Mum, let me just finish—”

Laura stopped when Toni grabbed her arm and motioned toward
the kitchen. Tilting her head, she was about to ask why, when she looked over
to see her mother kneeling by Bill. It was more than obvious that the man was
crying.

“What was that about?” Laura asked, once they reached the
kitchen.

Glancing back into the lounge, as she watched Eleanor
continue to comfort Bill, Toni whispered, “I think it’s about a father
realizing just how much he missed.”

***

“I made us some tea,” Toni said in a whisper, walking into
the bedroom.

“Why are you whispering? My mother always reads before she
goes to bed. She’ll be awake for a few more hours, trust me.”

“I have no doubt,” Toni said with a crooked smile. “How was
your bath?”

“It would have been better if you had joined me,” Laura said,
and then noticing Toni’s expression, she added, “Why the silly grin?”

“Um…no reason,” Toni said, putting the tea on the nightstand.
Going to the dresser, she pulled out a clean pair of pajama bottoms and a
T-shirt, and tossing them on the bed, began to get changed.

“Toni?”

“Yeah?”

“What are you hiding?”

“Nothing…see,” Toni said, pulling her sweater over her head.

Although the sight of Toni wearing only a white bra and tight
black jeans nudged Laura’s libido, for a moment she pushed away the awareness
between her legs and concentrated on the subject at hand.

“You’re only flippant when you don’t want me to know
something. Now, what is it?”

“Laura, I seriously don’t think—”

“Antoinette Vaughn, either you tell me—”

“Your mum isn’t reading.”

“What?”

“Your mum isn’t reading.”

“I heard what you said, but why does it matter what my mother
is doing?”

“It doesn’t. Good point!” Toni said. Turning on her heel, she
disappeared into the bathroom and quickly shut the door.

A few minutes later, she returned to find Laura sitting
cross-legged on the bed staring back at her.

“Toni?”

“Yeah.”

“Did my…did Bill go home?”

“Um…no, apparently not.”

“Is he in the lounge?”

“No, actually I...I didn’t see him in there.”

“Did you see him…anywhere?”

“Um…no. No, I didn’t.”

Scrunching up her face, Laura squeaked, “Did you hear him?”

“Actually…actually, I did.”

With a groan, Laura fell back on the bed and covered her face
with a pillow.

Laughing, Toni said, “You know, they
are
adults.”

Pulling away the pillow, Laura said, “We’ve already had this
discussion, and I know they’re adults, but knowing that my...that Bill and my
mother are downstairs right now probably...well, probably...well, you
know
what they’re probably doing. It’s just plain
weird!”

Putting her jeans in the dresser, Toni said over her
shoulder, “Well, you’d best get used to it, because by the sounds of it, they
really enjoy doing it.”

Hearing no response, Toni turned around just in time to get
slammed in the face with a pillow. Picking it up, she climbed into bed with a
smile on her face. “Sorry, but I just couldn’t resist,” she said, leaning in to
kiss Laura on the cheek.

“I’m not sure which is worse, hearing all those stories about
my decorating efforts when I was a child, or the fact that you’re going to
continue to remind me that my…that Bill and my mother are sleeping together.”

“Don’t forget about the scrapbooks,” Toni said as she pulled
Laura into her arms.

Relaxing into the warmth of the woman, Laura sighed and
closed her eyes, but when Toni ran her tongue down her ear and begin to nibble
on the lobe, Laura’s eyes popped open. “What are you doing?”

“Grazing.”

Smiling, Laura said, “Toni.”

“Yeah?”

“This bedroom is right above my mother’s.”

“So?”

“They could hear us.”

“You’ve already proven you can be quiet, and I want you.”

“Sweetheart, I think maybe we should wait. Mum mentioned
doing some shopping tomorrow so we’ll have the house to ourselves.”

Pulling back, Toni asked, “Are you serious?”

“I’m afraid so, sweetheart. Knowing they’re down there doing
what they’re doing...well, it just kind of puts a damper on things for me.”

“Shit,” Toni said, falling back on her pillow.

“I’m sorry, but I think we should just get some sleep.”

Staring at the ceiling, Toni took a long breath, exhaling slowly
in hopes it would help convince her lower half to behave itself, but when it
didn’t work, she climbed out of bed. Placing a kiss on Laura’s forehead, she
said, “I’m not really that tired. Get some sleep. I’m going to go and read in
the other room for a while. Okay?”

“Are you mad at me?”

“I’m not mad, Laura, I’m randy,” Toni said, smiling as she
straightened the quilt. “I’m just going to read for an hour or so and then I’ll
come to bed. I promise.”

“Okay. Good night, sweetheart.”

“Good night, darling.”

***

An hour later, Toni looked up as Laura walked into the room.
“Hey, I thought you were asleep.”

“I dozed off for a few, but it’s hard to sleep when you’re
not there.”

“Sorry,” Toni said, putting down her book. “I’ll come to
bed.” Swinging her long legs off the bed, before she could stand, Laura came
over and blocked her path.

“Not so fast, Miss Vaughn.”

“Huh?”

“
This
bedroom is over the
office.”

Laura’s words acted like a switch, and the sexual cravings
Toni had managed to scold into silence returned instantly. Before she could
blink, Laura kissed her, and open-mouthed and hungry, Toni answered in kind
until their lips were swollen with passion. Although Toni had been the one who
had admitted she was horny, Laura was coming in a close second, and wasting no
time, she pulled the T-shirt from Toni’s body and pushed her to the bed.

“Can you be quiet?” Laura asked, reaching for the waistband
of Toni’s pajamas.

“I promise. Oh, Laura...I promise.”

Seconds later, Toni was naked, and wearing only her pajama
top, Laura climbed onto the bed and smiled as Toni opened her legs. With the
help of the light coming from the bedside lamp, Laura could see the glistening
folds and sliding her hand lower, she murmured, “God, you’re wet.”

Biting her lip, Toni spread her legs even wider, and grasping
fistfuls of sheets, she didn’t make a sound when Laura pushed two fingers deep
inside.

Laura had been the one who had remained mute the day they
left for Scotland. Standing in their bedroom, she had refused to utter a sound
as Toni sat between her legs, tonguing her to orgasm, but Toni was finding it
hard to do the same. Pressing her lips together, she struggled to remain quiet
as Laura stroked with skilled precision, but they both soon realized that
Toni’s silence wouldn’t be the issue. When Toni began to match Laura’s rhythm,
the iron bed frame announced its age with an ear-splitting squeak that seemed
to echo through the room.

“Shit,” Laura whispered, placing her hand on Toni’s belly to
quiet her movement. “Sweetheart, I’m sorry, but you can’t move. The bed...it’s
making too much noise.”

Groaning her disapproval, Toni said, “Laura, I can be quiet,
but for God’s sake, you can’t ask me not to move. That’s...that’s like asking
me not to breathe.”

Thinking for a moment, Laura pulled away and climbed off the
bed. Seeing the frustration etched on Toni’s face, Laura said quietly, “The
floor, Toni. Get on the floor.”

As soon as Toni stood, Laura pulled the duvet and pillows
from the bed, and allowing them to puddle at their feet, she pushed Toni down
into the softness.

Their lips met in a hungry kiss, and as her hand slipped
between Toni’s thighs once more, Laura whispered, “Now…where were we?”

Chapter Forty-Five

“You’re up early,” Eleanor said, shuffling into the kitchen.

Looking up he smiled at the sleepy-eyed woman staring back at
him. “Good morning to you, too.”

“Whatcha doing?”

“I thought I’d make my girls some breakfast,” Bill said,
turning around and pulling Eleanor into his arms.

Their lips met in a slow good morning kiss, and then resting
her head on his shoulder, she said, “I like that.”

“What?”

“You calling us your girls.”

“Good,” he said, placing a kiss on her forehead.

Glancing at the clock on the wall, Eleanor said, “I’d best go
wake them up.”

“It’s still early. Let them sleep.”

“I would, except the ladies from church will be over tonight
to pick up the biscuits I promised them, and we haven’t begun to make them yet.
Be right back.”

A few minutes later, Eleanor stood in the hallway with a
puzzled look on her face. She had knocked three times and called out their
names twice, but having yet to receive a response she shrugged and opened their
door. Seeing that the bed was empty, Eleanor was about to look out the window
to see if Laura’s car was gone, when she noticed the door leading to the other
bedroom was open. Without thinking twice, she went over and looked inside.
Seeing Laura and Toni asleep on the floor, Eleanor frowned and then crept back
the way she came. Reaching the hallway, she closed the door and rapped loudly on
the frame. “Laura! Toni! You awake?”

Eleanor patiently waited, knowing her pounding would have
woken the dead and finally the door opened a crack. Seeing her daughter peeking
through the opening, Eleanor said, “Sorry, I know it’s early, but I wanted to let
you know that your father is making us all breakfast. That is, if you’re
interested?”

“Oh…um…okay. Sounds good. We’ll be down in a tick.”

“Good, I’ll let him know.”

***

Standing at the sink washing the breakfast dishes, Eleanor
asked, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Tell you what?” Laura asked, stacking two more plates on the
counter.

“That Toni had sleeping issues.”

“What are you talking about?”

“If she needed a harder mattress or even a cot, I could have
arranged it.”

“Mum, what the hell are you talking about? Toni doesn’t have
any sleeping issues. She has the occasional nightmare, but that hasn’t happened
in a while.”

“Then why were you two sleeping on the floor?”

Laura’s mouth dropped open and staring at her mother, she
asked hesitantly, “You were in our room?”

“This morning when I knocked and you didn’t answer I let
myself in and found you both on the floor in the other room. I just assumed—”

Eleanor lost her ability to speak when she saw Laura arch a
single eyebrow, her eyes gleaming with humor as she stared back at her mother.
Realizing her mistake, a blush to end all blushes crossed Eleanor’s cheeks.
Clearing her throat, she said, “I see. Well, I suppose I should reconsider
entering your bedroom in the future without an invitation.”

“Excellent idea,” Laura said, kissing her mother on the
cheek. “And I’m thinking I should do the same. Yes?”

A bit more color found its way to Eleanor’s face. “I hope you
don’t mind, but it was rather late when we finished last night, and I didn’t
see the need for him to travel at that hour.”

“Actually, I’m getting used to him being around, but it’s
still kinda weird knowing that you two are back together.”

“From where I’m standing, it’s kind of nice.”

Seeing her mother’s radiant smile, Laura said, “You really do
love him, don’t you?”

“With all my heart, Laura. With all my heart.”

***

After receiving a whispered suggestion from Eleanor that he
should bring back an overnight bag, Bill left just after breakfast to go to his
apartment for a quick shower and a change of clothes, and two hours later he
returned to a kitchen in shambles. Rolling up his sleeves, he began the task of
washing all the bowls and measuring cups that had been piled by the sink during
his absence, and amidst the sounds of laughter and the smell of vanilla, the
morning faded into afternoon.

Standing at the sink, he listened to the women talk as they
mixed and measured, and when expletives flowed from Toni’s mouth when she
forgot to use an oven mitt, he laughed heartily at her creative use of one
particular word. His mouth watered at the smell of Scottish shortbread slowly
baking in the oven, and his hand was slapped more than once when he tried to
steal a freshly baked chocolate chip cookie off a tray. And as he waited for
the next batter-covered bowl to be handed to him, Bill looked at the women in
the room and smiled. In all of his life, there weren’t many days burned into
his memory...actually, up until today, there had only been three.

On the day of their wedding, Mother Nature had done her best
to dampen the afternoon, but the spirits of a young man and woman on the
threshold of starting a life together could not be washed away by raindrops and
thunder. In a small church, atop a hill and surrounded by the greenery of the
country they loved, they spoke their vows in front of family and friends.
Wearing a Highland kilt, he had walked his bride, dressed in white, down an
aisle covered in rose petals, and after carrying her over the threshold of
their home that night, he made love to the woman who completed him…and created
the one who would fill his heart with pride.

Nine months later, in the wee hours of a Friday morning he
stood by a bed and marveled at the sight of his daughter. Swaddled in white
cotton, with chubby cheeks and bright eyes, she stole his heart with her first
coo. Tiny fisted hands reached up to him and when he held out a finger, and she
took hold, it was like no other feeling in the world. He never thought he could
feel humbled by just one touch, and he never thought it would happen again...but
he had been wrong.

***

“Be careful.”

“I’m fine.”

“If you fall, Eleanor will have my head.”

Smiling, Toni looked down at the ground. “If I fall, Eleanor
will be the least of your worries.”

“What do you mean?” Bill asked, shielding his eyes from the sun
as he looked up at the woman on the ladder.

“You’ve obviously never seen Laura’s temper.”

“Have you ever seen Ellie’s?” Bill asked.

“No, why?”

“Trust me, you don’t want to,” he said, snickering under his
breath. “You going to be okay if I go finish up the shrubs?”

“Yep, only have a few more clips to go and then this part
will be done. Go attack the hedges. I won’t be far behind you.”

Watching as Bill walked back to the front gardens, Toni
returned to the task at hand with a smile on her face. He no longer felt like a
stranger to her, and the anxieties that she had had the night before seemed to
have disappeared. She liked him. He had an easiness about him. A relaxing,
playful boyishness, and as they had covered the gardens in lights, she found
herself laughing more than once as he mumbled four-letter words at the amount
of decorations Eleanor had purchased. They chatted comfortably as they
assembled silhouettes of deer and angels, while making fun of the other’s
inability to put Tab A into Slot C. The day was bright and crisp, and as she
reached out to hook the next light into its clip, Toni breathed in the frosty
air and smiled again.

Standing with a tangle of netted lights in his hand, Bill
glanced in Toni’s direction, frowning as she once again overextended her reach.
It was something he had done more times than he could remember over the years,
so holding back his comments, he was about to cover more shrubbery when he saw
her slip. “Shit!” he said, tossing the lights aside as he bolted toward the ladder.

It took five long strides to get to her, but it seemed like
an eternity as he ran across the gravel, and with every step he took, Bill
prayed to God that he’d make it on time…and he did. Managing to wrap his arms
around Toni before she collided with the stone-covered drive, they both fell to
the ground with a thud. His back twinged at the impact, but he didn’t care.
Overcome with emotion at the near tragedy, he pulled her into a bear hug as he
silently thanked God for his swiftness.

“Get your bloody hands off me!” Toni growled, struggling like
a madwoman to get out of his arms. “
Let go of me
!”

For a split second, Bill didn’t understand her terror-filled
shrieks, but when Toni began kicking and punching to get away, he relaxed his
hold and watched in shock as she scrambled across the driveway. Stunned and
saddened, he didn’t know what to do. Like an animal ready to attack, Toni
remained crouched on the ground, glaring back at him as if daring him to move
and Bill’s heart broke at the expression on her face. She was
terrified…absolutely terrified.

Eleanor had told him that Toni had been abused in prison.
Over drinks and dinner, she had explained a few of Toni’s fears and quirks, but
it wasn’t until that moment when Bill realized the depths of the woman’s despair,
and tears sprang to his eyes. Unconsciously, he shook his head, trying to say
without words that she needn’t fear him. That he would never hurt her, but how
do you convince someone so frightened to trust?

Fearful that any sudden movement would cause more harm to the
tormented woman, Bill cautiously got to his feet. Never allowing his eyes to
leave hers, he prayed that she’d see the message they were sending.
Trust me. Please trust me. I won’t hurt you.

Enraged and ready to fight, Toni squatted on the ground with
hands fisted as her enemy slowly got up, and when he stood tall, she tensed,
preparing to strike out if he took one step closer. Trying to determine his
next move, she looked him in the eye and in an instant, Toni’s hellish
nightmare ended.

He looked so sad...so hurt...and when she saw the tears
rolling down Bill’s face, she felt gutted. Like a deflated balloon, Toni sagged
to her knees, embarrassed and ashamed. Finally able to hear the words of her
heart over the deafening sounds of her terror, her gaze clouded with tears as
the words kept repeating in her head.
He’s not one of
them. You can trust him. He’s not one of them. You can trust him.

Taking a ragged breath, she raised her eyes to meet his, and
listening to her heart, she reached out her hand to him, praying he would take
it…and he did.

Bill’s heart grew large as he took two quick steps, and
pulling Toni into his arms, they held each other close. They didn’t need words.
They didn’t need explanations or apologies as she buried her head in his
shoulder, and he buried his in hers.

He wasn’t her father, but in his arms, she felt safe. A dozen
men had given her a reason to fear, but this man had just given her a reason to
trust and she knew she would never fear him again.

She wasn’t his daughter, but the love he felt told him she
was. Their souls had touched amidst gravel and fear, and a bond had been formed
that would never be broken. He loved her. It was the simplest of truths, and he
would protect her until the day God took him away.

Neither had a choice…all they had were reasons.

***

“William!”

Shaken from his thoughts, he looked at the woman who had
called out his name. “Sorry, dear. What was that?”

“Where did you just go?” Eleanor asked, eyeing the man.

“Oh...um...just a bit of daydreaming. What did you need?”

“There are a few bags of tins in the office. Can you get them
for us so we can get these biscuits packed up? The ladies will be here soon.”

“Sure…sure,” he said, tossing the towel on the counter as he
walked out of the room. “Be right back.”

Eleanor returned to the trays of shortbread, but hearing
another “Shit!” fly from Toni’s mouth, she looked up. “You didn’t burn yourself
again, did you?”

“No,” Toni said, giving Laura a sideways glance. “Someone
keeps swatting my hand away from the biscuits.”

“That’s because if you don’t stop eating what we’re making,
we won’t have any left to pack up,” Laura said as she moved another baking
sheet out of Toni’s reach.

“It’s better than the way I used to be, isn’t it?”

Curious, Eleanor looked up from what she was doing. “Can I
ask what that means?”

“Oh...um...I had a few problems...um...actually...”

Seeing Toni struggle for the words, Laura spoke up. “Toni
used to ration what she ate. Something she had to do in prison, but she’s
getting better. It doesn’t happen that often anymore, and when it does, we work
through it.”

“Oh, I see,” Eleanor said quietly. “Well, then perhaps we
should make a few more batches so we have plenty. How’s that?”

“Works for me,” Bill chimed in as he returned to the kitchen
carrying a pile of tins. Placing them on the table, he added, “And my vote is
for more shortbread.”

“And who said you had a vote?” Eleanor asked with a twinkle
in her eye.

“Ouch.”

Enjoying the playful exchange, Toni glanced in Laura’s
direction and grinned when she saw the expression on Laura’s face. Although
adamant that she didn’t think of Bill as her father, the look in Laura’s eyes
said just the opposite. They were smiling and bright, and filled with the love
of a daughter for her father…whether she cared to admit it or not.

“I forgot about your sweet tooth,” Eleanor said, opening a
tin. “I’d best hide the chocolates, I’m thinking.”

“Just don’t hide them in the bedroom, unless you’ve forgotten
what I’m like on a sugar high,” Bill quipped, totally forgetting he was in
mixed company.

Having returned to her work, when the room grew silent, Toni
looked up and promptly bit her lip to stop herself from laughing. The faces of
the three members of the MacLeod family now glowed with a brilliant shade of
strawberry.