Spinster? (22 page)

"I like art and writing best."

"Good choices. I liked writing too, but I was never much of an artist."

"Tess is a writer, Ella." That seemed to impress her, but she was still cautious.

"Really? Like books in the library?"

"No. I write for a magazine."

Ella nodded. "That's pretty cool." Tess could tell it would take more than being a writer to get in good with Ella, but that was all right with her. She hadn't expected to waltz right in and sweep them off of their feet.
 

"I'm going to big kid school like Sissy next week," Kate chirped.

"Not next week, Katie, next school year," Ella corrected. "She's in pre-K, so she doesn't know time very well."

"I'm old and I still have no concept of time," Tess teased.

"You're not old, you're pretty," Kate complimented, her blue eyes innocent and wide. She was super cute. Tess wouldn't blame Wes if he never said no to her. Tess would've handed over her wallet if she'd asked. Although, all she'd find were two pennies and an expired coupon for a free smoothie.

"Thank you, Kate. I think you're very pretty, too. Both of you. Your dad said you guys were beautiful, but I thought that's just what dads say." She winked at them, and they smiled back.

"May I interest any of you lovely ladies in a hamburger? I see Grandpa sweating buckets slaving away in front of the grill over there, and it smells really good."

"Me!" Kate yelled.

"Me, too!" Ella seconded.

Tess couldn't help but laugh, as she joined in,
 
"Me, three."
 

Wes's smile took her breath away. Happiness oozed from every pore as they walked around the pool towards the house.

"Only ketchup on mine, Daddy," Kate instructed.

"I know, baby."

"And no unyuns."

"No onions."

"Do you wike ketchup, Tess?" Kate asked wide eyed.

"I love ketchup!"

"You do?"

"Of course. Especially on french fries."

"Oooh, I love french fries!" Ella groaned.

 
'Cause what girl didn't like carbs?

They ate their burgers at one of five small card tables in the yard. It was covered in a beige linen table cloth, with burlap place mats. A short vase of lavender sat in the center. When evening fell the small lanterns were lit, and the pool lights were turned on. Tess
had
been...dreading wasn't the right word...but not looking forward to, this afternoon was more accurate. Not because she didn't want to meet them, but because she was nervous. Turns out she had nothing to worry about. The girls were precious, and seemed unfazed by her introduction into their lives. She'd been building this up to be an obstacle, when it turned out to be not even a speed bump. Was she relived by that fact, or unnerved? Having a therapist on speed dial would probably be a great idea.
 

Sex can be meaningless, no deep emotion, just two beings rubbing against each other—satisfying the baser need of lust. Then sometimes the connection is so deep, knowing where one ends and the other began, was anyone's guess. Tess had certainly experienced the first, but it wasn't until Wes that she'd experienced the latter, in it's truest sense. She'd thought she knew what real connection felt like, but she now knew it was as if she'd been dipping her toes in a shallow stream...now, complete submersion. She'd coaxed him onto his back, now their hands clasped, resting on the base of her spine. She fought the urge to let her head fall back, to close her eyes as sensations became too much, but she forced her head to stay upright upon her shoulders and looked into his eyes. Even as her mouth gaped with release she still held him in her sights. It wasn't until he shuddered beneath her that she fell onto his chest. Breathless. Sated. Content.
 

"That was amazing," he gasped. She could only smile into his skin, her ability to speak not yet returned. She rolled from her straddled position to the crook of his shoulder. Her normal MO was to run to the bathroom right after, for once she was in no such rush. They held each other in silence for some time, long enough for Tess's eyes to droop with sleep. "I keep waiting for it to get less amazing, but each time is as good as the next." She smiled at his admission, agreeing whole heartedly.

I'm scared." His voice was a whisper in the dark.

Tess lifted onto her elbow, sloughing off exhaustion like skin. She put her hand on his cheek, the scruff soft beneath her fingers. "Why?"

"I'm afraid you're going to wake up and realize that it's not worth it. The kids, the unstable ex-wife. My propensity towards workaholism. Need I go on?"
 

She smiled, his insecurity refreshing. And leave it to him to use a big word like propensity, despite their naked state below soft cotton sheets. Only moments ago, curses seemed to be the only words in his lexicon.
 

"I'm not going anywhere...and for the record, I adore your girls." That was the truth and the more time she spent with them, the more the adoration deepened. It had been a month since she'd met the girls and the bonding was taking time, well, with Ella at least. She was more apprehensive, but Tess didn't take it personally. Being abandoned leaves a mark on us all.

"And the other?" he asked, running his fingers along the ridge of her hip.

"Well, I tend to lose myself in work, too, so I understand that part. As far as your ex-wife is concerned..." She sighed and rolled onto her back. He followed her, hovering, caging her shoulders within his arms. As her eyes adjusted, the crease on the side of his eyes became visible. She wanted to tell him it wasn't an issue. She wanted to tell him nothing could make her run, but the thought of his ex made her edgy. Tess had no claim to him, to his girls, but Mila...she had history and blood. Tess never said her name aloud, as if it would have power over her if she uttered it. She was hundreds of miles away, so did it matter?
 

His eyes, they were pleading with her, so she found herself saying, "You
are
worth it. And I'll say it one more time...I'm not going anywhere."
 

This brought a relieved smile to his face, his mouth seeking hers. His kiss was gentle, until it wasn't...as if ferocity would make her words true. She felt the weight of him increase, his knee pushing her legs apart. It was strange. He kissed her with force, but when he entered her it was with gentle ease, as was the motion that followed. Their mouths broke apart. He looked down on her with an intense scrutiny that had her heart fluttering and racing in her chest.
 
As their bodies slid and met with that sweet push and pull, she knew this was one of those moments, the defining kind as they were called. She'd been falling for him for months, the real him, not some idea of him she'd conjured up based on the dreamy lust of a teenage girl. It wasn't until that moment she knew...he loved her. Even though she held the gold medal in being single, she knew that look. Did she love him? She'd have to think about it when she wasn't on the crest of an orgasm—which poured over her just a few second before he moaned her name. And with an exhaled breath, Tess let it all go, the walls, the insecurity, the doubt.

The truth was, she didn't need to think about it, analyze it, weigh her options, or wait for the afterglow to wear off.
 

Once Tess admitted to herself that she as in love with Wes, she knew it was time to throw herself wholeheartedly into the relationship.
 
Not like a clinger, but like a woman who knew what she wanted, and what she wanted was to be all in.
 
Wesley was right there with her. She found herself spending more time at his house, with him and his girls. Even Rigley, the Caraways' hyperactive Dalmatian, had seemed to adopt her into the family—following her around and circling his body into a ball at her feet whenever she committed to a chair in the living room. Wesley would call him a traitor with a warm smile on his face. But she refused to sleep over while the girls were home. Her idea, not his. Young girls were impressionable, and Tess felt co-ed sleepovers was probably not the best message to send.
 

Who knew she, too, could be old fashioned? It shocked the hell out of her.

They spent a fair amount of time with the girls around, but also managed to have time alone. Weekly lunches continued, as well as date nights. His parents were always willing to come over so they could go to dinner, or take them for the weekend when they went to spend a romantic weekend walking the colorful streets of New Orleans. Their days were spent in their suite overlooking the Quarter—their sweaty bodies had a little to do with the humidity and a lot to do with their naked marathon.

She'd introduced Wes and the girls to her sister and parents to rave reviews. Not that she was surprised. Wes being handsome and charming. Kate and Ella, precocious and precious in equal measure. Tess was pretty sure her mom ordered monogrammed Christmas stockings for them as soon as they left. Her nephews were still on the fence, reluctant to share the spotlight.

Tess had to pinch herself. This man...was everything she'd ever wanted, no, dreamed. His gentle hand on the small of her back. The soft kisses under her ear. The smiles and tender eyes he gave her from across the dinner table. Even when his focus was on his girls, he'd give Tess a wink or grasp her hand, just to let her know she was there, too.
 

And who knew that dream would include two little girls? Not her, not in a million years, yet Ella and Kate had become a significant part of her life. She was more like a cool aunt than a mother figure...how it should be. And even though their mother was non existent in their lives, it wasn't Tess's place to even try. Wesley had been both mother and father for over five years, he had it under control.
 

If one day he asked her to be part of this family forever, then she might re-evaluate things. The fact that she could even think about the happily ever after was unnerving, but not frightening.

 
She had no control of the future, but for once, she gave it up willingly. Look at her, adulting like a boss.

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

The rain hit the window like watery daggers. It was fitting with Tess's current pajama pant and worn college t-shirt ensemble. Her hair was in a nest on the crown of her head, her brow crunched in concentration.
 

"T, it's your turn!" Ella urged.

"I know, I know, keep your nightgown on," Tess replied.
 

"Why would she take her nightgown off?"

"Kate, it just a saying. It means to be patient," Ella answered. Tess smiled at the two little girls huddled around the board game in the center of the floor. They were having a rainy day in. Wes got called out of town for a deposition the day before, he was in a crunch, so she'd offered to come over at the crack of dawn to hang with the girls. It had been ages since she'd taken a day off from work.

Tess picked up her red game piece and put it in the slot. It slipped down snug over the yellow piece Ella had played a few minutes before. They were in the middle of a serious Connect Four tournament. Kate was trying to follow the game, but she was five and easily distracted. She made it halfway through the first game, her focus long returned to the horses she was playing with, complete with trailer and paddock.

"Darn, I was hoping you wouldn't notice." Ella huffed, her dark hair confined to a rubber band. Kate's own mop was in an erratic bushel, sticking out light socket style. She was so adorable—they both were, with their big bright eyes and dark curls. Ella had a splattering of freckles across her dainty nose, where Kate's was bare. Ella's eyes were hazel, and Kate's blue.

"I always notice, E."

"Oh, yeah? Is that why I beat you last game?"
 

Tess laughed. She loved Ella's competitive spirit. "Hey, I won the game before. Hence our best two out of three tournament. Which I'm about to win."

"We'll see." Ella took her yellow chip and held it up to her chin. "Hmmm. Where to play, where to play?"

"Who's taking their sweet time now?" Tess teased.

"Keep your jammas on, T!" Kate added. Tess and Ella burst into a fit of laughter. Tess leaned over and grabbed Kate into her arms. "I will, Button, I will." Tess started calling her after she kept pointing out how cute her little button nose was.

Ella sat up straight and smiled, it wasn't a good smile. Tess's eyes went to where Ella was about to release her chip.

"No!"

"Oh, yes...victory is mine!" With that Ella's piece fell into place. She'd set up a two way win, so no matter where Tess played, Ella would be the victor. Kate and Ella cheered. Kate more so, because she saw her sister excited.

 
Tess threw herself on the ground and hit the rug, "No! NO! I was so close! I demand a rematch!" Her moves and cries were exaggerated, making the girls laugh and dog pile onto her back until they were all in a ball of giggles. Tess could smell the syrup on Kate's skin, remnants of the huge batch of French toast she'd made them that morning. Greta's recipe. It brought back so many memories of sitting with her sister before Saturday morning cartoons. Tess had done a good job replicating the recipe and managed to put away three pieces. The girls seemed to love it as well.

"Okay, do you guys want to get dressed?" Tess asked, finally pulling herself upright, but still flanked by two warm bodies.

"It's so yucky outside. Can't we just stay in our pajamas all day?" Ella asked.

"Will your dad care if I don't get you guys dressed?"

"We have jamma day all the time, T," Kate added. It made Tess smile, imagining Wes and the girls piled on the couch in their flannels. The strange, yet exhilarating, a-ha moment was that Tess could see herself as part of that pile. She could picture herself flipping pancakes on a Saturday morning, the smell of bacon thick in the air. She could see it, and she wanted it, viscerally.
 

"Come on. Let's go see what we can throw together for lunch." Tess rose to her feet offering a hand to each girl.