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Authors: Carla J Hanna

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BOOK: Loved In Pieces
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“What?! I’
m
insulted. You don’t think I’m pretty?
” I
complained
.


Marie
, you’re skin and bones with
great
boobs. You
’ve become really
thin since Christmas. Please gain
some
weight.”

“Well, your timing sucks. I’m wiped out from forgiving Evan
for
all the gossip sites.”

Evan was behind us and shook Manuel’s hand while I was recovering from the shock of Manuel telling me that I was too thin.


Thanks for dressing up, Man
ny
,
” Evan joked. “
So you two are finally a couple! It’s about time.” He laughed
again and pulled me into a hug and
we
kissed
a Hollywood hello
. “I bowed out
when I realized t
hat I had no chance last summer
. W
hen Marie told me she loved you
in December I knew it was all over.”

Manuel
gave me a very appreciative, loving smile
. “
You told him you loved me?

I smiled back. “Of course; I always try to tell the truth.” I hugged Evan
again
. “Evan
,
Manuel just told me that he thought I was skin and bones. I’m hurt.”

“Well, gorgeous, you’re
too thin
and should gain weight
.” He teased,

You must have missed me desperately.
Everything okay?”

I looked at them in disbelief.
I
always heard
about how impossibly beautiful I was, never that I wasn’t.
“The costuming for
Constantine’s Muse
was just so snug and heavy. I exercised constantly so I wouldn’t be so lonely. I guess I overdid it. I’ll put on some weight.” I changed the subject. “
Evan
,
when did you date
Beth
?”

Evan
held my hand and exhaled
, “
Last fall.
I’m not a cheater but I was in town and saw her a few times
when you were busy
—as friends
.
She’s fantastic,
but
I
f
elt stupid dating someone in high school—and you, my dear, are no high school senior.
I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, but you know how I feel about you.
You don’t
feel the same about me
,
and she’s so special
.”

I shook my head and lowered my voice, not caring if Manuel could hear, “But I do love you, Evan. You said it didn’t matter if we didn’t have sex. You lied.” He didn’t respond immediately, and I added, “And
she was dating Mitch
.

Manuel interrupted, “Not really,
i
t’
s complicated.”

Evan took my hand, “I’m sorry.
I didn’t lie.
I knew you loved Manny more.”

“But he was dating Kate!” I lowered my voice again. “
I feel betrayed
but we’ll talk about it later
.” I switched the subject. “So are you ready for millions of people to watch you for
two hours
?”

“Yep, I can’t control anything. I’m just glad to be able to work.
I feel so lucky to be an
actor.
” He shrugged his shoulders. The project must have been awful to film.

“Do you? I’m so sick of it!”

“Yeah,
I love
it
. It’s a dream come true. I love the challenge, being part of cool projects. I enjoy the people I meet. They’re fascinating, many are geniuses. Sure it’s a business, but an intriguing, interconnected one.”
He put his hand on my cheek
.

We survived our break-up and everything turned out great
for you. It hurt at first but now I’m happy
.

Manuel laughed, “You like the parties, too?”

“Sure. I don’t have to participate. You know my philosophy is ‘everything in moderation, except for moderation.’ It helps me stay professional and let those who participate in the excess weed themselves out of the business so I can build my brand and get awesome roles.”

I laughed, “Like Byron. Poor guy won’t last long.”

“Good, because he’s beat me on the hotness factor,” Evan laughed.
“Thanks for coming, guys.
We
will
talk about Beth later, Marie
.
” He asked Manuel, “
So she’s still dating Mitch
?


Yeah
.
” Manuel explained, “Sorry dude, but t
hey love each other
.
I promise I’ll call
next time
they
break-up
.” Manuel sh
ook
Evan’s hand again.

“She’s young, and I’m patient.
I’m glad she came
,” Evan smiled.

I looked at both of them. It struck me that I was their first choice. I didn’t understand why. Beth was better than me in every way
. She was beautiful, smart, athletic, driven, sure of herself and had more backbone than I did
.
It also confirmed my suspicion that I had to have sex with Manual to keep him
as
my boyfriend. Although
Evan
said it wasn’t required, Renee was right.
It was.

“Love you, Evan. Good job.” I kissed his cheek and
patted him on the back
. He turned and greeted
Matthew
.
I gasped.

Matthew responded, “What the hell is the bitch doing here? Didn’t she try to destroy your career, too? Or was your break-up bullshit?”

Evan looked at Manuel and then at me. I stared at Matthew.
Matthew
glared at me. I felt Manuel’s
body flex. Evan caught Manuel’s
fist
and quic
kly pushed both of us backwards.

Evan whispered, “What the hell? Get a grip
,
Manny.”
He pinched his eyebrows at Manuel and then glanced at Matthew again.

“Oh, Marie, shit.” Evan figured it out. “When?”

“The
Globes.” I whispered, “I’m okay. Sashi stopped the bastard.

“Oh, sweetheart. Damn
, t
he soonest I can see you is after the premiere tours. When’s your graduation?”


Second week of
May.”

“Okay,” Evan assured me, “I’ll be there for your graduation. Sorry I’m never here for you. Thank God you have Manny.”

Evan looked at me soulfully and swallowed. He put his hand on my shoulder and then scowled at Matthew. He whispered, “I have to get back to work. Love you, Marie. Keep her safe, Manny.”

Manuel nodded and grabbed my hand.

Franz appeared and
put more distance
between me
and Matthew
. “Let’s find Beth and Mitch and sit down
—n
ow.”
He took me by the arm and led
Manuel and me
towards the theater. “
Darling
,
ignore him.
You’re okay.”

Betrayal hit me from all sides. I lost yet another piece of me to the spectacle that was my life. I pretended that nothing happened as I put the rest of me in my safe deposit box.

Manuel and Franz studied my face.
My
eyes blurred and body shook.
Only a few tears
fell which Franz wiped immediately.
Manuel put his arm around me, calmed me.
We
found
Beth and Mitch
and took our seats.

The movie sucked but Manuel loved it
. H
e loved mindless action adventure movies with
beautiful girls
who kicked ass. Evan’s movie had two athletic
actresses
who said very little
. Manuel smiled the whole time and squeezed my hand during scenes he liked. I noticed the scenes usually involved blowing stuff up.
My boyfriend charmed me.

~  |  ~   
EIGHTEEN

Manuel put his hand in mine so I’d know he was awake. I searched for his face in the darkness to see his
beautiful
brown
eyes looking at me
through his impossibly long lashes
. He
smiled
passionately
and brushed my hair off of my shoulders
.


It’s April 22.
Happy b
irthday, Marie. You were sound asleep when I got here after work. The dishwasher didn’t show up so I finish
ed
up all the dishes. The manager gave me a bigger percentage of the tips, though, and I got paid hourly for the extra time. I scored,” he chuckled.
While he talked, he traced my lips with his finger.

Manuel like
d
puns. He th
ought he was
clever. I
thought he was
adorable when he
thought he was
clever. Almost all of his puns
we
re sexual. With his friends he cusse
d
before the pun.
With me, he
wa
s more respectful. He
wa
s such a boy.

I used to think I worked so hard that getting paid what w
ould
become
tens of
millions of dollars after royalties for
Jefferson
’s Muse
was
crazy
. Manuel work
ed
as hard as I d
id
and
was
paid $10
an
hour.
Unlike Manuel,
my salary
bought the rights to my
privacy, childhood, and freedom.
Life
wa
s inequitable.

I snuggled into him and kissed his chest, then his neck, and then his wonderful lips.
My body tingled. It seemed that every day my body was getting more aroused when I woke up beside him.
“Thanks for the birthday wishes. I love you so very, very much.”

“As I love you, my birthday girl.” He rolled me on top of him and tickled my sides playfully. I giggled and he rolled me back onto my side, facing me with a big smile on his face.

He whispered,
“I’ve had the best month of my life
. T
hanks.”

“Me, too, Manuel,
” I laughed. “
It
’s
been a month since prom and almost two months from winning my Oscar.
It’s
the most emotional
three
long months of my life.
I’m getting addicted to you sleeping next to me
. Please don’t leave me
.

I kissed him as I got ou
t of bed. “You go back to sleep.

“I’m
not going to leave you,
” he mumbled. “
Have you noticed that you haven’t puked in weeks?”


Yeah, my nausea is still there but it’s way less.
I told you I wasn’t bulimic.
Have a good workout
, and I’ll s
ee you at school.”

I
took a pain killer and
quietly left my house to meet Elise at
4th
Street and Adelaide
Drive
for my workout. The air was heavy, thick from the morning fog
, impairing visibility
. I slowed my run.

My days were long when I
went
to school.  Since most of
my
high school
time
was
independent with tutors, I truly appreciated going to classes.
I felt normal and liked to learn.
I still had to do my workout with
Elise
every weekday, so I did it before school. After school, I studied and did my homework. Then I responded to Sage’s requests or questions.
My publicist handled my social network sites,
respond
ed
to industry friends and acquaintances
, and
maintained
my brand
.

BOOK: Loved In Pieces
9.72Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
ads

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