Human Conditioning (21 page)

When she heard the beginnings
of her parents’ drunken love-making in the next room, her thoughts drifted to
Adam. After today, she would never tell Aiden that she and Adam were serious.
He had destroyed all her trust in him now. In fact, she was determined not
to trust Aiden with any of her thoughts, feelings, fears or pleasures ever
again. Their relationship was destroyed as far as she was concerned. 

She touched her cheek and felt
a surge of anger welling up inside of her. She was tired of being treated like
a kid! She was a young adult, a
woman
. Adam had seen to that. Losing her
virginity to him had changed their relationship: they were closer; they had a connection.
Adam was slowly turning into the love of her life, and she could only hope he
felt the same way about her. She wanted Adam with her now. To have him there would
make the memory of earlier bearable. He would cuddle up to her and tell her
everything she needed to hear. He was a calming influence over her and, one day,
she would offload all of her life’s worries onto him and he would ensure that
things got better for her. 

As she listened to the
sluggish thudding of her parents’ love-making, she analysed her very first
experience of intercourse. It had been painful and she had not been aroused to
orgasm, but that didn’t matter, because she had felt something even more
special. She had, at last, felt like a woman.

Laughable as it was, Duggie was furious when he had seen
Kate’s cheek the next morning and Kate now relished in his concern. “Who did
this to you?”

“Aiden.”

“That little cunt!” Duggie
growled.

“Why?” Vivien intervened, all
wide-eyed and fretful.

Kate basked in their affection.
Her parents were united in their anger over her plight, fussing over her. She was
in her element, until Aiden walked in the door. He took in the scene before him
with wariness initially, then he felt a rising anger as he processed what must
be going on. Kate was between their mother and father; their mother grasping her
arm, Duggie with an arm around Kate’s shoulders, looking like the ever-concerned
parents that they were
not.

Vivien spoke first, not to
Aiden’s surprise. “How
dare
you raise your hand to your sister!”

Aiden glared at Kate and, all
of sudden, she found herself enjoying her parents’ affections no longer. She
stared back at her brother and gulped, opened her mouth to speak, then shied
away at the last moment.

“What’d you hit her for?” Duggie
demanded.

He was enjoying the commotion;
any chance to form an attack on his son. Aiden was totally aware that both his
mother and father were using their daughter’s grief as the day’s entertainment.
He looked from father to mother, knowing that they didn’t really give a toss,
and the knowledge made him sick to the stomach. He actually felt sorry for the
little grass that was his sister. She honestly believed this little act was for
her benefit, but he knew it was really for theirs: an excuse to fight with
him
.
He bet they had lit up inside when Kate had revealed that he was the one who
had struck her.

Aiden shook his head slowly.
First, he would teach his little sister a thing or two about the consequences
of grassing. He replied, “Kate was taking acid with that twat Curtis Mahar.” He
paused and, cocking his head to one side, he smirked, staring directly at Kate
as if to say ‘fuck you’. “I straightened her out then I straightened him out.”
Vivien pursed her lips and Duggie’s mouth tightened into a hard line. Aiden
went on, “And as for your parents’ concern, Kate... they don’t give a flying
fuck what has happened to you. It’s just an excuse to kick off at me.”

Vivien’s mouth dropped open.
She had been caught out and she didn’t really know what to say. Duggie,
however, flared up. Grabbing Kate’s arm, he swung her round to face him and
struck her across her swollen cheek. “You stupid little cow!” he bellowed. Kate
cried out hysterically and all hell broke loose.

Duggie pushed her away and he
and Aiden all of a sudden lunged at each other, gripping onto one another’s
clothes and dragging each other to the floor. Father and son rolled around the
carpet, laying into each other with all their might. Vivien was shouting
alongside a hysterical Kate as both men slammed and crashed, threw and barged each
other around the small room. Aiden managed to pull himself free first, and
getting to his feet, he began landing hard blows to Duggie’s ribs with his feet.
Vivien cried out, but it was of no use. Aiden had seen red and he was in for
the kill.

Duggie shielded his face from
Aiden’s blows as he used the couch behind him to pull himself up. He managed to
throw himself onto the couch as Aiden kicked him about as if he were kicking a
football against a wall. With sheer determination, Duggie found his footing and
bounced up into a standing position, forcing Aiden backwards.

Fists up, ready, he limped on
his good leg, waiting for his son’s next assault. He breathed heavily, watching
him warily and trying to predict his next move. Aiden’s fists went up, and he
too breathed deeply, surveying his father, both suddenly looking as though they
were in the ring together.

“I bet you wished Grant hadn’t
taken the time to train me up now, eh,
Duggie
?” Aiden goaded, wiping the
blood and sweat from beneath his nose.

“That’s enough!” Vivien shrieked.

She was ignored, as she knew
she would be. “You haven’t been in a ring for three years,” Duggie retorted
breathlessly.

“And you,
Duggie
,
haven’t been in the ring for fifteen years, so let’s see who remembers their
training the most.”

“Aiden, Dad, stop this,
please
!”
Kate begged, tears streaming down her face, her hands shaking violently as she
attempted to wipe them away.

Vivien reiterated her
daughter’s plea but, again, she was ignored. Yet her screams could be heard
distinctly as Aiden landed the first punch, spawning the beginnings of the brutal
fight that was to be the motive for her son’s permanent departure from 22
Carlton House.

“I’m out of here! I can’t live
like this anymore!” Aiden bellowed at his mother, tears threatening to invade
his bloodshot eyes.

His nose was streaming with
blood, both eyes swollen, cut and bruised. His knuckles were red-raw and
bleeding, and his ribs screamed with pain. Kate was whimpering in the corner of
the room. Vivien was wide-eyed, still utterly shocked by the events of the
morning. Once again, she was backed against a wall: imprisoned between the
members of her family, confused and frightened, not knowing what to do or who
to console first.

Duggie had stormed out. He
hadn’t emerged from the fight unscathed, and Vivien was sure that she would
bear the brunt of his temper when he returned home later, inebriated and
tremendously pissed off.

“Aiden, I...” Vivien shook her
head. She was honestly lost for words. She could say that her boy deserved all
that he got, but even she had to admit that, today, a line had been crossed.

Aiden stormed out of the room
and up the stairs. Flying into his bedroom, he pulled out his old kit bag from
under the bed and, wrenching open his chest of drawers, he pulled out his
underwear, t-shirts and jeans and stuffed them into the bag.

Vivien appeared at the doorway.
“Aiden, what you doing?” she quavered.

“I told ya. I’m fucking off...
getting out of this shithole,” he replied flatly, avoiding her eyes as he
strode over to his wardrobe and began frantically packing his shirts and
trousers.

Leaning under the bed, he prised
up two floorboards. Vivien watched him with intrigue, not daring to voice the
complaint she was about to make about the damage to her floor. He dipped his
hand down into the hole and pulled out a metal box with a combination padlock
and stuffed it into the top of the bag.

“What was that?” she asked
suspiciously.

“Money.”

Vivien didn’t respond. Zipping
the bag up, he barged past her and entered the bathroom. Opening the cabinet,
he took out his toothbrush, razor and shaving gel and stuffed it into the side
pocket of the kit bag. Vivien stood out in the hallway. When Aiden re-appeared,
she followed him back down the stairs.

“Aiden...”

He ignored her. He ignored
Kate too as he stormed past her. She stood when her mother entered the room
again, her expression pleading with her to do or say something to change his
mind. When Aiden reappeared, he had a can of cider in hand and his kit bag over
his shoulder.

“Aiden, where you going?” Kate
asked desperately.

He strode to the door leading
out to the hallway. Vivien stepped aside before he could knock her again.
Turning to his sister, he spat sardonically, “Now you’ll have them to yourself.
Good luck!”      

“Aiden!” Kate screamed, but he
did not turn back.

Aiden pounded on the door of Roy and Gina’s flat with
such conviction that Gina thought it was the police coming to arrest her father
over something or other. When she swung open the door, she was initially
relieved to see it was Aiden, but then she took in the state of him. “Jesus!”
she gasped, her wide green eyes searching his swollen and blooded face. She
pulled him into the flat and closed the door. “What happened?

“My
cunt
of a dad and I
just had a fight... I’ve walked out...”

“Well, you can’t stay here! My
dad would flip his lid!”

Aiden’s swollen eyes narrowed.
“Thanks for your fucking sympathy, G...”

She sighed. “You know what I
mean... I’d have you here in a heartbeat, but...”

“Where is he?”

She rolled her eyes. “Early
doors at the pub, I expect. I’ve just got in...”

“Got in from where?” he asked,
narrowing his eyes further.

“The
shop
... God,
you’re bossy! Have you been taking lessons from Roy?”

Aiden smirked. “We weren’t
blessed with the greatest of parents, were we?”

This small disclosure took her
by surprise. Aiden wasn’t one for voicing his private thoughts and it warmed her
heart that he would confide in her, if just a little.

The substandard quality of their
parentage was something they had in common, something they could relate to and
agree on. She revelled in moments like these, when Aiden opened up to her. “What
happened?” she whispered.

“
Kate
happened...”

Gina frowned but then she
recalled the events of the previous day and Aiden’s distress over the party.
“What did she do?”

Aiden turned on his heels and walked
into the kitchen. “You got anything to drink?”

“Top cupboard, on the
right...”

Gina watched him pull out a
bottle of whisky from her father’s extensive collection of spirits and pour
himself a large glassful. “Want one?” he offered.

She shook her head. It was
only 11am. “So?” she pressed.

He took a large gulp of
whisky, hesitated, then announced, “I hit her.”

“Oh.”

“Then she blabbed and Duggie went
off on one.”

“I can’t imagine that he’s in any
better state than you.”

Aiden’s lips twitched into a
smile of gratification. “I think I broke his nose.”

Gina let out a puff of
laughter. Smiling fondly at him, she reiterated her point from before, “I would
take you in, Aiden, if it wasn’t for me dad. You know that, don’t you?” He
drained his glass and nodded. “Do you want something to put on that?” She gestured
to his cut lip.

“Nah...”

“Let me look after you, at
least before Roy gets home,” she urged affectionately.

Aiden stared warily at her for
a long moment. He wasn’t used to people wanting to take care of him, but the
thought of being fussed over for a while was sort of appealing to him. He could
just relax for a couple of hours. Gina would provide him with whatever he
wanted. She was good at looking after people, having had to look after her
father practically all her life. He had his mother to do that for
his
father,
stupid cow that she was.

He surrendered. “Alright, I’m
yours to fuss over.”

He looked contrite,
embarrassed even, and despite the bruising and the swelling, this rare
vulnerability and his shy smile made him look more handsome than ever. Gina’s
heart skipped a beat and she grinned. “Go and lay on the couch and I’ll get
some Savlon for that lip!” she instructed enthusiastically, and, spinning on
her heels, she jogged into the hallway and headed for the bathroom.

Aiden’s mood suddenly and unexpectedly
lifted, and he had Gina to thank for that. Smiling to himself, he grabbed the
whisky bottle to help himself to another large shot. He was just twisting off
the lid when he heard Gina’s gut-wrenching scream. Frowning, he placed the
bottle back down on the counter and walked into the hallway.

“G? What’s going on?” he asked,
then tailed off as he halted in the doorway to the bathroom and was met with
the lifeless body of Roy Watson.

Roy was lying on his back in a
bath filled with murky red water. His head was slumped to one side, his tongue
hanging out a touch over his bottom lip, and his eyes were closed but rimmed
with red blemishes – evidence that he may have been crying before his death. A
bottle of vodka floated by his feet. The bottle had been smashed in half,
leaving jagged shards of glass around the rim. Roy’s arms rested on either side
of his round stomach and, through the diluted bloodied water that masked his naked
body, Aiden could see deep slashes in both of his wrists.

“Fuck!” Turning to Gina, he
grabbed her and pulled her out of the room. She was limp in his arms, a
trembling mass of delirium. “G, look at me.”