Nessa (Broken Sisters #1) (20 page)

"Oh stop being a baby and open your damn eyes Nessa." This comes from my lovely friend Sam who's getting a slap when I can move again. I try again and I get them open a little more. I try to talk but my throat is too dry.

"Water," I manage to croak out.

"We will get you some. Now try to open your eyes again." I do and I manage to keep them open longer but it's still hard. I do it again and they stay open. Everything is blurred but it comes back into focus bit by bit.

Stacey and Sam are beside me looking terrified. "Seriously quit looking at me like I'm going to die," I whisper. "My baby? Shit is my baby ok?" I start panicking but Stacey puts her hand on mine.

"Relax. Everything's fine. It's ok, the baby is fine." Oh thank God I lay my head back.

The nurse comes in and allows me to have a drink. I sit up and feel like I have been run over with a train. My side hurts like a bitch and I feel like my friends are mourning a loss. I'm seriously over this shit.

"Seriously will you guys change your faces before you're stuck like that." I smirk. I probably shouldn't joke but my luck has been that shitty lately, it's begging to be funny. With that thought I laugh which causes me to wince. Shit my side fucking hurts!

"Ha that's what you get," snickers Sam.

"Well if I don't laugh I might cry and lord knows I'm turning into a right moan bag these days," I reply because it's been tough to deal with shit lately. How can one person deal with all this and not break into a million pieces? I feel lost and broken but I need to be strong for the little one growing inside me. I need to just shut it all down and deal with this shit and stop running from it all.

"Nessa I don't even know what to say to you. You are not a moan bag, you have been through shit. It's ok to cry. I wish you would just talk about it." This comes from Stacey who still hasn't taken that damn look off her face.

"Fine let's talk about everything, Stacey. Let's get it all right out there." My voice is still crackly. I might not be able to talk much but hey, I'm going to do this because it seems my friends are finding it hard to deal with too and I love these bitches so it's time.

"You have just woke up after being out cold for a day because you were stabbed by an ex-boyfriend while running from the current love of your life and you really want to get it off your chest now? Just rest, Nessa!" Stacey is seriously pissed now but so am I.

"Stacey I feel like I'm broken into a million pieces and I don't know how I'm going to put myself back together. I am going to try though and I'm starting right now," I whisper shout because my voice is seriously fucked right now.

"What did you see when you came home from school that day?" Sam asks. Straight to the point. Well done Sam. I close my eyes but open them straight away because that image is still so clear.

"I walked in and called out to my mam like I always did. She didn't answer so I went to my room."

I stop talking. Can I do this? I shake my head I have no idea why because it's not doing anything. I have blocked the memory for so long. It's just so hard going back to that moment.

"Just stop Nessa. You're not ready," Stacey states firmly but because Sam said it I know for sure it's something they all want me to share. I've been trying to block it out for years maybe sharing is the way to go so I close my eyes and concentrate.

"I sat in my room listening to music for an hour and she still hadn't come back. I remember thinking it was strange because she was always there when I got in so I picked up my phone and rang her. The sound of her phone came from the bathroom. When I open the door she was lifeless in the bath. I ran to her but the blood was everywhere it was so red, you know, deep red all over the white bath. She was fully clothed and there was no water in the bath."

I need a minute to compose myself. Jesus, this is hard. I feel something touch my hands. I open my eyes and Stacey and Sam are on either side of the bed holding my hands, it makes me feel stronger.

"There was a horrible smell because she was dead a while more than a few hours but I didn't care, I just held her. I didn't care that I was covered in blood. I had just sat there and screamed after about an hour of holding her. I knew I had to tell someone so I rang for help and you know everything after that."

They both gently hug me. When they parted I notice people at the end of my bed—Patrick, Colleen and I'm assuming the lady on the end is Sally. I know they heard because like Stacey and almost Sam, they have tears in their eyes.

Stacey leans down. "We're going to give you some time to talk to your dad. I'm so proud of you and I love you," she whispers in my ear.

I look to Sam as she squeezes my hand and they both leave. I love them. Without them I don't know where I'd be. They have their stories to and when the day comes I'll be there by their side like they have been for me all these years.

"I'm sorry we heard," my dad offers sadly.

"Its fine, it's something I should have said a long time ago. Nearly dying can do that I suppose." I look to Colleen and Sally. "Why don't you introduce me Patrick." I smile weakly.

He nods. "This is my wife Sally and my other daughter Colleen," he whispers. Shit, I never really thought how fucked up this all is for everyone, not just me.

"I'm sorry how I greeted you before Colleen I was pissed at…" I swallow. I can't say his name because that cut hurts more that my actually stab wound. Thankfully Colleen understands.

"Oh yeah, that's fine. My Dad explained what he could. I get it." But then she gets a serious look on her face. "I'm sorry for everything that you ever had to go through and I'm sorry I didn't get the chance to be there because I would love to have you as my sister."

I don't know what to say to that so I just sit there with I'm sure what is a stunned look on my face. Jesus, I'm done with this drama.

I faced that day with the help of my friends. I need to move past all this and I should start with the people in this room.

"Look I just want to say a few thing then I'd really like it if we could move on from all this because I'm really sick of the pity and the sad looks. I loved my Mam very much. She was an amazing woman who cared for me with the love of both parents. I now understand, but don't agree with what she did. I also understand your role and Sally's in it all, but please can we have a fresh start? I can't keep living in the past. I need to move on from it all. Obviously it's not that simple, I do have a little one growing in me and I have been through hell. I just want to forget the bad shit, remember the good, and give this child the life and family they deserve."

Wow, sounds so simple. If only. It felt good to take that step and by the look on my Dad's face he agrees. He comes straight over and hugs me.

"That's fine Nessa. I'm so glad you're ok and we want to help anyway we can."

I wonder. "Do you think you can find me food? I'm so hungry," I beg a little and they all laugh.

"Sure thing hunny. Anything you prefer?" Sally asks. It's the first time she's spoken. "No anything will do. I'm not fussy."

"Ok, I'll go see what I can find," Sally says as she heads off.

Colleen, Dad, and I talk a little. It's very strange but they're nice people. Giving them a chance won't be so bad. Sally brings back food. When I'm done I yawn and Dad suggests they leave and come back later.

I say bye to them all but Colleen comes over to me. "I know it's not my place and I don't want to rock whatever relationship we have but I feel I need to mention that Taylor isn't taken this all so well. he left the hospital yesterday and we can't get through to him. He loves you. I don't know what went on exactly between you two but I just thought you should know." Then she walks out.

Taylor was here? When did he come? How did he know I was here? Actually, how the hell did I get here? What happened to Brandon? Where is he now?

I'm feeling a little frightened so I text Stacey and ask her to come back which doesn't take her long because I get a delivery report and boom she here. "What's wrong babe, you ok?"

"How did you find me and where is Brandon?" I'm panicking and she can see it.

"It's ok. Calm down Nessa. He's in prison, he can't come near you. I didn't find you, Taylor did. When you ran out on him he came to look for you at the apartment and found me unconscious." I go to talk but she puts her hand up. "I'm fine. It wasn't anything serious but Brandon had been there looking for you. When I told Taylor he freaked, practically nearly shook me to death trying to get me and my swollen head to think of where he might have taken you. I guessed right because your Dad rang me and told me they found you. Once I got checked out I went to the family room but he had gone."

Why did he care, he was just using me. Well at least that's what I think. Why else did he hide me away, break my heart, and keep the fact that he lived with my dad all his life a secret.

"I can't believe it or understand why he would do all this," I say confused but she smiles.

"Because he loves you silly. Whatever game he was playing it backfired on him." Good enough for him, the prick.

"Colleen said he left and can't be gotten in touch with. She seems worried."

"Are you worried?" she asks carefully.

"No. I don't care!" I snap.

"Even though he saved your life?" She's pushing it and she knows it.

"Stacey," I growl.

"Fine but I'm not going to lie to you. Jess said he was pale as a ghost and panicking to death when she went to see how you were doing but Sam gave him shit and he left."

Sam, that's not good. I can only image what she said. She lashes out when she's upset. I love that girl but she goes straight for the jugular when her sisters' are concerned.

"Do I want to know what she said?"

"Nope. She told them all off and Jess reckons he thinks you're better off without him."

"That may be true but it's not just me anymore. Maybe it's time he understands that."

I ponder on that thought and decide Taylor needs to explain himself. He may want nothing to do with the baby or me but he better understand that this baby is not missing out on the rest of his family, on our family because of him.

"What are you going to do?" Stacey asks puzzled.

"I managed to tell you all about finding my mam after ten years. I can face Taylor and I'm going to tell him he better get his ass in here and explain himself."

I'm giving it my all now but seeing him is going to be different. I can't handle my feeling around him but I'll do it. I pick up my phone to call him. My freaking hands are shaking as I dial, it rings three times.

"Hello," says a slurred voice. Great he's drunk.

"Taylor you have till tomorrow to sober the hell up and get your fucking ass up to this hospital so we can talk or you never bother me again." I try to sound strong but just hearing his voice killed me a little.

"I'm not going to bother you again anyway," he slurs back at me. Ugh

"Grow up and stop acting like a fucking baby. And call your damn family while you’re at it because they're worried." I hang up without giving him a chance to answer me. I'm freaking shaking I'm so pissed off.

"Are you ok?"

Am I? I don't really know right now. I'm gonna lie anyways. "Yes, I'm fine. I need to rest. Can you stay? I just don't really want to be alone right now."

"Eh duh, like I'd leave you now anyways. Even if you wanted me to leave, I'd still stay," she scoffs, but then turns to me with a seriously face. "Nessa I'm proud of you. Today you showed the strength I knew you had all along, pity it took you being stabbed for you to use it," she laughs lightly.

"I'm sorry I worried you," I tell her.

"Please like any of this was your fault. Now rest. I shall be here when you wake."

With that I lay down I'm so tired I fall into an easy dreamless sleep.

I wake to the rain bouncing off the window of my hospital room.. When I look around the room it's empty. Where has Stacey gone? I sit up to grab my phone but a sharp pain shoots through my side. Shit.

"Take it easy Nessa," Stacey warns as she enters the room.

"Where did you go?" I snap. I don't mean to but the pain is excruciating and I was a little panicked being here on my own.

"I just went to grab a coffee babe. Do you need painkillers? I'll call a nurse." She sounds panicky now. I don't want to take the painkillers, I know they say they won't hurt the baby but considering everything that's happened I don't want to jinx anything.