The Definitive Book of Body Language (50 page)

If you're a man and you want to find out which women like you, wear a neatly pressed suit and tie, but wear the tie slightly off to one side and put a little lint on one shoulder. Any women
who find you attractive can't resist brushing the lint off and straightening your tie so that you look just right.

Wearing the tie slightly off center gives interested women the opportunity to straighten it

Surveys show that women continually express a preference for men with deeper, smoother voices because deep tones are directly linked to testosterone levels. The change in voice tone is noticeable in boys because, when they reach puberty, their bodies flood with male hormones as they begin to change into men and their voices “crack” virtually overnight. When a man is around a woman he fancies he's likely to start speaking in deeper tones to highlight his masculinity, while a responsive woman is likely to start talking in higher-pitched tones to contrast her femaleness. Since the feminist movement began in the
1960
's, women have taken on male job roles and tasks that require the production of testosterone, the hormone that drives us to achieve and that has been described as the “success hormone.” Research now shows that in countries such as the U.S.A., United Kingdom, Australia, and New Zealand, where feminism has been more influential, women's voices have become deeper because women have become more assertive and authoritative. Hopefully, the hairy chest won't follow.

Women's sexual responses to men are triggered visually by certain aspects of the male body. When it comes to a woman's favorite
male body parts, women are also universally split into three groups—legs, butts, and chests/arms with butts taking 40 percent of the votes for first prize. In this section, we will be analyzing only the physical characteristics of the male body and why each part has such an impact on the female senses.

Overall, women also look for athletic body shape, broad shoulders, muscular chest and arms, and a tight butt. Even in the twenty-first century, surveys overwhelmingly show women still want a man who looks as if he can wrestle animals and fight off invaders.

The upper torso of the hunting male is wide and tapers to narrow hips, whereas a woman's body is narrower at the shoulders and widens at the hips. Men evolved these features to allow them to lug heavy weapons over long distances and carry home their kills.

The male chest developed to house large lungs enabling more effective distribution of oxygen and allowing him to breathe more efficiently when running and chasing. In past generations, the bigger his chest, the more respect and
power a man commanded, and this is still the case with most surviving primitive tribes.

Women are attracted to a well-defined male upper body, but most dislike the “muscle man” bodybuilder look; a woman feels he is likely to be more interested in his own beauty than in hers

A small, compact butt is the favorite of women everywhere, but few understand its magnetic attraction. The secret is that a tight, muscular rear is necessary to make the strong forward thrusting motion needed for successful sperm transfer during sex. A man with a fat or flabby derrière has difficulty with this forward movement and has a tendency to throw his entire body weight into the thrust. For women, this isn't ideal, as the man's weight can be uncomfortable on her and make it difficult to breathe. By contrast, the small, tight rear promises a greater chance of doing an effective job.

The Internet has many sites for women to rate men's butts

Men's legs are attractive to women only insofar as they are symbols of masculine power and endurance. The powerful, angular legs of the human male are the longest of all primates and his narrow hips allow him to run swiftly over long distances to chase and hunt. Women's wide hips cause many women to have difficulty running, as their lower legs and feet
often splay out to the side to balance body weight. Leading U.S. neuropsychology professor Dr. Devendra Singh discovered that women find male hips with a 90 percent waist-to-hips ratio the most appealing.

The world is in the grip of a singles epidemic. In all Western countries, marriage rates are the lowest they've been in one hundred years—half the rate of twenty-five years ago. In places such as Australia, 28 percent of adults have never married.

The fact that men and women are initially motivated by body features may be disheartening to some but, on the plus side, everyone has the chance to improve their appearance and make a conscious decision to increase their attractiveness to the opposite sex. For those who choose to stay as they are, online dating, IT matchmaking, flirt-a-thons, and speed-dating events are booming everywhere and the
New York Times
estimated that it had an annual turnover of three billion dollars worldwide in 2003. And because men have more difficulty than women in meeting the opposite sex, most flirting classes worldwide have more male attendees than women.

We stake a physical claim on what we believe is ours

We lean against other people or objects to show a territorial claim to that person or object. Leaning against something can also be used as a method of dominance or intimidation if the object being leaned on belongs to someone else. For example, if you are going to take a photograph of a friend and his new car, boat, or personal belonging, it's likely that he'd lean against his new possession, put his foot on it, or place his arm around it. When he touches the property, it becomes an extension of his body and this is how he shows others that it belongs to him. Lovers hold hands or put their arms around each other in public to show competitors they have a claim over that person. The
business executive puts his feet on his desk or leans against his office doorway to show his claim to that office and its furnishings. A woman dusts imaginary pieces of lint from the shoulder of her husband to tell other women he's taken.

People showing ownership by connecting
the item to their body

An easy way to intimidate someone is to lean against, sit on, or use their possessions without their permission. In addition to the obvious abuse of another's territory or possessions, such as sitting at his desk or borrowing his car without asking, there are many other subtle intimidation techniques. One is to lean against the doorway in another person's office or to sit in his chair. A salesperson calling on a customer at his home should ask, “Which chair is yours?” before he sits, because sitting in the wrong chair intimidates its owner and puts him offside.

Victoria Beckham confirms her claim to David Beckham by imprinting her hand on his chest