Graceful Ashes (23 page)

His mouth covered mine as the pad of his thumb wiped away the tears beneath my left eye. “God, I love you.” He spoke against my lips before slowing pulling from within me.

I winced.

“Sorry.” He grimaced.

“It’s fine, I’m fine just a bit sore.”

“Let me clean you up and I’ll show you just how much you mean to me.” He winked.

A chuckle rolled up my throat from his promise of what was to come. “I’d like that.” I swiped away the remainder of my tears.

“Oh, you’re going to do more that like it, you’ll
love
it.”

My laughter echoed through the apartment. Happiness was something I’d been searching for since I left New York. To be able to experience happiness, and more, once I’d returned wasn’t something I’d expected, but I was unbelievably grateful for finding it again.

Chapter Twenty Two

As I awoke I groaned at the soreness in my body from the night before. My cheeks warmed as images of being tangled in the sheets with Hendrix all night flooded my mind. I quietly slipped from the bed in an attempt not to wake him. After the long nights he’d been pulling to get the studio ready, the last thing I wanted to do was wake him.

When my eyes landed on the bright red numbers displaying the time from the nightstand, I silently cursed. All thoughts of not waking Hendrix went out the window as I frantically collected the majority of my clothes beside the bed. We hadn’t wasted any time when we pushed into his place and stripped our clothes the night before. A smile crept across my face at the thought and I ran smack dab into the corner of the dresser on my way to find my shirt and bra.

“Fuck.” I growled out in pain.

“Zoey?” Hendrix stirred awake.

“Yeah?” I replied through gritted teeth as I massaged the sore spot on my thigh.

His sleep filled eyes and messy bed head made me momentarily forget what I was doing until my phone buzzed to life in my hand. The sight of Rick’s name flashing across the screen returned me to my frenzied state. Without bothering to check the message, I crossed the room to where my shirt was crumpled on the floor.

“I’m gonna’ be late! I’ve never been late! That’s the number one rule, no one is allowed to be late or miss a practice without a helluva good reason!” I paused to inhale; my rambling had caused me to run out of air.

I slipped my shirt over my head and came face-to-face with a confused Hendrix.

“What the hell are you talking about?” he asked.

“Rehearsals!” I went to move past him but he gripped my biceps.

I squeezed my eyes shut to keep from melting into a pile of mushy love at the concerned look in his eyes. The frantic feeling pulsing through my veins reminded me of our first go around. I’d always given up classes to spend time with Hendrix. My discipline went out the window back then when it came to him, and I was terrified of the situation repeating itself.

“Did you hear me?”

Hendrix gave me a gentle shake that pulled me from my internal freak out session.

Slowly, I opened my eyes and looked into his. “No, I’m sorry. I don’t have time for this; I’m going to be late and probably get cut from the show.”

“I’m sure as shit not letting you leave freaking out like this. I know how that pretty little head of yours works.” Hendrix smoothed a hand through my hair. “What time does rehearsal start?”

I checked the time and groaned. “In twenty minutes.”

“Get dressed.” Hendrix handed me my skirt. “I’ll get you there on time.”

“There’s no way with traffic.”

Hendrix gave me a pointed stare. “Don’t second guess me, I’ll get you there.”

Without further argument, I slipped into my skirt while he dressed then followed him out the door.

“I can’t believe you kept the bike.” I pulled the helmet from my head and fingered the tangles from my hair.

“Honestly, I haven’t ridden it in at least a year.” Hendrix threw a leg over the bike then discarded his own helmet, and pulled me between his legs in an embrace.

Before I could say anything in return he pressed his lips against mine. A moan rolled up my throat as he flicked his tongue against my lips for entrance, which I granted. I’d already missed warm ups, if I didn’t pull the reins on the situation at hand I would miss rehearsal too.

“I pulled back to give us some space and sighed. “I’ve got to go.”

“I know,” he groaned. “I’ll pick you up.”

“I’d like that.” I bit my bottom lip. “Rehearsals should be over around four or a little after.”

“I’ll see you at four then.” Hendrix squeezed a handful of my backside before letting go.

“Thanks for the ride.” I called over my shoulder as I headed toward the building.

“Which one?” He laughed.

My face heated. “Both.” I blew him a kiss that he pretended to catch and press against his own lips.

A car door slamming caught my attention as I rushed up the steps to the back entrance. As my hand wrapped around the doorknob I caught sight of Rick. He didn’t look very happy, most likely because I was arriving after warm ups. Meaning I only had time for some quick stretching before rehearsals. But I wasn’t technically late since Rick was just arriving himself.

“Hey.” I tried to be polite and not sound as nervous as I felt.

“We need to talk.” His voice boomed as we slipped into the building.

“Okay…” I mumbled then headed for the area designated for warm ups.

“I mean now, Zoey.” Rick put a hand on my shoulder. “In my office, please.”

I closed my eyes for a brief moment and sighed. “Yeah, okay.”

The pit of my stomach rolled with nerves. I’d only been in Rick’s office once since I joined the production, and that was to fill out the employment paperwork. So whatever he wanted to speak with me about most likely wasn’t good.

I followed him into his office and he shut the door behind me, which was yet another first. Even when I’d filled out the paperwork, he hadn’t shut the door.

“Have a seat.” He motioned toward the two mid-back leather chairs sitting before his desk.

“I’m sorry for being late.”

Rick shook his head as he rounded the cherry wood desk and took a seat. “What’s going on with you?”

“What do you mean?”

“That guy that was all over you this morning.”

“Hendrix? What about him?”

“He’s the guy from your past that hurt you, isn’t he?”

“Is this really something we should be discussing right now?”

“It never stopped us before.” Rick crossed his arms over his chest.

He had a point. When we’d spoken about Hendrix before, I’d laid quite a bit of my past out on the table for him. But the way he was coming at me with his questions now had me on edge, like I needed to justify my personal life with Hendrix.

“Are you going to allow him to ruin your career here like he ruined Juilliard for you?”

I recoiled. “I’m here aren’t I?” I scoffed as I stood.

“Barely.”

“I believe this conversation is over.” I opened the door and paused. “Next time you call me in your office for a meeting, make sure it’s work related and not about my personal life.”

My mind was a jumbled mess of anger and nerves during rehearsals. But I was hell bent on hitting the routine perfectly, even if my body was screaming in soreness from my night with Hendrix. My thoughts bounced back and forth with the shit Rick had thrown at me in his office.

The entire time my mind kept going back to what Rick had said, even if I tried to not think about it. Regardless of why he acted the way he had, I sure as hell wasn’t going to brush his actions under the rug either. His words hurt, and were beyond the threshold of what your boss should talk to you about. Yes, we’d been straddling that line of being something more at one point, but we’d both kind of come to terms about it not being a good idea…or at least I thought we had.

I chugged a heaping amount of water during the break before the final scene then stepped onto the stage to wait for the others. I didn’t want to hang out backstage and endure small talk with Rick or anyone else. He’d pissed me off to the level I couldn’t fake being nice if need be, so I’d best keep my distance.

The echoing of the main doors to the auditorium opening caught my attention. Most likely the cleaning people. But a mega-watt smile spread across my face and obliterated my earlier annoyance when I saw who was walking up the aisle. “You’re early.”

“I’ll just sit and observe.” Hendrix grinned as he slipped into the middle third row and took a seat.

I exited the stage and slipped into the row in front of his and knelt in the before him. “You’re going to make me nervous,” I teased.

“I highly doubt that.” Hendrix pulled me closer so our lips could touch.

My eyes fluttered close as I enjoyed the feel of our lips connecting for a brief moment. I pulled back. “The last thing I need is for Rick to see us kissing right now.”

Hendrix eyebrows flattened. “Why would that matter? Did he say something to you this morning?” 

“Not exactly.” I smiled to deflect the agitation I’d heard in his voice. “Although I made rehearsal, I missed warm ups so I don’t want to add to any more reason for him to be upset.’ I leaned over and stole a kiss before taking my spot on the stage again.

The look of uncertainty that was etched across his face didn’t go unnoticed by me. I didn’t want Hendrix catching Rick off to the side and questioning him about what I’d said. If only I had kept my mouth shut, but the way my mind was working that wasn’t possible it seemed.

Everyone took their position so the last run through could get underway. Rick stepped out onto the stage, and as if he knew Hendrix was there his gaze went instantly to the third row where Hendrix sat. A beat of silence passed before he called out the count for the music to start and he faced us. I breathed easier with Rick’s back to Hendrix, and when I stole a glance at Hendrix I chanced a smile because his eyes weren’t on Rick, they were on me. But my pulse still raced from the elephant in the room.

We ran through the closing scene five times before Rick called it a night. Remarkably I’d managed to stay focused and had kept my eyes from drifting to Hendrix every few seconds. Whose presence alone I could feel, I didn’t need to look at him to know he was still there. Before I exited the stage, I held up my index finger to let Hendrix know it would be a few minutes to which he nodded with a loving grin settled in on his face.

Once I stepped through the curtain to the backstage area, I quickly gathered my duffle bag and slipped my coat and tennis shoes on. As I zipped my coat, arms snaked around my waist and I jumped. I spun ready to let whoever know that what they were doing wasn’t appropriate, or wanted.

“I didn’t mean to startle you.”

Hendrix’s broad smile eased my racing heart. “Hendrix.” I sighed. “You can’t be back here.” I slung my bag over my shoulder and dragged him toward the exit.

Hendrix firmly planted his feet and pulled me to a stop. “Rick told me I could come back here.”

“He did?” I’m sure my jaw went slack.

“Yes…” Hendrix drawled out.

“Oh, well…okay.” I didn’t know what to say to that, especially after Rick’s discussion with me in his office.

Hendrix took my hands in his. “Watching you was unbelievable. I can’t even put into words how talented and graceful you are on that stage. I know I’ve apologized a hundred times already for the past, but I’m going to make it a hundred and one.”

A giggle rolled up my throat.

“I should’ve seen what was going on with us back then. I was too stuck on getting high to realize how badly I was dragging you down the rabbit hole. You losing your scholarship to Juilliard’s on me, not you. If I’d opened my eyes and took in just how much it meant to you, I would’ve never stepped into your life.”

“Don’t say that.”

Hendrix held up his hand “Just hear me out.” A smile pulled at his lips.

I nodded.

“Ever since I lost my parents, I thought my dreams and aspiration were meaningless. I lost all hope. Yeah, I was left with a small inheritance, but I blew every last dime of it getting high. Once that money ran out I turned to pushing drugs.”

My heart ached for Hendrix. He’d given up when he lost his parents. I understood how easily that could happen. I might’ve been a small child when I lost my parents, but I’d still been affected
me
to the point of not trying in school. That is until Talon pushed me into dance classes, and from there on out I fell in love with dance. My passion grew and I knew deep down in my heart and soul that dancing was my way of coping with the heartache of no longer having the family I’d known for those short years. Kind of like Hendrix turning to his art.

“That day I saw you in the hall of your building coughing up a storm from walking through a smoke cloud, it was like the haze of my life lifted. I was selfish with you.” Hendrix slipped his hand around my waist to pull me closer. “If I hadn’t been so damn selfish, your life could’ve ended up so differently than it has.”