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Authors: Alexis Noelle

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BOOK: Heinous
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Chapter Six

Nikki

 

 

I groan as I roll to my side. My body feels completely torn, half of it aching in pain and the other completely sated. I’ve never had a man do those things to me and not attempted to castrate him after. When his hand smacked my ass, it sent shockwaves of pain and pleasure throughout my entire body; it was like a wave reverberating through me. The way he took control of me and dominated was something I never thought I wanted. In that moment I didn’t need to think. He was in control. He was leading me. I could just exist and not worry.

You, my little firecracker, whether you want to accept it or not, will be mine. I will have you and you will fucking love it.

His. Chills run through me as even the thought of that word comes into my mind. I don’t know what I was thinking ever agreeing to it.
You weren’t thinking with your damn brain.
I can’t be his. It isn’t possible. What I did the night we first met was only a temporary fix for my problem. It will catch up to me and then I’ll be gone and he will never find me. He can’t. If he did it would be bad for everyone. Despite knowing that this has disaster written all over it, I find myself craving what he can give to me. If anyone found out what I did that night just to be able to be free for a couple more months, I would probably be dead.

Snitches end up in ditches.

The phrase replays in my head again and again.

My body wants to go to him. To find him and seek comfort for the demons he doesn’t know haunt me. How can I let myself get attached to him just to be crushed when I’m ripped from him in less than two months? Is the prize worth the pain? I could walk away; enjoy the little freedom I have until D-day comes. Or I could stay; be with him, be happy. Then when the time comes, I could be destroyed. Either way it’s coming and either way when it does, my life is over. Everything I have ever wanted for myself, any kind of happiness I gain before then, any relationship I form, they will all disappear.

I look at the bedroom door, knowing he is down the hallway only a few steps from me. Call me a glutton for punishment, I’m choosing to enjoy these next few weeks. I’m going to make the most out of them.

Seeing a t-shirt of his thrown on his dresser, I slip it on over my head, letting it fall to almost mid-thigh. I open a few drawers before I find a pair of sweatpants and slip them on my goose bump covered legs. I open the door, hearing the low sounds of the TV. When I walk into the living room he is sitting on the couch with his laptop open on the table in front of him. He must hear me because he turns my way.

Before I can say anything, the door swings open and a petite blonde girl comes storming in. “Cameron Pearce! I will not be ignored by you!” She stops in her tracks when she sees me.

Cameron?

I look over at Twisted who is now sitting on the couch, his head in his hands. Who is this chick? “You know, Lizzie, you could at least knock.”

Lizzie, I think he said that was his sister’s name. “Yeah, and you could answer your phone, then I wouldn’t have to come down here.” She takes a couple steps toward me. “I’m Lizzie, Cam’s sister.”

I look over at him and laugh a bit. “Hi, I’m Nikki.”

He stands, walking over to us, giving her a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek. “Liz, what did I tell you? No one calls me that but you, not even Jesse.”

“Sorry, big brother, it’s your name.” She shrugs her shoulders and I laugh again. He smacks my ass hard as she turns her back to walk to the couch. I wince, given that it’s still sore from earlier.

“You’ll pay for that,” I whisper to him.

“I’m counting on it.” He winks at me before taking my hand and bringing me over to the couch. We sit down next to each other and Lizzie’s eyes zero in on our joined hands. “So what’s up, sis?”

“I need to book your ticket for the wedding, and can I just say that now I’m super excited to be booking you two tickets!” Her voice escalates throughout the sentence and she claps at the end of it. I can’t help but think how much they are polar opposites. And what the hell does she mean, two tickets?

“I already told you that I’ll come for this crazy ass week thing.” He shakes his head, then turns to me. “Lizzie is getting married in Jamaica in three weeks.” Wow. That’s awesome. Wait, did she mean a second ticket for me? Oh, hell no. He must be reading the realization on my face. “And yes, she has been bugging me about bringing someone, so she just assumed that you’re coming. Which I am completely on board for; at least you can keep me somewhat sane.”

“No, I can’t.”

He looks at me in confusion. “Why not?”

Because I’m already trying not to get too close to you.

“It will be so much fun, Nikki. The hotel is all inclusive and our families are covering everything else.” I look over at her. Her eyes are pleading with me.

This is too dangerous. Getting close with him is one thing. Immersing myself in his life is a whole other. If this were a normal relationship maybe. If I knew there wasn’t a deadline on when he would be taken from me, then I wouldn’t hold back.

“She’ll be there, sis.” I freeze and tense next to him. I won’t argue with him in front of his sister but there is no way I can do this.

“Oh my God! I can’t wait! I swear I thought you’d be alone forever.” She laughs as she gets up to hug him. Except she doesn’t go to him, she comes straight at me. Her hands wrap around me. “Welcome to the family!”

My eyes start to fill with tears but I quickly blink a few times.

Get a damn hold of yourself.

“Thanks,” I say as I relax back into the couch. Lizzie hangs out for a half hour or so but it’s a blur to me, I can’t focus.

I lost my only family with my mom.

My father isn’t family, at least by nothing other than blood.

As she said that to me, it hurt because I know that even though I’m not attached to these people yet, I’m stupid enough to let myself get attached.

Then I’ll lose them too.

When Lizzie leaves, I give her a hug and she tells me she’ll see me soon. Twisted turns to me after he shuts the door. “You good? I know she can be a lot to take.”

“No, she’s great. You guys are lucky to have each other.” I rub my arms as nerves wrack my body. “I can’t go away with you.”

His eyes study me silently for a minute. “Why?”

“I just can’t. We barely even know each other.” I turn away from him.

“Don’t give me that bullshit. You want to keep shit to yourself that’s one thing, but don’t fucking lie to me. I won’t take it.” His voice is hard and angry. “I can tell you have shit in your past that you need to work through and I’m willing to let you do it but you ain’t gonna stand there and lie to me.”

I don’t face him, I can’t.

His hands wrap around me from behind. His mouth is next to my ear. “I told you earlier that you were mine and I meant it. I want you. I’ll give you the time you need. When you are ready to tell me shit you can, but I won’t take you lying to me. In three weeks I’m gonna take your gorgeous ass away with me. Whatever you’re worried about, let it go. I can protect you from whatever it is you’re running from whenever you’re ready to let me in.”

I turn in his arms.

If only his words were true.

I would tell him everything right now.

He can’t save me.

No one can.

 

Chapter Seven

Twisted

 

 

I look around at the table of my brothers. We have been trying to hash shit out for what feels like hours. Deathstalkers has gotten involved in an underground fighting ring. It has brought a lot of money into the club, but a lot of headaches at the same time. We constantly need to make sure we are moving the location around, and keeping the cops off of us. Pres was pissed when I got arrested with Nikki because he knows they are trying to find any reason they can to pin shit on us.

The cops have always been like that though, no matter what was going on. They hate our very existence and if they can get us on anything, even a goddamn jaywalking ticket, they’ll fucking do it. It’s pathetic. Meanwhile, their stupid asses have dozens of unsolved cases building up on their desks. Asshats.

Shooter bangs the gavel next to me. “Alright, we got any more business?” He glances around the table. “Good, make sure to cover your asses and stay out of trouble.” His eyes dance over at me.

Everyone starts to file out of the room. “You good, brother?”

I look over at the man who just a few months ago chose me as his right hand. “Yeah. Why?”

“Because I’ve known you for years and I ain’t never seen you look twice at a woman, much less let yourself get caught by the cops with one. Don’t let this girl fuck with your head.” His eyes are fixed on mine.

“I’m good.” I clap him on the back before walking out of the room.

I sit down at the bar, motioning to the prospect to slide me down a beer. My thoughts go to Nikki. She’s hiding something from me. She tries to hide it with her smart mouth and cocky attitude, but I can see past all of her bullshit. It pisses me off. I slam the bottle down as my phone vibrates in my pocket.

Jesse: You around?

Me: Yeah, you in town?

Jesse: Would I be asking if I wasn’t, shithead? Meet me for lunch at the diner?

Me: On my way.

I walk out of the clubhouse and climb onto my bike. My brother is rarely in town so whenever he is, I always make time for him. He is an MMA fighter and as much as I can’t watch the shit, I’m proud of him. Coming from where we did, the kid really made something of himself. The fact that any of us are functioning adults is a goddamn miracle, but him and Lizzie really did good. For me, I knew I would never have anything like they do. The MC for me is perfect. It’s a sense of freedom while still giving me a chance to be something.

I pull up to the diner, shaking my head as I see Jesse’s fancy ass car sticking out like a sore thumb. Walking in, I find him at a back table, his tell tale baseball hat pulled low. “You know, for someone trying to keep a low profile, you might wanna invest in a car that doesn’t scream ‘I’m a douchebag.’”

He looks up, giving me the finger. “Don’t be jealous, brother.”

“Not jealous. If I wanted to look like a tool I’d just copy your haircut.” I sit down as the waitress comes over. We come here all the time, so neither of us needs to look at the menu. We order and the desperate for attention waitress lingers, even after both of us are done talking. She finally snaps out of it, then blushes before walking away. “How long you in town for?”

“Just a of couple days. I have a fight next week so Coach is gonna crack down on my ass hard. Lizzie has been yapping my damn ear off about your girl. What’s going on with that?” He looks over at me.

Jesus, not him too. “What do you mean? The two of you act like I’m a damn monk and I’ve never been with a woman before.”

“Didn’t say that. I’m just saying a woman has never been in your bed, much less made a second appearance before. Aren’t you famous for throwing around your whole, ‘I’m like Baskin Robbins, I want thirty-one flavors on a daily basis’ line? Now you have some chick at your apartment, and you’re bringing her with you to Lizzie’s wedding.” Jesse leans back in the chair.

My brother knows me well enough that I can’t lie to him. “I don’t know, Jess. This chick is out of her goddamn mind and I fucking love it. The first night I met her she was mouthing off to some big ass biker, insinuating he had sex with his cousins and shit.”

He chokes on the drink he’s taking.

“Yeah. That’s not even the half of it. We got arrested that night for trespassing on this beach after hours. She was mouthing off to this young cop the whole time. I think she might have scared the kid.” I shake my head, remembering his face when she asked him if he was a virgin.

“She sounds like the female version of you.” The waitress drops off our food, this time quickly retreating once the plates hit the table. “So, what are you saying? You like this girl?”

I look at my younger brother. “I want to claim her.”

His eyes go wide. “Like official MC claim her?” I nod. “And you’re still acting like you don’t know if you want her?” A shrug is my only response. My head is all over the damn place. “Well, let me ask you this. Say you looked outside and saw her with some other guy. You good with that?” My fist tightens around the burger in my hand, causing the contents to fall onto the plate. “I’m judging by the fact that your burger is now crushed into tiny pieces, that the answer to that is no.” He laughs. “What’s the big deal with admitting that you have a thing for her?”

“The big deal, Jess, is that I don’t need to bring anyone into the shit that is my life. This girl interests me, yes. Whether you and Lizzie want to accept it, I’m not the two of you. You and I might have lived through the same shit but we took two different paths in dealing with it.” Jesse took what happened to us and channeled it into something positive.

For me, it's a trigger.

It’s a ticking time bomb.

“Whatever you say.”

We finish the rest of lunch without talking about Nikki, thankfully. Jesse tells me about the fight he has coming up and tries to convince me to come see it. My brother has been fighting for two years and I’ve never seen him once, not even on TV. It’s too personal. It brings back too many demons.

We say our goodbyes and before I pull out of the parking lot, I send Nikki a text letting her know I want to see her tonight.

She’s been avoiding me the past two days. I think meeting Lizzie scared her off. I need a fix though. She’s like a drug for me. Too long without her and my body starts to crave her.

 

BOOK: Heinous
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