Moonlight Murder: An Inept Witches Mystery (6 page)

“
We were drinking,
”
Emily wailed.
“
We thought we killed him.
”

“
He was shot,
”
Hazel said, opening the door. She did not seem amused in the least. Not that Ingrid could blame Emily
’
s aunt. They
’
d barely not gotten arrested for that last murder.

“
Is Autumn here?
”
Ingrid whispered, trying to look past Hazel
’
s shoulder, but the doorway behind was dark, masking whoever was inside.

“
No,
”
Hazel replied.
“
Thank goodness. But Saffron and Kay are.
”

“
Suck,
”
Emily whispered loudly before easing past Hazel.

Kay was one of elders of the coven. Hazel was the leader. But Saffron was one of the most powerful witches the coven had
—
and she was Emily and Ingrid
’
s age. She was all that Hazel thought the two friends should be. In addition to being learned in magic, Saffron was quiet, responsible, and kept to herself, but power glowed from her so brightly even Ingrid could sense it.

“
We brought boozy coffee,
”
Ingrid said bluntly, hoping that the offerings would at least ease the afternoon.

“
And food,
”
Emily added.
“
Naughty, fattening food with chocolate on the inside.
”

“
You should stop drinking entirely.
”
Hazel shooed them inside.
“
But I do like your boozy coffee. Come on, I can sense death on you two. It
’
s like you
’
ve been rubbing up against ghosts.
”

“
Ew,
”
Emily and Ingrid said together.

“
Please make that image leave and never come back again,
”
Ingrid added.
“
We don
’
t deserve to keep coming across murders. We didn
’
t kill Dickhead even though he deserved to be murdered by Emily. And we didn
’
t kill Sheldon even though he was really bugging me.
”

Hazel cleared her throat as she processed that they knew who the victim was and that Ingrid knew him. The elder looked at the two of them as if she could not believe she had been saddled with such idiots. She had, Ingrid thought, a point.

“
I was just leaving,
”
Saffron said. She walked towards the door, looked Emily and Ingrid over carefully and paused.
“
But I can stay if you need my help.
”

“
Kay and I can cleanse their aura,
”
Hazel said.
“
That
’
s a start. You don
’
t need to hear whatever excuses they have for this
…
this
…”

“
There isn
’
t a word for being as dumb as we are sometimes,
”
Ingrid said.
“
Remember when we graduated from college with honors and had life skills?
”

“
No,
”
Hazel and Emily said together.

“
Take baked goods and coffee and never tell.
”
Emily shoved the pink pastry box at Saffron. Emily then turned to Ingrid and added,
“
You were a spoiled housewife who only had to deal with ivory tower types You don
’
t have life skills, you have
…
totally useless, dead in ten minutes of the zombie apocalypse, the first to go down in a horror movies skills. You
’
re the one the hot guy remembers as he slays the zombies. You
’
re the reason for his anger.
”

“
Oh,
”
Hazel said,
“
you are definitely the reason for poor Gabe Tate
’
s anger.
”

“
Shut up,
”
Ingrid replied, sitting down at the bar in the kitchen and laying her head on the counter.
“
I don
’
t want to think about that.
”

“
You
’
re going to have to,
”
Hazel said.
“
Go to the garden and get some sage for the spell.
”

Ingrid looked at Hazel blankly.

“
Are you kidding me?
”
the older woman asked.

“
Um, we just used canned stuff. From the grocery store,
”
Ingrid replied. She caught Emily frantically shaking her head and said,
“
What? You knew we were supposed to use garden stuff? I don
’
t like gardening. Or dirt. Or
…
having to know things.
”

“
You are a terrible witch,
”
Hazel replied.
“
I am honestly shocked that you can do the magic you do. And your coffee magic and shoes and fine lines is expert work. Half the witches in the coven cannot do those spells, but you can. Why?
”

Ingrid shrugged and said,
“
You should just call my mom and tell her your frustration. She needs someone to vent about me with. I can give you her number. She might come at Christmas. Maybe. I have a sister who is good at magic and what not. Mum usually goes there.
”

“
I can
’
t imagine why.
”

Ingrid pretended to wince, but Hazel knew them well enough to not buy it.
“
I
’
ll get the herbs. You two should come outside. It
’
ll be better there anyway.
”

“
Don
’
t you need a full moon?
”
Emily asked
“
That one time we tried, we needed a full moon.
”

“
Are you referring to the time you set yourselves on fire?
”
Hazel
’
s voice was dry, and she didn
’
t spare them a withering glance.

“
Just Emily,
”
Ingrid said, following them outside. “I was fine.”

Ingrid and Emily were placed in the center of a ring of stone. Emily leaned closer and said,
“
I guess they don
’
t need the moon.
”

“
Shhh,
”
Ingrid said with a grin.
“
The doves have ears.
”

“
And magic that works,
”
Emily stage-whispered.
“
They could do things to us.
”

Hazel and Kay ignored them and walked around the circle in opposite directions. They were talking, but in another language. It made Ingrid
’
s head hurt to try to pay attention, so she just stared up at the clouds and wondered how mad Gabe was going to be and if her relationship was over.

Suck, she thought, he was totally going to dump her. He was going to dump her so hard.

“
We
’
re going to have to solve this,
”
Emily said when the chanting was over. Ingrid had to admit she felt better. They were still completely and totally screwed, but she felt more hopeful about it.

“
Your best chance,
”
Hazel said as they returned inside,
“
is to let Gabe solve it and be straight with him.
”

Ingrid winced.

“
They
’
re not going to do that,
”
Kay said.
“
Obviously.
”

“
Hey,
”
Emily replied.
“
We solved Dickhead
’
s murder.
”

“
Ummm,
”
Ingrid said, feeling the lie of that.

“
You survived Dickhead
’
s murderer is more accurate, I would say.
”
Kay replied.
“
I have to go. I suggest that you listen to your aunt. But good luck.
”

She took her bag and an eclair and left. Papa Pandolfi did make wonderful pastries and magic burned a good amount of calories.

“
We can do this.
”
Emily pulled down plates and took one of the chocolate-filled croissants.

Ingrid poured herself coffee. She couldn
’
t eat. She didn
’
t know what to do. All these feelings were not her style. This felt like the old days with her husband, Harrison. She didn
’
t want to go back to being overwhelmed in emotions. She wanted to
spend time with those she loved and nap and enjoy her life.

Damn it.

“
Since I know you are not going to listen to me,
”
Hazel said.
“
I
’
ll just go straight to saying, I agree with Kay. However, you should probably fumble your way towards Kevin Sullivan, Tia Sullivan, and Maria Peters.
”

Emily and Ingrid gasped.

“
Kevin is Gabe
’
s new deputy,
”
Ingrid said.
“
That
’
s too hard. He
’
d know what we were doing. It
’
s not like we can break into his house like we did Autumn
’
s.
”

“
Yes,
”
Hazel said.
“
That
’
s why you should tell Gabe and let him solve the crime. Like he did last time.
”

Ingrid frowned.
“
But if it gets solved right away,
”
she said,
“
Maybe he won
’
t kill me. Or dump me.
”

Hazel frowned, saw Ingrid was serious and said,
“
You cannot bury bodies and expect Gabe to just let it go. But I will say this and mean it. That man is smitten with you.
”

Ingrid sighed. They had buried a body. Cops didn
’
t just get over things like their girlfriend
’
s burying bodies. She laid her head back down on the counter. But, she thought, it might be less of a problem if the crime was solved very, very fast. All doves on deck and whatnot.

“
So, why Tia?
”
Emily asked. She had pulled out her phone and was taking notes.

“
Do you two know anything?
”

“
Coffee,
”
Ingrid replied instantly.
“
Shoes. Vacation locations. Um
…”

“
We
’
re gaining a fair amount of experience with bodies and also different types of cars,
”
Emily added.

“
Emily knows about setting things on fire for booty calls.
”

“
I do not need to know that.
”
Hazel rose and poured herself more coffee.
“
But everyone knows that Tia and Sheldon have been having a fling for years. If Kevin found that out, I
’
d say that he
’
d have a motive. And of course Tia does since she
’
s married and sleeping with Sheldon.
”