Lily’s War (34 page)

Lily glanced about her curiously. In her letter Jane had mentioned the town beginning its existence as a coaching stage on the road north to Lancaster. It had developed as a market town only after the surrounding area had been drained by the Scarisbrick family a couple of hundred years ago and now the land was heavily farmed. Lily enjoyed finding out these things. It gave her a sense of Britain and what fighting the war was all about.

They soon ran into trouble in the crowded streets because it was a Thursday and market day. Matt parked the car by a convenient pavement and suggested they walked round the stalls. The slower Lancashire dialect mingled with a surprisingly high number of nasal Scouse accents. It appeared that Nora and Jane were not the only Liverpudlians to take refuge there.

Their own conversation was desultory and concerned mainly with whether to buy some ginger parkin for Jane and home-made pink and white coconut ice for the twins. Lily bought both and Matt, who had wandered off, came back with two bunches of Michaelmas daises, one of which he handed to Lily without a word. She was touched by the gesture and although the shadow of depression was still there at the back of her mind somewhere she felt it lift.

They found Jane brushing up leaves with a besom in the front garden of the small terraced cottage she rented. As soon as she saw them, the broom slipped from her hands and she flew to the gate to open it. She hugged them both. Her hair was greyer and she had cut it short, but it seemed to Lily she had not changed in any other way.

‘It’s the gear to see you!’ she cried, ushering them into the house, talking non-stop.

It was not until after they’d eaten a hastily prepared meal of brawn, mashed potatoes and turnip cooked in a frying pan over the fire that Jane shooed Matt out. ‘Go and look at the church! It has a steeple and a tower ’specially made for some bells from Burscough Priory in the time of Henry VIII. There’s a bit of Lancashire history for you, lad! I want to talk to Lily.’ He went with good grace.

Jane waved Lily to the rocking chair in front of the blackleaded fireplace and seated herself a couple of feet away. She fixed her eyes on her, gimlet fashion. ‘Nora told me you lost a baby and that you and our Matt were having trouble,’ she said.

Coming so bluntly and out of the blue this caused memories to come flooding back and for a moment Lily was unable to speak. Then she managed to say, ‘It’s been a difficult time for both of us.’

‘Aye! Nora said you’d gone into yourself and Matt was lost as to how to winkle you out.’

‘I didn’t think she’d noticed,’ murmured Lily, slipping off her shoes and holding her stockinged feet out to the fire, more for something to do than because her feet were cold.

‘Well, she did! I remember myself doing the very same thing after I lost my baby. I never had the chance of another. Reg was killed on the Somme.’ For a brief second moisture glistened in the inner corners of Jane’s eyes. ‘Thousands of my generation lost our men. You’ve got yours. He mightn’t be perfect, Lily, because none of us are, but don’t let the time go by, only half living.’ She picked up the poker and shoved it into the fire. ‘I’ve said me piece. Now tell me how the rest of your family’s doing and then we’ll go and meet Matt at the church.’

All the way home Lily was thinking about Jane’s words, nursing Matt’s flowers in her arms as if they were a baby, and imagining if she was the older woman or even Vera. She was fortunate having Matt with her but that did not make it any easier to cross bridges.

Yet she had it in mind to start bridging the gap that night, but Matt was called out to a dying woman. The next day he was tired and it seemed harder than ever to attempt the seduction of a husband who was distracted by other people’s woes.

Christmas came but Rob did not, much to Lily’s relief. She believed violence would be the only outcome of him and Matt meeting. There was enough of that in the world, she thought, as they came out of church on Christmas morning.

‘Mr O’Hara is coming with us to Aunt Dora’s, isn’t he, Lil?’ asked Ronnie, as they walked home in bright sunlight. Matt and Mr O’Hara were bringing up the rear.

Lily glanced at her brother, considering how he had grown up in more ways than one in the last year. The tweed overcoat he wore belonged to Ben but only just fitted him. ‘I’ve told Aunt Dora that he’s clean, respectable, Protestant, and all alone in the world except for us,’ she murmured, her eyes twinkling, ‘and she has condescended to extend an invitation.’ She had asked Jane as well, but she was spending Christmas with Nora.

Ronnie’s face brightened. Lily knew her brother had taken a real shine to the old man, who possessed more knowledge where horses were concerned than William or her father. In truth he was swiftly becoming a father figure to Ronnie.

Mr O’Hara’s leathery face creased into a smile when Lily told him of Dora’s invitation. ‘Sure, and you’re a gorgeous woman, Mrs Gibson, lovely in looks and lovely in nature. Because I’m sure your aunt would not have thought of asking me if you hadn’t thought of it first.’

Lily smiled. ‘You’re a flatterer, Mr O’Hara. I’m sure you’ll say as much to my aunt, but I warn you, she’s suspicious of compliments and fine words.’

He winked at her, a devilish gleam in his other eye as he placed on his head a brown Derby with a sprig of mistletoe in its curling brim. ‘I’ve yet to meet the woman who doesn’t enjoy being told she’s a beauty, Mrs Gibson.’

‘Yes, Lily, don’t put Dermot off,’ said Matt, smiling. ‘I wouldn’t mind borrowing that hat of his for purposes of my own.’ She turned and looked at him and was suddenly breathless.

Dermot’s shrewd eyes passed from wife to husband. ‘Now, Matt. I’m sure you don’t need a sprig of mistletoe as an excuse to kiss your lovely wife whenever you feel like it. Although maybe me and the boy cramp your style at times.’ He smiled and hobbled slightly bow-legged out of the room, accompanied by Ronnie.

Lily went to follow them but Matt pulled her back and the expression in his eyes was intense. ‘Is it true, Lily, that I don’t need the excuse of a pagan custom to give my wife a Christmas kiss?’

She barely hesitated before pulling his arm around her waist. She was aware of a stir of excitement. How would it feel being kissed by him after all this time? His mouth came slowly down over hers. It felt good and her lips parted beneath his, prepared to extend the moment, but her brother called, ‘Time we were moving, Lil. We’ve got the tram to catch!’

Lily and Matt drew apart but she was aware of a warmth inside her that had been missing for a long time. He pulled her hand through his arm and they went to join the others.

The old farm kitchen rang with chatter as they gathered round the oak table. Both leaves had been pulled out to accommodate them all and it was covered by Dora’s best lace-trimmed linen tablecloth. In the centre was a cut glass bowl of apples and pears from the farm orchard and four precious Jaffa oranges. Firelight sparkled on crystal glasses, bought at Litherland and Co. in Bold Street in the year of the King’s coronation.

‘I told Dora that we have to make the most of these occasions,’ said William as he waved Lily and Matt to places either side of him. ‘It’s been a sad year for all of us in one way or another, and last Christmas we weren’t sure we’d survive it but we have.’

‘Yes. Let’s look on the bright side of life,’ said May, sliding on to a chair next to Matt. She picked up her glass and wiggled it under William’s nose. ‘I hope you’ve got something stronger than lemonade to fill this, dear uncle?’

‘Show a little decorum, May,’ said her aunt severely. ‘I don’t know what Mr O’Hara must think of you.’

‘Dermot, dear lady, and I’m thinking that the young miss is very pretty and charming.’ He seated himself next to Lily and smiled across at May.

‘I think you’re charming too,’ she said, tilting her head and grinning at him. ‘I suppose you’ve kissed the Blarney Stone?’

‘It was too far away, my dear. I’m just telling God’s own truth about you.’

Dora plonked another chicken down between the two of them. Her cheeks were flushed. ‘I think Matt should say grace and we get started or it’ll be supper time before we have dinner.’

Matt took the hint, adding a prayer for Ben’s safety and for peace in the world.

William opened one of the bottles of champagne he had bought in anticipation of Lily and Matt’s baby’s christening and they drank a toast to absent family and friends.

After the meal Ronnie, Matt, May and the twins took Dermot off to show him round the farm while William and Dora napped and Vera and Lily dealt with the washing up.

Lily had dried several plates before she realised Vera was dripping tears into the washing-up water. ‘What is it, love? Not bad news?’ she said with a mixture of anxiety and sympathy.

‘No! I was just thinking that this time last year Ben was here.’ Her voice had a desperate note to it as she plunged more plates into the sinkful of steaming water. ‘We were so happy! But now I can’t stop thinking – what if he doesn’t return? How’ll I bear it?’

‘You’ll bear it,’ said Lily, putting an arm round her. ‘You’re strong, love.’

‘I’m not!’ Tears brimmed in her eyes. She made to rub them away but only succeeded in getting soap in her eye. Lily handed her a dry tea towel. ‘Why don’t you leave these to me?’ she said quietly. ‘Go and get some fresh air. It’ll do you good.’

Vera nodded, and taking off her apron went outside. Hearing voices from the direction of the stables but wanting to be alone she went down the drive and through the gates. She had walked nearly the length of the lane when she saw a man coming towards her. He wore a tweed suit with a thick jumper underneath and the trilby on top of his dark head was pushed to the back. It was not until he spoke that she realised it was Rob. ‘Hi there, Vera!’ he called. ‘Anybody at home?’

Instantly she thought, I’ve got to get him away. ‘They’ve gone to Lily’s,’ she said swiftly. ‘Aunt Dora does Christmas dinner most years but this time Lily thought she’d give her a rest.’

‘Is that straight up?’ He drew closer and she caught a whiff of beer fumes.

She looked at him squarely. ‘Why should I say it if it isn’t?’

‘Why aren’t you with them?’

‘Someone has to stay behind and look after everything.’ A smile lit her face. ‘What is it you wanted?’

He swayed slightly. ‘I just wondered how Lily was. I’ve met her husband, you know.’

‘Have you?’ Vera could not conceal her surprise. ‘I suppose it was in Australia.’

‘Sure was.’ He paused and scowled. ‘Would you say they’re happy?’

‘Why shouldn’t they be?’ she prevaricated. Something had been wrong in the last months between them but she had put that down to their losing the baby. Now she wondered if Rob had anything to do with it.

‘Why not indeed?’ he muttered. ‘They’re together while thousands of couples are apart.’ He gazed at her from bleary eyes. ‘Your husband’s in the army, isn’t he? So’s my younger brother. Me and them are fighting for our countries while Matt gets away with it. Doesn’t seem right.’ He reached inside a pocket and taking out a pencil and a scrap of paper began to write.

She watched him crossly, knowing how hard Matt had worked during the blitz and since. How hard they all worked on the farm. She thought, there’s more than one way to fight a war, and who does he think he is, judging Matt?

Rob folded the paper and held it out to her. ‘Do me a favour, Vera. Give this note to Matt when you see him.’

His words puzzled her and she hesitated. ‘Are you sure this is for Matt and not Lily?’

‘Matt!’ He stared at her fixedly. ‘You make sure and do what I say.’ He saluted before turning and marching slightly unsteadily back up the lane.

Vera watched him until he was out of sight before going back to the farm. The first person she saw was May standing behind a tree. ‘What are you doing there?’ she whispered.

‘Playing hide and seek with the twins.’ May’s bright eyes looked her over. ‘You look guilty. Where’ve you been?’

‘For a walk.’ She hesitated. ‘Where’s Matt?’

‘He’s playing, too. I think he’s in that rhododendron over there.’ May’s expression was curious. ‘Why d’you want him?’

Vera hesitated. ‘I met Rob up the lane.’

May sighed. ‘Why didn’t you invite him in? He’s really my kind of dreamboat.’

‘I didn’t think it would be wise,’ said Vera slowly, her brows knitting. ‘I think he and your Lil nearly had a thing in Australia.’

‘What!’ May’s eyes widened and she let out a low whistle. ‘So that’s why she doesn’t want him hanging round. What did he have to say?’

Vera took out the note. ‘He gave me this to give to Matt. They knew each other in Australia apparently. I got the impression he didn’t like Matt.’

The two girls stared at each other.

‘Curiouser and curiouser as Alice said,’ murmured May. ‘I wonder what’s in the note.’

There was an uneasy silence and Vera picked at a corner of the paper hesitantly. May groaned, snatched it from her and unfolded the note. Vera looked over her shoulder and they read: ‘Matt, Ask Lily what we did in Cairns, Adelaide and on Bondi Beach. Rob Fraser.’

Their eyes met. ‘What do you think they did?’ whispered May.

‘Nothing!’ said Vera positively, wondering just how much May knew about sex and things. ‘Lily wouldn’t. He’s just out to cause trouble between them for some reason.’

May gnawed on her lip. ‘We’ll have to warn our Lil – and the best way of doing that is to give her the note.’ She pocketed it. ‘She’ll know exactly what to do with it.’

May passed the note to Lily as the family were having a light supper and she was handing round slices of Aunt Dora’s fruit cake, made with the extra ration of dried fruit for Christmas, and sugar saved for the purpose. ‘Look at it in private,’ she whispered.

Lily gave her an amused look. ‘What is it? Something out of an old cracker?’

‘You’ll see. Just don’t let Matt see it,’ she hissed.

Lily was startled. ‘Why shouldn’t I?’

‘Shhh! He’s looking. Just remember Vera and I are here if you need us.’

‘Thanks,’ said Lily, wondering what was up. She slipped the note up her sleeve and curiosity took her to the bathroom.

As she read the note she went rigid with shock. How had May come into possession of the note? Matt must not see it. Not now when things were starting to get better between them. The note hinted at so much. What had Rob thought Matt would do? Throw her out in his direction? She could have laughed at the thought if she had not been so worried and angry. How could he say he loved her and do this to her? It was she who would get hurt as much as Matt.