Authors: Karen Stivali
Sean slammed the minivan door, then rested against it, massaging the back of his neck. “She was hysterical when she called. To hear her describe it, she walked in on a goddamned porn shoot or something.”
“It wasn’t like that.” I shook my head, not believing this was even happening. “Sean, I’m sorry.”
He closed his eyes. “Don’t apologize. It’s not your fault. I understand. But she’s not letting it go.”
“What do you mean?”
He stared at the gravel, then slowly looked up at me. “She’s having her lawyer file papers. She’s suing me for full custody on the grounds that I endangered the kids by letting you and Tanner live here.”
The words stung as they sank in. “I never, we never—”
“Collin, don’t. I know. You and Tanner are great with the kids. Having you here has been a blessing, not a problem. But I can’t lose them.”
I hadn’t seen tears in Sean’s eyes in years, but they were there now. I’d put them there. “We’ll move out. Right away.”
“I wish I could argue with you. I don’t want you to go.”
I held up a hand. “I know. But the kids come first. It’s not your fault. You’ve been great letting us stay here. It never even occurred to me we’d cause a problem for you.”
“Me neither.” He rubbed his forehead. “Where will you go? You haven’t heard from the housing department yet, have you?”
“There was an e-mail update that said maybe by Monday it would be ready.”
“Shit. Do you have some place to stay for the weekend? I don’t want to toss you guys out on the street.”
“Don’t worry about it. Seriously, man, we’ll be fine.”
He nodded. “I better go check on the kids.”
“Tell Tanner I’ll be there in a minute. I’ll make some calls.”
T
ANNER WAS going to be pissed at me. That much I knew for sure. But it didn’t stop me from calling Wendy.
“What do you want?” she said.
I was too relieved that she’d answered her phone to let the snotty tone in her voice bother me. “I need to ask a favor.”
“Are you fucking kidding me? You’ve got a lot of nerve, Collin Fitzpatrick.”
“We’ve got nowhere to live.”
“What?”
“Our dorm’s still not ready. We were staying at my brother’s place, but his wife doesn’t want her kids exposed to ‘people like us,’ so we have to leave. Tonight.”
“She actually said that? People like you?” Wendy’s voice had softened.
“She had a much more colorful way of phrasing it, but that’s the gist of it.”
“Oh. That sucks.” She paused, and I could imagine her arguing with herself over how nice to be about it. “What does this have to do with me?”
“I don’t know if we can even go back to the gym. I think we forfeited our spot when we left. Can we crash at your place? Just for a few nights. They’re supposed to have our building ready by Monday.”
She sighed so loud, her breath whistled through the phone.
Please, Wendy, come on.
“I shouldn’t say yes. I’m still mad at both of you.”
“Shouldn’t? Does that mean you’re saying yes anyway?”
Please-please-please.
This time she blew directly into the phone. “Fine. But only because I won’t be here. I’m heading to Dex’s in a few hours—keep your comments to yourself, thank you very much. I can leave a key for you at the front desk.”
“Thank you. Seriously, you have no idea how much I appreciate this.”
“Yeah, well, be glad I was already going out of town, or I might have said no. And be nice to my roommate. I’ll tell her you guys are desperate. She’s got friends staying over all the time, so she shouldn’t mind.”
“Thanks.”
“How come you’re calling instead of Tanner?” I could tell she was trying to sound nonchalant, but disappointment leaked into her voice.
“It’s my family that’s kicking us out, so I wanted to be the one to find us a new place.” Mostly true. Tanner wouldn’t have called her, though. He’d have slept in a cardboard box in an alley first.
“Oh. Okay. Look, I have to go. Tell the guard I left an envelope for you. And don’t let Tanner eat all my microwave popcorn.”
“I won’t. I owe you one.”
“You owe me more than one.”
I chuckled. “Have a safe trip.”
Now all I had to do was convince Tanner it was a good idea to stay at her place.
S
AYING GOOD
-
BYE to Sean and the kids was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. Not just because they were sad and I didn’t want to leave, but because I wasn’t sure when I was going to see them again. None of us had any clue how serious Laura was about the lawsuit or what the ramifications would be if we had continued contact with Sean and the kids.
“Don’t worry, we’ll see you soon,” I told them as we hugged them good-bye, knowing very well that could be less than true.
As I was getting in the car, Sean stopped me. “It’s not your fault,” he said.
I didn’t know what to say. It might not have been my fault, but there was no questioning that what was happening was due to me. My actions. My decision to be with Tanner. Didn’t that make it at least somewhat my fault? It felt like it did. And that didn’t feel good.
“Stay in touch.” I gripped the car door to keep my hand from shaking.
Sean pulled me into a hug. “I’ll keep you posted. Take care of yourself.”
Tanner and I drove away in silence. As we neared campus, he finally spoke. “Where exactly are we going, anyway?”
All I’d told him was that I had a place for us to stay. “Wendy’s apartment.”
“What?” Tanner’s eyes bugged.
“Before you say anything, yes, she’s okay with it, no, she won’t be there, and I’m sorry, but we didn’t have a whole lot of options.”
Tanner cracked his knuckles, a new habit I’d noticed since we got back from Fire Island. “Let me guess, she’s visiting Dex for the weekend.”
“Yep.”
He shook his head.
I pulled in to the parking lot behind her building. “We’ll make the best of it. Hopefully our room will be ready by Monday like they said.”
“I almost wish Wendy was around this weekend. This whole not talking to each other thing is getting old.”
I knew he missed her. “She agreed to let us stay here. That’s gotta be a step in the right direction.”
“Maybe. I still wish she’d wise up and get Dex out of her life before he hurts her again.”
I didn’t feel particularly qualified to talk about people who hurt other people, considering I’d just gotten my brother into a custody battle. We took a minimal amount of stuff out of the car and headed into the building.
The guy working the front desk had been in my Social Welfare Policy class the semester before. He found the envelope with Wendy’s key in it and signed us into the building. “I’ll register you as guests for the weekend so you can come and go no matter who’s working the desk. Just tell them you’re on the list.”
“Thanks, man.”
I’d been in the Towers before, but hadn’t seen Wendy’s room. The elevator quickly brought us to the eighth floor. Most of the campus-owned buildings were ancient, but this one was only two years old, built by a grant from some wealthy alumnus. The hallway still smelled like new carpeting, and it looked more like a hotel than university housing.
“Here goes nothing.” Tanner knocked on the door.
Giggles sounded on the other side along with some fumbling. When it finally swung open, we were greeted by a tall thin girl with super-curly long black hair, wearing pajama pants and a white tank top with no bra. “You must be Wendy’s friends Tyler and Conner?”
Tanner’s lip twitched, and I could tell he was trying not to laugh. He gave her one of his killer smiles instead. “Close. I’m Tanner, he’s Collin.”
“Oh, well, nice to meet you. Come on in. This is my friend Laney.”
A petite red-haired girl waved from atop a pink bedspread.
“Oh, and I’m Sarah, by the way. Ignore the mess—we were trying clothes on for tonight. We’re having some friends over for Jell-O shots and Truth or Dare. You should come.”
“Thanks.” I took a quick look around the room. I’d thought the Fire Island house got girly with Wendy, Maggie, and Susan. That was nothing. Sarah’s side of the room looked like cotton candy had exploded all over it. Everything was pink, from the trash can to the pictures on the wall to the furry pillows all over her bed.
Laney stopped painting her nails long enough to look Tanner up and down. “You guys can bring your girlfriends.”
My cheeks flushed, but Tanner pulled off another killer grin. “We don’t have girlfriends.”
Laney beamed at him. “Then you both should definitely come.”
“We’ll try,” he said.
For the life of me, I couldn’t tell if he meant it or not. After almost two weeks of Sesame Street and then the blowout with my toxic sister-in-law, maybe he wanted a night of Jell-O shots and giggling girls.
We put our duffel bags on Wendy’s bed. Wendy’s
very narrow
bed. Sarah must have read my mind. “Wendy’s got a sleeping bag in the closet. I’m sure one of you could use that. Unless you make a friend tonight at the party.”
More giggles filled the room.
My head ached, and a deep breath filled with nail polish fumes wasn’t helping.
I nudged Tanner. “You want to grab some food and head to the library? I’ve got a paper due Monday.”
“Me too. We’ll catch you ladies later.”
Laney looked disappointed as she watched Tanner walk toward the door.
“We’ll be here,” Sarah called as she closed the door behind us.
“That’s what I’m afraid of.” Tanner whispered the words into my ear as we walked down the hall.
I laughed, partly because I felt the same way and partly because I was relieved. He seemed as ready to get out of that room as I was. Thank God.
I
T TOOK me four hours to finish writing my paper, probably in part because I kept stopping to check my phone. I’d been hoping for an update from Sean even though I knew that wasn’t likely. It was the weekend, and any more info from his lawyer probably wouldn’t arrive until Monday. I also kept thinking maybe we’d hear something from Housing, but so far, silence.
After I’d saved my document, I went in search of Tanner. He’d finished his work an hour earlier and said he’d be reading in one of the lounges. I found him in one of the alcoves, sprawled on a big couch under one of the heavily leaded windows. An open book lay tented on his chest—Dostoevsky’s short stories. His eyes were closed, those thick black lashes casting shadows on his cheekbones.
I approached slowly, wanting the time to keep looking. Tanner hadn’t had a haircut in weeks. Silky dark bangs fell across his forehead, begging for my fingers to sweep them off his face. Perfect lips, ever so slightly parted, looking desperately in need of a kiss. My gaze passed lower, taking in his long strong fingers as they rested on the book, his narrow waist, slim hips. I struggled to swallow. My cock enjoyed the show with me, not so silently encouraging me to climb on top of Tanner, toss that book aside, grind against him….
Tanner’s eyelids fluttered open, and he shook his head, craning his neck to look around. He yawned and stretched as he sat up. “What time is it?”
“Little after ten.” I sat next to him, needing to be close to him. He smelled warm and sweet. I breathed in, taking in as much of his scent as possible. God, I missed that. Sleeping apart for two weeks had me waking in the middle of the night craving him—his touch, his smell, his taste—all of him.
My thigh knocked into his, and he pressed back against me. “You wanna get out of here?”
I nodded, wanting to be anywhere as long as he was there too.
A light rain had started to fall, so we half jogged to the Towers.
“What do you suppose is going on in Wendy’s room?” I asked as we rode the elevator.
Tanner brushed rain droplets off his backpack. The elevator dinged and opened. “Guess we’re about to find out.”
Wendy’s door was open. Music and voices filled the hallway, and as we approached the room, a purple bra came flying out, followed by the sound of drunken laughter and cheering.
Tanner caught the elevator door just before it closed. “What do you say we go for a drive instead?”
“I say that’s the best offer I’ve had in weeks.”
R
AIN WAS coming down in sheets so fast, I could barely see two feet in front of the car.
Tanner fidgeted in the passenger seat. “I don’t mean to be a pain in the ass, and I learned my lesson about taking off my seat belt in a moving car, but I swear to God, if you don’t pull over soon, I’m gonna die.”
“From what?”
“ACD. Acute Collin Deficiency.”
I laughed, trying to keep my eyes on the road even though I wanted nothing more than to look at him. My fingers ached to touch him, but I forced myself to grip the steering wheel instead.
“It’s not funny. I’m serious.” His voice was deep and lusty.
Pull over,
my cock weighed in urgently.
Here. Over there. Anywhere. Pull the fuck over!
“Hang on, I know a place.”
“Thank God.”
Tanner shifted in his seat, and it took every ounce of self-control I could muster not to reach over and see if he was as hard as I was.
I slowed to make sure I didn’t miss the turnoff in the rainy darkness.
“Where are we going?”
In the distance I saw what I was looking for. An unpaved road cut through a small patch of woods and led to an abandoned barn on acres of land that had been for sale for as long as I could remember.
“There.”
The car bumped on the uneven pavement. As soon as we neared the barn, I cut the lights and pulled behind the old wooden building.
Tanner leaned closer to the window. “Call me a city kid, but that’s one spooky-looking barn.”
Laughter snorted out of me. “Very spooky. And very private. No one drives down this road even when there’s no monsoon.”