Sins of the Father (7 page)

“I don’t think you should back off. It might
well be the last important case that OSI closes. People are stupid
if they can’t see the difference that you’ve made.”

“Yeah, well Sanderfield is spinning a
different version of events. Seems he thinks we were pretty
ineffective until Darkwater Bay finally did something proactive.
Apparently anything I’ve done over the past couple of years had no
results until you came along and started making things happen. And
where’s all of this baby furniture you planned to buy this morning,
by the way?”

“Eh, Maya and I got distracted over coffee.
We never actually got around to shopping for anything more than
decaffeinated sugary, fatty beverages.”

Johnny dropped the boxes back into the trunk
of the car and drew me into his arms. “Good. I was feeling a little
excluded this morning.”

“I did get the number of her doctor. I’ve
got an appointment first thing in the morning. Think you can tear
yourself away from work for an hour or so to come with me? They
want to do an ultrasound.”

One hand splayed over my belly. Johnny
peered into my eyes. “I wouldn’t miss it for the world. I’m not
missing any of your appointments, Helen. We’re in this together,
right?”

I snuggled close and laid my head against
his chest and compartmentalized my life a little bit more. “I
certainly hope so.”

“Helen, don’t have a single doubt about it.
Nothing else matters as much to me as you and our family.”

“Not even the fate of all the people who
have counted on you to provide stable employment?”

“They’ll be fine. Chris is already talking
about retirement. It would remove a hefty chunk of our budget. God
knows I don’t need the money. We could trim a significant amount if
I took a pay cut.”

“You’re not doing such a dangerous job for
free.”

“Yet I wasn’t the pro bono who got hurt
recently, was I? No, that was you.”

I grinned up at him. “Who says I’m not
submitting a bill for my services?”

Johnny slammed the trunk shut, boxes still
inside. He steered me into the house. “What have you got in that
Styrofoam package?”

“An enormous cinnamon roll from the diner
across the street from Downey Division. Want to split it with
me?”

“Only if you’ll tell me how lunch with Tony
went.”

I couldn’t suppress the satisfied grin.
“He’s going to call Crevan, Johnny.”

“Ah, so your ulterior motive is now crystal
clear. Are you sure he’s going to say nice things when he calls
him?”

“I made a good argument for his best
behavior.”

“Uh-oh. Does that mean he’s going to call me
screeching that you threatened his life again?”

“No, but I did point out to him that his
attitude has been disturbingly similar to Aidan Conall’s, which he
didn’t like hearing, I might add.”

“Ouch,” Johnny winced visibly. “Way to push
his buttons, Doc. I’m not sure why, but Tony has never had a very
high opinion of Crevan’s father. Were you aware of that?”

It wasn’t as clear before, but after our
chat about Crevan’s missing twin sister, I understood it much
better. “He mentioned a few things in the past, after Crevan told
us that he informed his family about the pending divorce from
Belle. I knew there were some strong feelings, but I had no idea
why.”

“You figure it’s the religious thing?” he
let go of me and swung open the refrigerator. “Milk or do you
prefer coffee with dessert?”

“Milk,” I said. “I need the calcium.”

Johnny grinned. “Did you remember to take
your vitamin this morning?”

“Yep. And the other most remarkable thing
about lunch was how my appetite freaked out our somewhat
opinionated friend.”

“It’s good to hear you call Tony a friend
again, Helen. I know he’s crusty and difficult and the most
politically incorrect guy you’ve probably ever met, but he has a
good heart.”

We’d see about that. His greatest value to
me was still historical. I sat down at the kitchen table and
flipped open the box containing a brick sized cinnamon roll and
waited for Johnny to bring the milk. I dragged one finger through
the gooey cream cheese frosting and sucked on it.

“No comment?” Johnny placed two large
glasses of milk on the table. “And don’t eat all the frosting off
my half of that.”

“I said I’d share, not that you could have
half.”

His eyes twinkled. “Wrestle you for it.”

“No way, Orion. You’d lose.”

“I’ve had many arguments with you over food,
sweetheart. I must say, this is a refreshing about face. You eat to
your heart’s content.”

I unwound a strand of cinnamon freckled
dough and started nibbling. “So Maya and I chatted half the morning
before we parted company. I had a little extra time to kill before
I met Tony at the diner.”

“Do I want to know what you were doing?”

I reached for the milk and took a large
gulp. “I stopped by the Social Security Administration.”

“What for?” The wolverine eyebrows started
dancing.

“To legally change my name.”

Johnny grew very still. His hand hung
suspended over my confection.

“No comment?”

“Helen, are you serious?”

I nodded. “It’s legal now. I’m officially
Helen Eriksson Orion.”

“Honey… I thought…”

“I said I’d think about it. I thought about
it. It’s done. Don’t tell me that you’ve had a change of heart
already.”

Johnny dragged me across his thighs until I
was folded in an embrace from which there was no escape. He reached
for the cinnamon roll and started tearing off bites which were fed
to me with great care.

“I take it this means you approve.”

“Every time I think I couldn’t be happier in
life, you do something that dwarfs the last moment of contentment,”
he said. “I know the argument you made for keeping your name. It
was very logical, practical even.”

“Those were the real reasons, Johnny. You
know I never took Rick’s name either. It’s a pain in the ass
changing everything. Now I’ve got to call banks and credit card
companies. I need to get a new driver’s license. Not to mention my
license to practice psychology.”

“And something made you think it was worth
all that fuss and inconvenience?”

Our eyes met. “You,” I said. “You’re worth
it. You’ve offered me something precious, Johnny. I have a clean
slate, a new life, a name that isn’t tainted by my father’s
criminal past. Why wouldn’t I want to share the name of the man who
made everything better?”

Johnny kissed me softly. “Is that how you
really feel?”

“Yeah, it’s the truth, Johnny. You make me
know who I am.” Guilt vibrated inside my bones. Still, I pushed
ahead. I had no choice.

“You’ve always been who you are, Helen. A
name doesn’t change that.”

“That hasn’t been my experience.”

“Honey, you’re the same person I fell in
love with. You’re strong and brilliant and beautiful and courageous
–”

“You don’t have to say this.”

“And you’re stubborn and opinionated and
magnificently flawed. I love all of that. I love that you can’t
admit when you’re wrong. I love the way you lie so easily.”

“You’re crazy, Johnny.”

“What I love the most is that even when you
try to lie to me, I can see right through it. I know you, Helen.
The good, the bad, the confused. All of it. I love you in spite of
the things other people wouldn’t tolerate. I know why you are the
way you are. I get you, inside and out, all the dark corners that
you want to pretend don’t exist. Remember?”

“I don’t understand why.”

“We’re the same, deep down. I’m not perfect
either, even though you refuse to see the truth. Look where
jealousy took me a couple of weeks ago. You got hurt, and
ultimately, it was my fault.”

“But it wasn’t.”

“Yeah,” he said softly. “It really was. The
fact that you forgive it so easily, how is that different from what
I forgive in you?”

“Because your mistakes don’t hurt other
people. Mine always do. They always have. I told you once that I’m
toxic.”

“And my mistake hurt the only person I
wanted to protect. It hurt you. It wasn’t the first time that my
errors in judgment caused you to suffer.”

“Oh really?”

Johnny nodded. “First time was when I butted
into your personal life without permission.”

“In the long run, what you did protected me,
Johnny.”

“But you retreated from everyone who loves
you, including me. You wasted away to nothing because I pushed and
you refused to let anybody be close to you.”

“It wasn’t your fault. That’s my flaw, not
yours.”

“I knew damn well that you were planning to
go rogue the night you served that warrant at Dunhaven. Did I stop
you when it would’ve made a difference? No. I let you do what you
wanted. You got hurt. Hell, you wouldn’t have gotten shot at Uncle
Nasty’s if I hadn’t been so determined to dig for the truth. Yet
you don’t see it that way.”

“There’s no comparison for the things you’ve
done.”

Johnny’s arms tightened. “I know that Rick
Hamilton was filth, Helen. He deserved to die. Is suicide a
plausible story? Apparently so. Do I really buy that explanation
for his death?”

My chin dipped to my chest. “If you thought
it was a lie, why would you protect me like that?”

“I understand that kind of frustration. I
know that deep down in your heart, you’d never hurt someone truly
innocent. I know that whatever happened in the park that night, it
wasn’t premeditated, that you simply snapped. He threatened you. He
ruined your career, Helen.”

“How can you love me, if you believe that
you protected a murderer?” Large tears streaked down my cheeks.
Johnny brushed them away and held me tighter.

He didn’t answer the question right away,
and never did address it directly.

Finally, he spoke. “Salvatore Masconi.”

“What?”

“I was convinced he was guilty. Gwen told me
that he would never hurt another child again, Helen. I knew what it
meant. I ignored it, because I believed that a greater good had
been served. Later, I came to regret that decision, because I
learned the truth, that Masconi couldn’t have been Brighton
Bennett’s killer. By then, the trail was ice cold. The evidence
that would’ve put Datello behind bars was long since destroyed. I’m
not the paragon of virtue you think I am. You didn’t corrupt
me.”

“Why are you telling me this now?”

“Because you’re my wife. Because I don’t
want any secrets between us anymore. You need to understand that no
matter what happens, I love you. I accept that things are less than
perfect. You make sense to me, because in a lot of ways, we’re
exactly the same.”

“Would you be angry if I admitted that I
thought of telling you the truth after you married me because I
knew it would be protected by spousal privilege?”

Johnny laughed softly and kissed the side of
my head. “No, it wouldn’t upset me at all, nor would it come as any
surprise. What has amazed me since the very first case we worked
last year is how you pull such random tidbits of information
together to make a concrete case out of them. Helen, I know
something else happened with Gillette on that ship. What I don’t
know is why you’re keeping that information from me. Surely you
know that nothing will ever make me turn against you.”

“His death truly was self defense,
Johnny.”

“He’s lucky you got to him first.”

“You would’ve done the right thing. It was
an easy out for him. If I thought I had a choice, I’d have
preferred that he go to prison for his crimes, believe me. Death
was too kind.”

“Are you ready to tell me the truth about
what happened now?”

I opened my mouth to protest.

“Don’t lie to me. I know the
difference.”

“Johnny –”

“I can see a lie a mile away, Helen.
Whatever it is, you may as well tell me now. Who knows? Maybe I can
help sort out whatever it is that’s been eating at you.”

“I’m not ready to talk about it yet.”

“Get ready. I’ll lose patience eventually.
Do you really want me digging for the truth on my own again?”

“No,” I said softly.

“Then why don’t you tell me the truth right
now?”

“Because it could be nothing. I don’t want
to open a can of worms if I’m wrong.”

“And I’m still waiting for the day when your
gut leads you in the wrong direction. I don’t think it’s possible.
If you’ve got reason enough for suspicion, and it’s making you hide
something from me, odds are, you’re on the right track.”

I swallowed the lump that grew in the back
of my throat. “Gillette said something to me. He wasn’t concerned
about getting caught, Johnny. He said it wouldn’t matter, that
you’d be discredited to the point that it would be impossible to
prosecute him or anyone else.”

“I see.”

“Do you?”

“And exactly how were you planning to
investigate Sanderfield off the radar, Helen?”

“I don’t know. I hadn’t worked that out in
my head yet.”

“You think he’s been wise to the human
trafficking ring all along?”

“It’s possible. It’s also possible that
Datello was part of it all along.”

“I didn’t tell you everything,” Johnny said
slowly. “I was worried about your emotional state after we found
you.”

“What don’t I know?”

“Destiny Gerard claims that Datello was
behind the whole thing. She’s pedaling the
Sherman’s wife was a
victim, an unwitting pawn in the whole thing
story.”

“That’s a lie. They planned to rescue
Melissa Sherman from county jail, Johnny. It was part of the plan,
one that Gillette abandoned when I convinced him that it was only a
matter of time before you’d show up to rescue me. He pulled out of
Darkwater Bay early and abandoned his partners because he wasn’t
going to get caught until the evidence was properly disposed
of.”