Shhh...Mack's Side (19 page)

Kyle and I made love
in the wide open pool of the hotel that night. That was the last time until the Christmas that I went home. The year spent coming home from school to testify, answering question after question and then answering more, was spent with mostly my family and Gia. We had to keep our stories straight. We had to talk. We had to pretend. That’s when Gianna decided to get married, thinking she could forget all this and live happily ever after.

Now I think she was just like me, trying to run from something she would never be able to hide from.

“Why are you crying? Get up?”

I could hear Mr. Nichols’
voice, but he seemed so far away. Where was I? What the hell happened to me?

“I want to go home,” I whined, not recognizing the whiny little girl voice coming from my mouth. What was happening to me? Something was off. Way off. I needed help. I was scared.

“Go home to where, Mack? Where would you go home to? Shayla Bay? New York, or maybe that one-house-town you moved to, to shut the world out. Where do you want me to take you, Mack?”

Looking around the crazy person’s room, I wondered the same question. Gazing up, I saw the eyes of my destiny. I deserved to be right there, right where I was, locked in a room away from society.
Mr. Nichols deserved that much and so much more. I owed him my life, at least seven years of it. Or had I already given it to him?

Mr. Nichols sat across from me and leaned against the wall, elbows on knees. “Eat,” he ordered, nodding to my brown sack of lunch. I didn’t want to eat. I couldn’t eat bologna one more day. “It’s peanut butter.”

“I want to see Gia. Please, can I see Gia?”

“How good of friends do you really think you were?”

“What do you mean? I would give my life for Gia.”

“Why? She sure as fuck wouldn’t do that for you.”

“Yes she would.”

Snorting, he assured me she would not. “Let’s talk about the day you decided to ruin my life.”

“I didn’t want to ruin your life. We didn’t think it would go that far.”

“Yeah, so this is what I keep hearing. How far did you think it was going to go? I spent seven years in prison, McKenzie. Seven years of my life. Seven years that
I can’t get back. My daughter is being raised by another man because of you.”

“It wasn’t my idea.”

“Oh, I’m well aware of that. That’s what your problem has always been, right, Mack?”

I didn’t understand the question, or if I was supposed to even answer. I took a bite of my stale bread sandwich and contemplated
his question. “I didn’t know I had a problem.”

He laughed. “You’ve got a lot of problems. They started when you were—how long have you known Gia?”

“All my life. Our parents went to school together.”

“And your parents were best friends
, too, right? They still hang out, too?”

“Nah, Gia’s dad took another job and moved away. They stopped talking years ago.”

“They should have done it before they subjected you to Gia’s poison. Gia has this addicting poison, permeating people around her. She has a way of sucking you in, giving you a taste to keep you coming back for more. You ever taste Gia?”

“What?”

“Don’t do that. It pisses me off. Have you ever tasted Gia? You two ever mess around?”

I looked away. Cara was laying on my disgusting bed. She didn’t look like Cara. She looked like an old doll, arms and legs straight as boards.

“Answer me, McKenzie. My patience have been worn thin enough today from your friend already.”

“Why? What did Gia do?” I asked. I didn’t want to talk about that night. Taking a bite of my sandwich, I swished water around my teeth, hoping he was going to let it go.

“What is Gia always doing? She’s bad news. You and I both should have stayed away from her.”

“I love Gia.”

“Yeah, and she loved to pull your strings. You were nothing more than a peasant. Gia was the leader. Gia told you what to say, what not to say, what to wear, where to go, what boys you could fuck. Tell me I’m wrong, Mack. Tell me that’s not how it was.”

I couldn’t tell him that. He was right. Gia was always the ring leader. I didn’t mind, I mean
, she was my best friend. That’s what friends did, right?

“Answer my question.”

“What question?” I asked, looking to see if he was going to get mad because I asked again. He snickered and moved toward me on one knee.

“Have you ever tasted Gia?”

Dropping my eyes in shame, I replied with the truth. “Yes.”

“When?”

“The night.”

“The night?”

“Yes. The night we went to your house.”

“Let’s talk about that night.”

“Why?”

“Because I deserve to know every detail. Don’t you think?” he rasped, moving back to his perched position on the wall.

“Yes, you do,” I admitted.

“You know if you would have let her take her own fall, none of this would have happened, or at least you wouldn’t have been involved, right? I know you didn’t come up with all this. That’s why I’m not sold on the whole idea that it wasn’t planned.
”

“It wasn’t.”

“Why’d you do it, Mack? Tell me everything. Make me understand how a bright, pretty girl like you gets caught in Gia Edwards’ web.”

“You were
going to fail her. You were ruining her scholarship. We had requirements.”

“So you just agreed to place her name at the top of your paper? Why would you do that, Mack?”

“She needed the good grade. I didn’t. That’s why all this happened. All because you couldn’t just let it slide. I bet you wished you would have let it slide now,” I said raising my voice. “It was your fault, too.”

“It was my fault. Not becau
se I gave you both big fat zeroes, but because I got tangled up. I was in Gia’s web, too. I couldn’t stay away from her. Just like you couldn’t stay away from her. Did you ever try, Mack? Did you ever think maybe you needed to broaden your friends list?”

“Once. We were in the third grade. Gia sat in the back of Ms. Messer’s class. She was mad when Ava Waybright moved there. She didn’t like Ava and didn’t want me to like her either. I did like her though, but not for long. Gia wouldn’t let me.”

“What do you mean, she wouldn’t let you? Why did you spend your entire life doing what Gia said?”

“I don’t know. I had to.”

“You had to not be friends with Ava in the third grade because Gia said you couldn’t be her friend?”

“Well, she didn’t say I couldn’t be her friend, she just told her something so s
he wouldn’t talk to me anymore,” I countered, letting my mind wander to the third grade.

“Stay away from me,”
Ava said. I was running after her down the hallway. I wanted to see if she wanted to come over and hangout.

“Why?”
I asked, not understanding.

“
Because of Gia. I’m new here. I don’t want trouble. Go away.”

“Gia doesn’t care if we’re friends,”
I tried, still chasing after her.

“Gia does care
,” Gia said, shoving her to the girls’ bathroom.
 

“Gia, stop. What are you doing?”
I questioned. Ava was scared of Gia. I could tell.

“I didn’t talk to her. She talked to me,”
Ava assured her, begging for her eight-year-old life. Gia shoved her backward and she fell right on her butt. Gia laughed when her dress went up and we could see her ballerina panties. Gia called her a baby for wearing little girl panties.

“Spit on her, Mack
,” Gia ordered.

“No. Why? Leave her alone, Gia. She didn’t do anything.”

“Oh, you want to be her new best friend? I’m sure I can find someone else to fill your shoes.”

“I didn’t say that. I can be her friend
, too.”

“No. You can’t. It’s her or me. If you want to continue being my friend then spit it her face.”

I looked down at a scared Ava and back to Gia. I could see the smirk on Gia’s face. She knew I was going to be her friend. I pulled some saliva from my throat and apologized with my eyes. The spit landed in the corner of her eye and she flinched. Gia laughed and pulled me by my arm.

“Now stay the fuck away from us,” she ordered
. Yes, even at eight, Gia talked like that. I’m not sure where she learned it. Our parents didn’t use that sort of language. Not while I was around anyway. I often wondered if something happened to Gia when she was a little girl to make her the way she was. If it did, she never told me.

“So you let Gia dictate your life from the get go, huh?”

I didn’t answer Mr. Nichols that time. It didn’t require an answer. I guess I did. He was right. Gia was the puppet
master and I did what she did, surrendering my strings.

“Tell me about the night.”

“Well, after you gave us both zeroes for cheating, things got out of hand. Gia lost her scholarship, her parents were furious with her, she wasn’t going to school with me anymore, and you were ruining everything. We just went there to talk to you.”

“Go on.”

“We were just hanging out in the parking lot. We were angry. We were supposed to be on the field leading our girls. It was the last school show we’d preform. Spring Fling was a big deal and we were sitting in a car while the show went on without us.”

“Yeah…”

“Gia acquired a bottle of Gray Goose from her parents. We were sitting in her car, listening to the pep band, bitching about not getting to perform at Spring Fling, you giving us both zeroes, her going to some school, far, far away from me, her dance scholarship that you tore into tiny little pieces, and our lives that you were ruining, all over one little grade.”

“Mmm
hmm,” Mr. Nichols, murmured, wanting me to continue.

“We were just talking, messing around, I thought, anyway. I didn’t think we were really going to
go to your house. We sat there, waiting for you to leave. We thought you were leaving with your wife and kid as soon as the rally was over. You walked to a burgundy SUV with an older couple and your wife. Little Cara was asleep over your shoulder. Gia had this look, like, I don’t know,” I said, thinking about it. “I mean it was hate for you ruining everything, but there was something else. Something about the way she looked at your wife.”

I lost myself in the crazy life that was mine as a senior.

“What do you th
ink their sex life is like?”
Gia asked me, sitting in her car, glaring evil daggers right through Mr. Nichols’ wife.

“Their sex life?”
I asked, puzzled. We were just talking about how we could make him pay thirty seconds before.

“Yeah, you
think he likes fucking his wife?”

“I guess so. She’s pretty,”
I said, not knowing what I was supposed to say.

“You think she’s pretty?”
Gia asked, snapping her head and the dagger stared at me now.

“Um, yeah. You don’t?”

“I don’t think he knows what
fucking
really means. I think he knows what making love means. Look at her. Her shorts are practically to her knees. She’s probably one of those, do me in the dark type. I bet she doesn’t even suck his dick.”

Blinking my eyes, I reentered the future, staring at the art work drawn with crayons across the room when Mr. Nichols spoke.

“You know what, Mack? She’s right,” he said.

“What do you mean?” I asked with constricted eyes.

“Gia. She was right about my wife. We didn’t
really fuck. We made love. Sarah was a little conservative. She felt a lot of things were sinful. I didn’t mind. I loved her and it was enough. At first. Until Gia, anyway.”

“Gia?” I asked, swallowing the lump in my throat.

“Yeah. Gia. I was married to Sarah for almost four years. We were happy. We had a beautiful baby girl, a house, nice cars, great jobs, and each other. What more could you ask for, right, Mack?”

What was he saying? I wasn’t sure whether I was supposed to answer or not, so I didn’t. I just sat there, sweaty palms and dry mouth, waiting for him to say what I knew he was going to say.

“Men have needs. I don’t care how happy a man thinks he can be, without certain things in his life, he can’t be happy.”

“Like what?”

“They think they’re happy, but really they’re not,” he continued, ignoring my question. “Then you throw danger to the mix, like your little buddy, Gia. Gianna Edwards is evil, I tell you. She’s addicting. You know exactly what I’m talking about, don’t you?” I nodded. I knew without needing to analyze it. “I should have known the very first time our eyes locked how dangerous she was. You think everyone has a person, Mack?”