Secrets On Lake Drive (31 page)

“Are you ready to go, baby?” Sean walked
over to the couch and extended his hand to me. I clutched it and he
pulled me up. Just as he did, Roman came in with Victoria’s glass
of water. “We’re taking Roman with us, so you don’t have to stay
around here if you don’t want to, Ma.”

“Alright. Y’all have fun.”

“Bye, Grandma.”

“Bye, Roman. See you later.”

We started off the day by eating breakfast,
then we went to Mayfair Mall. Sean wanted to do some shopping for
Roman and I did a little shopping myself. We had lunch around
one-thirty, then we went back to Sean’s house.

I laid Roman on his bed so he could take his
daily nap, and while he slept, Sean and I got comfortable
downstairs on the couch. We actually fell asleep in each other’s
arms. It was a long day after all.

I woke up at about six o’clock. My movement
made Sean open his eyes.

“Ah, man. What time is it?” he asked.

“It’s about six.”

Sean rubbed his eyes. “It’s been a long day,
huh?”

“Yeah, but I enjoyed every second of it with
you.”

My words made him smile. Then he leaned over
and kissed me. “Do you want some dinner?”

“No. I’m still stuffed from lunch.”

“Ah’ight. So what now? The night is still
young. If you want to do something, we can drop Roman off by
Derrick’s house.”

“Actually, I think I’m ready to go home. I
have some things I need to get done before I go to bed.”

“Oh, ah’ight.” I could see the
disappointment in Sean’s face. He was ready to kick it some more.
“Let me get my keys.”

I went upstairs to wake Roman so we could
leave. It was a quiet ride to my apartment. Sean didn’t say a
single word to me and Roman had fallen asleep in the back seat.

When we arrived in front of my apartment, he
asked, “So am I going to see you tomorrow or what?” He didn’t even
look at me – just kept his head straight as if he was still
driving, but he had already parked.

“Sean, what is it? Are you mad because I was
ready to go home?”

“I would’ve liked to spend more time with
you, but it’s all good. I’ll call you later, ah’ight?”

“Yeah. Okay.” I got out of the car and
didn’t kiss Sean or nothing. He drove off after I was safely in my
apartment.

I went in and flopped down on my bed, tired from
being out all day. I just laid there for a moment, staring out my
bedroom window. It was cold out, but not colder than Sean’s
attitude. He was mad at me for wanting to go home. What gives?

I walked into the kitchen to get a glass of apple
juice. Just as I picked up the phone to call Keisha, the doorbell
rang.

“Who is it?” I yelled.

“It’s Sean.”

I went to the door quickly. “Hey. What are you doing
here?”

Sean walked in my apartment and started pacing
back-and-forth in my living room like he was losing it. “This isn’t
working.”

“What’s not working?”

“This. I don’t want to be dropping you off at your
apartment and I’m going home like I’m single. We’re supposed to be
together, right?” Sean was right up in my face talking to me.

“We
are
together, Sean.”

“Okay, so why do I have to go home alone tonight
without you?”

“Because I live here and you live there.”

“Well, I don’t want you to live here anymore. I want
you to move back in. There, I said it.”

“Sean, we just got together and…”

“And what? You don’t trust me?”

“I do trust you. I just don’t want to rush into
this.”

“Into what?” Sean was getting heated. “Our
relationship…our marriage.”

“Sean, don’t blow up, okay? I just want to take it
slow.”

“Then we have an even bigger problem, because when I
know what I want, I go for it. There’s no need to take anything
slow if you love me like you say you do.”

“I do love you.”

“Then stop telling me and show me. If you want to be
with me, then be with me, but I can’t handle picking you up and
dropping you off like this.”

“And what if I don’t agree with you? You’re just
going to leave? And then it’ll be over between us, Sean?”

“No, no, no.” Sean shook his head. “That’s not what
I’m saying, baby.”

“Then exactly what
are
you saying?”

“I’m saying I want to wake up next to you in the
morning and play silly games before we go to bed. I need that. I
need you.” Sean cuffed me in his arms. “I love you, Monica. I want
us to be together. That’s all I’m saying, baby.” He kissed me
tenderly on my lips. “I love you.”

He did have a point. It didn’t make any sense for a
husband and wife to live in separate houses, especially two people
like us. So, tonight, Sean spent the night at my apartment.

Two days later, I moved back into his
house.

Chapter 29 -
The Wedding

It was now the beginning of February. I’d
been living with Sean for a little over two months. During that
time, he officially proposed to me. He said I deserved more than
some contract marriage, and since we loved each other, we should
make our love known to the world.

~ * ~

Monica Annviere Smith

and

request the honor of your presence

at their marriage

on Saturday, the twenty-sixth day of
February

two-thousand and five

at four o’clock in the afternoon…

~ * ~

Our invitations were light pink – so light
that they could pass for white. The border was embossed with an
intricate heart design and our print was in a fancy script
font.

All of our family and friends were at the ceremony.
Keisha was my maid of honor and Warren and Derrick were Sean’s best
men. We were married inside of our home on Lake Drive with close to
a hundred guests that fit comfortably inside our huge living area.
Sean wanted the wedding to be at the Pfister Hotel, but Victoria
said it would be more intimate if we were married in our home. I
agreed.

I wore an ivory, strapless, one-piece
corseted back gown with iridescent beads and sequins. My hair was
in a spiral-curled ponytail, which perfectly complemented the
diamond-studded tiara that gave me the look of a princess. Keisha
kept my makeup intact with the help of Nikki and Victoria. I had so
many people powdering my face, I felt like an overpaid movie star.
Not to mention my own little paparazzi was there snapping pictures
like they’ve never seen a woman in a wedding gown before. I smiled
so frequently, I think I exhausted the muscles in my face.

Sean looked like a million bucks. He was
wearing a black, long-length, four-button lapel tuxedo with an
ivory vest that matched my gown. He was truly handsome. He said I
took his breath away when he saw me coming down the stairs, but he
took my breath away. I’ve never seen a man more beautiful and
strong like my Sean. He was the sun that kissed my skin on a spring
day, the mimosa that I drank after a long, stressful week, the
shower that I took after a two-mile jog – you get the picture. Sean
is the man that I always dreamed of, and he was all mine.

Roman wore a tuxedo identical to Sean’s. My
bridesmaids, Nikki and Chandra, wore lipstick red, chiffon
halter-top dresses that nearly dragged the floor. My niece, Ciara,
was my pretty little flower girl. She wore a red dress with white
ruffles around the collar. She was adorable.

Following the ceremony, the wedding party
stood in the horseshoe driveway out front to take pictures. There
was a fresh white coating of snow that fell the day before. It must
have fallen just for us. Turns out it was the perfect backdrop for
my dress, and the white signified the purity of our marriage.

The reception immediately
followed the wedding, and
we partied until dawn. It was
beautiful. I was so grateful to be in the company of family that
loved and cared about me and looked forward to Sean and I spending
the rest of our lives together. Needless to say, Deborah wasn’t in
attendance. I didn’t even send her an invitation. She didn’t
deserve one. She wasn’t a part of my life. Victoria was more of a
mother to me than she was and I’d only known her for about six
months.

MARRIED LIFE WAS off to a good start. Sean
and I were the perfect couple. We spent many nights at home since
it was so cold out. It was the middle of March, and there was ten
inches of snow on the ground with another six inches forecasted for
the next few days. So, we made the most of our time indoors. Sean
had every board game imaginable, and when we were tired of playing
games, we would watch pay-per-view movies. That was mostly on the
weekends. During the week, we both were busy at work.

The snow didn’t keep us home entirely. We
loved going out. One of our favorite restaurants was Bartolotta’s
Lake Park Bistro. I remember the first time we dined there. It was
on our one-week anniversary. Sean had called ahead and reserved our
table, and when we arrived, there was a red, rectangular gift box
on the table along with a few lit white-jarred candles. Sean
ordered a four-hundred-dollar bottle of wine. Then he poured some
of it in our glasses. He picked up his glass and swished the wine
around it smoothly, taking little sips while staring at me like he
couldn’t wait to get me home. At the end of the night, he told me
to open the gift. It was a white gold, one and a half carat journey
necklace. “That represents the moment we first met up until our
marriage,” he told me. “That was our first journey and we will have
many more to go.” My eyes welled up with tears.

Sean always spoiled me with jewelry, as if
he needed to. My wedding ring was all the bling I needed. Sean had
given me a five-carat, three-stoned platinum wedding ring when we
got married. When I saw it, I was speechless. Some days, I just
stare at it and think about how much he loves me. Keisha said she
couldn’t look at it unless she had her shades on. For real though,
the ring must have cost him a fortune. So, I really didn’t need
more jewelry, but I couldn’t tell Sean that. If he wanted to buy me
something, then it was going to happen no matter what I said
anyway.

He spoiled me in other ways, too. Most days
when he came home from work, he would pick me up, carry me to our
bedroom, and just have his way with me. It didn’t matter who was
there or what I was doing at the time.

We never actually made love. Even on our
wedding night, we didn’t make love. That was surprising, especially
since Sean was so touchy and aggressive in other ways. We’d been
married for a month now and lovemaking was nonexistent. The
foreplay was good, but that’s all it was. It never led to any real
action. There were a few instances when he tore off my nightie
because he wanted our naked bodies to touch in a hurry, but that
didn’t result in any action either.

Sean also began to exhibit strange behavior.
He would constantly say how lucky he was to have me in his life.
And unlike before, he was clingy. He was everywhere I was. If I was
downstairs lying on the couch reading a book, then he was playing
with my toes. If I was washing my hair, he was standing behind me
waiting to condition it for me. If I was shopping with Keisha, he
was text messaging me or calling me constantly to find out when I
would be home. I never complained to Sean about it. Besides, it
wasn’t that big of a deal to me. I loved being close to Sean, and
it was obvious that he loved being close to me. So, I concluded
that his behavior wasn’t extreme, but normal.

Last night was different, though. We’d come
so close to making love for the first time and suddenly, he broke
out in tears like his world had just ended, as his naked body laid
still on top of mine. His exact words were, “Oh, Monica, baby, I
love you sooo much. Don’t ever leave me.” Then as he gasped for
air, his tearful plea became sterner. “Promise me that you’ll never
leave me! No matter how bad things are between us, no matter what.
Promise me!”

To say that he scared me is an
understatement. I’d never seen him so distraught. I never even saw
him cry like that before, period. Sean wasn’t the type to just
burst out in tears on a whim. He was cocky and arrogant, and though
women frown upon those qualities in men, I grew to love those
qualities in him. He wore them well and they suited his
lifestyle.

He completely took me off guard when he
demanded that I promise not to leave him.
Why would he demand
such a thing unless he’s done something he feels guilty about? Has
he been cheating on me?
He never gave me a reason to question
his fidelity before. Then again, we never made love. Maybe if he
wasn’t giving it to me, he was giving it to another woman.

I answered yes to his request at the time because I
planned on being with him forever. Marriage was for better or
worse, and if the worse came before the better, then that was just
something I had to endure. I had no intentions on ever leaving
Sean. I wanted to be with him for the rest of my life. However, I
wasn’t going to tolerate a man that couldn’t be faithful to me.
That’s where I drew the line.

In the morning, Sean called my cell. Normally, he
wouldn’t call me in the mornings on weekdays since I was usually at
school. But I had gotten up early, dropped off Roman, and went back
home. Warren or Derrick must have driven by the house and spotted
my car in the yard. Somebody told him that I was home. Either way
it goes, I didn’t answer Sean’s call. I was too much of a wreck to
talk to him.

When he came home twenty minutes later, I was
sitting on the couch in the family room with tears streaming down
my face. He walked over to me and kneeled down beside the
couch.

“Monica, I’m sorry about last night.”

“What was last night, Sean? What happened to
you?”

“I don’t know what came over me.”

“What do you mean you don’t know? You know!
Why were you crying? Why are you making me promise to never leave
you? I have never given you a reason to think that I would leave
you.”