Love Left Behind (40 page)

"No, it's okay
Jackson. My doorman got me through the crowd of paparazzi, even though they
were like rabid animals frothing at the mouth for a comment. I thought you said
they were tamer in New York."

"Not when they
have a juicy story. And unfortunately, this story is like prime rib to
them." Jackson's voice got quieter. "I can't tell you how sorry I am
about all this. But I'll fix it, I promise. I won't let you get hurt."

"It's not your
fault," I murmured.

"It
is
my fault. I was too careless."
Jackson sighed before continuing. "I'll contact you tomorrow to let you
know what the next steps are."

After I ended the call
with Jackson, I forced myself to scroll through all my messages, deleting most
of them without listening to them. I had repeated missed calls from my mother
and Trisha, and I reluctantly called them back, reassuring them that I was okay
but refusing to give details about what was happening.

I was dreading work the
next day and I contemplated calling in sick, but I decided I wasn't going to
let myself be bullied into hiding. I tried to prepare myself for whatever was
waiting for me outside my apartment building as I rode the elevator down,
grateful that I at least had a doorman who was willing to run interference.

"Emma!" Harry
exclaimed when he saw me exit the elevator. "How are you feeling?"

"I've had better
days but I'll survive," I replied, smiling at Harry's concerned
expression.

"Well, it was
smart of you to hire a bodyguard. I think he's going to be a lot more effective
at driving away those scumbags than I was. His arms are the size of my
thighs!"

"A
bodyguard?" I wrinkled my brow in confusion. "I didn't hire a
bodyguard."

"Then who's
that?" Harry pointed to a mountain of a man that was standing in the front
of the lobby, right by the doors. He was well over six feet with muscles that
looked like they were carved out of stone. He was an intimidating figure in a
tight black t-shirt and black pants.

He stepped forward when
he saw us watching him, holding out a hand. "Ms. Mills, I'm Craig. I'm
here to make sure you get to work safely."

I shook his hand, my
hand disappearing in his huge grasp. "I'm sorry, Craig, but I'm a little
confused. I didn't hire anyone to escort me to work."

"Mr. Reynard told
me to wait for you this morning. I'm supposed to escort you to work and
anywhere else you need to go."

I couldn't suppress the
surge of warmth that flooded my body when I realized that Jackson had sent
someone to protect me, even though I had refused his offer last night. I
decided to accept it since I didn't know what I was about to face.

I turned out to be
extremely grateful for Craig. He shielded me from the bodies trying to push
into me as we left my building, but I could still hear the questions that they
yelled at me. They were much harsher than yesterday with a sickening virulence.
I felt as if I were being stoned with words.

Craig ushered me into a
black Mercedes SUV with tinted back windows that looked like it should be
off-roading in a safari, not navigating the streets of New York. Craig slid
into the driver's seat after making sure I was safely ensconced in the
backseat, driving away so quickly the tires squealed. I saw him glance at me in
the rearview mirror.

"Are you okay, Ms.
Mills?"

I gave him a weak
smile, not wanting to show how rattled I was. "Yes, although I'm wondering
why anyone would want to be famous. I never realized how happy I was being a
nobody."

We drove the rest of
the way to work in silence as I prayed that there would be no press waiting for
me outside my office. I was relieved when I saw that no one was milling around
the front of my office building, but I still had to convince Craig that he
didn't need to escort me inside.

"But Mr. Reynard
said-"

"Craig, I'm
grateful for your help, but you can see that there's nobody around. I just want
everything to remain as normal as possible."

Craig relented when he
saw that I wasn't going to be swayed, but he told me that he would be waiting
for me outside after he made sure I programmed his number into my cell phone.

I tried to ignore all
the stares as I took the elevator to my floor and made my way to my office. I
could hear murmurings as I passed by, but I refused to pay attention to them.
Marie jumped up when she saw me, looking harried and stressed out.

"Emma, the phone
has been ringing non-stop. Every gossip rag seems to want a comment from you. I
even got calls from a few legitimate news outlets. What should I do?"

"Just tell them
all I have no comment." I couldn't believe how quickly my life had been
turned upside down.

"Mr. Carver wants
to see you as soon as possible."

I swallowed, a shaft of
fear shooting through me. Larry Carver was my direct boss and vice president of
account services. I rarely interacted with him and I had no doubt that he was
requesting my presence to discuss the situation with Jackson.

I made my way to
Larry's office after I dropped my things off in mine, trepidation growing with
each step.

"Hi, Sandy,"
I greeted Larry Carver's assistant. "Marie told me Larry wanted to see me
as soon as possible."

Sandy, an older woman
with hair as black as night, nodded at me and picked up the phone. "Mr.
Carver, Emma Mills is here to see you."

Sandy waved me into the
office and I entered, trying to tamp down my nerves. My anxiety was almost
choking me when Larry rose as I walked towards him, his eyes assessing me.

"Emma, thanks for
coming by. Have a seat."

I perched on the edge
of a chair opposite Larry's massive walnut desk, folding my hands on my lap as
I watched him sit back down.

"No problem,
Larry. What did you want to talk about?"

"It hasn't escaped
my notice that there has been a bit of fervor about you in the press. We had to
put extra security guards in our lobby and threaten to call the police before
the press would leave this morning."

My stomach clenched,
now understanding why there hadn't been anyone to harass me this morning when I
had arrived.

"I'm sorry, Larry.
All of this has been blown way out of proportion. It's not affecting my work, I
promise."

Larry rested his elbows
on his desk, steepling his hands. "I'm not in the habit of commenting on
the personal lives of my employees. And I don't plan on starting now, but this
is becoming a distraction at work.”

"I'm working on a
solution to diffuse the situation." I didn't explain that the solution
included telling the world about my past with Jackson. "I'll try to take
care of this as quickly as possible."

Larry nodded, leaning
back in his chair. "That's all I wanted to hear. You've been a great asset
since you've started working here, Emma. I'd hate to have something so petty
affect your future here at Forrester."

I nodded quickly,
understanding that I was getting a warning. "I've been extremely satisfied
working here as well. I promise that I have everything under control."

Resentment was boiling
under my skin when I left Larry's office. I couldn't believe my career was in
jeopardy because of some stupid bitch who wanted to sell some records. My anger
got me through the rest of the day, erecting an invisible armor around me from
the stares and whispers. The one chink in my armor was when I had to go across
town to a client meeting, which Craig took me to. My client politely pretended
that my face wasn't currently plastered on every gossip rag, but I heard the
whispers as I left his office.

"What does he see
in her? She's nothing special."

"What a slut. I
can't believe someone could be so low as to ruin Jackson and Candace's
relationship."

"I heard she slept
with Jackson in the same bed that he shared with Candace."

I wished I could shut
my ears closed with my fingers and run away from the stares of censure, but I
forced myself to walk with my head raised high, acting like nothing was
affecting me.

At least no one was
talking about me audibly at my own office. Celeste had stopped by several times
to see how I was doing, realizing that being associated with Jackson was not
the boon she had expected considering the viciousness of the articles written
about me.

I received several
texts from Jackson throughout the day, checking to see how I was and making
sure Craig was being my shadow. I thanked him for providing me with him,
although I wondered if I should ask how much his services cost, not wanting to
be financially obligated to Jackson.

He became angry when I
voiced that thought when he called me later that night, just as I got home from
work.

"You don't need to
pay me back, Emma. This is all my fault. I shouldn't have been so
careless."

"Still," I
hedged. "I don't feel comfortable with you footing the bill. It's not your
fault Candace is making up these lies."

"We'll discuss it
later tonight. I'll be over at around nine."

"Is that a good
idea? What if the reporters see you? They're still hanging outside my building,
even with Craig here."

"You'll understand
later. Watch Entertainment Reporter at seven. I gave them my first
interview."

Jackson ended the call
without saying anything else and I checked my watch, seeing that I still had
half an hour before the show aired. I forced myself to make a sandwich and eat
it despite the lump in my throat that made it difficult to swallow. This was
the first time in a long while that I had lost my appetite.

It was torture waiting
for seven o'clock to roll around and I was glued to the television screen when
the intro for the entertainment news show came on.

"We have an
exclusive interview with Jackson Reynard about his split from Candace
Stile," the host announced. "I spoke with him earlier today and what
you're about to hear will change your opinion about everything."

The show cut to a prerecorded
video of the host interviewing Jackson. I swallowed when I saw Jackson
onscreen, looking as beautiful as he was solemn. The close-up on his face
showed his green eyes looking serious, while his tousled hair gave him an air
of boyishness.

"Jackson, the
press has been pretty relentless about your break-up with Candace Stile. I'm
glad that you're finally telling your side of the story, but what made you
decide to grant an interview? It's no secret that you're usually reticent about
giving interviews regarding your personal life."

Jackson leaned forward,
looking at the host with sincerity shining in his eyes. "Andy, it's
because I need to speak out for the one person that's being wrongly vilified in
this situation. I'm the one to blame for this whole mess. It's true that
Candace and I dated casually. She's a valued colleague and someone I admire,
but in reality, it was more of a friendship than anything else. The problem was
I couldn't fall in love with anyone, I couldn't let anyone in."

"Why is that, Jackson?"
the host asked, looking visibly excited by what Jackson was sharing. He was
practically chomping at the bit for Jackson to spill his guts.

"It's because my
heart already belongs to someone else. Long ago, before anyone knew who I was,
I fell in love with a girl who gave me a purpose in life. She was the reason I
woke up the in morning, the reason why I was determined to become a success.
Because I wanted to be worthy of her. It sounds maudlin, but she was truly my
soul mate. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her, but a stupid
misunderstanding got in the way. We broke up, but I never stopped loving her. I
still think about her every morning when I wake up. She's still the last
thought in my head before I fall asleep at night."

Even though I knew
Jackson was acting, my heart felt like it was going to burst out of my chest.
All the feelings that Jackson was describing was what I had thought our
relationship was like. It was the way I felt about him. It was incredibly
painful to hear those words coming out of his mouth, knowing that it was all an
act.

The host leaned in
closer. "Then what happened?"

Jackson smiled
self-deprecatingly. "I'm not usually one to believe in fate, but I can't
believe it was just by chance that we met again. I was at a business dinner
when I looked across the restaurant and saw her. My world stopped. I think I
may have stopped breathing. And I knew then that I couldn't lose her
again."

"And this woman is
Emma Mills? The woman you've been photographed with?"

Jackson nodded, pressing
his lips together before continuing. "I pursued her, but she refused to
have anything to do with me until I broke things off with Candace. Emma was the
honorable one, not me. I couldn't think of anything else besides being with
her. I was impatient and didn't want to wait because Candace was out of the
country preparing for her single to drop. But at Emma's insistence, I waited
until Candace was back in the States and I let her know that we were over. I
think the problem was that I might have been too gentle in my explanation to
Candace. I don't think she understood that I wanted to end things, not just
slow down. It was my fault for not being clearer, but I was trying not to hurt
her."

The host sat back with
a sigh, clearly enraptured with the story. "So that's why she thought you
were cheating on her."

"Yes. Like I said,
it was my fault for not being clearer, but once I realized what people thought,
I had to speak out because I couldn't stand all the things people were saying
about Emma. She's beautiful and kind, sweet and forgiving. I'm going to spend
the rest of my life trying to be someone who deserves her."

"So are you two
together now?"

Jackson smiled wryly.
"I'm trying to convince her to give me another chance. I think all the
publicity has scared her off. She's a very private person and she's not used to
life in the spotlight." Jackson's smile disappeared, replaced with a look
of determination. "I'll give up my career if it means being with her.
Nothing is as important as having her by my side."