Igniting the Wild Sparks (67 page)

Whoa. I never thought I’d be
this
up close with Finn Wilder, or my best friend’s boyfriend—ex-boyfriend. It’s somewhat awkward, but effective in getting my point across. I do have to note that Hadley was a lucky woman from what I can feel.

He grunts and curves inward,
pushing on my arm. I have to be fast. “Did you have fun mouth surfing that whore? Was it worth losing the best thing that ever happened to you?”

His yell is
strangulated, “Fuck! Let go!”

I viciously grin. “Why? You let Cara play with it. I was just taking my turn.”

“He gasps, “I made a mistake!”

“Really now? I wasn’t sure if you had.”

“Yes!”

“I imagine you had told Hadley that
this,
” I squeeze and he stridently groans, “was hers. Yet, you let that cunt Cara use it as a pacifier. Why is that?”

“Let go!”

“Why? So you can get it hard again and find another trouser troll?”

“No!”

I release him and he exhales in relief, bending and shouting at the floor, “Fuck, Morgan!”

I step back and flagrantly laugh. “I heard Hadley kneed you in the balls. That’s classic.”

As he slowly stands straight, he curtly replies, “Yeah.”

“So you made a mistake?” I ask him as I pull my phone
from my pocket.

He sighs and tosses his hair with his fingers
, while using his other hand to soothe and/or hide his cock from another assault. He wouldn’t
dare
report me. He says, “Yes. A monumental one. Look, you literally had me by the balls. I know you’re pissed off, and you should be. Can you just leave it at that and go?” Nope. I haven’t even begun to squeeze.

I don’t answer him, but ask, “Did you love Hadley?”

He frowns and glumly says, “You know I do.”

“No, I don’t.
If I have to gauge it off you sticking your cock into Cara’s mouth, then well, I’m a little bit dissuaded.”

“I thought Hadley and I…
Fuck. I don’t have to explain it to you. I’m sure she already did.”

“No. She gave me
her
side, which is not the side that made you cross that line. She didn’t trust Cara! She thought you might’ve had a thing for her, and then for Hadley to see you getting blown by her, that kind of ruined her life!”

With one hand still clamped over his crotch, he waves his other around erratically.
“I don’t know what to say! As I’ve told everyone else, I’m a fucking asshole for doing that!”

“And you lost the best thing that will ever happen to you.”

Finally releasing his junk, he sounds repentantly sincere. “I know. Hopefully she can forgive me and maybe we can…” Still self-assured, I see.

I laugh.
“What? Get back together?”

“I want to marry her, Morgan.”

“Oh.
Now
you do?”

“
I always have. I’ll take her to Vegas. I begged her to marry me.”

“After she
begged you,
right?”

His hands go into his hair and he shouts,
“I know I fucked up! I can’t say that enough! I want to fix it! I’ll take her to Vegas tonight if she wanted or I’ll wait for her to plan the wedding of her dreams! Or, we can do both! I’ll marry her as many times as she wants! Whatever Becks wants!”

“She’s not your Becks anymore.”

“She’ll
always
be my Becks.” He’s determined. That’s good.

“Would you buy her a ring and propose to her first?”

He immediately answers, “Yeah. If she takes me back, that’s the first thing I’m doing.”

“
You think she’d say yes now? You should’ve done that a long time ago.”

“
You’re right.” Bonus point for Wilder.

Time for the true test.

“Well, you don’t have to worry about buying her a ring.”

He’s
restrained. “Why?”

“Because she already has one. From Shane.” I hold up my phone and show him the picture of Shane and Hadley at my wedding rehearsal. He’s carrying her bridal style in his arms. “They eloped this morning.”

He looks closer at the picture and then scoffs at me in disbelief, “No, they didn’t.”

“They did. She wants to move on and he’s willing to give her what she wants. A marriage. Children.
Fidelity. You didn’t. What did you do? You cheated on her! Twice!” I flip through more pictures of them together in the hotel. He can’t tell from the picture where they were taken. I made sure to get plenty where they were looking cozy. I wanted backup if Finn turned down her proposal. I was only going to spook him before. I never thought the answer would’ve led to him cheating on her.

Now, I’m out to scare the living shit out of him.

He argues, “She wouldn’t just move on like that. She needs time.”

“You would never
cheat on her like that, either. Would you?” His mouth drops open and he looks at the pictures more intently. “Cut to the core, she was desperate to forget the pain you caused her. She and Shane have been friends for some time now. She thought he was the most logical choice to help her forget.”

He shakes his head as he stares at my phone.
“No.”

“They’re having a reception later. I’m sorry you’re not invited.”

Finn glances at me, and I can tell I’m seriously rattling his cage. “Please, tell me you’re joking.”

“No. It’s too late. You lost her. You really thought she was going to take you back after what you did to her?”

He anxiously bites his lip and says, “I’m calling her.”

I shrug and laugh. “You do that!” He grabs his phone off the bar, hits a number and puts the phone up to his ear as he glares at me.
Seconds later, his eyes widen when he hears her number is no longer is service.

“She changed her phone number?”

“Yeah. She didn’t want you harassing her. Neither did Shane.”

Lowering his phone, he peers around his kitchen.
“I need to talk to her.”

“Well, she’s kind of busy at the moment, getting married today and all. You’re more than welcome to send her a card telling her congratulations. That would be nice.
I believe they’re registered at Macy’s.” That was low, but he’d never check.

He’s still clinging to denial, but he’s wavering fast.
“She wouldn’t. No.”

“She did. Now leave her the fuck alone. She’s trying to move on with her life, like you did without her.”

He fiercely asserts, “I wasn’t moving on without her! I don’t want Cara! I want Hadley! I love her! I won’t live without her! Fuck! She’s all I’ve ever wanted!”

“Could’ve fooled her! She’s gone now!”

“No!” He grips the counter edge and his eyes flash, giving him more life than he had when I first walked in here.
Come on, Wilder. Fall for it.

“It wasn’t just the cheating. It was the lies, your
rejection of commitment, and the refusal to have children with her! Hell, you kept her a secret for three years from everyone!” I wonder if amid my lies he’ll figure out which are the truths.

“I wasn’t anymore!
I introduced her to people! I told her everything!”

“Everything? Really? The skydiving? The kiss with Cara?”

“What’s that matter now? How’s a kiss compare to what we did?”

“Because you were carryin
g on a long-term affair with that bitch!”

He’s approaching hysterics.
“No I wasn’t! It was that one kiss and it meant
nothing
!”

“But the blow job meant something?”

“No!”

“Did you tell Hadley about
the kiss?”

He throws his hands up.
“I was going to! Her proposal kind of threw me! She then took off! I forgot to mention it when she walked in on us! After that, it flew to the bottom of my to-do list!”

I calmly say,
“You don’t have to worry anymore because I already told her.” Just a little more.

He’s taken by surprise, it seems.
“You told her about the kiss?”

“Yeah
, and that you were fucking Cara for a while.”

He doggedly yells,
“I
wasn’t
!” He grabs his keys off the bar and hurriedly puts his shoes on. “Fuck, I have to talk to her.”

I step in front of him on his way to the door.
“You think she’s going to believe a fucking word you say? All you do is lie to her!”

We’re in each other’s face.
“I’m not lying about this!”

“She won’t believe you!”

“I have to
make
her believe me. I’m telling her the truth! I was
not
having an affair!”

“You’re nothing but a lie and a cheat
! You lost Hadley Beckett forever because you are a fucking pussy! You didn’t man up and marry her, or could’ve told her the truth if it saved your sorry life! She’s with a man who’ll give her what she wants!”

“I will!” His hands go to his hair
again and I know I’m almost there. “I’ll marry her! I’ll give her a baby! I’ve
been
trying to get her pregnant! I want her to have our baby!”

What?

Temporarily confused, I regain my composure. “It’s too late! You had the world in your hands and you lost it! She’s gone!”

He yells up at the ceiling,
“No!” He leans against the entryway wall and in his already-weakened state of mind, I go in for the easy kill.

“I wonder if he’ll knock her up tonight.”

“No!” I watch as Finn Wilder sinks to the floor in a defeated heap. Now I do feel cruel, but he has to believe he’s truly and permanently losing her. After I leave, he needs to get up and openly fight for her. We’ll take her away for the weekend, and while we’re gone, he should have shown up at the firm or at her apartment, demanding to see her. He should keep doing it until he can see her, wanting to know if she married Shane. When she says she didn’t, he should then declare his love for her and again beg for her forgiveness. He needs to be actively showing her he wants her back. He should broadcast his mistakes on
The Wild Side,
declaring his love for her, even proposing to her on the Air. I know she would be so embarrassed, but it’d be the good kind.

I dare you, Finn Wilder
, to fight to the death for Hadley Beckett.

Rod thinks we should leave them alone to work it out themselves. No!
Finn needs to prove his love for her! Make him pay the toll. He needs to walk through fire for her, and if he doesn’t, then she’s better off without the coward. I know I’m going to catch a lot of shit from Hadley for doing this, if Finn accepts my challenge, but she’ll hopefully understand that I did this to protect her from another heartbreak, courtesy of Finnigan Wilder.

“Yes. Now leave her alone to be happy. You owe her that much
.”

Tears streak his
face and I’m taken aback, almost forgetting what I’m trying to do. I thought he’d get mouthy with me and blow me off before the seed of doubt took root. This was almost too easy. I never thought I’d cut him this much to the quick and now that I have, it feels almost wrong, but not as wrong as what he did to my best friend.

He clutches his head and yells at the floor,
“I love her!” He hangs his head and his shoulders forcefully tremble. “Becks! No!”

I softly clear my throat and say, “Let her go.” I turn and leave his apartment, hearing his sobs as I close the door.
Letting out a big breath of air, I hurriedly go to my car.

One thing I don’t have covered is Rod’s phone. I know he’s still talking to Finn. Shit. I need to get to the office and get his phone before Wilder calls him.

Good luck, Finn Wilder. You’re going to need it to win this dare.

CHAPTER
30

FINN

No. She couldn’t have.

Becks marrying Shane?

She’s supposed to marry
me
.

How could Becks fall out of love with me so fast?
I made a monstrous mistake. I thought we were over. I was weak and tried to find a way to cope.

Nevertheless, she’s right. I didn’t have faith in us and I gave in to Cara. However, I never stopped believing that what Becks and I had was special. At least, I
thought we did. Shit, was she ever really in love with me in the first place?

S
taggered by what Morgan told me, I get out of my car in a stupor. I couldn’t just sit at home and accept that Becks ran off to marry him. I have to see it for myself.

Still in a trance stepping off the elevator, I turn right and
march down the hall to her apartment with invincible purpose. As a habit, I go to put the key into the doorknob, but realize I’m not as welcomed as I used to be, and if what Morgan said is true, she’s not alone. Fuck. What will I say if he answers the door? What will I say if Becks does? I don’t know, but I need to find out.

Anxiously shoving my keys into my pocket,
I knock on the door, but there’s no answer. Her car is in the parking lot. Leaning away from the door, I peer down the hallway to see if maybe she had gone somewhere and is just coming home, but no Becks. Is Rod really driving her every day still, or did she already move in with Shane? No. It doesn’t make sense with her car here.

Becoming more desperate,
I knock more insistently and listen again, but I don’t hear any stirring from inside. “Becks! Answer the door!” Nothing. I glance up and down the hall, but nobody is around. On this floor, it’s just Becks and her neighbor. Digging my keys back out, I insert her apartment key into the lock, expecting it to pop open, but it doesn’t. I pull the key out to make sure I have the right one and I put it back into the handle, only to be thwarted once more. She changed her lock?

I
gawk at the door in horrified disbelief. First her phone number, now her lock? Possibly adding Shane to her life, too? She’s moved on without me already? I suppose I did my own
moving on
before I thought things through, but I was
always
thinking about Becks. Even with Cara. Becks was the one I imagined… Shit.

“Becks!” I shake my head and
impatiently spit, “Fuck.” I try again, “Hadley!” I lick my lips and clamp down on my teeth. “I need to talk to you!” Is she in there and just not answering me, hoping I’ll go away quietly? Not a fucking chance. I made a scene the other night trying to get her to open the damned door, and I’ll do it again. I don’t care if I go to jail because it’d be better than my apartment. I can’t live there anymore. Looking at my bed makes me physically sick. I want to torch it. Some of my best memories with Becks happened there… and then the worst.

“Hadley! I’m begging you! Let me in!” Still no answer.
I pound on the door in frustration before leaning my head onto it, closing my eyes. “I’m so sorry I hurt you! You’re all I’ve ever wanted! You’re my dream girl! My Becks!” I erratically inhale before shouting to the closed door, “I want to marry you, Becks!” I suddenly laugh, thinking of what I did for her. “I can show you! You dared me! I have the proof on me! Tell me I’m not too late! I love you! Marry me, Hadley Beckett! Be my Becks Wilder! Be my wife!”

I
can’t
be too late.

More
silence from her apartment. Did she really leave town like she said she was going to when she was drunk? I didn’t know if it was true, but then Morgan corroborated it.

Am I
really
too late?

Lifting my head, I drop my keys and pound on the door with both fists. “Becks, open the fucking door!”

With no response, I’ve reached my breaking point. Turning around, my hands go into my hair as I lean against the door, and slide down to the floor. I can’t stop the tears. I don’t even give a fuck anymore who sees me. I’ve never cried so much in my miserable life. Becks, Ricky, Simone, Hank, Becks’ neighbor, and Morgan have all seen me blubber. Hell, all my neighbors saw me crying. I’m probably on YouTube by now.
Finn Wilder, Richmond’s Biggest Cry Ass
.

I’m surprised I didn’t make my own
damn newscast. Hank loved reading about my Monday night in the paper. He had called me into his office and demanded to know what happened. He could see I had a busted lip, scratches on my face, and how despondent I was, if that’s the word I want to use. There’s not one in the English dictionary that can describe how I feel about losing the absolute love of my life. I told Hank that Becks and I argued and broke up. He asked if I had hit her; though, I may as well have. I said no and started crying on demand. The only reason I had gone to work was that I had to get out of my apartment, from Ricky, and my sister. I confessed to Hank about cheating on Becks, but I didn’t tell him with whom. He might’ve fired Cara. I couldn’t do that to her brand new career. It wasn’t even her fault. It was all mine, as usual, just as everything else has been. I should’ve been stronger than I was and not turned to her. I should’ve sought out Becks, but I thought I fucked us up beyond repair by telling her no. I should’ve…done a lot of things differently.

I bang the back of my head against the door, my sobs echoing in the hallway, “Baby, don’t leave me! Don’t marry
him
! Marry me! Shit! I can’t live without you! I’ve loved you from the very first moment I saw you in the ER! You’re my best friend, Hadley! I’ve
always
wanted to marry you! I was just a scared, stupid asshole!”

“That’ll win her back.” I roll my head to see Becks’ neighbor walking
to me from the elevator. I blink to see her from behind my glasses, not making an effort to wipe off my face. It’s not the first time I’ve cried in front of her. She saw me the other night when I was at Becks’ door, begging her to forgive me, and to marry me, yet again. Her neighbor was cool and didn’t threaten to call the cops. If truth be told, and it is, she came out and talked me down from the ledge, so to speak. Though, I was thinking about actually getting on one. She even gave me half a bottle of JD as a parting gift. Nice lady.

She asks, “She’s still not answering you?”

I hoarsely say, “No. Has she been here?”

She
remorsefully shakes her head. “I don’t know. I haven’t seen her, but I’ve been working afternoons. Her pregnant girlfriend was here earlier. She and that guy friend of theirs.”

Pulling my head from the door, I ask,
“Was he about six feet tall, short brown hair, probably wearing a shirt, tie, and a smart mouth?”

She laughs.
“Yes. He was quiet this time. The woman said hi to me as I was leaving for my dentist appointment. She said they were stopping to pack a suitcase for Hadley since they were leaving for the weekend, and if Hadley received any packages if I could pick them up for her.”

On the verge of hope and panic, I ask,
“Did she say where they were going?”

“No. Give her some time.”

“I don’t
have
time.” I stand up, lift my glasses and buff my eyes with the heel of my hand. “I’m going to lose her forever, if I haven’t already. Shit.”

“You’ve been with her for a long time, haven’t you?”

“Three years.”

“Is she the one?”

Without hesitation, I reply, “From the very second I saw her. I knew it. I want to marry her. I want her to have my kids.”
Kids
. Becks could be pregnant. She said she got her period, but was she lying about that? She just had a period recently. They usually are more spaced apart than that. Would she tell me if she were pregnant now? Would she not keep it because of what I did?

Her neighbor
says, “Then it’s never too late.”

She’s right.

Nodding, I push off the door and run to the elevator. It takes too long, so I punch the bar on the stairwell door and take them instead. What if Becks
is
pregnant? I don’t want that Shane fucker raising our kid, and she won’t be passing our baby off as his. Our baby will be a Wilder, just like Becks is supposed to be.

In the parking lot, I call Becks’ desk phone. Voicemail. Fuck. I’m sure she has caller ID.

Like a bat out of my own personal hell, I get into my car and peel out of the lot.

Ten minutes later, I’m at the law firm
in record time, speed limits be damned. I pull into a space near the entrance and resolutely stride into the lobby, stopping at the desk, where the two familiar guards instantly smile at me.

I’m greeted with, “Hi, Finn!” from both simultaneously. I’m in no state of mind for damn chitchat or gushing over me because I’ve met one of their heroes. My life is on the line.

“I need to see Hadley Beckett. Now.”

Their smiles fade somewhat, but they’re still eager to help. “Do you have an appointment?”

“No. Get me up there or get her down here. I don’t care.”

The younger one, Creyton his name tag reads, says, “Let me see if she’s in.”

“Wait. Didn’t she leave earlier with her friends?” the older guard, Heffernan, asks him. I feverishly look between the two as they slowly contemplate if they had or not.

“I think, but I’m not sure. I was on the phone with Dave—”

I irritably interrupt them, “Can’t you call upstairs? It’s an emergency. I
need
to see her right now.”

Looking a little flustered, Creyton says,
“Sure.” He picks up the phone and peruses through a list of numbers. Son of a bitch. I want to jump in the elevator, but if they’re like the ones in my building, you need a key card for it to open to the floors. They’d call the cops for sure. Ricky would be fucking pissed and probably not talk to me again. He and Simone have me under virtual house arrest. Though, it’s easy to sneak out when one of my caretakers works different shifts and the other is a 22-year-old who likes her social life. Ricky’s already threatened to arrest me for being a fucking prick, succumbing to Cara. Like he has room to talk. Still, I’m only allowed out to go to work and church, though I haven’t even been to Mass in a while. It’s not the same without Becks by my side and at present, I don’t even know what to say to God regarding what I’ve done.

The guard speaks to Rhonda, I’m assuming. He tries to flirt with her and I’m so close to wrapping the damn phone cord around his
fucking throat. I impatiently drum my fingers on the counter and Heffernan asks, “So Ms. Beckett is the infamous
Becks
tattooed on your chest?”

I nearly glare at him and woodenly answer,
“Yeah.”

“You must really love her to do something like that.”
How fucking dense is he?

I testily reply,
“Yeah, I do. I plan on marrying her.” That feels good to say that to someone. Finally. If it’s not already too late. I can’t be.

“You could dare her to marry you!” She dared me.

Fuck. I failed.

My exasperated glare hardens, yet he goes on to say,
“She’s nice. Pretty, too.” I wish he would shut the fuck up about my girlfriend.

My
ex
-girlfriend. Fuck me.

The clattering of the phone’s receiver, snags my attention and Creyton says,
“I’m sorry, Finn. Rhonda said Ms. Beckett is gone for the rest of the week.”

“Where’d she go?”

“Rhonda didn’t say. She said Greg and Morgan went with Ms. Beckett. So, I guess we did see them leaving.” They are the worst security ever.

I lean
onto the counter and push my hand into my hair. Where do I go from here? I don’t know where Rod or Morgan live. I asked Ricky to look them up for me, but he refused. He said to leave them alone before I’m arrested for harassment. I ought to have Morgan arrested for sexual assault, grabbing my junk earlier, but that would only make things worse with Becks, since she’d most likely approve of Morgan’s action.

“We wish we could help you.”

“Yeah, me, too.” I stand and leave before they can ask me about anything sports or dare-related.

Standing next to my car, I pull my phone out and call the law firm’s main number myself.

“Rhonda, it’s Finn.”

“Coach! How are you?”

“Not good. I really need to talk to Hadley.”

“Oh, I’m sorry. She’s not here.”

“Do you know where she went?”

“No, I don’t. All I know is that she left with Morgan and Rod earlier for the rest of the week. She didn’t tell you where she was going?” I guess she didn’t announce
what happened or our breakup to the office. Is that a good thing?

“Uh, no. She has a new phone number and I lost it already. I forgot where she said
was going.” Sounds like a caring boyfriend, not.

“Oh. I wish I could help you. Is Hadley okay? She’s been really unlike herself this week, when she’s been here
, that is.”