Igniting the Wild Sparks (30 page)

“Oh, right.
Injured player.” Ricky shrugs and adjusts his own ball cap. “If she can’t fully participate, have her suck your cock then. I think that one’s in the playbook.”

Finn laughs.
“She probably wouldn’t do that.”

“Why not?
Do you think she’s still hung up about doing it? You said she tried at your mom’s. She hasn’t done it again?”
If I thought I was mortified before, this is beyond! He said he doesn’t tell Ricky everything. I guess this doesn’t fall into the
everything
category!

“No
.”
Holy shit! Shut up, Finn!

“
Why? Did you have to give her a roadmap and a magnifying glass to find it?”

“Funny.”

Ricky pops another bubble and smilingly adds, “Sit next to her, whip your dick out and shove her head down. She’ll get the message.”

“
She’s supposed to be taking it easy.”

“
She
is
taking it easy if she’s fucking you.”

Finn
incredulously laughs and before he can reply, Ricky says, “Well, it’s definitely not your sex life making you a grouch. That was embarrassingly evident at Easter.”

“I didn’t tell you to spy on us, dickwad.”

“I didn’t have to spy. You were doing a pretty good job of advertising it. I’ve never heard you
that
loud before.”
What the fuck? Ricky’s heard us having sex before? This only gets worse!

Ricky stretches his arms above his head and I duck. Peeking through the window of the truck, I see him looking toward the field. Shit.

Finn says, “Before we head back, I wanted to tell you that I, uh, told her the one thing I didn’t want to.”

Ricky drops his arms and his jaw. “You actually told her you’ve wanted to marry her for three years now
? Are you engaged?” He gawks at Finn in disbelief. “Shit, why didn’t you tell me, man? We’ve been talking and you just
now
mention it?”
Three years? I’ve been praying for that long he’d change his mind! What the hell, Finn?

“We’re not engaged.”

“What do you mean? Are you going to officially propose then?”

Finn glances at the ground.
“Um, I did get down on my knee, but she didn’t give me a chance to ask before she took off. She’s not stupid. She knows I won’t marry her.”

Losing his smile, Ricky actually
glowers. “Fuck. You’re an idiot. I told you that you’re going to lose her.”

Not looking up, Finn shakes his head and mutters,
“We talked. She says she understands.”

“Like shit she does.”

“I’m getting closer to being able to, but… I don’t know. Maybe soon.”
Soon? I think I feel my orange flaring.

“You think you’ll really marry her?”

“It’s not that I don’t want to, but…”
But what?

Ricky roughly sighs.
“I know, Finn. Don’t be. Look at all the other shit you do. You don’t let anything get the best of you.”

“
I know this, but marriage is different. It’s not a stunt, Rick. I don’t want to ruin what we have together or go through what my parents, my sister, or you have. If Becks and I don’t get married, then we won’t get divorced.”

“What the hell kind of logic is that? Did you read that in a
Highlights
magazine at your dentist?”

“It’s the only logic that makes sense to me.”

“I know it’s not a stunt, but you’d better get your ass in gear because Hadley will move on.”

“She says she loves me. Why should our love be on the condition that I put a ring on her finger?”

“You know it’s more than that.”

“Yeah, I do know. That’s why it’s so hard for me to go against everything I’ve believed for so long.”

“Man, you’re fucked up. Does your girlfriend know exactly how much?”

“I’m going to venture a wild guess and say she does, but that’s merely conjecture.”

“Did you finally resolve your standoff?”

“Not really.”

“You mean, you’re still charging into a monsoon without a raincoat?”
I can’t believe how much Finn tells Ricky! He got mad because I talk marriage with Morgan. This is 1,000 times worse!

I see Finn’s red hat bobbing. “Yeah.”

“Why would you do that?” When Finn doesn’t answer, Ricky probes, “And you’ve been shooting blind since
Easter
? Man, you need to watch it or you’re going to knock her up fast, and that’s the last thing you want.”

“I know, but it’s been
incredible. It’s like a whole different experience. I thought I knew before with that shit we use, but no. It’s so damn good. I’m addicted.”

Ricky laughs. “Shit. It’s not like you were a virgin.”

“No, but I’ve never had sex without one before her.”

“Aww. So, little Hadley popped your rubber cherry.”

Raising an eyebrow, Finn chuckles. “I guess.”

“If it’s that damn good, y
ou should just get the Big Snip. Fixed.”

Finn shakes his head
. “She’d
kill
me.”

“You don’t want kids. She knows this.
You and I could go in together and get the group discount.” Ricky laughs and blows a gigantic, pink bubble, snapping it noisily and proudly grinning at Finn, who doesn’t seem to be paying attention as he stares at the parked car in front of them.

“Yeah, she does know.
Still, if I told her I want to have that done, she’d threaten to dump my ass, like she did with New River or my skydiving.”

“Uh-huh.
Right. New River. You still haven’t told her the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you God. Have you?”

What?

“You
know
I can’t tell her about that, Ricky. She worries and I told her I wouldn’t do it anymore.”

What the hell?

“She doesn’t catch on to all those camping or
work
trips? She thinks you’re
that
much in demand?”

“I
do
work a lot, asshole.”

Ricky crosses his arms and shakes his head at the car next to him, looking as if he’s searching for the right words he wants to say. “Yeah, but not as much as she thinks you do. You’ve been doing all this on the sly, so don’t say you can’t do something or that you can’t lie to her because, technically, you’ve been doing both.”

“Why are you getting so pissed off?”

I’m able to see Ricky’s glare from here. “Because I know what lies can do to people. I’ve had to learn that lesson the hard way.”

“You didn’t lie to Nina. She caught you with that skank.”

“Yeah, but I was lying to her about all the nights I had to
work. Do you want her to catch you in this lie or find out what you’ve been doing in your spare time?”

“I’m not lying to her. She’s never asked about what I’ve been doing.”

“So what you haven’t told her! She’ll take omission as a lie. Trust me.”

“You’re suddenly Dr. Phil now?”

“I’m just warning you. You’re putting yourself on shaky ground with Hadley by refusing to marry her and then with the shit you’re hiding.”

“I’m handling it.”

“I hope so because if she finds out from someone else, you’re fucked and not in the oh-Finn-give-it-to-me-harder way.”

Finn rolls his eyes and snaps, “Okay, Tesco. I get it.”

Holy fuck! He’s jumping off the fucking bridge or skydiving again. We just had a talk about honesty at Chimborazo. Here, he’s been lying to me the whole time.

Stunned, I silently
creep away, not able to listen to any more of Finn’s private revelations about Cara’s sexual aspirations, my damn shortcomings or his Spiderman desires.

I dart into the nearby bathroom and stand by the doorway, peeking my head out every five seconds to see if they’re still there. Finally seeing them walk to the field, I wipe my eyes and numbly take the clipboard to Finn’s car, leaving it on his driver’s seat.

Lying on my bed, I stare at the pictures of my Sparks and me. What do I do? I can’t tell Finn I was listening to Ricky and him talk. That’s shady in and of itself.

Apa
rt from his penchant to be Jack Be Nimble, as Rod would probably call him, I’m hurt and mad that Finn was talking about what we were doing in his room, and that I’ve never done it to him before then. Am I a joke that he and Ricky dole out? A blow job punch line, perhaps? I’m utterly embarrassed. Ricky has to think I’m a jerk, as well as a horrible girlfriend.

Looking around the dimly-lit
bar, I wrinkle my nose in disgust. I wouldn’t even classify it as a bar. It’s a dive, really. The floor is sticky and the red pleather seat I’m sitting on is grimy, more so than a city bus’ or a sperm bank’s door handles. The cigarette smoke floating around makes my eyes and throat burn. Some people sit at the bar trying to score a date for the night or an hour, while others sit and wallow into their beers alone. The sound of pool balls clacking against each other in another room is supplemented by loud yelling and laughing.

“Hadders, listen to me.”

I mindlessly blink as I stare at the burly bartender pouring a beer from a rusty-looking tap. “What?”

Sudden clicking is next to my ear. “Hadders. Over here.” Jumping to a start, I irritably turn to him.
“We need to go. We shouldn’t be here.”

Blinking again at Rod, I see that h
e’s wearing a Care Bears T-shirt, which is tight and really worn. It looks like it belongs to one of his sisters, yet I highly doubt it. “Why? Don’t I have the right to know what’s going on?”

“Yeah. I mean, no. You need to be home resting.”

I impishly smile. “I will not be taken for a fool anymore, Rod. I know what he’s doing when he says he’s ‘working.’”

“Hadders, it doesn’t matter anymore. I don’t want you to be here. Let’s go.”

“No way.”

“This place is
scaring the shit out of me. So is your outfit.”

I look down
. I’m wearing a small, black denim vest with zippered pockets, buttoned only halfway. My red bra peeks through the opening, showcasing my very ample breasts. I don’t remember them being
this
big. I’m also wearing Morgan’s skirt I wore to the club. Even the last two buttons are undone as they were when I left the place last. I then notice the thigh-high boots. I’ve never worn those before. They’re nearly taller than me.

When I turn my head
to look to the bar again, I notice my hair doesn’t move with me. Reaching up, I feel my short hair beneath my fingers. No more ponytail.

As I contemplate the drastic change in my appearance, I recognize a familiar face walking past the bar with a plastic bimbo hanging on his arm. Ricky. He’s married. What’s he doing here with that
bag of trash? They stop and Ricky says something to the bartender, while the slut giggles and trails her fingers down Ricky’s chest. I can’t believe he’d cheat on Shay after what he did to Nina.

Then, I hear his voice before I see him. My Sparks. His hair is all brown in the
dingy lighting. I want to jump up and run to him, but the sight of the blonde with her arm hooked through his stops me. Her hair is in a sloppy ponytail and she’s wearing a white, see-through blouse, displaying her black bra underneath. Her skirt is short enough to make mine look demure.

They reach the bar and stand next to Ricky. The blonde sleaze turns to Finn
and sinking her fingers into the front of his jeans, yanks him forward. Even from here, I can see the blazing look in his eyes he gets right before he fucks me. He’s giving her that stare …

No. No. No… That’s
my
look.

Rod grabs my wrist. “Hadders, come on. You shouldn’t see this.”

I can’t take my eyes off of them. “What’s he doing with her?”