Social Skills (12 page)

“Nah,”
Tate said. “We’ll leave through the chem building entrance. That’ll put Connor
closer to his place, anyways.”

The cool
air felt amazing, and even though Connor knew he’d be freezing in a few minutes,
courtesy of sweat-drenched clothes, he’d never been happier to see his breath
than when they finally climbed their way out. All in all, he was glad he’d
gone; there was something to be said for having
the experience
, but he
wasn’t ready to make it a regular nighttime fare.

Beth
didn’t seem too enthused, either. As they stood shaking out the cramps from
their legs and waiting for Tate and A.J. to re-cover the hole, she murmured to
him, “Never again! That was scary…and really uncomfortable. I’m so glad you
were there, Connor. You were a real sweetheart.” Without warning, her
appreciative smile turned into a peck on his cheek.

He darted
his eyes around to see if anyone was watching, and caught Rebecca’s smug look
from a few feet away. “Uh, no problem…well, I’ll see ya later. We’d all
probably better get indoors before we catch pneumonia.”

“There’s
the responsible Connor we know and love.” Tate clapped him on the back.

“Wait,
you’re not coming to Brown to hang out?” Beth asked. “Your jacket is back
there. C’mon.”

“I’ll
get it tomorrow.” Connor shrugged away from her beckoning arm, growing more and
more apprehensive about the attention she was giving him. It wasn’t the same
kind of friendly acknowledgement he got from Rebecca or Chrissy. “You guys have
fun. I’ll catch ya later.”

He
waved as the group chorused their goodbyes, then took off jogging toward his
dorm.

***

Apprehension
met its cause the next afternoon, when he approached the lunch table to find
Beth sitting there. Her appearances at Newcomb were rare and usually brief, but
today she seemed settled in for the count, wearing a pink turtleneck sweater
that brought out the rosiness in her creamy complexion. Her hair was carefully
done in a French braid.

“Hey,”
she chirped as he set his tray down. “It’s my tunneling hero. If it weren’t for
him, I’d still be rotting down there.” She shot dirty looks to the rest of the
table.

“Connor
is very dependable,” Rebecca agreed. “The least flighty of us all, for sure.”

“Hey,
I’m not flighty,” Chrissy protested, and everyone, including Connor, scoffed.

“You
are, but it’s a deep sort of flightiness.” A.J. patted her hand.

Beth
leaned closer to Connor. “Well, I for one am thankful he decided to stick
around with you lot.” Her fingers brushed his arm, and she grinned at him
through strangely dark lashes for her hair color.

He
gave her a meager lip twitch as a response, his anxieties cropping back up with
a vengeance. Something about her attitude and physical proximity reminded him
of the way he’d seen Veronica hang all over Jared…and if that was anything to
go by, he was approaching dangerous territory.

He
chewed his food slowly, remaining silent throughout the meal.

After
thirty minutes, Beth rested her hand on his thigh. “Well, I have to get all the
way to the Physics building, or I’d hang out longer.” She slumped her shoulders
and gave a rueful wave. “Bye, guys.”

As
soon as she’d walked off, Rebecca shot out from her seat and latched on to
Connor’s arm. “Let’s grab some dessert.”

He
let himself be led away, but Rebecca wasn’t heading toward the food. She
dragged him out on the patio to a partially secluded corner.

“She
likes you,” Rebecca said. “You should definitely go for it.”

“Go
for…what?” Connor tried to skirt around her. “I could go for some ice cream.”

Rebecca
rolled her eyes. “C’mon, Connor. You’ve done so well coming out of your shell
this past month, don’t go back there now.”

Crossing
his arms, Connor attempted to settle his gaze into a glare, even though his
stomach churned at her rather accurate observation.

“I
mean, you know…adjusting to college can be hard for some people…I’m just saying.
Why not Beth? She’s smart, cute, funny…a little panicky in stressful
situations, but hey, you can work on that. You seem to have a calming effect on
her.”

He
shook his head. “Honestly, it’s nice of you to care, but I’m good.”

“Well,
what’s the problem? You’re not seeing anyone, are you?”

Connor’s
breath stopped mid-intake.

So there
was one more caveat for developing friendships: friends expected to
know
things
about each other’s lives. And now the best thing that had ever happened to him
had suddenly become, to Rebecca at least,
the problem.

He
opened his mouth slowly, and only with the greatest degree of willpower. He
couldn’t say yes. If he did, he’d be faced with an onslaught of unanswerable
questions. But for some reason, the lie was not forthcoming, either.

“N-no.”
He finally forced his vocal chords to move. “B-but I’m not looking for anything
right now.”

Words
had never tasted more bitter as they’d left his mouth.

Chapter Twelve

Connor
forced his eyes from the time display on his laptop to the blinking cursor on
the screen. He managed to type his name and the course number in a steady
rhythm before his gaze carelessly drifted back to the time again.

Not
even a minute had gone by.

Familiar
insecurities chipped away at him with new strength. What if Beth didn’t give up
so easily? Or Rebecca, for that matter? Dealing with the situation seemed like
it would require finesse, something he obviously lacked. Terrified of making
the wrong move, only one thing offered any hope.

Jared
would know how to handle it. And Jared already knew all his insecurities, so it
wasn’t like he needed to keep up the pretense of holding them back. Jared would
have just the right words, or just the right amount of gentle teasing to make
him feel like his problems were not nearly as insurmountable as they seemed.

Connor
gave up on writing and stared at his clock, willing the time to change. A
minute finally passed and he let out a sigh of relief before starting the
waiting game all over again. Once a week—or twice, at most—was not
enough time to spend with Jared.

When
the familiar knock finally came, he flung open the door and immediately sank
into Jared’s arms.

Jared
hugged him back approvingly. “I know. I missed you too.”

Connor
gave him a wan smile, tugging him onto the bed and then resettling in his arms.
“I wanted to call, but I knew you wouldn’t really have time to talk for long.”

“Yeah.”
Jared patted his chest. “I’m sorry. But I have time now. Four or five hours, in
fact. Told Ben I was driving out to Madison to meet a friend from high school.”

Connor
nodded, chewing on his tongue as he pondered how best to direct the
conversation.

“You
obviously have something on your mind.” Jared scooted a little closer. “Spill.”

Taking
a deep breath, he launched into his tale of the tunneling adventure and Beth’s
unexpected attention. Jared listened attentively, a quiet smile playing on his
lips.

“See,
I told you you’re attractive,” he said when Connor was through, reaching out to
ruffle his hair.

Connor
pulled away, strangely irritated Jared was not feeling any of the jealousy
he
experienced when catching a glimpse of Veronica. Apparently, Jared was all too
aware he had nothing to fear from a petite strawberry-blonde.

Jared
crossed his arms and regarded him with raised brows. “Still haven’t learned to
take a compliment?”

“It’s
not that,” Connor mumbled. “It’s just…it was an awkward situation. Beth
flirting, and Rebecca asking me if I was seeing someone…I mean, wouldn’t you
have been uncomfortable if it’d happened to you?”

“Uh…”
Jared quickly found something near the ceiling of the dorm room that required
his attention, and the realization hit Connor mid-sigh.

“Oh,
right. I guess that happens to you all the time.”

“Maybe.”
Jared shrugged. “But you have nothing to worry about. I have enough trouble
with Ronnie still, and we’re not even dating anymore. I would never get myself
into that again.”

Connor
drew his knees up to his chest, hugging himself to dispel the slight chill in
the air. This wasn’t exactly the solution he’d hoped for. Then again, he didn’t
know what would be.

“Hey,”
Jared said quietly, pulling Connor’s legs down so he could crawl closer and
sneak a kiss. He tried for a playful smile, but it slipped away when Connor
couldn’t muster the emotion to return it. “Why don’t we do something together
tomorrow?”

“Do
something?” Connor repeated doubtfully. He and Jared never
did something.
They
stayed indoors, where it was safe—safe to touch or kiss each other
whenever they felt the urge. And he understood Jared’s desire for secrecy, he
really did, but there
were
times when he wished…

“Yeah,
just you and me.” Jared covered his foot with a warm hand. “How ’bout around
three?”

“I
have two classes after three.”

“So
do I. Skip ’em. I don’t have anything else to do tomorrow, so I’ll be able to
spend the whole afternoon and evening with you.”

“Skip
class?”

“Yeah,
brainiac.” Jared chuckled, tickling his ribs. “We both know you’ll survive, and
I doubt it’ll put a dent in your 4.0.”

Connor
tried to protest for a few more seconds, until Jared grabbed him by the waist
and threw him down on his back. “All right, all right,” he groaned, struggling
for breath as Jared’s knee pressed into his stomach. First steam tunneling, now
skipping a day of classes. College was turning him into a regular delinquent. “So,
what something are we going to do?”

“It’s
a surprise.” Jared winked, then shifted his leg so he could press himself
against Connor in a much more enjoyable fashion. Too aroused to continue the
interrogation, Connor gave in to his hormones. Handling reality would just have
to wait.

***

Jared
showed up at a quarter to three the next day, wearing jeans and a red flannel
shirt. It was his footwear, though, that had Connor questioning his decision to
go along so readily.

“Hiking
boots?”

“I
know you probably don’t have them. You can just wear sneakers.”

“But
what are they for?”

“Uh,
hiking,” Jared replied smugly. “And don’t give me that face. I’ll go slow so
you can keep up.”

Connor
continued to stare. Did he stand any chance of seducing Jared into forgetting
about their afternoon plans?

He
almost laughed aloud at the thought.

“C’mon,
get ready,” Jared prompted, giving him a little shove.

Reluctantly,
Connor pulled on his shoes, and when Jared was distracted with a text on his
cell, surreptitiously grabbed his inhaler and shoved it in his pocket. If there
could be anything worse than trailing after the obviously fitter Jared as they
scaled a mountain, it would be him trailing while having an asthma attack,
without his inhaler.

Eager
to get on the road, Jared ushered him out the door and down to the cul-de-sac
where he’d left his station wagon illegally parked. The sight of its warped tan
siding and fake wood-grain interior instantly made Connor smile. It was only
the second time he’d had an opportunity to ride in Jared’s car, and despite
what a wreck it was, the privilege made him feel giddy.

He
yanked at the rusted handle to get in and flew forward into the window when the
door refused to budge.

“Oh,
yeah, sorry about that.” Jared gave him a sheepish grin. He leaned over to open
the passenger door from the inside. “Ben slammed it really hard the last time
we all went out, and now it doesn’t open very well.”

Connor
rolled his eyes. It was amazing Jared managed to spend as much time with
his careless and messy roommate as he did. Or maybe it was just
annoying,
since it was far more time than Jared spent with him.

He pushed
back the flicker of less-than-pleasant thoughts as the radio came on and an
unfamiliar twang filled the car.

Country music?

“I
didn’t know you liked country,” he remarked, and at least a little dismay
slipped through.

“Guess
I’m not as sophisticated as you are.” Jared laughed. “It’s not gonna bother
you, is it?”

“No,
of course not.” Connor resigned himself to suffer in silence.

The
chorus of the tale of two young lovers began to play, and Jared started humming
along. His voice matched the pitch surprisingly well, even though he’d sworn up
and down he had no musical sense whatsoever.

Connor
bit his lip to stop his smile, but couldn’t keep himself from leaning in to
peck Jared on the cheek.

“What
was that for?”

“Um…the
humming is…cute. And it makes this music a little easier to handle.”

Jared
shot his eyes skyward, flushing a pale pink. He was quiet for the next song,
but a few minutes later the humming was back, this time louder and with a broad
smile in Connor’s direction. Connor giggled, and by the end of the forty-minute
drive, found he was tapping his foot to the beat despite himself.

“Here
we are.” Jared pulled off the scenic byway and into a parking lot surrounded by
broad oaks. The outstretched tree branches hung over the car, casting shadows
across his face. “So, you ready?”

He’d
probably follow Jared anywhere, but Connor decided it best to stick with a
simple nod.

Jared
tugged on a backpack and began leading him up the dirt path, chatting nonstop
about the flora and fauna all around them.

“Check
out this ant trail!” He pointed to a wide swath of ants traveling the stump of
a tree. “They’re probably just coming out of hibernation.”

“That’s
cool,” Connor replied, less enthusiastic about the ants than he was about the
look of little-boy wonder on Jared’s face. “They’re such social creatures.”

Jared
turned back to him with a crooked smile. “You don’t think maybe, every once and
a while, two ants sneak off by themselves to have a little fun?”

“Maybe.”
Connor shrugged. “But they’d have to rejoin their colony sooner or later, right?
Could…could they survive otherwise?”

Jared
knit his brows, but before he got the chance to respond, a man and a little
girl came bounding up the path.

“C’mon,
or we won’t get to the top by sunset, Daddy!”

The
father gave them each a polite nod as he hurried past, and Jared stepped away
from the ants.

“Well,
you heard the girl. Let’s get a move on.”

The
dirt path gave way to rocks as they ascended, and the rocks began to pile on
top of each other with increasing steepness. Connor resorted to scrambling up
on all fours a few times, but when Jared skipped ahead and turned back to
watch, he attempted a difficult part of the trek while standing upright.

Which,
of course, only led him to slip, banging his knee on a jagged rock as he fell.

“Shit,
you okay?” Jared backtracked and helped him to his feet.

“Yeah.”
Connor dusted himself off. “I guess I should’ve told you I’m pretty clumsy.”

Grinning,
Jared squatted down and pulled up his pant leg. “Skinned your knee pretty good.”

Spots
of blood poked through the crisscross pattern of scrapes on Connor’s skin. “Oh…it’s
okay. I’m fine.”

Jared
rooted around in his backpack and pulled out a first-aid kit. “Always be
prepared,” he responded, then tore into an alcohol pad and gently pressed it
onto Connor’s wounded knee. He applied a Band-Aid as another group of hikers
bypassed them. “There you go. All better.”

Heart
fluttering mercilessly, and strangely, given all Jared had done was fix up a
scrape for him, Connor struggled to come up with a response. “Y-you were a boy
scout, weren’t you?”

Jared
offered him a hand to help him traverse the rough patch of rock. “Guilty as
charged.”

Five
minutes later they reached the summit, where the rocks flattened out and
provided the travelers with a stunning view of the surrounding peaks and the
valleys below. In the distance some of the trees on taller, neighboring
mountains were still covered with a dusting of snow, and as the sun began to descend
it touched their caps with fiery brilliance.

Jared
settled on a slab of rock and pulled two turkey sandwiches out of his backpack.
“Made us dinner,” he said, handing one over. “Guess I should have thought to
bring something warm to drink in a thermos, but I’m not that advanced in the
whole planning department.”

Connor
grinned and sat beside him. “This is fine.”

It
was
cold, though, and as he chewed his sandwich he found himself leaning toward
Jared’s side. He really wished he could just
snuggle
against Jared—throw
an arm around him like he did when they sat alone on his bed—but instead
he contented himself with staring out at the natural wonder before him.

He’d
seen beautiful sunsets along the ocean when he was a child, but something about
watching the sun disappear among the mountains was more powerful than that
gentle sinking into oblivion. Here the sun left waves of burning color in its
wake, turning the green trees into a multi-colored spectacle—its last gasps
of magnificence before it left that particular span of earth for the night.

Jared’s
hand inched closer to his along the rock where they sat until their pinkies
touched. Checking to make sure no one was near enough to notice, Connor linked
those fingers loosely, and Jared let out a thoughtful sigh.

“My
dad took us here, when we came for one of his reunions. I was only like
thirteen then, but I remember knowing I was going to come to this school, come
to this mountain again, because of him.” He swallowed, his Adam’s apple bobbing
up and down violently. “I miss him.”