Lovely (40 page)

So it’s Friday, and the last day of my week of surprises for Cara. Today I have a different partner in crime. Delilah. Her mission is to deliver a note to Cara and stand there while she reads it.

Cara,

Meet me under our willow tree at the reservoir at dusk. I’ll be waiting for you. I hope you’ll come.

I love you.

—Ash

I know this is it for me. This is my last chance to get Cara back. I’m pulling out all the stops today, so I hope it works. I can’t bear the thought of going through another day without her smile, her touch, her warmth. I’m lost without her.

Delilah skips across the parking lot toward where I’m sitting on the bleachers. Skipping is good, right? I hope so. When she finally reaches me, she smiles.

“S-so did she read the note?” I stammer, my nerves getting the best of me.

She’s grinning. “Yes, she did.”

“And? Do you think she’ll meet me?”

Delilah pauses. “Honestly, Ash, I don’t know. I did put in a good word for you, though.”

“Thanks, baby girl.”

She turns to leave but looks back at me with love in her eyes. “And, Ash, she’d be a fool not to come.” She winks and strolls off.

I love my sister.

As soon as the sun starts to dip down into the horizon, I head over to the reservoir. I feel a strange sensation in my gut. I think it’s excitement mixed with nerves and maybe a sprinkle of hope. The ache I feel is still throbbing and my fate is now in Cara’s hands.

I grab my guitar, the picnic basket, the lanterns, and the blanket I brought along and walk over to our willow tree. Spreading the red blanket out on the ground, I set the basket down and light each lantern before I place them in a heart shape surrounding the tree. I strum some notes on the guitar to pass the time and occupy my mind. I look up at the sky, streaks of orange and pink wrapping their beauty around me, consoling me. Small hums of prayer leave my lips as I practice the song I intend to play for Cara.

A melodic voice breaks into my thoughts. It’s the one that zip lines straight to my heart. Cara.

I blink back tears that are threatening to collide with my skin. It’s been weeks since I’ve seen her, touched her, tasted her … but here she is. She’s standing in front of me.
She actually came
. She’s real. And she’s here. My fingers pause on the strings and for a solitary moment, I’m completely still, unable to hear anything but the beat of my own heart … It’s swollen; my love for her filling it to the brink.

She’s like a vision, wearing my favorite yellow dress, the one she wore the first time we made love. Her hair ruffles with the gentle breeze, her gorgeous brown eyes touched by the moonlight, shimmering brightly. I’ve missed her so much.

Her voice spreads warmth through me as she starts to speak. “Ash, I—”

“Wait,” I interrupt her quickly, needing desperately for her to hear the words I wrote. “Don’t say anything. Just listen.” I clear my throat and stare directly into Cara’s eyes, a slow guitar riff floating into the night air.

“Hmmm … Hmmm …

I fell in love with you

Hmmm … Hmmm …

One piece at a time

Hmmm … Hmmm …

First your eyes

Next your smile

Then your heart

Hmmm … Hmmm …

It all adds up

Hmmm … .Hmmm …

To what makes you

Hmmm … Hmmm … .

And I love you

Every piece of you

Hmmm … Hmmm … .

And I love you

Hmmm … Hmmm …

Every piece of you

Hmmm … Hmmm … .

You are beautiful

Hmmm … Hmmm …

Every piece of you …

Hmmm … Hmmm …

And I’m so in love with you

Every piece of you …”

When I finish the song, tears are slipping from the edges of Cara’s beautiful brown eyes and falling from her cheeks like raindrops. I set my guitar down and walk over to her, reaching around and pulling her in for an embrace. It’s almost surreal to be holding her again.

“Shhh, baby, it’s okay,” I say, stroking her hair gently and kissing the top of her head over and over again.

She wipes her wandering tears on my shoulder while trying to speak. “Ash … I …”

I strum my knuckle down the side of her cheek, my body quivering at the simple touch that soothes an ache deep inside of me. I’ve missed the feel of her skin. “You don’t have to say anything.”

She takes a deep breath and holds my eyes to her own. “No Ash, I need to say this to you. I’m so sorry for not trusting you. Deep down in my heart, I believed you, but I was filled with so much self-doubt. I mean, who wants a girl who hides behind fake glasses? Who wants a broken girl? You could have anybody you want, Ash … anybody,” she says, the tears continuing to stream down her face.

I cup her face in my hands, my fingers gliding over her skin to wipe away her tears, leaning my forehead against hers, breathing in the scent that cocoons me. “You’re the only somebody I want, Cara.” Sweeping my lips over hers, I whisper, “you have no idea how you’ve changed me …” I place my hand on her chest, feeling the steady beat of her heart. “You have the most beautiful heart.” I stare into those eyes that drew me in from the first moment I saw her. “I was drowning, Cara, and I didn’t know how far under I was until you came along. You latched onto my hand, and my heart, and slowly pulled me out … you made me want to do more than just survive. You made me want to live. I lost that when my dad died.”

Reaching into my jeans pocket, I pull out her gold bracelet.

Her eyes snap to mine. “You were carrying it around with you?”

“I kept it with me.” I shrug. “I needed you near me.” I reach for her arm and place the bracelet back on her delicate wrist. I slide my finger down her lower lip. “I missed you so fucking much … and … I love you Cara Hayward. Always.”

She looks up at me, tears staining her flawless cheeks. “I love you, Ash. I’ll always love you.” She inches closer and brushes her lips against mine.

I sigh and slip inside to taste what I’ve been missing; it’s glorious.
She
is glorious. We are tongues and lips and love and longing all mixed together … breathing life into one another … She
is
my life. I pull back and wrap my arms around her, nuzzling my face in her neck. She lets out a joyful sigh.

I look up toward the heavens, recalling the words my father uttered to me over the years. “Son, once your life is touched by something so beautiful, you’ll never be the same.”

I didn’t understand it then Dad, but I do now. I really do
.

The sun sneaking through the clouds and the depth of green in the grass actually makes this place bearable. Screw that, there’s only one thing that makes this place bearable, and she’s standing beside me. Cara has her hand around my waist and her head on my shoulder, the warmth of her cheek pressing into my jaw. The wind caresses our faces and gently blows the carefully placed flowers around each grave.

“Do you think he knows we’re here?” I ask Cara in a hushed voice.

“I believe he does,” she says, and with her words, she makes me believe it, too.

It’s always been hard for me to come here, but it’s even more difficult now. Fourteen months ago today Colt passed away from cancer. The tumor in his brain returned and there was little the doctors could do. Unlike the situation with Dad, I got a chance to say goodbye to Colt, and those last few moments with him are ones I will treasure forever … his words, I will treasure forever.

“Dad was your hero … but you were mine,” he whispered hoarsely, and I watched his chest rise and fall quietly as the last bit of air left his lungs.

“I love you, Colt,” I choked out through a flood of tears.

The hand that touched my shoulder while I spoke those words enabled me to let go. The same one that reached in and grabbed my heart from the moment I laid eyes on her. She didn’t just grab it, she stole it, and lucky for me she never gave it back.

After Cara and I graduated, we got an apartment together in Santa Ana. It wasn’t the first choice of either Nadine or my mom, but they eventually got used to the idea because they knew we wanted to be together and that we wouldn’t back down. Cara teaches English at Santa Ana High School, and I put my Economics Degree to good use by getting an entry-level job as an Information Technology Consultant at a firm owned by Charlie’s dad. When I think back to the path my life was leading me to six years ago, I have to smile. It sounds strange to say, but sometimes I think Dad sent Cara to me … like he knew I needed someone like her in my life … just the way Mom needed him.

Someday, I’m going to make an honest woman out of her. There’s no doubt in my mind that I’ll marry this girl. It’s something that crosses my mind often and always puts a permanent smile on my face.

Cara waves a hand in front of my eyes. “Where are you?” she asks with a smile.

I turn to her, my feet digging into the soft grass surrounding us. “I was just thinking about my life … and about you.”

She raises one of her manicured brows. “What about me?”

As my eyes move over every inch of her face, her hypnotic eyes, the curve of her cheekbone, her rose colored lips, her adorable nose … I feel settled. Happy. Content. For the first time in a long time. I reach out with my hands and take her face between them, caressing her cheeks with my thumbs.

“You are that one star in a starry sky that stands out on the darkest of nights; the one you can’t help but look at, be drawn to … the one whose beauty makes itself known by nothing more than just simply existing … You’re my star, Cara. Your smile filled me with hope and your love filled me with life.”

“That’s very poetic of you, Ashton Taylor,” she sings, inching closer to me.

“That’s the effect you have on me, Cara Hayward.” I close the distance between us. “I’m going to kiss you now.”

“Ash … here?” she grins. “Your dad and Colt are watching.”