Sleepless Nights (The Donovans of the Delta) (9 page)

“What is that rake up to now?” She went to her bedroom door, half expecting him to come storming up the stairs. Instead she heard the front door slam.

“So, I’ve sent him home in defeat.” But she knew, even as she said the words, that it wasn’t true. Tanner was never defeated and rarely retreated. She was glad. In spite of the blood she’d drawn, she had no desire to hurt him. She was merely defending herself, covering her vulnerability with bravado.

She hurried to her bedroom window and drew back the curtain. Tanner was getting into his car. She supposed it was instinct that made him know he was being watched. He looked up. The smile he gave her had enough voltage to light every Christmas tree in Greenville. She almost forgot their encounter in the kitchen.

He stood in the moonlight, bold and impossibly handsome, a real hero, and not just according to the papers. He was a man who had succeeded at everything he’d attempted, a generous man who had used his wealth and fame to endow libraries and build orphanages and establish scholarships. And a dangerously charming man who thumbed his nose at failure and whistled in the face of defeat.

She pressed her forehead against the windowpane. “Oh, Lord, Tanner. I
won’t
fall in love with you again.”

It was almost as if he had heard her.

“Amanda!” he called.

Every fiber of common sense she possessed warned her to ignore him. Instead she opened the window.

“Go away, Tanner. It’s over between us.”

“It will never be over between us. Remember that, Amanda.” He blew her a kiss, climbed into his flashy car, and drove off.

Amanda made herself turn away from the window and not watch his car disappear down the street. She would have an ordinary evening, she vowed. She’d address Christmas cards and call Aunt Emma, and maybe even bake a cake.

She went to the small cherry-wood desk in her bedroom and took out her cards. With great determination she sat down and picked up her pen. An enormous restlessness continued to stir in her. Maybe she should bake the cake first.

She started toward the kitchen, then remembered her paltry supply of staples. There was not enough flour to make a cupcake, let alone a whole cake, and she had less than a quart of milk and no sugar.

She prowled and paced through her house half a dozen times, then suddenly remembered that the drive-in theater ran all-night movies on Mondays. Even during the winter.

Amanda loved the movies, and she wasn’t discriminating—horror, fantasy, drama, classics, musicals—it didn’t matter what was showing. She enjoyed immersing herself in the make-believe world of the movies.

She got her coat from the hall closet and was headed out the door when the phone rang. She picked it up.

“Hello, darling. It’s your Aunt Barbara.”

Amanda sighed. The only thing more longwinded than Aunt Barbara was a freight train full of hot-air balloons.

“Hello, Aunt Barbara. How are you?”

Aunt Barbara began to tell her, in minute detail, exactly how she was. Amanda resigned herself to missing the first two shows at the drive-in.

 o0o

Tanner whistled all the way home. He was still whistling when he bounded up the steps to his house.

“Tanner’s home,” he heard his dad say. “Nobody bangs the front door the way he does.”

He walked down the hall and stuck his head around the door. His parents were sitting in front of the fire. “Hi, Mom, Pop. Is that popcorn I smell?”

Matthew Donovan laughed. “What did I tell you, Anna? That boy can smell popcorn a mile away. I might as well make another popper full.”

Tanner held up his hand. “None for me. I have things to do. Have fun, you two. See you later.” He left, whistling.

With visions of Amanda dancing in his head, he went upstairs and made his calls. When he had finished, he gave a satisfied chuckle. He had set the wheels of romance turning, and now all he had to do was be patient—a completely new role for him.

He picked up a magazine and flipped through it. Nothing
Newsweek
had to say interested him. He stuck a tape into the player, but that was a mistake. It was a love song, and it reminded him of Amanda. He turned it off. In his state of mind he’d be likely to storm her house and take her by force. That wouldn’t do. Not at all. He had to court and woo and romance her again. Starting tomorrow.

Grabbing his jacket, he headed down the stairs. There was one place he could go when he needed to forget everything and make time pass quickly— the movies. Picking up the newspaper from the hall table, he searched for the entertainment section. To his delight the drive-in still had all-night movies on Mondays. Tonight’s fare was horror—
The Creature of Darkness
,
Witches of Lust
,
Black Lagoon
,
Over My Dead Body
, and
Girl of My Nightmares
. He laughed. That last one sounded like the story of his life.

 o0o

The drive-in theater was practically deserted. He parked near the concession stand, bought himself the largest tub of buttered popcorn, three hot dogs, a cup of hot chocolate, and two Hershey bars with almonds, and settled in for a movie marathon.

The first movie was already half over, but that didn’t matter. Tanner had the whole thing figured out in five minutes. The good guys would save the town from the creature.

They finally did, just as Amanda’s car drove by. Tanner craned his neck to follow her progress. Apparently she didn’t see him, for she never looked in his direction. Her car cruised down the lane and eased into a slot two rows in front of his. There was nothing to mar his view of her except two speaker posts. He felt his heart quicken. Sentimental fool, he thought, chiding himself. He leaned forward to get a better view. Her hair glowed in the fluorescent lights. He’d never realized how sexy the back of a woman’s head could be. He gazed at her, imagining the feel of that hair against his cheek.

The squawking of his speaker box made him jump. To his chagrin he realized his hand was buried in the tub of buttered popcorn and had been since Amanda had driven by. Furthermore he had no idea how the movie had ended.

He wiped the butter off and considered joining her. Then he had second thoughts. Like him, she’d always used movies as a means of escape. She probably needed this evening of privacy as much as he did. Strange, he thought, how loving a person could make a difference. Yesterday he would have gotten boldly into her car, pulled her into his arms, and taken what he wanted. Tonight he couldn’t be that selfish. He would never again touch her without consideration of her feelings. The next time he kissed her, she’d know it was love.

Tanner leaned back to watch the second movie,
Witches of Lust
. Just his luck, one of the beauties on the screen looked too much like Amanda for his comfort. When the movie progressed from the witch part to the lust part, Tanner had to clench his fists to keep from leaping out of his car and getting into Amanda’s. The times he and Amanda had petted at the drive-in movies! His windows were steamed up simply from thinking about it.

He reached for a cold hot dog and tried to concentrate on the movie.

 o0o

Amanda fidgeted in her car. The movie would have helped her forget if it weren’t so sensuous. Probably what she needed was a big box of buttered popcorn. It would be hard to eat, watch, and think at the same time.

She hung her speaker back on the pole and got out of her car. There was Tanner, as big as life, sitting two rows back in his red Corvette, leaning back and grinning at her. No, leering. That’s what he was doing. She felt her silly heart bump against her rib cage.

I’ll ignore him
, she vowed.

She turned around and marched straight ahead to the concession stand, never looking in his direction. On the return trip, her buttered popcorn clutched in her hands, she tried to discipline herself to ignore him still. But she couldn’t. She felt compelled to glance in his direction. He lifted his hand in salute. She gave a slight nod, as if seeing him didn’t bother her at all, and then she climbed into her car. She was concentrating so hard on appearing unruffled that she tangled her foot in the speaker cord. The speaker squawked as it bit the dust. Using all the dignity she could muster, she rescued it, got into her car, and hung the devilish contraption on the side of her door.

She stared straight ahead, looking at the screen without seeing a thing and eating her popcorn without tasting a bite. Oh, Lord, the times she and Tanner had loved at the drive-in!

There had been other times, too, fun times with a gang of kids from the high school. Carefree times when Claude had stolen the show by telling them all some outrageous story that made the movie pale by comparison.
Claude
. He was between them like a wall. She wondered if Tanner was thinking of him, too.

She could feel Tanner back there. She could picture the ways his eyes gleamed with the flashy drive-in lights shining in them. It made her feel hollow to look straight ahead and pretend she didn’t notice him, to pretend she didn’t care.

The movie finally ended. Her neck was stiff. As the reels were being changed, she rubbed the back of neck, tilting her head this way and that to loosen the muscles. It seemed only natural that she should glance back at Tanner. Just a glance, she told herself.

He was looking at her. Even from two rows back she could tell. She saw him smile. She ached to touch him. The need was so strong that she felt foolish sitting in her car denying herself.

Following her impulse, she opened her door and started walking his way. She’d say hello, a casual greeting between two adults. All the way to his car she rationalized her motives.

She could feel the heat of his glance as he watched her walk. Breathing deeply, she tried to slow the trip-hammer rhythm of her heart. It was useless. By the time she leaned toward his window, she felt as if she’d run a twenty-six-mile marathon.

She rested her hand on the door. “Hello, Tanner.”

“Amanda!”

She wished his eyes wouldn’t gleam so. It made being casual very hard.

“Enjoying the movies?” Brilliant, she thought, chiding herself. Nor only did she sound breathless, she sounded simpleminded.

“Yes. Are you?”

His smile was so endearing, she almost didn’t notice that he seemed as ill at ease as she.

“Yes.” She knew there were other words in her vocabulary, but she couldn’t think of them. She figured she’d think of all sorts of witty replies as soon as she got back in her car.

Tanner put his hand over hers. “Won’t you join me? There’s room for two.”

“No.” The word hung in the air as they looked at each other. There’d always been a form of telepathy between them, messages they relayed with their eyes. She knew he wanted her. The naked desire was there, gleaming in his eyes. She wondered if she’d masked her own desire.

“You’ll get cold standing out there.”

His voice was like a caress, his tone gentle with concern. The sound of it made her feel warm and protected and cherished. With great clarity she saw how easy it would be to love him again. She knew she should go, but she wanted to feel his hand on hers a moment longer.

“No,” she said. “I won’t be standing here that long.”

“I see.”

He flashed that endearing smile again, and still she couldn’t go.

“Please thank Anna for the chicken and dumplings.”

“I will.”

Even though the night had turned cooler, she felt warm through and through. She thought it was remarkable that Tanner could do that to her simply by touching her hand—and after all these years.

She leaned closer. “I’ll call on her soon and thank her in person.”

“She’ll like that.”

His face was so close, she could see a tiny smear of butter on his cheek.

“You have butter.”

“Where?” His gaze never left hers.

“There.” She lifted her free hand and touched the spot on his cheek. Such a simple touch, and yet she felt as if she’d been plugged into the socket with the Christmas-tree lights.

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” Reluctantly she removed her hand. “It’s time to go. Goodbye, Tanner.”

She was two steps away when he called her name.

“Amanda . . .” Joy leapt in her as she turned back around. “I have something for you.”

As she stepped back to his car all sorts of thoughts ran through her mind. He’d lean out the window and kiss her; he’d pull her through the window and hold her; he’d get out and carry her into the concession stand, draped across his shoulder like a sack of potatoes, and make love to her right there under the fluorescent lights, where he’d have a big audience.

He did none of those things. Instead he held out a candy bar.

“Your favorite. I bought two so we could share.”

“How did you know I was coming?”

“I didn’t. I guess I just secretly hoped you would.”

“That’s sweet, Tanner. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

“Well . . . goodbye again.”

“Goodbye.”

As she walked back to her car she pondered on what had happened, how polite they’d been. They’d acted like two strangers trying to make a good impression. It was all very puzzling to her—and best not to analyze.

She climbed into her car, adjusted her speaker, and leaned back to watch the last movie. She hoped to fall into oblivion. All she felt was nervous anticipation and a tingling in her spine.

But she was determined not to leave. Then Tanner would know. What he would know, she couldn’t say, nor did she want to consider it.

 o0o

Tanner’s breathing didn’t get back to normal until Amanda was back in her car. Reaching for a Hershey bar, he tried to pretend she wasn’t up there in her car, tempting him beyond endurance, but he knew it was useless. Every minute that crawled by seemed to whisper her name.

He was determined to stay. Having her where he could see her for the next two hours was a gift too precious to throw away, even if he did have to suffer.

When the last show had ended, Tanner and Amanda started their cars and drove slowly down the dirt lanes between the speaker posts. They held a parallel course until they came to the exit. Then Amanda’s car turned in one direction, and Tanner’s in the other.