Authors: Cathy Kelly
she’d run out of words. She slumped down on the edge of
the bath and stared at the floor.
‘Max said the oddest thing to me the other day,’ Vida
said slowly.
Evie looked up. Her every sense quivered, like an insect
with antennae sensitive to the slightest nuance of the
breeze.
‘Really?’
Vida seemed to be considering whether she should say
this or not.
‘I should preface this by saying that I thought the two of
you were getting close when we were in Spain. You spent
enough time hanging around together.’ She smiled at the
memory. ‘But I’m a great believer in letting life sort itself
out. I keep my distance over affairs of the heart. Don’t
interfere, that’s my motto. I also thought you were very
happy with your fiance and that you knew your own heart,
that you’d go to whichever man was the right one for you.’
‘How do you know who’s right for you?’ Evie said
despondently.
‘You just do,’ Vida replied. ‘I knew that Max’s father,
Carlos, was the right one, the same way I knew my second
husband wasn’t the right one. In my heart of hearts I knew it
but I still married him and, honey, you wouldn’t believe how
unhappy Dan and I were. I don’t know if I believe in hell but
I’m pretty sure I went through it during those years.’
‘Why did you marry him then?’ asked Evie, eyes glued
to Vida’s.
She put one of Olivia’s flurry white towels down on the
toilet lid and sat down gracefully on it, facing Evie.
‘We’d been seeing each other for a long time and I was
lonely. He’d been a friend of Carlos’s and I thought he was
being kind to me. He took me to Colorado skiing and to
San Francisco for weekends. I was numb after Carlos died
and Max was in Ireland studying … I guess I still don’t
really know how it happened but one day Dan asked me to
marry him and I said yes. I’d never really seen him that
way, as a husband, but he was a good man and I didn’t
want to end up alone. We got married and that was when
the trouble started.’
‘What sort of trouble?’ asked Evie gently, her mind
taken off her own troubles by this fascinating story of
Vida’s past.
‘Dan was a complete control freak,’ she said. ‘God, I’d
love a cigarette,’ she added, looking around as if Olivia
might have a packet and a lighter lying casually beside the
basin. ‘I used to smoke then and even talking about Dan
makes me yearn for one of my Gauloises. He hated me
smoking but it was the one thing I wouldn’t give up for
him. I did it for your father,’ she grinned, the love apparent
in every line of her face.
‘Dan couldn’t bear me to be out of the house unless he
knew exactly where I was and who I was going to be out
with. Charity work was fine because he was rich and
expected me to be a rich man’s wife and sit on endless
committees with all the other rich men’s wives. But, Evie,’
Vida’s eyes were suspiciously bright, ‘I’d worked all my life
in hospital administration, I couldn’t stop to sit around all
day or go shopping, with the odd committee meeting
thrown in to keep me amused. And Dan hated that. He wanted me to be there when he got home in the evening, the perfect little wife.’
‘He doesn’t sound a million miles away from our own
Stephen MacKenzie,’ Evie commented.
‘Got it in one, honey. I don’t like that man, I can tell
you, and I doubt he’ll ever change.’
‘Olivia says he’s getting counselling,’ protested Evie.
Vida looked surprised. ‘That’s great to hear. I’d be very
happy for Olivia if he does change. She deserves a good
man. Unfortunately for me, Dan would have needed more
than a shrink to change the way he thought. He’d have
needed a brain transplant.’
‘What happened in the end?’
‘After seven years of torture, he did us both a favour by
totalling his speedboat off Martha’s Vineyard. I wasn’t
with him at the time, thankfully, so nobody could blame
me for driving it into the rocks and jumping to safety,’ she
said, her voice raw with irony. ‘Although anyone who
knew us as a couple wouldn’t have been surprised if I had killed him.’
Evie couldn’t help but smile as she thought of her initial
and utterly insane impression of Vida: a glamorous black
widow who married and killed. How terribly wrong shed
been. And how unfair.
‘Do you think anyone in this apartment block smokes
and we could ask them for a couple of emergency cigarettes?’
Vida asked, emotionally worn out by her story.
Normally unflappable, she looked rattled.
‘I’m ashamed of what I was like to you in the beginning,’
Evie said earnestly.
Tish, we’ve gone over that before. It’s forgotten.’ Vida
waved a hand dismissively. ‘It was tough on you because
you loved your mother and because you’re so close to
Andrew. But look how well it’s all worked out now.’
“I didn’t have anything in my life, you see,’ Evie
explained darkly, feeling the need to explain. ‘I needed to
make my father terribly important, I needed somewhere to
go for weekends, someone to fuss over. You can’t fuss over
Rosie anymore: she’s too old. Dad was my project. I could
spend time with him and nobody would think I was
strange because I didn’t have a husband or a boyfriend.
People at work used to ask what I was doing at the
weekend and I could say, “Spending time with my father,
he’s lonely and he needs me”.’ She laughed bitterly. ‘He
wasn’t lonely, I was.’
‘Didn’t that change when you met Simon?’ Vida asked
softly.
Evie shook her head. ‘Not really, to be honest. He went
to his mother’s most of the time and I went to see Dad.
Business as usual. Then you came along and I lost it. I
couldn’t cope. It was the shock of realising he wouldn’t be
there for me in the same way, that I couldn’t drive to
Ballymoreen on bank holidays when everybody else was
with a partner and fuss around him.’
She stopped, remembering exactly when she’d got over
her father’s remarrying: on the very day of his marriage,
the day she’d met Max Stewart. Meeting Max had crystallised
everything in her head. She’d fallen crazily in love
with him and all the pieces of her life thereafter had fallen
into place. Andrew could stop being the focus of her
worries because he now had somebody else to worry about
him - and Evie now had somebody else to think endlessly
about, someone to dream about at night, someone to think
of as soon as she opened her eyes in the morning: Max.
Only he didn’t know how deeply she felt about him, and
now, he never would.
‘You know, I must be losing my marbles,’ Vida said,
getting up and splashing water on her face. Age is a terrible thing. I came in here to talk to you about my son and I’ve got weirdly sidetracked.’ She carefully patted her
skin dry with some tissue paper. ‘I asked Max would he be
around for your wedding because, as you know, your father
and I are having a little party for you before you go on to
your honeymoon, and he said he couldn’t bear to. He’d
rather be in hell than be here for that.’
Evie’s heart leapt.
‘He did?’ she said, her voice barely a whisper.
Vida nodded. Evie didn’t have to know she was lying
through her teeth. Max had said nothing to his mother but
she wouldn’t be much of a parent if she didn’t know he
was crazy in love with Evie Fraser. As it was now plain to
Vida that Evie returned the sentiment, a little fib was a
small price to pay for getting them together.
‘Yes, he did,’ she said fervently ‘He didn’t have to spell it
out for me, Evie. He meant he couldn’t handle being
around while you got married when he wanted to be the
guy in the suit at the altar with you.’
‘You think so?’ Evie could barely talk. Her throat was
overcrowded with frogs.
Vida put her arms around her trembling stepdaughter
and held her close. “I know my own son, Evie. I want you
to be happy and I’m not going to interfere any more than
I’ve done now. But,’ she held Evie away from her, determined
to get one message across for certain, ‘don’t marry
anyone unless you really, really want to. Rings, dresses and
gifts can all go back. Hurt and humiliation go away
eventually. It’s much harder to mend a broken heart ten
years down the road when it’s all gone wrong and the
marriage is over’
Evie bit her lip. You didn’t need to be a rocket scientist
to figure out what Vida was telling her: she shouldn’t
marry Simon.
She knew that herself, of course. She was merely terrified
she’d left it far too late to back out now. The
ceremony was in eight days’ time; the church was booked,
the reception too, and the honeymoon. Sixty people had
bought new outfits, borrowed hats, organised babysitters
and arranged to meet other friends, planning who’d be on
taxi duty that night when they were all plastered and
incapable of driving after celebrating Evie and Simon’s
marvellous wedding.
How could you cancel all that? And how could she ever
tell sweet, trusting, anxious Simon that she wasn’t going to
marry him after all?
Picking the venue was hell. People picked special places for
special moments and this was definitely a special moment,
unforgettable really, so she had to.pick somewhere special.
Somewhere he could cry if he wanted to; somewhere she could cry. Evie thought of the restaurant where Simon had taken her to propose. At the time, she’d wished he’d put a
bit more thought into the choice of venue. They’d had the
Early Bird menu, she remembered, and a child at a nearby
table had driven them mad screaming for fish and chips.
God, it all seemed like a million years ago. Had she really
said she wanted to marry Simon then?
Evie sighed. What Vida had said last night was the truth:
there was no other way. She had to call the wedding off.
‘I don’t think we’ve got the money to be buying paintings,
Evie,’ Simon said when she phoned and asked him
would he like to take a stroll around Merrion Square and
look at the marvellous street gallery that appeared there on
Sundays. Come rain or shine, every Sunday the railings
around the pretty garden square were hung with oils and
watercolours, big, small and indifferent. The artists sat on
deckchairs and talked among themselves while people meandered along, looking at oils of desolate Western landscapes and bright pictures of Dublin’s Georgian doors.
Evie used to take Rosie there on Sundays when she was
younger. It was fun and it was free, ideal for a broke single
parent.
She’d never gone to Merrion Square with Simon. The
place held no memories of them, which was why she chose
it. Probably neither of them would ever want to go there
again afterwards.
‘I’ll meet you there,’ she said, trying to finish the phone
conversation.
‘What would you want to meet me there for?’ he asked.
‘I’ll drive us.’
She panicked. They had to go there in separate cars so
they could go home separately. There was no way she’d be
able to cope with sitting in the car with Simon after she’d
told him the wedding was off.
‘No! I’ve got to go to Olivia’s afterwards,’ she said
hurriedly.
‘I don’t know why you’ve got this fancy to go to Merrion
Square all of a sudden,’ he grumbled. ‘There’s a special on
Sky One about the FBI and serial killers.’
You’ll probably turn into a serial killer yourself with rage
after I tell you the news, Evie thought sadly as she put
down the phone. She wished she didn’t have to do this,
wished it with all her heart. But she had to.
She parked her car at the Mount Street end of Merrion
Square as arranged and sat waiting for Simon to drive up.
Her heart was thumping along with nerves and her palms
were sweaty. Celine Dion was sweetly singing ‘Think
Twice’ on the radio, begging her lover not to end it. Evie
switched the radio off.
She should have had a drink or a tranquilliser or
something, anything, to help her through this. Simon was a
lovely, kind, decent man and he didn’t deserve this. She
was a bitch and a cow. She deserved to he sent to prison
for hurting …
‘Evie, are you staying there all day?’ Simon yelled in
through the wound-up window.
They joined the procession of people strolling around
the square.
‘I don’t like these type of pictures,’ he whispered to her
as they passed some modern oils, vibrant slashes of colour
painted thickly on huge canvases.
Evie barely saw the paintings. All she could see was a
horrible vision of the church where they’d intended to get
married, full of flowers and people, with Simon standing
open-mouthed at the altar.
‘If you want to buy some paintings for the house, I
don’t think we have the money,’ he added apologetically.
‘Budgets will be tight for quite a while. Of course, my
mother wants to get us something special and if you saw