Restless Hearts (4 page)

“So you say.” Aidan had looked at him with knowing eyes. “But remember, this is Letitia Wilkerson we’re talking about. “She always gets what she wants.”

Jamie and Aidan had been friends for many years. They’d grown up together, and discovered women together, and sometimes Aidan knew him a little too well. His friend had the innate ability to get to the heart of the matter with a few well-chosen words. A useful skill in many instances, but there were times when Jamie would just as soon have avoided the truth... like the truth about Letitia.

His friend took another drink and stared into his glass as though wondering where the brandy had gone. Every once in a while, when Jamie least expected it, Aidan’s vulnerability showed, and he was reminded of what his friend had lost, and the emotional scars he carried to this day. No one else was ever witness to the pain in Aidan’s eyes and Jamie glanced away, hiding the sympathy he felt for his friend.

“Not this time she won’t.” Jamie stood. “Are you sure you won’t come with me? The ship leaves from Boston four days from today.”

A flash of something resembling interest crossed Aidan’s face, and then the old, devil-may-care facade slipped back into place.

“Some other time, my friend, but thank you for the invitation.” Aidan tried to bow while seated and almost fell from his chair.

Standing here now as the weather started to close in, Jamie smiled at the memory. Aidan could be boorish and annoying at times, but he was a loyal friend, and he would miss his company... one of the few things he would miss about New York.

Sarah was relieved when Anna Taylor recovered from her sickness and appeared on deck a few days later. Within a week, passengers and crew had settled into a comfortable routine, and almost every day Sarah gave silent thanks that she’d been lucky enough to find passage on
WindSprite.

Living in Boston, stories about ships captains abounded. Perhaps only the worst stories were repeated, but there were too many reports of mistreatment of crew members to be ignored. Here on
WindSprite
, Captain Johnson demanded high standards from his sailors, and yet their respect for him was evidenced by their actions, plus their cheerful dispositions. With little to do, she spent an hour or two with Melissa every day, allowing her mother time to rest. Anna had thought to bring some children’s story books, but after several weeks, Sarah knew the stories by heart, and she feared that her reading lacked her former enthusiasm.

A couple of pages before the end, Melissa would start to fidget. “Read it again, Sarah. Please.” Sometimes she wondered if the youngster even heard the stories. She looked up to find Jamie smiling at her. When the weather was favorable, which was most of the time, they had fallen into the habit of spending the few hours after supper on deck, judging the quality of the sunsets. She’d confided in him that the storytelling was becoming tedious, and that she was casting about for other ways to amuse the young girl.

Melissa tugged at her arm and she reluctantly tore her gaze away from Jamie. Sunset was several hours away, and she was already looking forward to that magical time of day.

“I’m sorry, Melissa. I promised the cook I’d help him this afternoon.”

“Mr. Reed?” The child smiled brightly. Levi Reed had not only fed the passengers well, he’d completely charmed the young girl with his fanciful stories of sea monsters.

“Yes. I’m going to help him bake some pies.” She re-tied Melissa’s hair ribbon. “Do you like apple pie?”

The child nodded.

“All right then. Go to your mother while I go below and help Mr. Reed.”

* * *

“Do you believe what they say?” Levi peeled and cored apples while Sarah rolled out pastry. “My mother used to say that people with cold hands produce the best pastry.”

Sarah didn’t look up, but she nodded. “Mine says the same thing.” She transferred the sheet of pastry to the baking dish. “When I was small, I’d watch her bake pies. She was admired for all of her baking, but her pies were in demand for every social event. When I close my eyes, I can see her hands.” She paused for a moment, lost in thought. “By the way, thank you for allowing me in your kitchen. I’m accustomed to being active, and I’m finding the pace of life on board positively glacial.”

“Soon you might find it too hot to do much of anything. We’re reaching the southern latitudes.” He filled the baking dish with apples and passed it back to her for the top crust. “It’s a rare voyage when we aren’t becalmed once or twice.” He brightened. “Although that’s often followed by a storm. Cools us down a treat, and we collect all the fresh water we can.”

Sarah stepped back and admired the remaining pies. Three pies were already in the oven, sending mouth-watering smells drifting throughout the ship. “How many days do you think it will take for us to get there? I’ve heard so many different estimates.”

The ship went into a long, slow roll and Levi rolled with it. Sarah braced herself against the edge of the table.

“Hard to say,” he said. “Four months is good time, although we’ve done it in less. We don’t have the speed of the new clippers.”

“I’ve heard some of the new ones are setting records.”

Levi shrugged. “Yes, but
WindSprite
isn’t far behind, and the captain knows how to handle her. It all depends on the weather.” He grinned at her. “But you, being from Boston, would know that.”

She acknowledged his comment with a nod. “It’s difficult to live in Boston and not absorb a certain amount of knowledge about the sea. But my main interest has always been medicine.”

“Medicine?” He frowned.

“Yes,” she continued. My father’s medical practise was in our home, and he allowed me to help him.” She waited for the usual expression of dismay, but saw none.

“I would imagine you were quite a help to him. You have competent hands.”

Sarah found herself blushing, something she rarely did. “Thank you.” She decided not to bore him with the tale of her failure to attend medical school. “It’s a fascinating subject.”

“And your husband is a doctor. You’ll be able to assist him, as well.”

For a moment she didn’t grasp what he was talking about, then she recovered. “Yes. Devon and I make a good pair.” Now that she was getting to know her shipmates better, she was finding it increasingly difficult to perpetuate the lie. But she had no other choice.

“Thanks again for allowing me to help. I enjoyed it.”

“I did as well.” Levi grabbed a handful of his apron and prepared to remove the first pies from the oven. “I’ll see you at supper.”

* * *

“The pie was good.” Sarah and Jamie strolled on the deck after supper.

Sarah acknowledged his compliment with a small smile. “It felt good to be doing something. I enjoy making bread as well, but I don’t want to impose myself. It was generous of Levi to allow me to trespass in his kitchen. And what did you do today?”

“I spent some time with the captain, but other than that it was the usual routine.”

Sarah studied the colorful sky as the sun dove toward the horizon. “A nice sunset, but not the best we’ve seen.”

“Hmmm.” He sounded distracted and she looked up to find him studying her. His gaze lingered on her face, then he broke away to study the sunset. Instead of bothering her, she found his interest exciting. What would it be like to be with a man like Jamie? Someone whose masculinity was palpable. It was becoming more difficult to spend time with him, especially in these quiet evening hours, when they were usually alone. She was beginning to fantasize about touching his face; she wanted to feel the coarse stubble on his chin.

“So what do you think?”

“I beg your pardon?” She snapped out of her reverie.

His eyes sparkled as though he’d read her thoughts. “The sunset. Shall we rate it an eight?”

She tore her gaze away from his lips. “I give it a seven tonight. Let’s save the big numbers for something truly spectacular.”

Jamie frowned, as though trying to determine if there was a double meaning behind her words. “Agreed,” he murmured. “It can only get better from here.”

* * *

In spite of the difference in their ages, a solid friendship developed between Sarah and Lucy. Sarah cherished the older woman’s wisdom, and knew that such closeness would have been unlikely back in Boston. As the ship sailed into the southern hemisphere, Lucy passed her time working on an endless supply of embroidery projects, and tried to teach Sarah, but her efforts lacked consistency and Sarah eventually threw up her hands in despair. “I’m wasting your precious embroidery thread,” she said as Lucy cast a critical eye at her work. “I doubt that embroidery thread is something that will be available in the stores when we get there.”

“You make a good point.” Lucy took back the proffered thread and the needle and tucked them away carefully. “Although I daresay you can stitch up a sliced finger as neat as you please.”

“That I can do.” Sarah glanced toward the ship’s rail, where Jamie was supervising Melissa as she attempted to fish. The weather had grown colder the past couple of weeks and Sarah knew that their days outside were numbered.

“He’s a handsome man,” observed Lucy, but her attention remained on Sarah.

Sarah watched as Jamie leaned over the child, showing her how to hold the fishing pole. “Yes,” she sighed, and in that moment, she decided to tell Lucy the truth. She turned to confess her deception, but from the look in Lucy’s eyes she could tell that the other woman had already guessed the truth.

“You’ve figured it out.” Sarah held the other woman’s gaze.

Lucy nodded. “But I’d like to hear it from you.”

Sarah glanced around to make sure she couldn’t be overheard. “It feels so good to finally tell you this, Lucy. I’m not married, and I’m sorry I pretended otherwise.” She shifted her position so she could look directly at the other woman. “I didn’t see how I could possibly make the trip as a single woman.”

Lucy raised her eyebrows, but remained silent.

“You see...” Sarah plucked a piece of embroidery thread from her skirt. “...everything changed for me on Valentine’s Day, when my fiancé and I decided that we didn’t love each other enough to go through with marriage.”

“A wise decision.”

Sarah looked up, startled. “Do you think so?”

“I wouldn’t say so, otherwise.” Lucy’s tone was matter-of-fact.

“No, of course you wouldn’t.” Sarah continued her explanation. “Fortunately for me, my mother understood when I told her I wanted to get away. She helped me plan everything right up to my escape.”

Lucy set down her embroidery. “Your escape?”

Sarah frowned. “I’ve made it sound more dramatic than it really was. But mother and I both knew that I couldn’t leave when my father was around, so we managed to book passage on this ship which was scheduled to depart while father was in New York at a medical conference.”

Lucy picked up her embroidery again. “That’s right. You told me your father was a doctor. Is his name Devon?”

“No, that’s my brother’s name.”

“Another doctor?”

Sarah laughed. “Not a chance. My father was greatly disappointed when Devon told him he wasn’t interested. No, Dev still hasn’t decided what he wants to do, although he’s working now at a ship’s chandlery.” She paused to think. “He could probably be very good at it if he tried.”

A squeal of delight came from the ship’s rail. Melissa had hooked a fish. Lucy’s face softened as she watched Jamie with her. “He’s attracted to you. You must be aware of that.”

Jamie hauled in a small fish which flopped on the deck. “Yes,” she said. “But I’m hoping you’ll keep my secret.”

Lucy considered her request for a few moments. “For the time being. But when we get to California, you might find it helpful to have a male friend. I hear it’s a rough place, and that’s putting it mildly.” She tilted her head. “Not to be indelicate, but do you have enough money?”

“I hope so. My grandmother left me some money, and my mother went to New York and sold some valuable jewellery that she’d inherited.” She thought of the money tucked away in her trunk. “I’m not afraid to work, and in the meantime I’m sure I have enough to get established.”

“We shall see.” Lucy shoved her work into a carpet bag as Melissa came running over with her fish.

“Yes,” murmured Sarah. “We shall see.”

* * *

After supper that night, the captain turned serious as he looked at each of his passengers in turn. “You saw me exchange signals this morning with that frigate.”

“What was that about, Captain Johnson?” Sarah had been curious all day.

“We exchanged latitude and longitude. Passing ships do that from time to time as it’s an excellent way to confirm our position. He doubled the Cape three weeks ago.”

It was difficult not to shudder. Doubling the Cape was the most dangerous part of the voyage.

“He’s sailed this route most of his life, and he informed me that the weather is particularly foul this winter. So I’ve decided to follow his example and double the Cape instead of chancing the Straits of Magellan.” He looked around at the adults. “I’ll give you a day’s warning, and you’ll need to put away any loose items in your quarters. The seas can become violent, as we’re here in the middle of their winter.”

Anna Taylor let out a small whimper.

“Mrs. Taylor, perhaps you and your daughter should stay in your cabin as much as possible. The steward will bring your meals.”

“How long?” she asked, eyes wide.

“It’s hard to predict. Somewhere between a week and two weeks.” He paused. “I did it in eight days the last time, but the weather was far nicer than what we’ll have this time.”

“I’ll help with Missy.” Sarah wondered if she’d regret the spontaneous offer.

“As will I.” Jamie spoke kindly. “Don’t worry, Mrs. Taylor. After this, it’s clear sailing all the way to California.”

The captain frowned at him, but said nothing. Jamie shot a grateful look in the captain’s direction, and the discussion was over.

“Did you mean that?” Sarah asked the next morning as they caught a breath of fresh air on the deck. “About clear sailing all the way to California?”

Jamie looked guilty. “I have no idea. I shouldn’t have said that, but the poor woman needed something to hang on to.”

Sarah nodded her agreement. “You did the right thing.” She looked at the darkening sky. “I think we’re all going to need support.”