Shiver (12 page)

We walked out to Lawrence’s truck to see him off. He climbed in and started the engine, waving good-bye. Just before he shut the door, he looked to me.

“See ya, sugar britches,” he said with a wink, slamming his door before Ethan could retort.

I laughed and tugged Ethan’s arm. “Come on, sugar britches. Didn’t you say something about ravaging me at your house later?”

“I did, actually. Is it later?”

I nodded. “Yes, plus you owe me a back rub.”

“I do? Why?”

“You just do. Think of it as foreplay.”

“Oh, babe, you’re not going to be able to think of anything by the time I’m done with you.” He looked me over from head to toe and pulled me flush against him, giving my lips a sweet peck and then grabbing my ass. “Let’s get out of here.”

“Then you need to call your mom,” I said pointedly.

“Wow. Talk about a mood killer. Can you never talk about sex and my mom in the same sentence ever again?”

I laughed. “I promise.”

“And I called her already. She just sounds relieved to try to move forward, but with lots of help and support, and she’s excited about us coming to see her.”

“You told her about me?”

“Of course I did. You’re the reason all this is getting put into motion. Plus you’re in my life now. She should know about you.”

His words made butterflies swarm in my stomach, but I just smiled, trying to play it cool.

We walked into the mudroom of his house and took our boots off, groaning in relief. We left our jackets too before hurrying into the living room. I flopped on my stomach on the couch and closed my eyes to wait. And wait…

I opened my eyes and saw Ethan standing with his pants still on but his shirt off, arms crossed over his chest.

“What? I’m waiting for my back rub.”

“Are we entering into the stage of the relationship where you’re too tired for sex already? You have to help me out. Remember, I’m new to all this.”

I laughed. “No. I fully plan on letting you have your way with me. But if you don’t rub my back I may not be able to move, and that would hinder us.”

He strolled over and worked his fingers under my shirt. His fingertips followed my spine and he tugged on the hem. “Well, I can’t give a proper back rub through all this material. Your shirt needs to go.” Then his hands dipped under the waistband of my jeans, making me shiver. “These need to go too. If I’m going to do the job right.”

I buried my face into the couch and smiled into the cushions. “Why do my pants need to come off for a back rub? I might get cold.”

“Oh, I’ll make sure you stay warm.” His lips touched the dip of my lower back where he’d pushed my shirt up, and I squirmed. Suddenly he swatted my butt, hard.

“Ouch!” I popped up, sitting.

He pointed at me. “You. Naked. Now.”

“Holy caveman,” I muttered, secretly loving it.

“You love it.”

Okay, not so secret.

I quickly stripped my clothes off, very aware of his watching my every move. I didn’t think my movements could be considered sexy, especially since there was no graceful way to shimmy out of a sports bra, but judging from the look on Ethan’s face, it didn’t much matter. I stood a little self-consciously as he stared at me, and then I moved to lie back down on the couch.

He stopped me quickly with a kiss, his fingers suddenly wrapped in my hair, tugging my head to the side to gain access to my neck. As soon as his lips met that spot, the spot that got me every time, my knees buckled and I gripped the belt loops of his pants. He kissed his way back up to my lips before pulling away, panting.

“Ready for your back rub?”

“Huh?” I blinked.

“Back rub. Foreplay?” he prodded, smiling.

“Oh, right. Yes.” I lay back down on my stomach, folding my arms under my head.

He straddled my thighs, and his hands started to knead the muscles in my neck and shoulders, working down to my lower back.

“Oh my gosh, that feels so good.” I groaned loudly, my words running together.

I felt him start to shake with suppressed laughter.

“Not everything is meant to be sexual!” I said, feigning indignation.

“Babe, from where I’m sitting, everything is most definitely sexual.”

I felt him bend over to kiss every spot he’d touched with his hands, slowly working his way over every inch of my back with his lips. I was lulled into a dreamlike state until he started moving lower and lower and my heart rate started to increase. I began to roll over, but he stopped me by holding my hips.

“Stay right there,” he whispered as he stepped away from me to strip off his pants.

He returned, nudging my legs apart and kneeling between them. One hand tilted my hips as he bent to kiss my neck, sliding into me and continuing his massage with his other hand as he moved. The onslaught of sensation was almost too much. My body couldn’t decide whether to tense or relax. The deep pressure of his hands releasing the tension in my sore muscles relaxed one part of my brain while his continued motion inside me excited another.

“Never. Stop.” My words came out breathlessly.

I heard him chuckle softly as he matched the massage to his tempo, and soon I was lost to everything but what his touch was building in me. My body was heating deliciously, and the war between tension and relaxation waged on until the tension took over and shattered me into a million pieces.

He collapsed on top of me heavily, catching his breath and nuzzling into my hair.

“Am I crushing you?”

“Yes,” I mumbled into the couch. “But never leave.”

We had lain like that for a few minutes, completely sated, when a knock at the front door startled us both.

“Who would be here, and who would knock?” I wondered aloud.

“Well, thank God they did!” He laughed, getting up and pulling his pants back on. I looked at him, pouting. He swatted my rear again and told me to get up.

“What is it with you and the spanking?”

“I can’t help myself. You have the best ass I’ve ever seen, and I need every excuse in the world to touch it. Plus you’re a smart-ass and need to be put in your place. Now go shower while I answer the door.”

“I should probably go home at some point.”

He looked at me, confused. “Why?”

“Well, I’ll probably need clothes and my own toothbrush.” I laughed. “And I don’t want you to get sick of me either. We’ve only just started this whole thing.” I gestured between us.

He looked ready to say something, but another sharp rap on the door interrupted.

“Stay. Have dinner with me. And we’ll sort all that out later. K?”

I nodded and hurried off to the shower before whoever was at the door decided to just come on in and get an eyeful.

When I was finished rinsing off, I pulled on a T-shirt of Ethan’s and a pair of boxers, rolling them at the top. I scrunched my wet hair into a messy bun at the back of my head and padded back out into the living room.

I stopped short when I saw Heather standing there, dressed to kill in a black pencil skirt, sheer blouse, and lethal heels, her hand on Ethan’s bare arm. I was only comforted when I saw him shrug off her touch.

I cleared my throat to make my presence known as I walked in.

“Heather, right? Nice to see you again.” I approached with my hand outstretched.

She took it again in her fingertips and gave a small shake. It made me want to grab her hand with both of mine and teach her how to do it properly. Seriously, how had she made it this far in life?

“Oh… Lisa. Right?” She looked mildly confused.

“Lissa,” I said, correcting her.

Her eyes traveled down my outfit to my bare feet. “Do you live here?”

I opened my mouth to respond, but Ethan beat me to it.

“Not yet.” He wrapped an arm around my waist and drew me close.

I tried to mask my shocked reaction to his words as I watched varied emotions cross Heather’s face.

He continued, “I was just explaining to Heather that I no longer have any sort of arrangement with my father, and therefore we have no need to see each other again. Right, babe?” He looked down at me, giving a squeeze.

“Sure seems that way.” I smirked at him.

“How old are you?” she blurted out.

“Excuse me? What kind of question is that?” My jaw dropped slightly.

“I just mean you seem rather young for Ethan here. I don’t understand…” She glanced between us uncomfortably.

“Well, you don’t know Ethan very well. He’s extremely immature for his age,” I retorted as I moved to open the front door. “Now, if you’ll excuse us, we have cartoons to watch.”

I held the door open and gestured for her to move out. She looked between Ethan and me huffily before spinning and strutting out. I swung the door shut immediately after she crossed the threshold and turned to see Ethan’s eyebrows raised and a half smile on his face.

“Your territorial side is hot.”

I poked him in his bare chest. “You should not walk around answering the door shirtless. It sends the wrong message.”

“What message is that?” His grin widened.

“The message that any of this”—I swirled my hands quickly up his arms and around his chest and abs, my fingers lingering a little longer than necessary at the
V
—“is anyone’s but mine to touch.”

He captured my hands in his and brought them up to his lips, planting a kiss on each one. “I would never willingly send that message, my dear. And you are the only one allowed, and the only one I want, to touch any part of me.” He kissed the tip of my nose. “Now. I need a shower, you need to feed Charlie. I’ll make dinner, then I’m taking you to bed to keep you awake for the rest of the night.”

“You’re insatiable.” I shook my head.

“Only for you.”

He left me with a smile on my lips.

Chapter 16

“Y
ou sure you want me to go with you? I could stay and keep things running at the barn,” I called from my closet as I tried to pick out appropriate clothes for our trip.

“Of course I want you to come. The horses will survive without work for the three days we’re gone. I need you more.” He stepped into the closet with me. “I told you, my mom is doing great. She’s home and it sounds like things are going well with her meetings. I just want to check on her in person, and we can also enjoy a little California sunshine and warmth. And I want my mom to meet you.”

“And I want to meet her too.” That wasn’t entirely accurate. I mean, I did and I didn’t. It wasn’t that I was uncertain of my feelings for Ethan, but I’d never “met the parents” before, not counting Ethan’s dad, which I didn’t.

“Liar.” He smiled and kissed my forehead. “Don’t be nervous. She’ll love you. Besides, it’d be really obnoxious if you pulled out of your ticket at the last minute.”

I pursed my lips and gave him a look.

Within a few hours, we were strapped into our tiny airplane seats, flying over the clouds toward a much warmer climate. It was a five-hour flight, and while I would have ordinarily loved to spend five uninterrupted hours with Ethan, ideally that wouldn’t take place in a tube filled with a hundred some-odd people and three bathrooms. To take my mind off that, I had my Kindle loaded with books I hadn’t had the time or energy to read lately. Once we were allowed, I settled against Ethan’s shoulder to lose myself in a story.

It sometimes surprised people how effectively I could tune out the world when I fell into a great read. I didn’t do it in the company of others often because, well, it was pretty rude. My family knew they could talk at me for twenty minutes and I wouldn’t process a word of what they’d said. Ethan had not had the dubious honor of witnessing it.

“Are you reading porn?” he whispered really loudly over my shoulder, startling me into actually dropping the Kindle onto my lap.

I fumbled to keep it from falling to the floor. “What? No!” I whispered back, laughing. “Are you reading over my shoulder?”

“I’ve been trying to talk to you for the past five minutes, and you haven’t heard a word I said. I figured I should see what had you so captivated.”

I started to giggle. “It’s not porn. It’s romance!”

“Romance.” He scoffed. “So you would consider it romantic if my huge cock slapped you in the face?”

I let out an incredibly loud bark of laughter, drawing looks from surrounding passengers. “That is not what it says!” I smacked him in the chest.

“Go on. Enlighten me then.”

“It’s about the emotions, you asshole! The feelings people have when they fall in love. The man who would never settle down finding his other half, who makes him realize he needs no one but her. If a penis inadvertently smacks someone in the face”—I shrugged, grinning wickedly—“well, so be it.”

He threw his arm around me, squeezing me close and kissing the top of my head. “You still fascinate me.” He laughed.

“I still haven’t decided if that’s a good thing or not,” I muttered.

“It’s good. I promise.”

We touched down at LAX and grabbed our carry-ons, happy to stretch and deplane. Ethan had managed to ease up on teasing me for a couple of thirty-minute increments during the entire flight. It was amazingly hard to concentrate on a story when whispers about UPS men and pillow fights were filtering in.

A bus took us to the rental-car station, and after checking in and signing our lives away, we walked into the parking lot to see a purple PT Cruiser awaiting us. I immediately snorted in laughter.

Ethan shook his head. “I can’t believe you snort, for one. And also, I can’t believe we are driving in that thing.”

I caught my breath, saying, “I only snort when something is so ridiculous that I can’t contain myself. This is amazing. Do you think…?”

“I’m afraid to ask.”

“Do you think we could try peeling out of the parking lot? Please!” I clapped my hands.

“Are we really that juvenile?” He glanced sideways.

I just nodded. ’Cause it was true.

He laughed as we got in and buckled up. “Hold on, sweetheart. This could get crazy.”

We grinned at each other as he started the engine and slammed his foot on the gas pedal. The engine revved and hummed and strained, and we glided slowly out of our space.

I sat silently, chewing on my lip for a moment before looking over at him again. “That was anticlimactic.”

He shook his head, shoulders trembling. “Can we please never speak of a lack of climax ever again?”

I shrugged and patted his shoulder. “Don’t worry, honey. It happens to the best of us.”

“Stop it, or I’ll have to prove myself right here right now.”

I sucked in a breath. “You would do me in a Cruiser?” I gasped dramatically.

“Babe, I’d make sure you never make fun of this car again. And I’d do you anywhere, so don’t be so shocked.”

He squeezed my thigh and I scooted a little closer, settling in for the hour drive down to Balboa Island.

“Are you tired of me yet? This is a lot of time to be stuck together,” I wondered aloud as I rested my head on his shoulder.

“I told you I’ll never get tired of you.”

I propped myself up to watch his face. “I’m still not sure how you can say that.”

“Lissa, I don’t know how many ways I can say this to you until you understand. I’ve never been with anyone I can be myself around like I can with you. Aside from the endless entertainment of having you here”—he smirked—“and my endless desire to see you naked at all times. You’re…”

I waited quietly until I couldn’t anymore. “I’m what?”

He sighed. “I don’t have many close friends. I have some from when I was a little kid, but I don’t see them ever. They’re all dealing with their own lives. We catch up every now and again and it’s great. I know they’d be there for me if I ever needed anything. But they work normal jobs and are on track for a more mainstream life. I’ve never had anyone to just… talk about my day with who would understand. I don’t have a Steph in my life. Until you. God, this sounds so stupid… but you’re not just my girlfriend. You’re my best friend. The person I want to talk to every day and spend time with”—his hand moved higher up my thigh—“and touch.”

He smiled innocently over at me as I stopped his hand on its travels.

“You better concentrate on the one-o-one there, mister. I am not explaining to your mother why we got in an accident.”

He sighed heavily. “You promised to never mention my mother and sex together again.”

“Only when you deserve it.” I smirked back. “Besides, there were key moments in there we should probably discuss.”

He took his eyes off the road for a moment to look at me. “Such as?”

“Girlfriend.”

“You don’t like girlfriend?”

“No, I love the idea of girlfriend! Actually, I hate the word. It sounds stupid. But the idea I love. We just… we’ve never used the word before…”

He rolled his eyes. “Are you feeling insecure?”

I slumped in my seat. “Maybe. I’ve never met a boyfriend’s… er, whatever’s… mom before. And I don’t even know how to introduce myself. Do I call myself your assistant trainer?”

He just laughed at me. “Women are amazing. Have you been stressing over this?”

I smacked his head. “No. I haven’t been stressing. It just occurred to me when you used the
g
-word. We never talked about the
g
-word.”

“You do realize we spend all day together and we haven’t spent a night apart since January first, right?”

“Yes.”

“And you’ve been thinking what? That we’ve just been fooling around all this time?”

“Well no, not exactly.”

“Is that what you want?” He raised an eyebrow at me and frowned.

“No! I…” I groaned and looked up to the roof of the car. “I don’t want to be that girl who pressures you or is crazy about getting married and having babies. I love the time we spend together. But it’s all gone pretty fast and we’ve basically been living together and now I’m meeting your mom and I’m not sure what it all means!” I shrugged. “I’ve been trying to play it cool.”

“Yes, I can really see that,” he deadpanned, earning another smack. He caught my hand and brought it to his lips. “Will you promise me something?” he asked between kisses.

I nodded.

“Don’t keep stuff like this from me. There’s nothing we can’t talk about and work through. I hate the thought that this has been festering in your overactive mind for so long and you never brought it up.”

“I’m not even sure I knew. Plus, I didn’t want to scare you off.”

He laughed lightly. “Lissa, I’m all in with you. Nothing’s going to scare me off. Yes, I want you to be my girlfriend, even if it’s a stupid word. I want you and only you. You’re my other half. My better half. The part I didn’t even realize was missing until I found you.”

I sighed and linked our fingers. “That was pretty good.”

“I know.” He kissed my hand once more.

A half hour later, we came to a small, curved bridge that allowed us to cross the bay onto a quaint island. Cars were lined up in both directions in every available parking space in front of the rows of restaurants, shops, and boutiques. I was getting whiplash as I tried to peer in windows and take it all in as Ethan chattered on about the good old days.

“It’s gotten more and more touristy,” he said. “But it’s always been busy. You tend to try to drive your car as little as possible because you don’t want to lose your parking spot. And you never pass up on a space thinking there might be one closer. That’s a missed opportunity.”

We turned right once we got off the main drag and made a few more turns when we spied a place to park and swooped our fancy rental car in. I looked up to the house we were parked in front of. It was a huge stucco mansion, towering over its neighbors and taking up every inch of space in the lot.

“Wow,” was all I could say.

“Yeah, ugly as shit, isn’t it? This whole island used to be just beach houses. People started buying lots and tearing down the properties. I guess nobody thought to protect the views or anything. Kind of sad. My mom has one of the last original beach houses. It’s been in her family forever. Fortunately she inherited it after my parents’ divorce, so we had a place to go. I only lived here until I finished high school though.”

We walked down the sidewalk for a block and came to an adorable brown wooden cottage with a sand yard. Ethan held open the front gate for me and latched it behind us. He grabbed my hand and gave it a squeeze as we walked to the front door just as it burst open. A tall, fit-looking woman in her late fifties stood there, a bright smile on her face. Her eyes were bright blue, and her silver hair was bobbed sleek and short. She was wearing a pair of jeans and a simple white blouse, her feet bare.

Ethan stepped forward and gave his mom a hug. “How are you, Mom?”

“I’m good. I’m really good.” She looked at him through blue, watery eyes, then turned to me. “You must be Lissa. I’m Susan.”

She reached forward and I went to shake her hand and return her greeting, but she spread her arms and enveloped me in a hug, surprising me.

“Thank you,” she whispered softly in my ear. But before I could respond, she turned back to the house and ushered us all inside.

We entered the front living room and Susan sat us on a leather couch, settling herself across from us in a wingback chair. There was a pitcher of water with lemon slices that she poured into glasses for each of us. It was not a terribly uncomfortable silence, but it was a far cry from the boisterous time I spent with my own family. We all took a sip of water, and I glanced between mother and son.

“Lissa,” she said. “I want to thank you for the connection with your brother-in-law. What a wonderful man he is.” She smiled kindly.

I shifted in my seat. “Rob is great. He’s one of the most selfless people I’ve ever met.” I took a deep breath. “And I’m so glad he could help you navigate all this.” I waved my hand a little stupidly. I had no idea how to act in this situation. I didn’t know this woman, yet I seemed to feel intimate parts of her struggle that I hadn’t earned the right to. And of course, I did know her son intimately.

Ethan was sitting and watching us thoughtfully. He leaned back into the couch, draping his arm on the back behind my shoulders. “So, Mom, how do you feel being back home?”