Out of Time (Face the Music Book 3) (7 page)

Her father sighed. If he started on about family honour she was going to walk behind his chair and see if Grandmother was there with her hand up his butt.

‘Have a nice ride. I will tell my mother that you are going to celebrate Australia Day with your Australian friends.’

‘I am Australian. I was born here, just like you.’ She didn’t get involved in the Indian community and she couldn’t care less about going to church and getting her name checked off.

He frowned, but she didn’t give him a chance to argue. As she left she reminded herself that he was doing this because he loved her. He wasn’t meaning to smother her. However, getting out of the house and away was like shedding a heavy coat.

Once on the road she was able to push aside everything else. They had agreed to meet halfway between his mother’s house and hers at City Beach. It wasn’t ideal as it was a ten-kilometre ride to get there, but it was a start. Because she didn’t want to get too sweaty, she didn’t push it too hard.

When she got to the hotel where they were meeting, he was already there. She should’ve ridden faster, instead of making him wait. Seeing him, her cheeks heated and it had nothing to do with getting exercise.

‘Sorry I’m late.’

‘I was super early.’ He glanced away. ‘Didn’t want you to see me half dead from the effort of getting here.’

She laughed. He didn’t. He didn’t look that out of shape, and she was glad he’d kept his end of the deal. He was wearing a lime green shirt and darker green leggings that were moulded to all the right places.

Eyes up, Ava.

‘Did you want to head down to Scarborough?’ They could’ve ridden north, closer to her home, but if he was only just getting back into it was kinder to offer him the easy option.

He glanced at her for a moment before nodding. ‘I can’t believe I let my riding fitness slide.’

‘It won’t take much to get it back.’

‘Just time.’ Then he got back on his bike and led off.

She followed. Still not entirely sure what she was doing or what he was doing. Even on the phone he’d been hesitant. Was she being pushy? He’d asked for her number … yeah, but the whole situation was weird. She’d never been in this situation before and she couldn’t help wishing that she’d met him under different circumstances.

When they finally made it to Scarborough Beach it was busy. People had already claimed their spot on the sand and were settling in for a day on the beach. Sitting on hot sand in the sun was not her idea of fun, and she ended up even browner, not burned.

They found a place to chain the bikes and Mike took a moment to rearrange himself and then attempt a stretch. He was definitely not used to riding, but she was definitely enjoying watching him.

‘You going to make it home after this?’

He nodded, but he was grimacing. ‘I need ice-cream and a sit-down in the shade.’

That was more like it. She was glad he didn’t want to sit in the sun. They walked to the shop and bought cones and then found a patch of grass that had a small piece of shade.

They weren’t the only neon Lycra wearers out. She leaned against the tree and stretched out her legs. He did the same, wincing. Their shoulders were touching.

Or rather, her shoulder was touching his arm. When she glanced over he was concentrating on his chocolate ice-cream. His hair was pulled back into a neat bun that coupled with the beard didn’t look girly at all. Had he trimmed his beard?

Probably not for her … maybe for her. Her heart did a stupid happy patter.

His gaze slid to her and he gave her a small smile. She was sure he knew she wasn’t eyeing up his ice-cream, but he acted as though that was all it was. ‘Good?’

‘Yes.’ She gave her ice-cream a lick to prove the point and to stop it from dripping all over her hand. It was nice to be out and doing nothing. She could quite happily sit here with him and say nothing. But that wasn’t the reason she’d asked him to come for a ride. When she saw him at the hospice he always seemed fragile. Out here he didn’t and she was reluctant to raise it. So she didn’t, at least not directly. ‘Your mum says you’re going away soon.’

Ava watched him pause. A noticeable halt as if she’d just pinched him. She shouldn’t have said anything; or at least they should’ve talked about the weather or the cricket first.

‘Yes … I’m not sure about it.’

She could understand that. ‘Oh, she spoke as if it were all worked out.’

‘She would.’ He exhaled and turned away to look over the beach. ‘She’s organised everything, all I have to do is stand around and wait for the inevitable. She didn’t tell me until a month ago. And since then it’s like she’s been working through a checklist and I have no idea what I’m supposed to be doing. It’s like she wants me to just get on with it as if nothing is happening. And I don’t think I can. I can’t. I don’t know how.’ He looked at her with that lost look clouding his brown eyes.

‘There’s no right way to deal with it.’

‘I feel shut out. And then I feel like a tool for making it about me.’

‘Have you told her?’ Her ice-cream dripped onto her hand and she licked it off. The heat was working faster than she was.

Mike shook his head. ‘I can’t. If this is what she wants then I’ll do it.’

‘I don’t think she intended on shutting you out. When she talks to me it’s clear how much she loves you.’

‘I know she wants me to go. I want to go. I hate admitting that. But I like not being there. I don’t want to think about it all the time.’

She could take the hint. ‘Then why don’t you tell me what you’ll be doing over east. Do you have a good rotation?’

He frowned.

‘At the mine—isn’t that where you’re going? She said you had an opportunity you couldn’t pass up.’ From the look on his face she had jumped to all the wrong conclusions.

Then he smiled and shook his head. ‘I needed some extra money so I’m moonlighting as a sparky. Well, it’s my trade but it’s not what I actually do.’

Ava raised one eyebrow. She’d bite. ‘What do you do?’

‘I’m the drummer in Selling the Sun.’

Selling the Sun was obviously a band. That hadn’t been what she’d been expecting him to say. She didn’t know what she’d expected. His mother hadn’t said anything or given any clues.

‘Your mother said you played the piano.’

‘I do. I got to grade five before I stopped sitting the exams. Most of the piano on the album is me, but people see me as just the drummer.’

Ava pulled out her phone and did a quick one-handed search as she finished her ice-cream.

‘You don’t believe me.’ He took a few bites of his cone and then it was gone. He licked his fingers clean.

‘It’s not that I don’t … it’s more of a case of I don’t know the band.’ She glanced up at him. ‘Sorry.’

He shrugged. ‘We’re still small.’

On the album cover he had no beard, his hair was shorter and he looked younger. She flicked through a few more pictures, not stopping to read the articles. ‘That’s very cool. What are you doing when you go away?’

‘A couple of gigs and recording the next album.’

Her mouth popped open. ‘Really?’

He nodded.

‘That is
so
cool.’ She’d just been for a bike ride with a rock star. Her grandmother would have conniptions for the rest of the year. The idea was enough to make her grin.

Then she realised exactly what it all meant. His mother was dying and the timing couldn’t be worse. Her smile fractured. ‘When do you leave?’

‘I’m supposed to leave in four weeks.’ He was staring at the water again as though he didn’t want to face it.

Supposed to.

His mother wanted him to.

‘I want to go. I love what I do … and then I feel selfish for wanting to go on and do that stuff.’

‘It’s not selfish.’ She placed her hand on his arm. His blond hair tickled her palm. ‘You are allowed to live. She wants you to live.’

‘I can’t get my head around it. It doesn’t matter what I do, it feels wrong.’

‘There’s no right way, just the way that works for you and Irene.’

He sighed. ‘I had counselling and all that the first time around. I know all of this. I’ve heard it all before.’

‘It’s okay to need to hear it again.’

***

Mike glanced at Ava. He was sure he’d listen to anything she said because he didn’t feel like he was saying the wrong things around her. She wasn’t expecting anything from him, and that was a relief.

He looked at his legs now sticking out in the sun. If he was going to ride regularly he should shave them—but only them as that would give Dan a laugh and something to bitch at—if he came off it would make the gravel rash a little less severe. Then he looked at her legs, also in the sun. Her skin was already golden. His gaze drifted up to her knees, then her Lycra-wrapped thighs. He wanted to do more than talk.

Fallback position where no thinking was required. He gave himself a mental shake and looked at his feet instead. He was enjoying her company and he didn’t want to fuck it up by attempting to sleep with her. This was different.

Yeah. He was sober and making conversation.

Except that now things had gone quiet.

‘I don’t want to push, I just thought if you needed to talk …’

‘I appreciate it. I enjoyed this morning.’ He meant that and he knew there would be no hangover and regrets. ‘Thank you for suggesting it.’ It had been exactly what he’d needed. To get out and do something different. That Ava was with him had been a bonus.

‘Me too. Most of my friends have given up riding. They drive to work and pay gym memberships.’

‘Do you ride to work?’

‘No. I still live at home and that’s too far away. I’m going to look at some places this afternoon.’

‘There is nothing quite like the freedom of moving out.’ He rummaged through his backpack looking for his drink bottle, hoping he might have some old sunscreen in there too. He found the drink bottle, failed with the sunscreen, so crossed his legs to pull them out of the sun. It already had bite.

She tilted her head. ‘I didn’t realise you had.’

‘I moved back in. My place is in East Freo, but a friend is staying there. I’m at Mum’s.’ Would he always refer to it as her place, even after? He knew in his heart she was never coming back, but his mind still didn’t want to accept it and make plans. He didn’t want to jump ahead.

‘Ah.’ She nodded. ‘I’m looking forward to it. My sister is jealous even though I’m only looking at renting a room in a share house.’

‘Renting just a room?’

‘It’s cheaper than a whole house. Plus I don’t need a whole house.’ She plucked at a few blades of grass. ‘My grandmother is very Catholic and very nosy. I can’t deal with it any longer.’ She gave him a sideways glance.

Was he supposed to read between some lines there? If so, he didn’t know what the lines were. ‘She lives there too?’

‘My father is the oldest of her boys and after my uncle moved to Sydney, she moved in with us. I think he went to Sydney deliberately.’

‘And your grandfather?’

Her lips twisted into a bitter smile that made her face hard and unforgiving. ‘He was an Aussie doctor. They met and married, she moved to Australia, had two kids and he left her for a blonde nurse. She has a deep distrust of Aussie men. And has dedicated her life to trying to find me and Rose suitable Indian husbands.’ She bit her lip. ‘That was probably more than you needed to know.’

It was good stuff to know. ‘My father took off when I was five. I don’t remember him. Shit happens. Ed, also in the band, his folks have been together forever. Gemma’s parents have just split up. I’d rather make my own choices and live with it than do what someone else wants.’

Which was part of the problem he was having. His mother had taken away all the choices. She wanted him to go. Whatever he did he was going to have doubts and regrets. But
he
wanted to be able to make that choice.

Ava gave a nod. ‘That’s how I feel. She has no right.’

‘What do your parents say?’

‘My mother is in a difficult position. She should defer to Grandmother but it’s her house. It’s creating friction, which Grandmother loves. It’s her version of TV.’ She winced. ‘I sound like a bitch. I am being a bitch.’

‘I won’t judge you if you don’t judge me.’

‘Group therapy.’

Half a laugh slipped out. ‘Yeah. We can meet once a week to ride and complain.’

‘Therapy means doing more than complaining. We have to do something.’

Mike frowned. ‘Okay. I’ll talk to Mum about feeling shut out.’

‘I think that’s a good idea. And I am going to concentrate on finding somewhere else to live.’

‘That doesn’t solve your arranged marriage problem.’ He couldn’t believe that happened in Australia.

‘It’s not an arranged marriage … more like forced introductions.’

He raised one eyebrow. ‘That would be weird.’

‘You have no idea.’ She shook her head and sighed, but she was smiling.

‘Do you date them?’ As soon as the words left his mouth he knew he shouldn’t have said them. ‘That was none of my business.’

‘Most of the time, no. A couple have been okay, but after a couple of dates if there’s no chemistry, why bother? Plus I resent the idea that I have to marry someone she approves of.’

‘I wouldn’t make the cut.’ He was not boyfriend material. Hadn’t been for a while. Couldn’t be right now either.

Ava was the kind of girl that he had liked dating—smart, fun and easy to be around. Somewhere on the east coast he’d lowered his standards and ditched dating and relationships for sex. It had seemed like a good idea at the time. He’d liked his previous girlfriends, but breaking up with them had never messed him up like Dan so he’d probably never loved them.

‘Definitely not. But the look on her face would be worth millions.’ Ava laughed, but her gaze was on him as though she was measuring him up. ‘I just want my own space and the chance to fill it as I see fit,’ she said after a moment.

He’d always been able to do that. Right up until his mother got sick the first time. After that everything changed and while sometimes he wondered what his life would’ve been like if he’d got on that plane, for the most part he was glad he hadn’t. Even when things weren’t going well, Selling the Sun was a good job. Fun. Though the pay wasn’t great at the moment. He was glad he’d ignored his mother’s wishes that time and stayed; while at the time he’d hated the change in plans, it had all worked out. For the better, he liked to think. One door closes and all of that.