Heaven in Hedonism (The Sinful Series Book 3) (9 page)

Soon we were in the Town Car headed to the resort. “I see you booked us on the nude side,” Mac mentioned.

“Oh, is that a problem?” Guilt hit me. When I booked this, I planned to make him as uncomfortable as possible. This entire trip was designed to make him squirm. Here he was looking out for my every comfort. I was shit.

“No, I just wanted to make sure that it was intentional.” He shrugged.

Smiling some, I said, “Yeah. There won’t be one place that the sun doesn’t hit us.” Then I winked.

“Heaven,” he whispered, as he kissed the top of my head.

It seemed like I was really starting to master this relaxing thing when we pulled into Hedonism II. From first glance, it was pretty much what I expected, a pretty façade hiding a naughty interior. The lobby was packed with couples arriving. There were signs about the activities for the week, but mostly bodies blocked them. So we walked to the line and waited for our turn.

Happy pairs of varying genders, all of which seemed so in love, surrounded us. It made me feel really out of place. Mac snaked an arm around my waist again and the feelings subsided. When it was our turn, we were greeted differently than the other couples.

“Ah, we’ve been waiting for you!” the woman at reception exclaimed.

“You have?” Mac questioned.

Nodding, she explained, “Yes, we had some scheduling issues last minute.”

I swallowed hard. Somehow, I knew all of this was too good to be true. So much for a relaxing week. We were probably about to be transferred to some other resort.

“So, given the nature of the week, we have had a ton of reservations,” she began.

Part of me wanted to question what she meant by ‘nature of the week, but I mostly just wanted to get to the bottom of this. “So where are you sticking us?” I asked abruptly.

Laughing, she immediately understood. “No, you’re staying here, but we were hoping you two would agree to share a room instead of maintaining separate rooms. We will completely understand if you refuse, but if you agree, we’d like to refund you the money for the second room, and offer you a complimentary week to be used at your discretion.”

Mac and I looked at each other. I blinked a few times. He spoke first. “Could we use the second week right after this one, rather than fly home and come back?”

It was a great question. I leaned on the counter while awaiting her response. She was scanning through the computer, checking the availability. I was just about to start tapping my fingers nervously when she looked up.

“Actually, yes. We can even keep you in the same suite.” She smiled brightly at us.

Mac and I exchanged looks. I wasn’t sure that was enough. My mind was racing. “What do you think?” he asked calmly.

“I’ll have to ask my boss if I can take an extra week off.” I teased.

“Consider your request approved,” he joked. Turning to the woman at the counter, he smiled and said, “Let’s do it.”

“Great! Now the paperwork. I trust you brought your birth certificates?” She started typing on the computer while we pulled out and passed her our passports and birth certificates. After reaching for them, she started typing away again. “Okay, now I’ll need signatures. Lots of them.”

We each found pens in our bags. “It’s official,” Mac said happily.

“Not yet. There’s a week of classes first, then the ceremony and you can expect to receive your certificates in the mail in about four to six weeks,” she noted.

I was confused, standing there with my pen poised, ready to sign my life away for a week of relaxation. “Classes?”

“Yup,” she began, “tantric sex.”

We looked at each other, eyes wide. It had never occurred to me we might have to interact. I supposed we could just skip them, but at the same time, this might just be the answer to my worries. These classes could be what helped me overcome my fears. Mac seemed to be awaiting my reaction. “Let’s do it,” I said with a shrug.

“Sign here for the room,” she said, pointing. “We’ll need a credit card for incidental expenses, like spa treatments or watercraft rental.”

Mac pulled out his card and passed it over the counter to her. Though I wanted to protest, I remembered what he’d told me. Instead, I breathed deeply and tried to let him be the man, a real man. It wasn’t a stretch. He was very manly. For me, it was about letting go and learning to trust. He knew this as he hugged me close.

“Okay, now sign here for the certificate,” she said.

I watched as Mac signed above his typed name and then I signed above mine. It was simple. Tantric sex was the theme of the week. “Hey, what’s next week’s theme?” I wondered.

“Oh, it’s just a regular week with theme nights. It will be the perfect honeymoon,” she assured us.

We exchanged confused looks, then took our room key, resort map, and the itinerary before heading to our suite. We hadn’t taken five steps before she called out to us.

“The first class starts at four this afternoon! Have fun!”

We smiled at each other. Somehow I knew what he was about to say. It had fast become our motto for the trip. Laughing and in unison, we said, “Let’s do this!”

As we headed to our suite Mac turned to me. “This place is beautiful. I’m so glad you suggested this.”

Just then, a naked woman carrying a towel passed us on her way to the beach. Without being too obvious, I studied his reaction. Huh. He didn’t even look. I did, but he seemed oblivious. Was it possible to like him even more because of that? “Yeah, me too,” I agreed.

“What do you want to do after we drop our luggage in the suite?” His eyes sparkled with excitement.

“Hmm, I wanted a shower, but I think I could be just as happy with a couple of hours of pool time.” The sky was completely cloudless and a gorgeous blue. The idea of relaxing by a pool and soaking in some rays really appealed to me.

“Prude or nude?” he asked, even though I was sure he already knew the answer.

“Nude,” I said matter-of-factly. “I don’t plan on going back with any tan lines.”

“Is that so?”

Nodding, I turned my attention to the door to our room. We had arrived at our destination. While I had seen pictures on the laptop, I was hoping they didn’t over promise what we’d actually be experiencing. On the contrary, once I opened the door, I was pleasantly surprised with the feel of the room.

The room had a nice airy feel to it, in part because we had the curtains open to the patio with our private Jacuzzi. The room was mostly white with white tile floors, but there were plenty splashes of color that made it comfortable. We had a television that would probably never be turned on, I hoped. There was a fridge and our own premium liquor. Mac moved our suitcases in and set them on the king sized bed while we looked around. The first anomaly we noticed was the mirror on the ceiling.

“Huh,” he commented, yet the look on his face suggested he knew precisely what that was for.

Then I glanced over and saw that the bathroom was glass enclosed. Not only were we sharing a room, but there was not one bit of privacy to be had in it. Fuck. Just fuck. I looked at him to see if he noticed. Whether he had or not, he clearly had observed my reaction.

“Listen, I’ll do everything I can to make you comfortable. We have a king sized bed. We don’t even have to touch if you don’t want to. And I can go outside while you shower or something. I’ll make sure this isn’t awkward at all. Promise.” Then he raised his hands like a boy scout.

“Do they even have boy scouts in the UK?” I asked with a laugh. His efforts had not gone unnoticed.

“So, I was never a boy scout. I’d venture to guess you weren’t either, but I trust your word.” He threw his hands up in the air, clearly dismayed. “What have I ever done to earn your mistrust?”

“You’re male,” I mumbled before walking out the patio doors. Already I needed space. Being in that room together was great in theory, but now it felt claustrophobic. I took several deep breaths in my effort to hold it together. By the time I had walked back into the room, Mac had put our toiletry bags in the bathroom and stacked our suitcases in the closet with mine on top. So much consideration. Why did he have to be so awesome?

“I was just about to get undressed for the pool. Let’s get some color on my pasty white ass,” he joked, turning around and playfully mooning me.

The minute he pulled his pants and boxers off, I clapped a hand over my mouth. I didn’t know a lot about guys, but this one clearly knew little about manscaping. “Are you going out like that?” I asked, eyes wide in surprise.

“I don’t know what you mean,” he said innocently.

There was no other way to start this conversation off than to show him. Slowly, I disrobed while he watched, a safe distance away. He studied me, but his penis didn’t grow at all. Great, maybe he wasn’t attracted to me in the least. When I pulled down my panties, he stared with an analytical look on his face. My pussy was completely hairless.

He looked at his groin, then over to me. “So, you are suggesting that I might want to trim it back a bit?”

“Well, I’m thinking that we’re here and going to be involved with tantric sex workshops. I’d like to neaten up my workspace.” I explained with a smile.

Without saying a word, Mac walked into the bathroom, grabbed a towel, hunted through his bag and returned with a shaving kit. He spread the towel on the bed and sat down on it, his feet touching the floor. Then he passed me the kit. “I trust you,” he said simply before lying back on the bed.

There I was, holding a bag and staring at his junk, knowing I had no one to blame but myself. “You sure?” I asked. Never had I been one to back down from a challenge, but this was a huge one. Shave a man. Shave without cutting him. Touch his penis and ball sack. I had never done any of it.

Mac folded his hands behind his head. “Yeah. I’m sure.”

Sitting on the bed beside him, I opened the bag to see what he had in there. To my surprise, he had a battery operated trimmer. We were definitely going to start there. I started by using a guard to cut it all back. When I turned the power button to the ‘on’ position, we both jumped. It made me giggle, which helped. “Last chance to change your mind,” I warned.

“Let’s do it.”

Rolling my eyes, I started from the top and worked my way down. I tried to keep it professional. My sexuality was no secret. He knew I hadn’t exactly touched a lot of cocks before. Placing my hand over his business, I held it down so I could shave the coarse dark hair above, then I moved it from side to side as I needed to. Periodically, I would stop to collect large clumps of hair and pile them on the edge of the towel. As I worked, I could sense him watching me. Overall, I thought it was going rather well.

I had spread his thighs, partially so I could get closer, but also because it seemed so natural that I should be there. It just made sense. Slowly, with him just letting me be, allowing me to explore, I did. It wasn’t just about shaving anymore. I was demystifying the penis. How far should I go?

“Um,” I mumbled as I tried to figure out how to get the stray hairs off his balls. The trimmer was hot to the touch from use.

Holding out a disposable razor, he said simply, “Here.” Then he went one step further and pulled on the sack. “It doesn’t hurt to tug on it. Sometimes, it feels rather good actually.” He smiled. “Just don’t knick me or I’ll bleed like the proverbial stuck pig. M’kay?” He winked.

“Gah. No pressure.” So I did as he showed me, continued until he was as bare as the day he was born. When I had finished, I brushed him off. It was the first time he responded to me. I saw his penis lengthen and harden some, which was why I did it a little more. Honestly, I was fascinated. More than that, I felt safe.

Mac’s eyes were closed. “You’ve never done this before, have you?” he asked gently.

Caught and self-conscious, I stopped what I was doing and looked at his face. He was watching me now. Part of me wanted to tell him, but really, I wasn’t ready. It was a big thing to share with someone. If those amazing eyes of his ever looked at me with pity, I’d die. Inside, a piece of me would just shatter. All I could do was shake my head. Let’s face it, there was no foreplay the night of the rape. There was no getting to know each other. It was every bit the wham bam thank you ma’am experience.

“You can explore all you want and I won’t stop you, Jolie,” he said quietly. “Of course, if you want to learn, want to know what I like, then I can help with that too.”

“Pool,” I managed. My face was flushed, I felt like I was burning up inside and as nice as he was, I was still fearful.

Bouncing off the bed, if he was disappointed he hid it well. “Yup. Let’s go to the pool. We have all the time in the world. No need to rush anything.”

Shaking, I grabbed his toiletries and brought them back to the bathroom. He had picked up the towel and shook it off into the garbage can. Silently, I walked to the closet to pull out my beach towel from my suitcase. Mac followed me and did the same. We headed to the patio door, which led to both the pool and the beach. Just as I was about to open the door, he stopped me with a tender hand on my shoulder. When I turned to look, he said softly, “Best shave ever, love.” Then he kissed me on the temple.

It was a nice kiss and I could get really used to them, but suddenly for the first time, I wanted more. I wanted his lips on mine. I had to know. Grabbing his neck, I pulled his face close to mine. Ever so slowly, I turned my face upward and angled it until our lips touched. It was something I had done often with other females, but only the one time with a guy. And he perverted it and turned it into something ugly. Our lips met, matched up, aligned perfectly. There was a transfer of warmth. His lips were soft and sweet. I gave his bottom lip a gentle nip. Then I drew back. “Anytime, Mac,” I murmured before we headed out the door.

“So, what do you think this workshop is going to be like?” Mac asked as he swam in the pool.

There were several couples, lounging around, but we had almost an unspoken agreement to just spend some time alone. “I’m not sure. I know nothing about tantric sex. I’m sure you’re shocked,” I joked.

Studying me for a moment, he finally broke down and told me what he thought. “Honestly, I rather imagine you haven’t had many sexual experiences. I don’t even think you’ve had a lot of relationships. You strike me as someone who has a hard time letting anyone get close.” After letting loose, he waited and watched for my reaction.

“Since we’re being honest,” I teased, “you’re right.” I shrugged. “I had Sin. I didn’t need much else. We were pretty inseparable. I liked it that way.” Swimming to the steps, I walked up to my lounger. The couples were staring at me. Sin would have told me it was because I looked like a model. She was always great at helping me with my confidence. “Coming?” I asked as I paused beside the pool.

“Sure,” Mac said. He followed me out of the pool and joined me at our seats. “It’s no wonder,” he muttered.

“What’s no wonder?” I asked confused.

“You draw so much attention, that it’s no wonder you had few relationships. It would take a really confident person to be with you.” He frowned. “I used to think I was confident. I guess we’ll see.”

Ignoring him, I realized we had only thirty minutes before our first workshop. “We should go,” I suggested. “Time to get ready.”

Throwing an arm around my toweled body, he said, “Can’t wait.”

I think he meant it too.

We walked back to the room to consult the itinerary. Along with the classes and time schedule, it would also warn us if we needed to bring anything special and tell us what to wear. Once we consulted the paper, it warned we should dress comfortably. Looking at Mac, I questioned, “What does that mean to you?”

“Huh. I’m thinking loose fitting clothes.” He smiled.

Smirking, I said, “I think it means that you don’t want me to be in anything tight or provocative. You realize I just was completely naked at the pool?”

Nodding, he admitted, “I sure did. So did everyone there. You are by far the most beautiful woman at this resort. I’m just trying to protect you.”

“Protect me…keep me all to yourself,” I mumbled as I walked into the bathroom. Turning slightly, I shot a smile over my shoulder before I committed to getting ready. Sin’s teachings worked. He was watching.

A few minutes before four in the afternoon, we were walking into our first class. I was a bit nervous, but tried desperately not to show it. The room was packed with about fifteen other couples. It was a lot of bodies in one space. We were all directed to pick up mats as we walked in the big open-air room.

The instructor, Marni, started class by explaining the concept of tantric sex and giving us an overview of the week. “I know you are all eager to get to the ceremony on Sunday,” she noted. As I watched, most of the couples around the room hugged each other tightly, squeezed hands.

Leaning closer to Mac’s ear, I whispered, “Damn, these people are serious about their certificates.”

Chuckling, he agreed, “I know, right?”

“Tantric sex is about connecting with one another on a deeper level. What does this mean to you? It’s about years of a fulfilling relationship, both sexually and emotionally.” Marni smiled warmly. “Couples who practice tantric sex are more likely to be satisfied and stay together.”

Mac and I exchanged looks. Stay together? We weren’t even close to being there yet. Still, we smiled. It was rather contagious.

“I’m going to warn you,” Marni continued. “If you thought you were coming here and have a ton of sex, I’m going to discourage that for this week, but after Sunday it will be game on.”

Breathing a sigh of relief, I couldn’t help but think I liked this woman more and more. I wasn’t ready to share my body yet. The idea of having his penis in me was still daunting. But maybe, just maybe after a week of this, I could imagine and be ready for more. I’d have to be if I ever wanted a baby. And maybe with a connection, I could even ask Mac if he’d be willing to father that baby.

“Let’s begin with breathing and meditation exercises,” Marni said.

Soon she had us sitting side by side on the mat, legs crossed, hands on our knees palm side up, eye closed. There was music playing softly and some incense was burning. I hated incense. And yet in this scenario, it worked. So we sat quietly and let our minds drift, practiced relaxing. I didn’t think I could do it. While I was inclined to spend hours working quietly in front of a computer screen, I was practically incapable of shutting my mind down and just breathing and being.